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Dad jokes

JFinn26
JFinn26 Posts: 708 Member
in Fun and Games
Give me your best dad jokes:

I’ll start:

A priest, minister, and a rabbit walk into a bar.
The bartender asks “whaddaya having today?”

The rabbit replied: “I dunno...I’m only here because of autocorrect”

But the bartender is on his game... The bartender guesses correctly the bishop wants a glass of water, no ice so he can bless it. The priest got a glass of wine so he could use it for a small communion ceremony. They are amazed at the bartender’s ability. When he gets to the rabbit he puts down a big pint of beer. They all waited for an explanation....

‟I figured he’d want something kosher with hops.”
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Replies

  • LegionOfZoom
    LegionOfZoom Posts: 196 Member
    Bump
  • LegionOfZoom
    LegionOfZoom Posts: 196 Member
    edited March 2022
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    When you’ve got to go you’ve got to go
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  • sandejones
    sandejones Posts: 1,840 Member
    A priest, a pastor, and a rabbit entered a clinic to donate blood.
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    "I'm probably a Type O", said the rabbit.
  • itsjustme1984
    itsjustme1984 Posts: 413 Member
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  • Megan_smartiepants1970
    Megan_smartiepants1970 Posts: 44,393 Member
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  • itsjustme1984
    itsjustme1984 Posts: 413 Member
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  • sandejones
    sandejones Posts: 1,840 Member
    What is Forrest Gump’s email password?
    1forrest1.
  • Megan_smartiepants1970
    Megan_smartiepants1970 Posts: 44,393 Member
    When does a joke become a “dad joke?” When it becomes apparent.
  • Destanieroberts06
    Destanieroberts06 Posts: 103 Member
    Megan_smartiepants1970 wrote: »
    When does a joke become a “dad joke?” When it becomes apparent.

    OMFG
  • Megan_smartiepants1970
    Megan_smartiepants1970 Posts: 44,393 Member
    Destanieroberts06 wrote: »
    Megan_smartiepants1970 wrote: »
    When does a joke become a “dad joke?” When it becomes apparent.

    OMFG

    LOL
  • corinasue1143
    corinasue1143 Posts: 7,460 Member
    What’s the formula for water?

    Hijklmno

    Huh?

    H to O
  • Mama_Jones5
    Mama_Jones5 Posts: 82 Member
    *Drives past cemetery*
    Oh look a party! Everyone must be dying to get in!
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    TakeTheLongWayHome Posts: 816 Member
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    paperpudding Posts: 9,365 Member
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  • Minion_training_program
    Minion_training_program Posts: 13,440 Member
    Trying to revive this thread, not because i am a dad, because i am not, but because i like this sense of humor.

    Here goes

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    paperpudding Posts: 9,365 Member
    ladder rungs are made further apart than last century because people are taller

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  • Sandeagain
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    I don't know either, but the flags a big plus.
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    COGypsy Posts: 1,409 Member
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    They just can’t part with it.
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    I don't know and I don't care.
  • nossmf
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    You have a broken finger.
  • fatfrost
    fatfrost Posts: 367 Member
    I live between a tennis player and a lawyer. It’s makes things convenient. Every morning i just say “good luck on the court”
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    Sandeagain Posts: 807 Member
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    paperpudding Posts: 9,365 Member
    I was playing with my toy boats.
    One tipped over so I used it as a hat.

    Because it was cap sized.
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    nossmf Posts: 13,056 Member
    I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places.

    He told me to stop going to those places.
  • nossmf
    nossmf Posts: 13,056 Member
    What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

    Outlaws are wanted.

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