Building My Pyramid

Verchild

I haven't been able to do it lately. I have purchased the veggies, the low-fat ground beef/turkey, the chicken. I have removed the bad, sugar-filled garbage from the pantry. I have my exercise tools laid out, my walking routes planned for 1,2, and 3-mile walk/runs. I have the desire and understanding of the science behind why things work.

Yet I am still here, at the restart point of my fitness journey. I think I'm starting to understand why. My Pyramid is broken again.

I was put into a position lately where I needed to write a paper, justifying why I wanted to keep my kids in their current school while my ex argues for change. In writing that paper I realized that in bringing up Maslow's hierarchy of needs that I was having the same problems that the kids would have if changed. The stability of my world keeps becoming unstable before I can reach the point where I can put my energy into the highest tier "Self-actualization" or the desire to become the most that one can be.

It's always random things, my ex and her crazy co-dependent personality shaking the foundations, work making demands of me, my own mental challenges. But each time I seal the cracks and try and start heading back to the top of it something else happens. Its exhausting climbing this ladder in my head, and besides that I am alone in all of this too. I have reached out to people for help and motivation, and as always they think its a good idea and encourage me in the moment. After that though I'm just on my own.

I read these posts where people say "Get a better attitude, cuz that's what drives you" or about the mindset you have. I WANT to lose weight. But how do I get to that point where I'm able to focus on me, when all I'm worried about it every other aspect of my life? When I'm sitting here worried that because of my weight I wont be around as long as I could be. When I'm always climbing down my ladder to the lower tiers to fix whats breaking down before I can be the most that I can be?

Am I the only one who feels like this? Do you have feedback on how to overcome it?

lmf1012

Unfortunately there may not ever be a time when life isn’t throwing you a bunch of curveballs. You don’t have to see it as adding a whole big thing to your plate all at once. Try implementing one small change into your life until it becomes routine and then add another. Before long, all of the elements will just fit in regardless of what is going on around you.