Taking a Break
rpkg62
Posts: 44 Member
Guess what ya'll? I'm fricken exhausted. I'm tired of pushing myself in every aspect of my life. To be a good wife/daughter, to be my best professionally, to have my $h*t together, to work out 5-6 days a week, to eat healthy, to be fit. You name it, I'm exhausted of it. I just can't. I can't read another perfect (to-good-to-be-true) success story. I don't want to be disappointed on yet another day on the scale. I don't want to hear about another miracle diet/regime. I don't want to hear another over simplification ("Just limit calories to X, THATS IT"). I don't want to see another motivational quote. I don't want to be solicited by a so-called fitness/nutrition/life-coach guru who started off relatively thin and then got a magical program to make their life perfect. I just don't. Here's another fun fact: I didn't need to have kids to be overweight, nope! Nor did I need to work three jobs and put myself through school! I have been overweight my ENTIRE life! Oh yeah, cheers to the lifelong fatties! I am so damn tired. To all those living their best life in peek fitness, awesome and good on you. But don't parade in my rain. I'm almost 30, and I spent most of my life being bullied by you, and made to feel less than. I've also spent most my life dieting and on weight loss programs (beat that!). I do have some progress, I am not a complete failure, but I just want to be angry right now. I am putting away the scale and diets for a week, I just can't right now and need a reset. Anyone else grumpy? #LetsTalkAboutLifeSucksSometimesRealQuick. #NoBeforeAndAfterPicsUnlessTheAfterIsFatter. #CanWeJustBeRealForAMinute. #WhatAreYouTiredOf. #CanAlsoSayWhatKeepsYouGoing. #NoNumbersPlease
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Replies
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Breaks are good!
Weight loss can be really hard on the body - you're coaxing it to do something it would really rather not do at all. It wears on you, physically and mentally. It's OK that you feel that!
Reading the forums here was the first time I had ever heard of a "diet break" - it's not giving up, but it is deliberately slowing things down. I took one in April and will do one again in a couple weeks. It's amazing how much it refreshed me and made me willing to try again, after I felt worn out despite the success I was having (I was going too hard.)
I have very little patience for much so-called "weight loss motivation." I like to stick to hard facts and data. It's less judgemental, less profit-oriented. It doesn't assign worth or value to me as a person based on how closely I stick to whatever metrics. Contemporary modern society is really astonishingly mean to overweight people. A little empathy goes a long way, but a lot of people don't have it and don't seem to want to.
I hope your break is refreshing.6 -
I am chronically angry about 'go big or go home' being the prevalent attitude about literally every aspect of life. If you're not giving ANY given pursuit absolutely everything you have, you might as well not bother. If you're not miserable and busting your absolute butt at it, you Doing It Wrong.
Work, family, weight loss, working out, casual hobbies, whatever. You've gotta give every single one of them all your time, money, and effort. NO FUN. ONLY WORK.
No and also screw (the general) you.
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Another reason to not push too hard is that can be counterproductive, as it is stressful, and so can raise cortisol, which can lead to water retention:
http://www.bodyrecomposition.com/research-review/dietary-restraint-and-cortisol-levels-research-review.html/
...a group of women who scored higher on dietary restraint scores showed elevated baseline cortisol levels. By itself this might not be problematic, but as often as not, these types of dieters are drawn to extreme approaches to dieting.
They throw in a lot of intense exercise, try to cut calories very hard (and this often backfires if disinhibition is high; when these folks break they break) and cortisol levels go through the roof. That often causes cortisol mediated water retention (there are other mechanisms for this, mind you, leptin actually inhibits cortisol release and as it drops on a diet, cortisol levels go up further). Weight and fat loss appear to have stopped or at least slowed significantly. This is compounded even further in female dieters due to the vagaries of their menstrual cycle where water balance is changing enormously week to week anyhow.
And invariably, this type of psychology responds to the stall by going even harder. They attempt to cut calories harder, they start doing more activity. The cycle continues and gets worse. Harder dieting means more cortisol means more water retention means more dieting. Which backfires (other problems come in the long-term with this approach but you’ll have to wait for the book to read about that).
When what they should do is take a day or two off (even one day off from training, at least in men, lets cortisol drop significantly). Raise calories, especially from carbohydrates. This helps cortisol to drop. More than that they need to find a way to freaking chill out. Meditation, yoga, get a massage... Get in the bath, candles, a little Enya, a glass of wine, have some you-time but please just chill.
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Just sending {{hugs}} your way.5
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we all have so much stress in our lives and the pandemic certainly hasnt helped any of it.
you do whats best for YOU and dont worry about anyone else!
i know for me, ive cut things from my life the past few months that even though i ENJOYED them, they were causing me more stress than enjoyment, and it was definitely the right call (not related to diet or weight loss)4 -
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Oh Honey, you're so young. I'm glad you're doing this for yourself- I wish I'd been easier on myself at your age. You are in control of your life and it sounds like you are in full awareness of that- good for you! I spent most of my life trying to please others, trying to live up to other people's standards of what I should do, be, look like. It's all a waste of time. You're perfect as you are. I wish I'd known that at 30.5
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penguinmama87 wrote: »Breaks are good!
Weight loss can be really hard on the body - you're coaxing it to do something it would really rather not do at all. It wears on you, physically and mentally. It's OK that you feel that!
Reading the forums here was the first time I had ever heard of a "diet break" - it's not giving up, but it is deliberately slowing things down. I took one in April and will do one again in a couple weeks. It's amazing how much it refreshed me and made me willing to try again, after I felt worn out despite the success I was having (I was going too hard.)
I have very little patience for much so-called "weight loss motivation." I like to stick to hard facts and data. It's less judgemental, less profit-oriented. It doesn't assign worth or value to me as a person based on how closely I stick to whatever metrics. Contemporary modern society is really astonishingly mean to overweight people. A little empathy goes a long way, but a lot of people don't have it and don't seem to want to.
I hope your break is refreshing.
Can't stand "weight loss motivation", its a cruel world. Breaks are good1 -
wunderkindking wrote: »I am chronically angry about 'go big or go home' being the prevalent attitude about literally every aspect of life. If you're not giving ANY given pursuit absolutely everything you have, you might as well not bother. If you're not miserable and busting your absolute butt at it, you Doing It Wrong.
Work, family, weight loss, working out, casual hobbies, whatever. You've gotta give every single one of them all your time, money, and effort. NO FUN. ONLY WORK.
No and also screw (the general) you.
YES!!!! No "Go Big or Go Home", I am sometimes accused of this mentality and I definitely do not endorse it. Also I totally hate (the general) "you". I'm right there with you2 -
callsitlikeiseeit wrote: »we all have so much stress in our lives and the pandemic certainly hasnt helped any of it.
you do whats best for YOU and dont worry about anyone else!
i know for me, ive cut things from my life the past few months that even though i ENJOYED them, they were causing me more stress than enjoyment, and it was definitely the right call (not related to diet or weight loss)
#PandemicStressIsReal. Gotta reevaluate constantly what the priorities are2 -
lauragreenbaum wrote: »Oh Honey, you're so young. I'm glad you're doing this for yourself- I wish I'd been easier on myself at your age. You are in control of your life and it sounds like you are in full awareness of that- good for you! I spent most of my life trying to please others, trying to live up to other people's standards of what I should do, be, look like. It's all a waste of time. You're perfect as you are. I wish I'd known that at 30.
So I hear you, but I have also heard the "do this while you are young" my whole life. Literally, that was my first introduction to diet/obesity culture, which came from my parents. I have always been told to do this now because I am young. Fun fact: I currently weigh less than I did when I was a 12 year old....and I am not done.
I love myself and am doing this for me. I can feel happy and confident as who I am, and still want the best for myself for the future. I need to do this for me and future family. They way I honor and celebrate my body is by taking care of it.
P.S.
YES to screwing other peoples expectations! Its not worth trying to living to other peoples standards5 -
[quote="lauragreenbaum;c-46080629"
YES to screwing other peoples expectations! Its not worth trying to living to other peoples standards
Or what we perceive to be others' standards. I detest that media hype is all over the newest weight loss magical formula along with this celebrity in a bikini or that celebrity showing the perfect body. We don't all have personal trainers/shoppers/chefs. I hate that media doesn't promote loving yourself where you are more than they do. I hate that skinny/thin/runway models are still so looked up to.
JMO
I used to buy lots of women's magazines(don't waste my money now) but there'd be an article all about losing 25 lbs in a month right next to an article about baking the best brownies in the world. Talk about sending unrealistic and mixed signals.2 -
@rpkg62 - Just want to acknowledge you for stepping into, and feeling your feelings. Stand in your reality. Experience what is going on for you. Feel it, and move beyond it - even if it takes time - even if it's difficult. Your feelings are valid and I admire your vulnerability in sharing them.2
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I know I get sick of it, I want to be a normal person who eats like others but I know I am like an alcoholic, some foods I just cant quit eating. I have to get the right mindset. This food is so abusive to me,caused so much damage to me so being fat is hard also. I realize I have to eat different from the so call normal so here I go and eat my healthy foods. Lean meat, fruit instead of donuts, etc etc. I wish it could be different but it is not so I will do the best I can. I feel for anyone with food struggles but it is the cards we are dealt.3
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Found your post quite refreshing! A week break is good. Because it sounds like you really do appreciate your whole being. When I was thinking about losing weight years ago, I approached it from the standpoint of, "I'll either slim down, or I won't"-- and I loved myself regardless. Little changes, over the long haul, and I wanted to do things that I could stay with!0
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Good for you- you know what you need and you are doing it. I am just coming back after a several week break- and it was what I needed. I was finishing up a job and then I was on a 12 day vacation and I refuse to forgo local cusine when I am away. During those few weeks I logged less and less until I was not logging at all. Except for walking I did not exercise. When I got back I started meal planning and grocery shopping. I logged some over this past weekend. This morning I have fully recommitted because I am ready and I want to. I have exercised, planned my food for the day and worked out for 50 min. I know I would not be doing this if I had not allowed myself that break when I needed it. The only thing I did regularly was log into MFP so I wouldn't break my streak because that was important to me. I didn't read posts, I didn't log food or exercise.0
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penguinmama87 wrote: »Breaks are good!
Weight loss can be really hard on the body - you're coaxing it to do something it would really rather not do at all. It wears on you, physically and mentally. It's OK that you feel that!
Reading the forums here was the first time I had ever heard of a "diet break" - it's not giving up, but it is deliberately slowing things down. I took one in April and will do one again in a couple weeks. It's amazing how much it refreshed me and made me willing to try again, after I felt worn out despite the success I was having (I was going too hard.)
I have very little patience for much so-called "weight loss motivation." I like to stick to hard facts and data. It's less judgemental, less profit-oriented. It doesn't assign worth or value to me as a person based on how closely I stick to whatever metrics. Contemporary modern society is really astonishingly mean to overweight people. A little empathy goes a long way, but a lot of people don't have it and don't seem to want to.
I hope your break is refreshing.
I completely agree with "I like to stick to hard facts and data". I think a break would be good and some real science on how our body processes foods will give you an amazing insight on just what really can effect your body. I kind of made my own program based on science. Hard facts and data from real research by scientists that are not doing it to sell their books or products but to really open peoples eyes is what I needed. The fundamentals are very easy to learn and digest (no pun intended LOL)
I know a person who brags she needs carbs to burn off at the gym and she is really over weight. The problem is, is shes spending all her time "trying" to just burn off what she ate but never burns fat from the core. But she insists thats her thing. Anyway. Breaks are good to just recharge and rethink.1
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