Guys, I'm really happy.
xxcooneyxx
Posts: 221 Member
(NOTE: I realize this is going to come off as cheesy, but I wish I had been able to read something like this when I started my journey. )
I've seen it several time on here. People who lose the weight,only later to realize that even when they are no-longer overweight, that they are not happy. Many of us who have been overweight for the majority of our lives, sometimes feel like “If I can just lose the weight, then I will really be happy” only to find out later that they are not. I did it myself. In my own head, I think I traced nearly every negative thing in my life back to the fact that I was morbidly obese. I pinned the blame of all my failures and issues on my fat. Then, when I lost the majority of the weight (the first time) I realized that besides my pants size, nothing had changed. I still had so many issues that were making me depressed. I found that, no matter how much weight I lost, I still never lost myself. That was what was making me unhappy. Myself. I realized that I had to fix my insides before I could love my outsides. At that point in my life, losing weight began to feel like putting a new roof on a house that was rotting from the inside out.
Many of us are heavy because we just really like cake. Others of us, are heavy because of other psychological issues. Heck, at times it's a bit of both isn't it? For many of us, we can paint the outside of the house all we want, but we will never be happy living there until the termites inside are exterminated. I had to do a lot of personal work with a therapist after I was diagnosed with my eating disorder. Now here I am, years later, and 130 pounds down, and I realized that today, for one of the first times (that I was aware of) I was just brimming with happiness. I felt like I looked good and that made me feel confident. Because I felt confident, I was brave about sharing my true self with new people because “I have nothing, to fear, I'm pretty amazing.” For the first time ever, I think if someone had told me they didn't like me, I would have chalked it up to their problem, not my problem. I can't remember ever just being so damn pleased with every aspect in my life.
For once, I realize my boyfriend loves me because I'm pretty amazing, not because he just hasn't realized “what a mess I am.” For once, my daughter loves me because she has a great mom, and not because “she doesn't know better.” For once, I got the job because I am a very knowledgeable and capable person. For once, I'm taking the hard class because I know I am completely capable of handling it. I'm worth it god dammit! AND YOU ARE WORTH IT TOO. YOU ARE NOT THE EXCEPTION!
After reading so many stories through my journey, about people who lose the fat and are still not happy, please, let me tell you that happiness is attainable. There is a way to achieve it. Sure, life will still be hard at times, and you will still have obstacles, but if you believe that you are the capable person that I know you have inside, it will prevent you from crumbling under pressure and succumbing to the negative voice in your head. Losing the weight will not make you feel better. Finding the will to fight will. And once you find the fighter in you, it will permeate every aspect of your life. Because, you could do it. You could always do it.
I've seen it several time on here. People who lose the weight,only later to realize that even when they are no-longer overweight, that they are not happy. Many of us who have been overweight for the majority of our lives, sometimes feel like “If I can just lose the weight, then I will really be happy” only to find out later that they are not. I did it myself. In my own head, I think I traced nearly every negative thing in my life back to the fact that I was morbidly obese. I pinned the blame of all my failures and issues on my fat. Then, when I lost the majority of the weight (the first time) I realized that besides my pants size, nothing had changed. I still had so many issues that were making me depressed. I found that, no matter how much weight I lost, I still never lost myself. That was what was making me unhappy. Myself. I realized that I had to fix my insides before I could love my outsides. At that point in my life, losing weight began to feel like putting a new roof on a house that was rotting from the inside out.
Many of us are heavy because we just really like cake. Others of us, are heavy because of other psychological issues. Heck, at times it's a bit of both isn't it? For many of us, we can paint the outside of the house all we want, but we will never be happy living there until the termites inside are exterminated. I had to do a lot of personal work with a therapist after I was diagnosed with my eating disorder. Now here I am, years later, and 130 pounds down, and I realized that today, for one of the first times (that I was aware of) I was just brimming with happiness. I felt like I looked good and that made me feel confident. Because I felt confident, I was brave about sharing my true self with new people because “I have nothing, to fear, I'm pretty amazing.” For the first time ever, I think if someone had told me they didn't like me, I would have chalked it up to their problem, not my problem. I can't remember ever just being so damn pleased with every aspect in my life.
For once, I realize my boyfriend loves me because I'm pretty amazing, not because he just hasn't realized “what a mess I am.” For once, my daughter loves me because she has a great mom, and not because “she doesn't know better.” For once, I got the job because I am a very knowledgeable and capable person. For once, I'm taking the hard class because I know I am completely capable of handling it. I'm worth it god dammit! AND YOU ARE WORTH IT TOO. YOU ARE NOT THE EXCEPTION!
After reading so many stories through my journey, about people who lose the fat and are still not happy, please, let me tell you that happiness is attainable. There is a way to achieve it. Sure, life will still be hard at times, and you will still have obstacles, but if you believe that you are the capable person that I know you have inside, it will prevent you from crumbling under pressure and succumbing to the negative voice in your head. Losing the weight will not make you feel better. Finding the will to fight will. And once you find the fighter in you, it will permeate every aspect of your life. Because, you could do it. You could always do it.
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Replies
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That's awesome! Happiness is something that comes from within not just by losing weight alone.. I'm glad you've realised this xxx0
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:flowerforyou:
:drinker: Love this post, thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings on this. You are so right, happiness is not found by losing weight, and sooo many, myself included, look at weight loss as that ONE THING that can bring them forever happiness. 0 -
This is great thanks for sharing0
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A nice read and very true happiness only comes from within.0
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This is not in slightest bit 'cheesy'
The journey you have described is truly inspirational
You should be very proud of what you have achieved and what you've overcome, in order to become the obviously happy person you now are :happy:
You're right... there are a lot of stories on this site.... this particular story is by far one of the better ones!!
Thank you for sharing with us
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Thank you for a gr8 post, u r awesome!0
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what a great post. congratulations on your found happiness and realizing that you're worth it!
You're right, I wish I knew this when I was in high school...i was smaller and wasn't happy...fast forward to when i was 253 i had just gotten engaged and was the happiest(and heaviest) I've ever been.
I feel like I'm losing the weight the right way not only because of how i control my portions and exercising but because I'm losing it for the right reasons.
Thank you again for sharing, this is a great message 0 -
Aww, this made me tear up... who am i kidding? Tears are rolling down my cheeks.
Thank you! This is very inspirational.0 -
I guess its a bit like single people who think they will be happy when they find someone!
Happiness comes from within...
Nobody else can make that happen except yourself ...
Very true words)x 0 -
Wonderful post! Couldn't have have said it better, myself!0
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What and awesome and inspirational post. Thank you for making my day.
I look forward to getting to know my inner fighter and embracing that beast and moving forward and being truly happy.0 -
Great post! Thanks for the wisdom and inspiration.0
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Perfect. Glad you are happy and comfortable with your inner and outer self! :-)0
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Love this!!!! Good for you! I've been reading books about happiness on my kindle lately. It's all about loving yourself and who you are. Not what you look like, what you own or how successful you are at your job. It's all about love and enjoying life.0
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Congrats on finding your inner happiness!0
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Not cheesy, quite insightful!
Thank you for posting your story!
:flowerforyou:0 -
ah, I didnt find any cheese
Thank you for sharing this :flowerforyou:0 -
:drinker:
This is absolutely wonderful! You should be a motivational speaker with a story like this!
Definetly sharing this post with my MFP friends0
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