Will never reach your goal

tylerbreelayne

I met with a personal trainer that told me I wouldn't be able to meet my goal. I've been overweight my entire life. I've lost weight and gained it. No matter what I'm always overweight. I don't want to be smaller. I just don't want to be fat anymore.I was 285 pounds at my highest weight. I'm currently at 264 pounds. I have multiple goals but my ultimate goal is 135. I'm 5'3 and I have hips for days just to give you some perspective. I don't normally post but I'm having a hard time staying motivated. Is there anyone out there with similar goals?

callsitlikeiseeit

I used to weigh 387 pounds. as of 2 days ago, I weigh 178. I have about 40 pounds to go. I'll get there when I get there. I'm 5'1. 43 years old. If I can do it... anyone can. truly.

Tell your trainer to shove off.

And YOU... go find another one. Or, don't. I only literally, just this past week hired one, and it is for strength training. Due to health issues (not weight related), I've lost a LOT of strength and muscle mass over the past year. I've been a member of a gym for the past 7 years almost, but other than that haven't paid a dime to anyone for anything.

tylerbreelayne

That's amazing! Yeah I didn't end up hiring him after that. The only reason I was considering it was for resistance training.

springlering62

tylerbreelayne wrote: »

That's amazing! Yeah I didn't end up hiring him after that. The only reason I was considering it was for resistance training.

Well thank heavens. A trainer should be nothing if not motivating. That was disrespectful of him to say it to your face and indicates to me he wouldn’t have done his best with you because clearly, you weren’t worthy of his Olympian skills.

callsitlikeiseeit

tylerbreelayne wrote: »

That's amazing! Yeah I didn't end up hiring him after that. The only reason I was considering it was for resistance training.

I sent you a friend request I talk more about my crazy life than anything else but I do try to help where I can and I'm pretty easy to get a hold of on here.

There are a lot of great trainers and more bad ones, I think.

What is really important, right NOW, is to learn how to weigh and log your food accurately. And it can be a bit tricky right at first. And to get in the habit of moving more. Intentional exercise is wonderful, but be cautious of doing 'too much too soon' and burning out. a lot of people do that. You lose weight in the kitchen, and gain fitness and health in the gym (or through activity).

when i first started working out, i didnt even consider it that. i just wanted to try and be a bit healthier. losing weight wasn't even my goal. I mean, i needed to, and knew i needed to, but i just wanted to try and be healthier. I started by just going on a walk 2-3 times a week. and.... it wasn't much of a walk. at almost 400 pounds i could not go very far at all. 10 minutes was about all i had in me. but i kept doing it. and it didnt take long, really, before i could go a little bit longer. and then, i started to go more often. always when it was dark, i didnt want people to SEE me - but id go after dark, or early in the morning. often, both. more days added. my neighbor was a member at planet fitness and asked me if i wanted to go with her (she only went occasionally). I said sure. So I'd go with her. i thought i was going to die on the elliptical. lasted about 7 minutes. But kept going. maybe once a week with her? not very often. kept walking. By that point had started watching what I was eating (i think). Then i wanted to go to the gym more than she did, so got my own membership. That was back in 2014. for 2 years I was in maintenance, working on losing the last 40 or so now. So... all of it was a process. a long one. But I didnt give up. You dont have to work out to lose weight. As I said, that happens in the kitchen. But it does have many other benefits that your body does need. Find something you enjoy. Most Y's are affordable and have a wide variety of classes for all fitness levels. Make small changes. dont try to change everything overnight. little changes can lead to giant ones, if you give it enough time.

Due to (basically) complications with medications, my doctor pulled me off all gym activity at the beginning of the year. Just this past week, he gave the okay for strength training (but still no cardio). So, im starting that. And let me tell you... I feel like its the first day back at planet fitness on that elliptical. This is a whole new ballgame for me and my body is telling me as much. So, in a lot of ways... I'm where you are. And I know, for a fact I can do this. And I know, YOU can too

88olds

Likely your trainer would have told me the same. But I lost 100+ lbs to a healthy BMI and have been maintaining for years.

If you like your training sessions I wouldn’t bother to fire him. Actually exercise is overrated as a weight loss tool. But exercise does a lot of good stuff for us, especially our brains. A fitness plan seems a good fit with weight loss. But beware a PT who wants to give you dietary advice. They aren’t really trained in that and few of them have personal experience with weight loss. Just don’t take what he says to heart.

It’s good to have a goal but don’t get hung up on the end. Actually there is no end. Significant weight loss takes a lot of persistence. I had to reinvent my plan about 4 times to lose 100 lbs. But even at goal the tinkering and adjusting never stops.
Always keep asking yourself if your plan is livable long term. Weight loss has two parts, eating in a calorie deficit and living with it. There’s a tendency to go all in on the calorie deficit and try to beat ourselves into living with it. Generally doesn’t work in the long run. Good luck.

tylerbreelayne

callsitlikeiseeit wrote: »

tylerbreelayne wrote: »

That's amazing! Yeah I didn't end up hiring him after that. The only reason I was considering it was for resistance training.

I sent you a friend request I talk more about my crazy life than anything else but I do try to help where I can and I'm pretty easy to get a hold of on here.

There are a lot of great trainers and more bad ones, I think.

What is really important, right NOW, is to learn how to weigh and log your food accurately. And it can be a bit tricky right at first. And to get in the habit of moving more. Intentional exercise is wonderful, but be cautious of doing 'too much too soon' and burning out. a lot of people do that. You lose weight in the kitchen, and gain fitness and health in the gym (or through activity).

when i first started working out, i didnt even consider it that. i just wanted to try and be a bit healthier. losing weight wasn't even my goal. I mean, i needed to, and knew i needed to, but i just wanted to try and be healthier. I started by just going on a walk 2-3 times a week. and.... it wasn't much of a walk. at almost 400 pounds i could not go very far at all. 10 minutes was about all i had in me. but i kept doing it. and it didnt take long, really, before i could go a little bit longer. and then, i started to go more often. always when it was dark, i didnt want people to SEE me - but id go after dark, or early in the morning. often, both. more days added. my neighbor was a member at planet fitness and asked me if i wanted to go with her (she only went occasionally). I said sure. So I'd go with her. i thought i was going to die on the elliptical. lasted about 7 minutes. But kept going. maybe once a week with her? not very often. kept walking. By that point had started watching what I was eating (i think). Then i wanted to go to the gym more than she did, so got my own membership. That was back in 2014. for 2 years I was in maintenance, working on losing the last 40 or so now. So... all of it was a process. a long one. But I didnt give up. You dont have to work out to lose weight. As I said, that happens in the kitchen. But it does have many other benefits that your body does need. Find something you enjoy. Most Y's are affordable and have a wide variety of classes for all fitness levels. Make small changes. dont try to change everything overnight. little changes can lead to giant ones, if you give it enough time.

Due to (basically) complications with medications, my doctor pulled me off all gym activity at the beginning of the year. Just this past week, he gave the okay for strength training (but still no cardio). So, im starting that. And let me tell you... I feel like its the first day back at planet fitness on that elliptical. This is a whole new ballgame for me and my body is telling me as much. So, in a lot of ways... I'm where you are. And I know, for a fact I can do this. And I know, YOU can too

Thank you i really appreciate it! I love cardio and really wanted to learn more about strength training but may wait until I lose a little more.

callsitlikeiseeit

tylerbreelayne wrote: »

callsitlikeiseeit wrote: »

tylerbreelayne wrote: »

That's amazing! Yeah I didn't end up hiring him after that. The only reason I was considering it was for resistance training.

I sent you a friend request I talk more about my crazy life than anything else but I do try to help where I can and I'm pretty easy to get a hold of on here.

There are a lot of great trainers and more bad ones, I think.

What is really important, right NOW, is to learn how to weigh and log your food accurately. And it can be a bit tricky right at first. And to get in the habit of moving more. Intentional exercise is wonderful, but be cautious of doing 'too much too soon' and burning out. a lot of people do that. You lose weight in the kitchen, and gain fitness and health in the gym (or through activity).

when i first started working out, i didnt even consider it that. i just wanted to try and be a bit healthier. losing weight wasn't even my goal. I mean, i needed to, and knew i needed to, but i just wanted to try and be healthier. I started by just going on a walk 2-3 times a week. and.... it wasn't much of a walk. at almost 400 pounds i could not go very far at all. 10 minutes was about all i had in me. but i kept doing it. and it didnt take long, really, before i could go a little bit longer. and then, i started to go more often. always when it was dark, i didnt want people to SEE me - but id go after dark, or early in the morning. often, both. more days added. my neighbor was a member at planet fitness and asked me if i wanted to go with her (she only went occasionally). I said sure. So I'd go with her. i thought i was going to die on the elliptical. lasted about 7 minutes. But kept going. maybe once a week with her? not very often. kept walking. By that point had started watching what I was eating (i think). Then i wanted to go to the gym more than she did, so got my own membership. That was back in 2014. for 2 years I was in maintenance, working on losing the last 40 or so now. So... all of it was a process. a long one. But I didnt give up. You dont have to work out to lose weight. As I said, that happens in the kitchen. But it does have many other benefits that your body does need. Find something you enjoy. Most Y's are affordable and have a wide variety of classes for all fitness levels. Make small changes. dont try to change everything overnight. little changes can lead to giant ones, if you give it enough time.

Due to (basically) complications with medications, my doctor pulled me off all gym activity at the beginning of the year. Just this past week, he gave the okay for strength training (but still no cardio). So, im starting that. And let me tell you... I feel like its the first day back at planet fitness on that elliptical. This is a whole new ballgame for me and my body is telling me as much. So, in a lot of ways... I'm where you are. And I know, for a fact I can do this. And I know, YOU can too

Thank you i really appreciate it! I love cardio and really wanted to learn more about strength training but may wait until I lose a little more.

Don't let one bad experience discourage you! Getting started SOONER will only help! Cardio is awesome, and that has been where my focus was, but strength training has a lot of benefits and does things for the body that cardio can not. So even if it is just using the weight machines for now (which I did always do) make sure to stick to that and increase the weight over time. 'New Rules of Lifting for Women' is a great book to pick up to learn from as well

springlering62

Here’s one to make you feel inadequate

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2021/09/18/weightlifting-guinness-record-100-year-old-tampa-woman/8260013002/

lorib642

That trainer does not sound very good. No wonder you have trouble with motivation. I believe you can do it. You already are. Don’t let that bad advice deter you. I am stalled but I know once I get past this slump I can get there.

LiveOnceBeHappy

Your trainer should find a new line of work. I'm a teacher. My job is to believe every kid can learn. If I stop believing that, I need a new job. That trainer is an idiot.

ninerbuff

Lol, that trainer's gonna be a failure at his/her job. Everything is possible when it comes to weight loss.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

elisa123gal

You can do anything you put your mind to doing. A lot of people reach their fitness goals and so can you.

It is almost funny if you think about it. A personal trainer who tells a potential client their is no hope? ha! That "trainer" needs to do some serious personal growth work and find a new profession.

kshama2001

tylerbreelayne wrote: »

I met with a personal trainer that told me I wouldn't be able to meet my goal. I've been overweight my entire life. I've lost weight and gained it. No matter what I'm always overweight. I don't want to be smaller. I just don't want to be fat anymore.I was 285 pounds at my highest weight. I'm currently at 264 pounds. I have multiple goals but my ultimate goal is 135. I'm 5'3 and I have hips for days just to give you some perspective. I don't normally post but I'm having a hard time staying motivated. Is there anyone out there with similar goals?

That's a BMI of 23.9, towards the high end of Healthy. Seems like a perfectly reasonable goal to me. I wonder why that trainer thought it wasn't attainable?