Need helpful tips for motivation

GarryA1987

I am coming up to 80 days of clean eating and exercise. I feel like this is my 3 month marker where I always fail, and its about to happen again!

I have lost all motivation to go to the gym and prepare food which is becoming my downfall. Once this bad habit starts, I will be back up to my starting weight in no time. I have hit a 17lb loss and fear I am going to lose it (well put it back on!).

What do you do to stay motivated in your darker times? I want to break my chain of yo-yo dieting by making it a lifestyle choice.

legblonde355

The only tip I have is look at how far youve come! You don’t wanna go back. I also read a quote that says you won’t always be motivated you have to be disciplined, which I think is very true.

snowflake954

I find it interesting (reread your post) that you refer to positive things needing "motivation", but bad things are "habits". There is your problem. The positive things need to become habits. Exercising---a habit. Eating correct portions---a habit.

Now, let's talk exercise. Perhaps you don't really like the exercise you've chosen. Look around and try something new. Movement that you like and becomes habit forming will serve you well all your life.

Next, the famous "clean eating". Lots of people lose weight eating what they want. Hit your protein goal and then fill in with the rest. Don't deny yourself treats in moderation. Cooking should be fun. I cook for 3-4 men everyday, twice a day, but you can still eat well without that. Maybe you should do a mix, cook some days and order others (watch your calorie goal). Or, if you have a day with more time batch cook, and freeze so you'll have food you made readily available.

There are ways to work things out so you can keep going. Don't be afraid to change things up when you need a break, or they're not working anymore. Don't be too rigid in your approach. Best of luck, don't worry, you can do it.

Lietchi

I'm wondering if you haven't gone too 'hung ho'. Did you overhaul your diet completely and introduce a high frequency exercise regime in one go?
The best way to change your habits is gradually, step by step. And changing your habits is what you need to do to lose the weight and keep it off afterwards.

Also, I always hear alarm bells when I read the term 'clean eating': you don't need to eat 'clean' (whatever that means) to lose weight. If you're banning foods you like and are used to, you're just making it harder on yourself. Unless you have trouble moderating certain foods, eating 'non clean' foods in quantities that fit into your calorie goal is perfectly fine and less likely to lead to giving up.
If you're making yourself eat foods you don't particularly enjoy, that will also push you towards giving up.

Same with exercise: choose exercise you like or at least don't dislike. The point of exercise is health (you can lose weight without exercising) and if you like what you're doing, you're less likely to give up.

You don't say what your current stats are or your goal, but you've been losing at a rate of 1.5lbs per week. That's fairly aggressive. If you choose a slower rate of loss, you can eat a bit more/exercise a bit less, which would be more sustainable in the long run.

springlering62

Oh these are such fabulous replies!!!!!!

I can’t add anything except that “clean eating” equates with punishment in my lexicon.

I figure at this point, anything I eat is eons better than what I used to eat.

And I LOVE @snowflake954 ’s suggestion to “fill in” with foods you like. That’s exactly what I do!

thisvickyruns

GarryA1987 wrote: »

I am coming up to 80 days of clean eating and exercise. I feel like this is my 3 month marker where I always fail, and its about to happen again!

I have lost all motivation to go to the gym and prepare food which is becoming my downfall. Once this bad habit starts, I will be back up to my starting weight in no time. I have hit a 17lb loss and fear I am going to lose it (well put it back on!).

What do you do to stay motivated in your darker times? I want to break my chain of yo-yo dieting by making it a lifestyle choice.

is clean eating really a lifestyle choice you want to make? if it something you find difficult to do, then probably not?

cmriverside

80 days! Well done, you.
Something else that can be helpful is - just give yourself a week of eating more and instead of calling it "giving up" - let's call it a Diet Break/Refeed, shall we? Oh, look, a thread about it!
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10604863/of-refeeds-and-diet-breaks/p1
It's hard for everyone to stay on plan long-term. If you've been at this 80 days and you've been eating at an aggressive deficit then it's to be expected. I also second the motion that you look at your calorie goals again. I saw your pictures, and it looked to me like you could/should be set at "Lose 1 pound per week" now based on your distance-to-go. How much weight do you still need to lose to be in a healthy BMI range?
A week off (eating at your Maintenance calories, not having a free-for-all) will make you feel a lot better physically and mentally.

mirianyusm

First of all congratulations on your achievement. You got wonderful responses and I can't add anything to that. I only can only tell you about my experience. I've being up and down for a long time, WW, Mediterranean diet, Keto, you name it, and after about 3-5 months of being strict, one day I needed to eat something that I really liked and that was the end. This time around, I am down 47 pounds in 7 months and going strong. I have 30+ to go but this time, I got smarter. I haven't stopped eating any food groups. I like to cook and bake and if I want to bake a cake, I bake it and I eat a portion and log it. If I want pizza, either I bake it or I buy it and eat within my "budget". I don't have to prepare a different food for my husband and son, I just eat whatever we are having, just in sensible portions. In short, my experience is that I don't feel deprived and I don't feel that I fell off the wagon and I can't get back up at it if I ate something that doesn't look like diet food. There is no wagon and there is no diet food. If you go over your budget once in a while, it's ok, it is not the end of the world. Go back at it the next day. It is worth it. Regarding exercising, I like to swim, run and bike ride but you don't have to like any sports. I am sure you have something you enjoy and if you don't, that's ok too. It is good for your health to be active, but there are many ways to be active without going to the gym. Good luck!
PS: Last Saturday (Sunday too) I ate 7 fun size candy left over from Halloween but I planned for them and in my weigh in today, I am still down a few ounces. ☺

rosebarnalice

Sometimes it helps me to back off a little and give myself some slack. When I demand too much from myself, I can get in the trap of beating myself up when I don't meet my ultra-high expectations.

For example, I can remember that first rush of "LET'S DO THIS THING!" motivation, and going to the gym 5X per week and swimming for 1.5 hours. But honestly, that's not sustainable in the long run for me, so I had to stop expecting/demanding that of myself, and say instead, "Hey 2X per week for 45 minutes is a good goal that you can reasonably expect of yourself. You can do that, and if you're feeling feisty and want to go more, go for it! But don't berate yourself if you don't".

Same with food prep. I can remember being in the "cook every meal at home" mode, and while I generally LIKE cooking and eating at home, it's not a sustainable expectation for me. So my three much more reasonable goals now are:
(1) Make my own breakfast every day [except on very very special occasions] because I generally LIKE what I make at home better than anything I can get at a drive-through and I can save a lot of $$ in the process,
(2) Pack & log a big ginormous salad every workday (which I usually do simultaneously with making brekkie, so by the time I sit down for breakfast, lunch is literally in the bag). I give myself slack to go out to eat, cash some saved-up calories, or even occasionally NOT log a meal(!) on the weekends.
(3) Prep ONE "eat-on" dinner casserole/ soup/ stew per week with at least 4 servings. This is usually a weekend crockpot project that doesn't need a lot of supervision. It means that during the week, when I've worked late or had a stressful day and start that old tape in my head of "I really don't feel like cooking tonight--what I really want is to just head for the drive-thru and cuddle an extra large order of fries", I can stop myself and say, "oooh! but you've got that great curried lentil stew just a waitin' to be zapped in the microwave, and it means I don't have to wait in line at the damned drive-thru!

goal06082021

17 lb in 80 days is pretty fast. Consider slowing down - redo the guided setup and aim to lose 1lb or even 0.5lb per week, and do that for a while.

Or opt to maintain your current weight for a bit, perhaps a month or two to get through the holidays. Maybe three, if you know your weak point is about the 12-week mark. Then, go back and reset your goal to lose 1lb per week come February or so. There's no law that says you HAVE to lose it all in one go. Maintaining your weight is the eventual goal, so there's no harm in practicing, right?

AnnPT77

Good answers above! I endorse the ideas about doing exercise you find fun; eating in ways that balance goals of calories, nutrition, tastiness, practicality, not some "purist" kind of thing. Well-rounded nutrition, most days, on average, is important for health.

"Eating clean" has so many definitions that I'm not even sure what you mean, but I've seen people who flag-waved about "clean eating" but didn't get adequate nutrients across the board, and people who got reasonable nutrition eating a fair fraction of quite highly processed foods. Balance matters.

Sooner or later, sustainability needs to be a consideration. If someone (like me) has a tendency to over-indulge and gain, then it doesn't make sense to treat weight loss entirely as a project with an end date, after which things "go back to normal". That's the recipe for yo-yo-ing.

Weight management, for me, is going to be a lifelong endeavor, if I want to stay at a healthy weight. Also, motivation - to say the least - is not my long suit. To me, that implies that somewhere during weight loss, one ought to experiment, find habits that are easy to sustain long term, and that will not only get one to a healthy weight, but keep one there. The whole of weight loss needn't be framed that way, but if it doesn't happen somewhere during loss, maintenance will be harder, less assured.

Personally, when I was losing, I had a rule that I wasn't going to do anything to lose weight that I wasn't willing to continue long term in order to stay at a healthy weight permanently, except for a sensibly moderate calorie deficit. Other than a few failed experiments (things I thought would be sustainable, turned out not to be 😆), that worked pretty well. When I got to goal weight, I added back a few calories daily to stop losing, but didn't need to make any other changes in eating/activity. That was over 6 years ago, and I'm still at a healthy weight, after around 30 previous years of overweight/obesity, so I'm feeling pretty good about how that strategy worked for me. YMMV, of course, because we're all individuals.

Best wishes!

cwolfman13

What is "clean eating" to you? Often this is overly restrictive and a very myopic view of overall nutrition. Not something that is typically sustainable long term. What do you do at the gym? Do you need to go to the gym to exercise? Do you like the gym? I go to the gym twice per week to lift and that's pretty much it unless I go in for a spin class or yoga class. The gym is not my favorite place in the world to be and most of my exercise is done outdoors, road cycling and mountain biking and walking and occasionally hiking. I enjoy it as it is largely active recreation rather than a "workout". Ultimately you need to make things sustainable.

GarryA1987

Sorry for the late reply. We have a poorly toddler at the moment and upon reflection, I wonder if the long, sleepless weekend was part of my problem!

Thank you so much for the replies. I would love to reply to you all individually, however I will try to address some of the common questions:

"Clean eating" - So I am not restricting myself completely, I am doing more of a 90/10 split. 90% I eat healthy foods (I suffer from IBS so eating clean is a better way of life anyway) and then other 10% I have a cheat meal on a Friday night (normally a wrap from the kebab shop) which hasn't had any detrimental impact. I have cut out sugars, white bread, and I eat my carbs in the morning after my workout.

"A bit about me" - I started my journey at 224lbs with my daily consumption set at 2500. Currently My MFP calories are set at 2224 with a macro split of Carbs 20% / Fat 45% / Protein 35% (which is around 196g of protein). I currently weight 207lbs so I am close to the 1lb of protein per pound of body weight. I notice a few of you say that I was losing at a fast rate... that wasn't my intention as I thought my calories were at a sensible target. Which brings me onto exercise...

"Gym / Exercise" - This has been my favourite part of the journey, but maybe I have been overdoing it? I set myself the goal of burning at least 400 calories every time I am down the gym and a good week looks like the below (I will take the data directly from my tracker):

Monday - Weights - Cross trainer (18mins / 149kcal) with 1 hour of full body (316kcal)
Tuesday - Cardio Day - Treadmill (4 miles of fast walking / 402kcal)
Wednesday - Weights - Cross trainer (18mins / 134kcal) with 1 hour of full body (246kcal)
Thursday - Cardio Day - Cross trainer (65 mins / 501kcal) then treadmill (34 mins / 183kcals)
Friday - Weights - Cross trainer (18mins / 164kcal) with 1 hour of full body (282kcal)
Saturday - Rest
Sunday - Rest

That week I burned 4179 calories through just exercise. I loved every minute of it. Maybe I am going too hard on the exercise? Some days I eat the calories burned, some days I don't.

---

I have decided that this week I will do a refeed and a week away from the gym. I will pick it back up next week and focus on repairing muscles, tendons and my mental health.

I hope that cleared up a few things and I just want to thank you all again for taking the time to help Any further questions or points I will address as quickly as I can.

snowflake954

Thanks for checking in. Best of luck.

cmriverside

Well if you've been at that low carb thing from the start, it's common to drop a lot of weight in the beginning and then it slows way down. Carbs will normally account for a big amount of water retention. If you go back to your "regular" diet this next week, expect a big tick UP on the scale if you're adding back carbs in quantity.


The other thing is that plateaus happen. Lack of sleep is definitely a factor! Enjoy your week off, come back with renewed focus and I hope Mini Garry feels better quickly.

GarryA1987

cmriverside wrote: »

Well if you've been at that low carb thing from the start, it's common to drop a lot of weight in the beginning and then it slows way down. Carbs will normally account for a big amount of water retention. If you go back to your "regular" diet this next week, expect a big tick UP on the scale if you're adding back carbs in quantity.


The other thing is that plateaus happen. Lack of sleep is definitely a factor! Enjoy your week off, come back with renewed focus and I hope Mini Garry feels better quickly.

My tolerance to carbs is quite low, so a lower carb diet works for me. I have tried keto in the past but its not sustainable. I tend to eat more carbs the night before my weight sessions to fuel it. I watch the scale fluctuate as I increase carbs, but as long as I am in a deficit, the scales do move down. I am not worried about the scale, I am more invested in my mental health and wellbeing.

I will probably do 70/30 this week and enjoy some different foods but remain at a deficit. Little Garry is on the mend and next week I will continue to smash it 💪

mirianyusm

GarryA1987 wrote: »

cmriverside wrote: »

Well if you've been at that low carb thing from the start, it's common to drop a lot of weight in the beginning and then it slows way down. Carbs will normally account for a big amount of water retention. If you go back to your "regular" diet this next week, expect a big tick UP on the scale if you're adding back carbs in quantity.


The other thing is that plateaus happen. Lack of sleep is definitely a factor! Enjoy your week off, come back with renewed focus and I hope Mini Garry feels better quickly.

My tolerance to carbs is quite low, so a lower carb diet works for me. I have tried keto in the past but its not sustainable. I tend to eat more carbs the night before my weight sessions to fuel it. I watch the scale fluctuate as I increase carbs, but as long as I am in a deficit, the scales do move down. I am not worried about the scale, I am more invested in my mental health and wellbeing.

I will probably do 70/30 this week and enjoy some different foods but remain at a deficit. Little Garry is on the mend and next week I will continue to smash it 💪

Good luck!