How do you do it, especially those who have lost so much

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Replies

  • SouperDuck
    SouperDuck Posts: 57 Member
    I had to learn what it meant to actually be hungry. Being hungry and not being full are two different things.

    I also had to learn the difference between hunger and thirst. All my body signals were scrambled.

    Now, my attitude about food is different. It is fuel, not pleasure.

    I am a chef and I make food for people to enjoy. I know that I can't eat like that anymore, it will kill me.

    Now, I understand what a portion should be, how it feels to eat the right amount, how eating until being sick isn't "full" and that it is more fun to be able to do stuff.
  • farmers_daughter
    farmers_daughter Posts: 1,632 Member
    All you people who say you are not in the "lost so much" or dont know if you qualify.

    Stop.

    and remember the fact that there people who would GIVE EVERYTHING to accomplish what you've accomplished.

    So shut your pie holes and stop taking yourselves for granted!!!

    I say that with LOVE!!! :flowerforyou: <- and no that's not a "smarta$$" flower either
  • Mgregory723
    Mgregory723 Posts: 529 Member
    I don't think I'm in the 'lost so much' category... yet... but I can relate to how you're feeling. I need to remind myself on a daily (hourly..., minutely..., secondly!) basis why I want to lose weight/get healthy. Lots of the time I listen to myself... Sometimes I don't. What others say may help inspire me and keep me going or get me back on track, but it's me who has to do the hard work of making good choices. And it is hard. But the more often I listen to my own good advice and the good advice of others, the better results I see and the better I feel. And that helps me to persevere.

    Lessons I'm constantly reminding myself of in my daily challenge of getting healthier (and hopefully thinner):

    ~ It's a damned slow process. But I didn't get this way overnight so shouldn't expect to undo it all over night. 1-2lbs per week is a reasonable expectation for me. If that means I only lose 5lbs in a month, I have to be okay with that, and pleased with my achievements. There is no such things as a magic pill.

    ~ Whatever I do has to be sustainable forever. If I 'diet' by cutting all sugar, or all baked goods, or if I live on just white and green foods, I will lose weight. But as soon as I re-introduce the no-no foods, I'll gain the weight back. And probably a few extra lbs too as my body's way of saying "Take that for depriving me!". My new normal way of eating (reasonable portion sizes, lots of water, much lower amounts of 'junk food', a lot more healthy foods, within a specific daily calorie limit) has to be something I can do for the rest of my life.

    ~ Tracking my food and exercise makes me a lot more aware of what (and how much) I'm eating. It also makes me think twice about how I'm going to spend my calories. Yes, I think of my daily allotment like an account with limited funds in it that I need to make last for the whole day! Being accurate is very important. Overdrafts are costly (to my goals and my self esteem). For me, no foods are off limits, but if my goal is to be healthier, I will reach that faster by making better food choices. I'm more likely to make bad choices on days I don't track my food and exercise (or more likely to not track if I eat poorly or don't exercise). So tracking is important.

    ~ While weight loss is 90% about what I eat, exercise will help make me feel better. And if I feel better, I'm more likely to make better choices. But, again, the activity I do has to be something I enjoy, something I can do easily. Otherwise it's too easy to talk myself out of it. It's nice to exercise with a friend, but I can't rely on friends for my motivation. I have to motivate me and make a commitment to myself in order to reach my goals. If I can help friends at the same time, yeh!

    ~ While I'm entitled to have a stern word with myself when I mess up, I can't beat myself up and use it as an excuse to give up. I have to do my best to learn from my mistakes and then put them behind me and start over again.

    Persevering to achieve a weight loss goal is difficult because it's hard work. Change is almost always hard. Even change for the better. But when that hard work starts to pay off, and your changes are paying dividends, it's sooo worth it!

    Amazing advise to the OP!! ~and it was the kick in *kitten* I needed today! Thank you :flowerforyou:
  • jenn26point2
    jenn26point2 Posts: 429 Member
    I read a LOT about proper nutrition and why we should eat certain foods and avoid others. What I learned through my reading I put into practice and the pounds fell off. What books did I read?

    The Primal Blueprint by Mark Sisson
    Wheat Belly by Dr. William Davis (he's a cardiologist)
    Primal Body, Primal Mind by Nora Degaudas
    It Starts with Food by Melissa and Dallas Hartwig
    The Paleo Solution by Robb Wolf
    The Art and Science of Low Carb Living by Dr. Volek and Dr. Phinney (I am not low carb anymore, but it opened my eyes to how our bodies process carbs)

    The most important thing that has helped me to lose my weight is my willingness to learn new things and accept new ideas. I started to question everything I thought I knew about weight loss and once I started questioning, I started to do things differently than what I'd done before and the pounds fell off. Literally... In 6 months, I lost 37 lbs. It's not a ball buster speed at just over a pound a week average, but there were weeks where I lost 5 lbs and weeks where I lost nothing. There were also times when I fell off the wagon and gained 5 lbs back here and there. But when I was applying what I had learned, the pounds literally fell off. I didn't start working out until recently. And, my weight loss has stalled, so I believe the concept of chronic cardio and why it's not helping me to meet my goals.

    Anyhow, once you read and learn and start to understand the science behind how our bodies work, it's easier to avoid those foods that don't help you reach your goals. And surprisingly, you may find you're actually allergic to some foods. I learned I am intolerant of wheat (not celiac, but my body definitely does not like it) and mildly allergic to dairy.

    It's all a learning curve. Learn all you can and apply what you learn.

    PS, prior to reading the above books and applying what they say, I couldn't lose weight to save my life. I would yo yo the same 12 pounds over and over and over again - this went on for YEARS! Since reading the Primal Blueprint in March 2012, I've lost 50 lbs. It works and it's sustainable.

    Whatever path you choose, good luck and keep striving for knowledge. You'll find your secret.
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  • UpEarly
    UpEarly Posts: 2,555 Member
    Don't think of it as starting a program, think of it as making a permanent change to how you care for your body and your health. I didn't 'diet' at all - just moved more and ate less. Everything else took care of itself. I lost 66 pounds and have been maintaining that loss for going on two years now.
  • contingencyplan
    contingencyplan Posts: 3,639 Member
    When you realize how much being overweight is limiting your ability to live life and do the things you want to do, it'll happen on its own. For me, that moment came when I finally did something I had been wanting to do for ten years: I bought a motorcycle. But being obese complicated learning to ride, and the selection of safety gear available in my size was sparse. If I wanted to do it right, I had to lose weight.

    The first thing to understand is this:

    You can eat whatever you want as long as you prepare it yourself from scratch and employ the use of healthier, lower-calorie ingredients whenever possible. I lost the bulk of my 135 lbs while living off of a diet that included eating 1/4 lb cheeseburgers and burritos everyday.

    Avoid ready-made meals whenever possible because it is very difficult to gauge calorie content and nutrition labels are seldom accurate in those cases.

    Drink mainly water. Liquid calories can make it hard to accurately monitor calorie content.

    Do not adopt any drastic diet or exercise plan that promises huge results in a matter of a couple weeks/months. You'll burn yourself out. Slow and steady wins the race. Save those for later.
  • ShannonMpls
    ShannonMpls Posts: 1,936 Member
    It is much easier being fat, eating whatever you want and being lazy.

    I think it's about realizing that it's *not* easier being fat. It's hard, it's sad, it's frustrating. It leads you to dislike yourself. It can strip fun out of your life. Speaking for myself only, I avoided social events, hated shopping, didn't have the energy to enjoy my life and have fun with my family. I lived knowing that any day my health could fail, that my weight might catch up to me. I avoided going to the doctor to avoid stepping on the scale, so who knew when I'd develop diabetes or high blood pressure.

    Losing weight was easy compared to all of that.

    I made an inviolable deal with myself in the beginning: You will not quit until you've lost 40 pounds. I figured that would only take 4-5 months and I know I could do that. If I still decided being fat was preferable to counting calories and exercising, then I could quit. But not a day before 40 pounds gone.

    It worked. By the time I'd lost 40 pounds, there was no chance I was quitting. I had more energy. I felt great. People complimented me. I was doing things in the gym I never dreamed possible. I was actually *happy*.

    Other tips:

    - Log on here every day. No exceptions. Even if you're not logging your food, log on here as a reminder that you are living a different life.

    - Develop a support system. I still, 805 days later, love the cheers from friends when I log my exercise.

    - Set tiny goals. If you have a lot to lose, seeing a ticker with 100 pounds to go is a buzzkill. I set my goal for that 40 pounds when I first started, then gradually changed my target weight whenever I hit a new goal. 20 pound increments worked well. I didn't think I could lose 120 pounds, but I knew I could lose 20 pounds 5 times :)

    - Lose the all or nothing approach. Lose it NOW. So you slip up and eat chocolate for breakfast? Don't you dare let that be an excuse to binge all day and start new tomorrow. Log it, adjust your day, and move FORWARD. You have a family reunion and want to enjoy the food? FINE. Enjoy that one meal, or one day, but don't let it turn into two days. That has a tendency to turn into three, a week, a month. You are in charge, promise.

    - Accept that weight fluctuates naturally. Accept that your hard work, your perfect week, will not always show up on the scale when you want it. But know this: hard work is always rewarded. You might not see it this week, but next week will be killer. I dealt with this by tracking my weekly losses over the long-term. Then if I worked my tail off and only lost .5 pounds, I could look back and see that my daily average was more than 2 pounds a week still, that my losses always show up, but they might take some time. If you enjoy a meal out and weigh yourself the next day, you might see a 4-5 pound gain, but remember that it's not fat, or better yet, don't weigh yourself for a few days.

    - Exercise. I know you'll read all kinds of BS here about how exercise isn't necessary to weight loss, but in my opinion, if you truly want to change your life, it requires activity. Do what you enjoy...walking, weights, group classes. Just move. It will change your relationship with your body which will, in turn, change your relationship with food. Discovering my inner athlete is one of the best things that has ever happened to me, and I mean that seriously.

    - Don't make any changes you're not willing to keep for a lifetime. For example: Don't exercise two hours a day unless you plan to do that forever. Don't cut carbs unless you're willing to live a life without cake and french fries (I'm not!). Don't restrict to 900 calories unless you'll be happy on celery and rice cakes forever. A series of small, permanent changes will make all the difference.

    - Don't make the mistake of thinking that life that doesn't begin till you hit goal weight. I remember thinking, "I won't hit my goal weight for a year and a half! That is so long. Why even bother." What a silly thought. The entire journey to lose weight was a reward in itself. Along the way I had so much *fun* that hitting goal weight was fairly anticlimactic! I didn't feel like seeing that number on the scale was the end goal anymore, because it wasn't....the new life I had created for myself, THAT was the goal. It took 15 months, but you know what? Those 15 months would have passed regardless.

    The week I started, I hung up a phrase on my computer at work:
    "A year from now you will wish you had started today."

    That phrase still hung there a year from my start date, except I was 120 pounds lighter.

    Time passes whether we do something with it or not. I chose to do something. I hope you do too.

    Good luck :)
  • pittdan77
    pittdan77 Posts: 98 Member
    It's not easy. I've "failed" more times than I care to imagine. Honestly, I'm back on day 2 of a 3 day F it mode. The scale started to stick and the weight loss slowed down and I got discouraged. It happens. All that matters is you get back up and start working at it again. The good thing about messing up is that you can fix the problem. Yes, you may from time to time say screw it and gain a pound or 2, but you can also lose that weight again and learn from it.


    THIS!
  • akp4Him
    akp4Him Posts: 227
    What started my weight loss journey was a friend's comment about herself. She said, "I just want my clothes to fit better." I went home and thought about that. My "fat" clothes were starting to become tight. I thought I could manage losing a few pounds so that my clothes fit better. So I started...I stuck with it for a month...then I started to notice that my fat clothes didn't fit better...they were almost too loose. And that is all it took. I've lost 90 pounds. You CAN do it!!! Just do it one step at a time!!
  • "One day of diet and exercise won't take the weight off...in the same respect that it didn't take one day to put it on."

    Did you wake up one day and you were overweight? Nope. It will take just as long, if not longer, to take it off, and a lot more work! It will all be worth it if you stick with it. I found once I started seeing results and my body change it was the biggest motivator for me.

    Good luck!
  • swat1948
    swat1948 Posts: 302 Member
    Well in my case, I just kept plugging away at it. Over time it becomes a habit and I do take breaks at time for a day or two but I get right back on the horse later.
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,021 Member
    It is much easier being fat, eating whatever you want and being lazy. I need a kick in the *kitten*. :)

    Trust me when I say you are wrong about this. It may be easier to eat whatever you want and never work out than to learn to control your behavior, but being fit and healthy and not giving food so much control over you is far, FAR easier than hating your body and letting food dictate how you feel. Keep going. You don't have to get there tomorrow. I'm going on 4 years now. I PROMISE you will not regret a single second of the effort you put toward this.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    Why is it that starting a program and actually sticking with it can be so difficult? If you want something, such as losing weight, you would think that you would just be able to start a program and stick with it. Not me, I get annoyed with myself, discouraged, and disgusted. It is much easier being fat, eating whatever you want and being lazy. I need a kick in the *kitten*. :)

    I'm not good at sticking to a program either. This is why I follow IIFYM. I just make sure to get enough protein and fats each day and stay under my calorie goal. It makes it a lot easier. And now, after doing this over a year, I have an excellent idea of how much to eat and no longer pre-plan anything.
  • lacroyx
    lacroyx Posts: 5,754 Member
    You take it a day at a time. Learning to accept you will have bad days and that's ok. Gradually changing your habits until they become 2nd nature. Never giving up.
  • All I know is if it were easy we would all be thin and fit! What has helped me is having friends here at MFP that have access to my food diaries. I log everything for good and bad. Friends have made me accountable for what I am doing and are willing to call me out when eating snickers bars for breakfast was not the best choice I could have made.

    I have heard people say over and over I want it badly, but I just can not do the right thing. I think that is not true, you may want it, but not for the right reasons. It took one moment in my life that made me realize what and why I wanted it then I was ready to change things for the better, it is not easy, and it never seems to get easier. But it is worth it
  • peanutbutterz
    peanutbutterz Posts: 74 Member
    I don't think I'm in the 'lost so much' category... yet... but I can relate to how you're feeling. I need to remind myself on a daily (hourly..., minutely..., secondly!) basis why I want to lose weight/get healthy. Lots of the time I listen to myself... Sometimes I don't. What others say may help inspire me and keep me going or get me back on track, but it's me who has to do the hard work of making good choices. And it is hard. But the more often I listen to my own good advice and the good advice of others, the better results I see and the better I feel. And that helps me to persevere.

    Lessons I'm constantly reminding myself of in my daily challenge of getting healthier (and hopefully thinner):

    ~ It's a damned slow process. But I didn't get this way overnight so shouldn't expect to undo it all over night. 1-2lbs per week is a reasonable expectation for me. If that means I only lose 5lbs in a month, I have to be okay with that, and pleased with my achievements. There is no such things as a magic pill.

    ~ Whatever I do has to be sustainable forever. If I 'diet' by cutting all sugar, or all baked goods, or if I live on just white and green foods, I will lose weight. But as soon as I re-introduce the no-no foods, I'll gain the weight back. And probably a few extra lbs too as my body's way of saying "Take that for depriving me!". My new normal way of eating (reasonable portion sizes, lots of water, much lower amounts of 'junk food', a lot more healthy foods, within a specific daily calorie limit) has to be something I can do for the rest of my life.

    ~ Tracking my food and exercise makes me a lot more aware of what (and how much) I'm eating. It also makes me think twice about how I'm going to spend my calories. Yes, I think of my daily allotment like an account with limited funds in it that I need to make last for the whole day! Being accurate is very important. Overdrafts are costly (to my goals and my self esteem). For me, no foods are off limits, but if my goal is to be healthier, I will reach that faster by making better food choices. I'm more likely to make bad choices on days I don't track my food and exercise (or more likely to not track if I eat poorly or don't exercise). So tracking is important.

    ~ While weight loss is 90% about what I eat, exercise will help make me feel better. And if I feel better, I'm more likely to make better choices. But, again, the activity I do has to be something I enjoy, something I can do easily. Otherwise it's too easy to talk myself out of it. It's nice to exercise with a friend, but I can't rely on friends for my motivation. I have to motivate me and make a commitment to myself in order to reach my goals. If I can help friends at the same time, yeh!

    ~ While I'm entitled to have a stern word with myself when I mess up, I can't beat myself up and use it as an excuse to give up. I have to do my best to learn from my mistakes and then put them behind me and start over again.

    Persevering to achieve a weight loss goal is difficult because it's hard work. Change is almost always hard. Even change for the better. But when that hard work starts to pay off, and your changes are paying dividends, it's sooo worth it!

    What wonderful advice. You are so encouraging!!!
  • megalin9
    megalin9 Posts: 771 Member
    Since you asked...

    1. I want it more than anything else in the world I want for myself, and I want it for myself alone.
    2. I don't allow myself ANY excuses.
    3. I made a DECISION to get fit, and I am COMMITTED to my fitness like I am committed to my marriage.
    4. I have a picture in my head of what I want to look like, and she is athletic, strong, and HOT!
    5. I made sacrifices. I looked at my lifestyle and tweeked or completely eliminated things that I didn't need to spend time and energy on.
    6. I am almost always motivated, but when I'm not, my will-power takes over. "Man, I really regret going to the gym today," said no one ever!
    7. I educated myself on the basics of calories in vs. calories out (TDEE, BMR, deficit, etc.) and learned how to eat: cooking, weighing and measuring my food, packing my lunch every day, counting calories, paying attention to macros (protein, fats, carbs), etc. I use this website religiously to log my food and work-outs.
    8. I set goals, specifically MINI goals so that I won't set myself up for failure. Meeting goals is addictive, and it's hard to quit on yourself when you're working towards something specific.
    9. I lift heavy 3X/week and do some form of cardio 2X/week or more if I want to. I play sports for fun.
    10. I made changes that I could live with the rest of my life, and I made them SLOWLY - one thing at a time.
  • JoelleAnn78
    JoelleAnn78 Posts: 1,492 Member
    Open your diary and let the people with success give you some words of advice.

    If someone says, "You only net 800 calories today? You need to eat more!" and they've lost 100# -- you might need to consider their advice. They've figured out the key to losing. If someone who's lost 20 pounds and maintained for 6 months notices a pattern in your eating that could cause you issues in the future, listen to them. They've figured out the key to maintenance. It's never a personal attack if it comes from your FL - the only people you should have on your FL are people who encourage you and want the same success for you that they've achieved for themselves (or those looking for the same support as yourself.)

    And, I can personally add, for me there is no hope for long term success without exercise. There just isn't. I can lose weight in the beginning with diet changes only. But, I find, for myself, I cannot continue to lose or even maintain without moving my body.

    ETA: I didn't check - maybe your diary is already open. :smile:
  • Why is it that starting a program and actually sticking with it can be so difficult? If you want something, such as losing weight, you would think that you would just be able to start a program and stick with it. Not me, I get annoyed with myself, discouraged, and disgusted. It is much easier being fat, eating whatever you want and being lazy. I need a kick in the *kitten*. :)

    I think you've answered your own question. You prefer easy and lazy.

    So do I. I just prefer other things more. Like watching my son grow into adulthood. And being able to have interesting stories to tell people other than "I just sat at home watching Friends reruns".

    I want to look back on my life and see a life full of family, friends, and long stories of great adventures.
  • VeganAmandaJ
    VeganAmandaJ Posts: 234 Member
    I have a lot to say and I'm sure others have said already but I don't have time right now, ahh! Also, I haven't lost "so much" but I've been at it for 6 months and will continue this for life. I will be back!
  • annakow
    annakow Posts: 385 Member
    You need to be mentally ready to lose weight and just change your life. That's all, the rest will follow. It's change for ever because you will always have to watch calories and workout.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    Much change is born of pain. Right now, eating whatever you want and being lazy isn't causing your enough discomfort. As you said. "It is much easier being fat". When it becomes more difficult, physically, emotionally and intellectually, to be fat than it does to make the change to become healthier, you will do it. But not until then.
  • Is it really easier being fat? Don't lie to yourself.
  • supplemama
    supplemama Posts: 1,956 Member
    Why is it that starting a program and actually sticking with it can be so difficult? If you want something, such as losing weight, you would think that you would just be able to start a program and stick with it. Not me, I get annoyed with myself, discouraged, and disgusted. It is much easier being fat, eating whatever you want and being lazy. I need a kick in the *kitten*. :)

    Quit doing the 'program' and just start eating less and moving more.

    I don't diet. I eat what I want. I SHOULD eat a bit healthier but I don't. I'd probably be at my goal weight by now if I ate better (started losing weight Jan. 2012). I will work on that. In the meantime, I make sure I'm at or under my calorie goal each day and I MOVE every day.
  • Mcgrawhaha
    Mcgrawhaha Posts: 1,596 Member
    Why is it that starting a program and actually sticking with it can be so difficult? If you want something, such as losing weight, you would think that you would just be able to start a program and stick with it. Not me, I get annoyed with myself, discouraged, and disgusted. It is much easier being fat, eating whatever you want and being lazy. I need a kick in the *kitten*. :)

    i think its just as hard as when someone quits smoking. it takes a few tries before it sets in, and it only works when you absolutely positivly want it, 120%... until your urge to be fit and healthy is stronger than your urge to continue your current habits, then you will usually start a plan and give up just weeks in. i think for many of us, that strong urge may finally be triggered by a "omg" picture or moment... for me, i saw a picture... and i was humiliated! at 5 foot 10 and 246 pounds, i thought i looked good, and that i only needed to lose about 30 pounds... then i saw "the picture"... yeah right... i needed to lose 100 pounds!

    hopefully your fully committed, and ready to finish what you start! just stay determined, stay motivated, and remember why you are doing what your doing... that your goal is to look good, feel good, and live a longer healthier life with those you love! you can definately reach your goals, and in a reasonable amount of time, too... as long as you staty committed!
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    I became more uncomfortable with being overweight than I was with the changes I'd have to make to succeed.

    I also think that realizing that I wouldn't have to cut out foods I love was crucial. If I'd come into this thinking that to be successful I had to give up bread or never eat dessert I would have just stayed fat. It was really freeing to learn that I could eat whatever foods I wanted and still lose weight.

    I second the advice to make one change at a time as well. I think sometimes when people try to make a complete 180 they burn out quickly because they're trying to change everything at once and it's just too much. Don't think of it as something you're doing to lose weight. Think of it as "this is how I live my life now."
  • clbortiz
    clbortiz Posts: 98 Member
    I didn't try to make all the changes in one day. I started with one change, then added others as I went.
    This is what I did too. The first thing I did was cut out eating out. Between lunch and dinner I would easily eat out 6 or more times a week.
    After a few weeks I started cooking more from scratch and eating less processed frozen dinners etc. On the weekend I cook several meals and freeze in individual containers for ease in packing lunches or grabbing a quick dinner.
    Next I started replacing snacks with healthier choices like fruits and veggies with hummus etc.
    Then, I started walking a few times a week. Then about 3-4 months in I started a couch to 5k program to up my exercise.
    This week I started a weight lifting program with a trainer to up the ante so to speak.
    For me, trying to change it all at once is overwhelming. Making one change every few weeks...very doable.
  • Zomoniac
    Zomoniac Posts: 1,169 Member
    Why is it that starting a program and actually sticking with it can be so difficult?

    It's as difficult as you choose to let it be.
    If you want something, such as losing weight, you would think that you would just be able to start a program and stick with it.

    You can. You're choosing not to. Want it more.
  • 4daluvof_candice
    4daluvof_candice Posts: 483 Member
    :smile: TRACK, TRACK, TRACK!!!!! Even though I might fall off :ohwell: some days with this I have discovered, lol, that when I track 7 days a week the weight comes off.
    Good Luck!!!!:bigsmile: