The Revolving Diet Door.
Quiltingforyou
Posts: 18 Member
All my life " I'm currently 66 yo" I have started on if not a weekly basis then an annual basis. Losing 10-20 pounds each time just to regain it back. What do you do, what have you done to successfully change your eating lifestyle and maintain your weight loss to be a healthier you? Day 1 of a new life changing healthier me.
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Replies
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I have to stay on MFP and log every day. I also weigh every day. 3 years ago I gained back 20 lbs after a bad flu, then I decided to weigh every day. That way this much weight could not get away from me, I see where I stand.6
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Determine to create new habits and resolve to stick to them.
Find ways to make those habits stick.
I was easily downing a pound or two of chocolate per day, with other sugary or carby treats on top of that.
I determined to stop eating sugar, and had to find ways to incorporate that decision and then strengthen my resolve.
I began eating fruit. (Ewwwww….fruit. That was, like, a vegetable, right? Didn’t like those either.) after a few weeks, fruit began to taste so incredibly sweet it almost hurt. You start to realize that chemical orange and strawberry flavors like Starbursts and Skittles (a personal favorite) pale in comparison to the depth and flavor of the real thing.
I took a second look at sugar free products and found ways to incorporate them. (I was always of the hair-on-fire school of “Oh, God! I will die of cancer from sugar free chemicals!!!”. Um, No. I was far more likely to die from myriad complications of the extra hundred pounds I was toting around.) There’s some really tasty sugar free products out there.
Then I learned that sugar actually wasn’t “evil”. No food is evil. It’s my attitude and unfettered consumption of them that was the evil. There’s a reason gluttony is one of the seven deadly sins. I was literally eating myself to death.
Once I learned that, I began incorporating a little bit of sugar back into my calories-a small piece of chocolate or marzipan, a lovely bakery cookie or pastel de nata tart from my favorite grocery.
I also tried to change my brain. I tried to visualize what I would look like after the weight was gone. How my life might change. How my health would improve.
One unexpected result was that horrible, horrible GERD was gone within a month. * Cue the heavenly choir*
One of my favorite yoga instructors says that “if you visualize the result and make the effort, you may not be able to do it at that moment, but you’ll receive many of the same benefits, and eventually you may achieve the result you want”. He’s usually talking about arm balances, but I realized it applies to life, too.
I hung a skinny dress in the closet, pictured myself wearing it, and made a point of talking to it (yeah, I talked to a freaking piece of cloth) and stroking it every single morning.
And my favorite piece of advice comes from my husband. Instead of crying because you haven’t achieved perfection, accept and appreciate what you have achieved because “it’s better than it was before”.
So instead of crying because you “only” lost 10-20, be grateful for that loss because it IS better than it was before. And then start eating that elephant one bite, or ten more pounds, at a time.14 -
I have to log onto MFP every day, I also weigh myself everyday (whilst keeping in mind fluctuations due to fluid retention) I do 2 fast days of 500 per week, however I don't feel guilty if I don't do them but I don't lose as much weight.. I will continue to do 1 fast day per week once I'm at my target weight, and 2 if I gain weight. Other than that I eat what I want but make sure I stay within my calorie and macros , I do include plenty of veg on my plate too. It works for me because it doesn't feel like a diet really and I've lost over 4 stone in a year. I also exercise everyday.. it's not much though, I do 30 mins on a rowing machine and a 40 min walk, if I don't do this I don't lose weight. Prior to this I have tried every diet under the sun, I at one point lived on 500ckal a day just eating lean meat and veg.. because it was working, short term,, If I ate anything other than that I gained it back. I tried Slimming World loads of times and Weight Watchers, which didn't work for me (I know people who it has though)2
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springlering62 wrote: »Determine to create new habits and resolve to stick to them.
Find ways to make those habits stick.
I was easily downing a pound or two of chocolate per day, with other sugary or carby treats on top of that.
I determined to stop eating sugar, and had to find ways to incorporate that decision and then strengthen my resolve.
I began eating fruit. (Ewwwww….fruit. That was, like, a vegetable, right? Didn’t like those either.) after a few weeks, fruit began to taste so incredibly sweet it almost hurt. You start to realize that chemical orange and strawberry flavors like Starbursts and Skittles (a personal favorite) pale in comparison to the depth and flavor of the real thing.
I took a second look at sugar free products and found ways to incorporate them. (I was always of the hair-on-fire school of “Oh, God! I will die of cancer from sugar free chemicals!!!”. Um, No. I was far more likely to die from myriad complications of the extra hundred pounds I was toting around.) There’s some really tasty sugar free products out there.
Then I learned that sugar actually wasn’t “evil”. No food is evil. It’s my attitude and unfettered consumption of them that was the evil. There’s a reason gluttony is one of the seven deadly sins. I was literally eating myself to death.
Once I learned that, I began incorporating a little bit of sugar back into my calories-a small piece of chocolate or marzipan, a lovely bakery cookie or pastel de nata tart from my favorite grocery.
I also tried to change my brain. I tried to visualize what I would look like after the weight was gone. How my life might change. How my health would improve.
One unexpected result was that horrible, horrible GERD was gone within a month. * Cue the heavenly choir*
One of my favorite yoga instructors says that “if you visualize the result and make the effort, you may not be able to do it at that moment, but you’ll receive many of the same benefits, and eventually you may achieve the result you want”. He’s usually talking about arm balances, but I realized it applies to life, too.
I hung a skinny dress in the closet, pictured myself wearing it, and made a point of talking to it (yeah, I talked to a freaking piece of cloth) and stroking it every single morning.
And my favorite piece of advice comes from my husband. Instead of crying because you haven’t achieved perfection, accept and appreciate what you have achieved because “it’s better than it was before”.
So instead of crying because you “only” lost 10-20, be grateful for that loss because it IS better than it was before. And then start eating that elephant one bite, or ten more pounds, at a time.
I'm also 66, and have been here a long time. I think the above post sums it up very well. Also read the "most valued posts" because they will give you good, and correct, information. Wishing you the best of luck. You can better things.2 -
I went slowly.
First, I started logging my food just out of curiosity because someone told me I probably needed more protein. When I realized that, nope I definitely was not, I focused on getting enough calories.
Then, I decided to try logging ALL my food to see if I could stop GAINING weight/maintain - no deficit. I got used to logging and a ceiling on my calories.
After l was consistently getting enough calories, logging was a habit and I was used to a 'ceiling' on my calories, I started seeing places I could painlessly cut some calories. Mostly condiment stuff. So I decided to try a deficit. Left my calories set at maintenance, but aimed for 'eat less than' maintenance calories per mfp. Anything between 1200 (I'm a woman) and that maintenance number was a successful day.
I did eventually set myself to lose, once I was consistently and comfortably coming in under maintenance by a pretty good amount. As I felt better and slept better I experimented with new active hobbies and rolled those in -- and ate more because that's how it works.
Over 15-18 months or so I lost 65 pounds. I never cut out a food group. I never ate anything I didn't like. I just changed HOW I ate. I had to adjust how that happened frequently (there were times I ate every 2 hours and times I ate once a day). I never did exercise I didn't enjoy/find fun. I took a break and ate at maintenance for a week for every 10lbs I lost. \
Once I was down to about 20 to lose I started to reverse the process. I went back to set to maintain and 'eat anything up to maintenance is fair game'.
At 10 pounds from goal, I set my goal to be 'to no more than 250 calories under maintenance - Ie: 1/2 lb a week)
At goal now (125ish) I started (for me) focusing more on getting enough protein (and staying within calorie goal though that is habit now +/- about 150 calories).
SLOOOOW changes. It's not just about building new habits it's about losing old ones. And making it as easy as you can on leaving the old ones means you're more likely to get the new stuff ingrained.8 -
Learning to approach it with honesty and curiosity, not motivation driven by guilt and shame. Realize that your current situation is simply the balance of your current decisions, that’s all. You can control and adjust your decisions, and that’s easiest, most sustainably to do gradually.
I decided to start weighing myself and my food, logging as much as and accurately as I could with the goal of gathering data, not to stick to a limit. What foods sustained me best from meal to meal? What protein amounts staved off cravings and binges? What could I do to set myself up for success? When I ate over my target calories, why? What foods did I choose, were there patterns before or during? Things I could watch out for and structure differently? What signs of sabotage do I put out for myself? When I meal plan, which meals do I consistently ditch and order out instead- why the heck do I plan the meals I obviously dislike? Why do I plan foods I dislike? Why am I not planning in foods that I crave?
Like Springerling said, sustainable plans must be habit-based. I’ve found that I have to drop-off and add-back habits as life throws me curve balls, so I’ve stratified those habits accordingly, which are basic and non-negotiable, and which are stepped up again when life eases up.
Goals must be focused on the habits. You can control your habits, you can control what you *do.* You cannot control the outcome. You can chose to follow your meal plan and exercise plan to a T. You cannot control what the scale says. You cannot control your weight. Weight is a byproduct of the balance of your lifestyle, the balance of all your eating and fitness habits. Focus on your habits, one by one.3 -
When I meal plan, which meals do I consistently ditch and order out instead- why the heck do I plan the meals I obviously dislike? Why do I plan foods I dislike? Why am I not planning in foods that I crave?
OMG is this not the truth?!!!
For those days when I’ve planned “that” kind of meal or I just can’t cope for whatever reason, I have a short list of acceptable takeouts, all around or under 600 calories:
A gyro with a side of grilled veggies
A CookOut tray with a double burger, double onion rings and diet soda. (“Dry” fried onion rings are a fraction the calories of fries-not the greasy drippy kind of onion rings.)
A grilled mango chicken breast on a bed of spinach and mango salsa from the local Mexican restaurant (ask for bell pepper strips in lieu of chips to dip in salsa, too!)
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I get on the scale every single day, log everything that goes into my mouth and usually before I eat so I can see how much room there is to enjoy all the foods, and exercise daily even if its a leisurely 20 minute saunter (the person I often walk with was needing a hip replacement and could not walk quickly). Dinner menus are planned 2 weeks in advance to allow for balance of main protein and variety of meals.
Portion control for me was huge, realizing exactly how much I was eating, drinking or snacking and reining it in.
Nothing is forbidden, there are no 'cheat' foods or days, when its planned for I can eat pasta carbonara, or caesar salad, or fruitcake, or wine.
Made the decision to eat less, move more January 3 2021. As a then 65yo female, was tired of hauling around 236 pounds, knowing I was obese, not setting a good example as a parent and just unhappy with myself. It does take effort and commitment to let go (don't like the term 'losing' as I tend to find it again) of the weight. 50 pounds are gone. Day by day, sometimes hour by hour.3 -
Habits has been mentioned...but remember, behavior change can be difficult and it doesn't all have to happen at once....there are also things you can do to make it easier.
1) Start small. Little baby steps. For example, logging food consumption daily and weighing daily can be great habits to develop. However, you don't have to start with both or all meals. One week one, commit to doing one of those...weigh in daily or maybe commit to logging just breakfasts. Add a new "mini-habit" weekly.
2) Focus on healthy habits as a whole (for a whole lifestyle change) vs. just what you eat. For example, I do miracle morning and SAVERS (silence, affirmations, visualizations, exercise, reading, scribing)...again, not all have to be added all at once. HOWEVER, adding in things like gardening or knitting or reading or whatever fun "habit" that leads to a healthy lifestyle can aid in change overall.
3) Really focus on what your motivation is. Beyond the poundage, why do you want to lose weight? Does the way you are trying to lose weight meet with your values or can you do it in a way to meet with what you value? For example, if I am part of a family that utilizes meals as a way of connecting, anything surrounding meals could be difficult to implement or maintain unless I really look at the value and find a way to incorporate my value with my behavioral change means...I might have to see if "connecting" can happen in other ways or if I need to figure out simple solutions to make it happen in the current environment. In general, people moving towards what they value will have more long term motivation. I do a lot of ACT and MBSR, so I really try and live a values-focused life and look at whether or not my actions are reflective of my values. Some examples of values: connection, compassion, caring, fitness, excitement, honesty etc.
4) It's not all or nothing. Accept that EVERYONE is going to have off-days and/or days that they don't keep up with a habit or change. For example, I just gave myself a pass on Thanksgiving weekend...I didn't log (although I did weigh in) and just ate with family as I felt hungry. I didn't splurge, but I also didn't hold myself to the highest of standards...and I'm okay with that. I knew that I would get back on track on Monday. You can plan breaks and that's okay. Just be mindful of it.
5) I think the big thing is recognizing that no diet can be held forever and whatever changes you incorporate should be something you can accept going forward...if you can, than it's worth making that baby step.1 -
springlering62 wrote: »When I meal plan, which meals do I consistently ditch and order out instead- why the heck do I plan the meals I obviously dislike? Why do I plan foods I dislike? Why am I not planning in foods that I crave?
OMG is this not the truth?!!!
For those days when I’ve planned “that” kind of meal or I just can’t cope for whatever reason, I have a short list of acceptable takeouts, all around or under 600 calories:
A gyro with a side of grilled veggies
A CookOut tray with a double burger, double onion rings and diet soda. (“Dry” fried onion rings are a fraction the calories of fries-not the greasy drippy kind of onion rings.)
A grilled mango chicken breast on a bed of spinach and mango salsa from the local Mexican restaurant (ask for bell pepper strips in lieu of chips to dip in salsa, too!)
OMG!! YES YES YES!!! For so long I would meal plan and put something that I maybe didn't like and/or was too long to cook. Now I purposely plan for meals that vary in time length and I plan for the week, but allow for some flexibility, so that I can swap out meals instead of ordering out.0 -
Before the 20 Lbs I put on during COVID restrictions and have yet to take off, I maintained for a good 7 years. The difference between maintenance and losing weight really comes down to a handful of calories. You can't just go back to the way you did things before or the same thing will just keep happening. Maintenance gives a little more wiggle room for things, but it's not like you can go from strict dietary habits to a free for all.
I maintain the same regular exercise habits in maintenance as I do when I'm losing weight. I put a premium on quality nutrition in maintenance just as I do when losing weight...I don't really eat much differently...maintenance allows for an extra snack or two or serving or two of something, and that's about it. I still cook most of my meals at home in maintenance...I only eat out for lunch on Wednesdays at a little hole in the wall Teriyaki Chicken joint, and allow for one other meal out or takeout for the week...usually on the weekends...otherwise everything is prepared at home.
I think the biggest issue with the yo-yo effect is that many people see everything they're doing during weight loss as temporary and that when they cross the finish line, they can just go back to whatever. People tend to cease regular exercise and go back to prior eating habits. There needs to be a recognition that reaching some arbitrary goal weight isn't the finish line...it's the starting line and everything you've been doing to that point was just training for the real marathon ahead.4 -
Goals must be focused on the habits. You can control your habits, you can control what you *do.* You cannot control the outcome. You can chose to follow your meal plan and exercise plan to a T. You cannot control what the scale says. You cannot control your weight. Weight is a byproduct of the balance of your lifestyle, the balance of all your eating and fitness habits. Focus on your habits, one by one.
This is really really so important. While I agree with @springlering62 about gluttony being a deadly sin, I think for me anyway I had the double whammy: gluttony and laziness. So the virtues to fight those vices are temperance and diligence. Virtues are just good habits. So if you are swimming in vice, you need to start practicing some virtues! From what I understand - you don't get a diploma when you have a virtue. You never, "Oh I got this virtue" and then move on. It is a habit that needs to be practiced forever.
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I am a bit older than you and have had the same body/diet experience for most of my life. About ten years ago I did two things. I resolved not to diet and to begin eating in a way that helped me be happy--no guilt, no vast amounts of brain space, with kindness and compassion to me, myself and I! Turns out that meant I stopped overeating on a regular basis (see guilt above!). I also started to watch my body and found that alcohol and lots of sugar and fat made me feel yucky. And--whatever emotional numbing I achieved was short lived--and eventually turned into guilt. I do look better these days, no question. But, that's really the least of it.I share all this because you and I are both longtime warriors of the diet wars, and maybe this mindset can be useful to you, too?4
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Such great advice above in many posts above: Endorsed!
I'm also 66, now; but was 59 when I started losing weight (just over the line into class 1 obese) and joined MFP. I'd been overweight/obese for at least 30 years. I've been at a healthy weight for 6+ years since joining MFP, and losing 50+ pounds.
Two things made it happen, for me, I think:
1. Finally, I had to really mean it that I wanted to reach a healthy weight, and commit. A switch needed to flip in my head. I don't know how to make that happen. If I did, I'd bottle and sell it, get absurdly rich. For me, the trigger finally was health markers that wouldn't much improve with exercise, or changing what I ate - both of which I'd tried - and my doctor threatening statins. (I thought I'd already given up enough cognitive bandwidth to chemotherapy, and statins have a rep for cognitive side effects.)
2. I decided up front that I wasn't going to do anything to lose weight that I wasn't willing to continue permanently to stay at a healthy weight, except for a sensibly moderate calorie deficit for reasonable weight loss until I reached goal weight. When I got to goal, all I needed to do was gradually add calories to my day to stabilize weight, and all my weight-maintenance habits were already identified, practiced, and grooved in as part of my life.
Habits. And personalization of those habits to your unique individual preferences, strengths, limitations, and life circumstances. Practical, relatively easy habits.
One advantage that we have with age, I think, is that we know ourselves quite well, know what we like and hate, what we're good at and not so great at. We've learned that from achieving other big life goals via patient small actions over long time periods (education, career development, making a home, maybe raising a family, etc.). Weight management is just another goal to be figured out, a practical problem to be solved . . . not a set of sins to be expiated, or a referendum on our quality or value as a human being.
You have the "project planning and management" skills you need, and the self-knowledge. You have to find the way to flip the switch in your head and commit, then experiment to find your best methods. People here can and will help, but we can only suggest things for you to try, not tell you exactly how to do it.
Wishing you excellent results!1 -
At age 56 I joined Weight Watchers. Not a plug for them. Back then WW was just calorie counting dressed up to copyright protection.
But what I did there was start a food diary that I kept going for 5 yrs. A food diary is a thing to do. The only way not to do it is to decide not to. People tend to put everything into hitting their calorie target. But it’s practically impossible to never go over our numbers. Not only will poor plans, and loss of focus trip us up, simple math mistakes or misread NI will too. It took me awhile to learn that looking at calories in a package was useless without checking serving size.
By keeping my diary no matter what I was able to separate the process from the numbers. Weight loss is the byproduct of the process. Never quit the process. Messing up the numbers for a meal, a day or even a week is not failure. Those are problems to solve. Solve enough problems long enough and you will get to goal. Hope something here helps you. Good luck.4
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