My vent.

khk2010

I have worked really hard to lose weight and change my lifestyle and I want people to notice! I know I shouldn't care what other people think but I would like more validation. Positive feedback would help me stay on this healthier path.

This came up for me because I saw family yesterday. Big group gathering. I'm wearing a smaller size I haven't gotten into in about 6 years. I've lost 25 pounds. I'm in better shape from working out. I am eating healthy. No one notices or says anything.

I do have a some cheerleaders. My daughter has been great. Encouraging me and will tell me how great I look and how much more energetic I am. My husband also is supportive and validating. And I have one friend who will compliment me and notice when I've hit a new weight loss level.

Hitting 25 pounds lost is such a big mark for me. I thought I'd get some glowing feedback.

Ultimately I know this is about me and learning to validate and support myself. I am proud of this accomplishment. I am going to keep going. I know it is making a big difference in my health and well-being.

Thanks for listening.

kristinlough

I found that people started noticing enough to comment at about 35 pounds. I think they want to make *certain* you've lost weight before they complement you, for fear of calling you fat. Does that make sense?

But no matter what - Congratulations on 25 pounds!!! That's awesome!!! :happy:

MakeLifeBright

I know what you are going through. My family do not even believe I have lost weight.
People notice when we are "fat" but they say nothing when we start getting healthy.
Know you are doing a great job! We are proud of you here!! :flowerforyou:

glfprncs2

I just blogged about going it alone...it might be helpful...

www.personalsweatequity.blogspot.com

EKarma

Just keep going.. I really wouldn't let it bother you that bad.. You feel great, why would you let something like that get you down.. And you have a good support system! The closer I keep getting to my goal, the more my twin sis hates me.. That was so hard for me because she is my best friend.. I understand where she is coming from and I called her on her *kitten*.. And she stopped being Captain Bringdown. .. And I know that she really is happy for me, but she misses being the "skinny" sister.. Sometimes it's hard for people to be happy for other because they aren't happy with themselves..

Really, just depend on your support system because it's a lot harder when you don't have one.... But I just keep going *muwhahaha*

Kath15

Congratulations on losing 25lbs!! That is definitely no small feat. You've worked hard to get here so be proud of yourself. As far as other people noticing...weight is a very sensitive issue. Perhaps, they do notice but aren't quite sure and are afraid to bring it up. Seriously, a lot of people just don't want to 'go there'. I think that goes especially for men. And, let's face it..some people are envious when they see that you are losing weight so they don't even want to acknowledge it. Or, I hate to say it, some people may not be comfortable with your loss in weight because it makes them have to confront their own issues. Who knows...there could be a lot of things that play into here, but I am positive that people notice. I've lost almost 20lbs and I recently went to a family party and I wasn't sure if people would notice either. A couple of people acknowledged it, but no one else said anything and I'm fine with that. Ultimately, I know I'm losing weight and I can tell whenever I look in the mirror and put on clothes. So, keep on doing what you are doing. Feel good about yourself and what you have accomplished..and will continue to do. We are all proud of you!

Tashry

I know how discouraging it can be when people don't notice, or at least don't comment. I really do think people just worry about insulting - that we may get offended about the fact that they noticed we weighed more before rather than be happy about the fact that they think we look better now.
I'm glad that you have some supporters - it makes it that much easier to stay motivated.
Well done on the weight lost!!

Tashry

And, let's face it..some people are envious when they see that you are losing weight so they don't even want to acknowledge it. Or, I hate to say it, some people may not be comfortable with your loss in weight because it makes them have to confront their own issues.

And skinny people worry that is sort of a forbidden topic for them. When I was the skinny friend I worried about commenting on weight loss, like it would be rude to bring up the issue. I worried about offending someone, that they may feel like I am insulting them or being condescending. "Hey - keep it up and one day you can look like me!" (And no, obviously I would never say anything like that, I just worried that that was how it would come across) Foolish, yes, but at the time that was honestly how I felt.

khk2010

Thanks everyone for the support and encouragement!