Staying motivated
petiteerica
Posts: 4 Member
How do you stay motivated? I have tried calorie counting, working out regularly, portion watching, changing my diet and I just cannot figure out that is going to work for me after many months.
What keeps you motivated?
What keeps you motivated?
3
Replies
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What keeps me motivated is the same thing that got me to start. I want to live a long, healthy life. If the "why" isn't important to you then you're likely to just yo-yo. I count calories, and I've increased my walking. That's it. I have much more energy now, and I just feel so much better. What is your lasting "why"?7
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petiteerica wrote: »How do you stay motivated? I have tried calorie counting, working out regularly, portion watching, changing my diet and I just cannot figure out that is going to work for me after many months.
What keeps you motivated?
I'm a bit confused as to what you're looking for:
- how to stay motivated = how to stick to your strategy?
- or how to find something that works, since you seem to be changing strategies and can't find what works?
I think consistency is very important in finding what works, many people try something for a few days or weeks and then try something else because they don't have instant results, while they would be better served just being patient since true weight loss is measured over a longer period (at least one month/menstrual cycle, preferably two).
As for motivation to stick with it: finding a strategy that doesn't require tons of willpower is usually a good idea. So don't eliminate your favorite foods, don't overhaul your life in one go, don't choose exercise you hate, don't force yourself to do exercise at a frequency that isn't sustainable for you,... Gradual changes to your diet (if you feel it's necessary), gradual increases in exercise/activity (if you feel it's necessary)...15 -
I've struggled with this as well. There's nothing 'wrong' with you or uncommon about starting with a ton of motivation that is gone within 3 months. This can happen even if you are seeing progress along the way. It's important to look at times where you became discouraged and try to understand what happened so you can better identify and respond when you see yourself repeating a past trend.
As an example, you may have a small setback from eating too much either because of a weekend celebration, vacation, or falling off on a binge. You get on the scale and see weight has gone up and will take two weeks just to get back to where you were. Then consciously or subconsciously say *kitten* it and keep going and doing more damage.
Instead, if you can identify why the scale went up, what were the circumstances, what was your mindset, why didn't you stop, what could you have done differently, you'll be able to take control of your choices in the future. Most importantly, have self-compassion and accept that it has happened and that you may have some work to do getting back to where you were. Instead of focusing on the time it will take to get back to your lowest weight or NSV, realize how long it's taken you to get where you are and that you don't want two weeks to become three or more.
In short:
1) Accept the things you cannot change (past)
2) Focus on the things you can (future)
3) Develop the ability to determine which things are #1 or #2
Motivation in this case is foregoing short-term or instant gratification for long-term results and happiness. Eating or binge watching shows is a short-term pleasure that leads to long-term costs. You can make working out and eating healthy a short-term reward, but generally speaking it is the harder short-term road to walk. So you must remind yourself daily why you are on it, why you chose to skip the drive through or head to they gym. No matter where you are today, you will be somewhere else in 1 year and that will be determined by the sum of choices made in each of the 365 days between now and then. They won't all directly contribute to your long-term goals so your motivation is to make the average as high as possible.
The last thing I'd say is to spend time, however it works for you, processing that you are never going back to the "easy" or less disciplined path. Never means not now, not when you achieve your final goal, it means never. That doesn't mean you won't break your healthy habits from time to time, but means you fundamentally don't want to live your life that way. When you over eat or don't exercise, accept it as a choice you made but take time to tune in and be mindful about how it makes you feel. You may realize you feel sluggish, less sharp, maybe you have a stomach ache after eating too much sugar or feel less energized from skipping a workout. Tune into those feelings and you'll see the short-term "reward" actually came with more short-term cost then you had realized in the past.17 -
petiteerica wrote: »How do you stay motivated? I have tried calorie counting, working out regularly, portion watching, changing my diet and I just cannot figure out that is going to work for me after many months.
What keeps you motivated?
Motivated for what exactly? I think many people tend to put all of their eggs into the weightloss bucket as if that is the only measure of progress or success. It tends to be at the forefront of everything and the be all and end all.
I never really did that. For myself, everything was about my health first...and then my fitness and quality of life. I was in a pretty bad way from a health standpoint when I started all of this. I was 38 and my Dr. basically told me that if I didn't get my stuff together I would be lucky to see my 60s and if I did I would likely be very sick.
I started eating better...for my health. I started exercising regularly...for my health. I wasn't really focused on losing weight at all, it just happened as a natural bi-product of doing healthful things for myself. I marked progress through quarterly blood tests to see if things were improving...and once I started having success there I put my emphasis on my overall fitness and improving my physical capabilities.
As exercise goes, I found things that I enjoy doing...largely recreation that also involves physical activity. I don't try to kill myself in the gym...I go hiking...I ride my bike...I walk my dog...I kayak with the family...MTB on the weekends, etc. As diet goes, I eat healthfully most of the time but also balance that out with enjoyment and indulgences...I just don't indulge all of the time. I don't do the all or nothing thing and strive for balance and moderation.7 -
Motivated to do what?
To achieve what?
Why?
What does "work" mean?
What exactly is/are your goals? Without that clarity of knowing what you are trying to achieve not sure how anyone can help.
But would suggest having a serious and clear think about what you need to do, what you want to do and then maybe the how to get there will become clearer.
You can use this thread to bounce ideas about of course or a partner/friend but get that partner/friend to keep asking why. (When you get to the end of the whys your real goal might emerge or at least evolve.)0 -
All the above is true but ultimately at the risk of sounding pompous I don't believe motivation will get you there. It's self-discipline. You need to have the mindset that you will do whatever you have planned whether you feel like it or not! One tip I've found helpful (stolen from Graeme Obree) is I never decide whether to do a session from home. I go to the gym (or get on my bike) and START. If I still don't feel like it after 5 minutes then I go home.5
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I’m here 100% for my health. I’m not trying to look cute in a swimsuit, I’m purely trying to survive. So, my decisions can clearly be sorted into “Is this helping me reach my goal or not?”
Motivation is fleeting. But that’s okay.. find out what works for you and rely on habit. You don’t need motivation to brush your teeth for example. You just do it as a habit you have been building since you were a little baby. I think a lot of people come here and change too much, too soon and fall off the wagon. Look for sustainable, forever, changes.
I don’t know what that looks like for you, but for me, I have made small changes, that I can manage forever.Change one small thing and go from there. 💐4 -
That's the nice thing about making incremental, permanent changes. I don't need motivation to keep going. It's just my normal now.
My initial motivation when I was obese was to take really, really good care of myself. I didn't care what weight I ended up, but I knew my best state or health wouldn't be obese.3 -
DrifterBear wrote: »I've struggled with this as well. There's nothing 'wrong' with you or uncommon about starting with a ton of motivation that is gone within 3 months. This can happen even if you are seeing progress along the way. It's important to look at times where you became discouraged and try to understand what happened so you can better identify and respond when you see yourself repeating a past trend.
As an example, you may have a small setback from eating too much either because of a weekend celebration, vacation, or falling off on a binge. You get on the scale and see weight has gone up and will take two weeks just to get back to where you were. Then consciously or subconsciously say *kitten* it and keep going and doing more damage.
Instead, if you can identify why the scale went up, what were the circumstances, what was your mindset, why didn't you stop, what could you have done differently, you'll be able to take control of your choices in the future. Most importantly, have self-compassion and accept that it has happened and that you may have some work to do getting back to where you were. Instead of focusing on the time it will take to get back to your lowest weight or NSV, realize how long it's taken you to get where you are and that you don't want two weeks to become three or more.
In short:
1) Accept the things you cannot change (past)
2) Focus on the things you can (future)
3) Develop the ability to determine which things are #1 or #2
Motivation in this case is foregoing short-term or instant gratification for long-term results and happiness. Eating or binge watching shows is a short-term pleasure that leads to long-term costs. You can make working out and eating healthy a short-term reward, but generally speaking it is the harder short-term road to walk. So you must remind yourself daily why you are on it, why you chose to skip the drive through or head to they gym. No matter where you are today, you will be somewhere else in 1 year and that will be determined by the sum of choices made in each of the 365 days between now and then. They won't all directly contribute to your long-term goals so your motivation is to make the average as high as possible.
The last thing I'd say is to spend time, however it works for you, processing that you are never going back to the "easy" or less disciplined path. Never means not now, not when you achieve your final goal, it means never. That doesn't mean you won't break your healthy habits from time to time, but means you fundamentally don't want to live your life that way. When you over eat or don't exercise, accept it as a choice you made but take time to tune in and be mindful about how it makes you feel. You may realize you feel sluggish, less sharp, maybe you have a stomach ache after eating too much sugar or feel less energized from skipping a workout. Tune into those feelings and you'll see the short-term "reward" actually came with more short-term cost then you had realized in the past.
Great post.1 -
I'm not always motivated. This last week I have been working my butt off trying to help someone move. I have been watching my calories too. But it seems that the day I started helping my friend clean up to move, my weight loss stopped. While it might be water weight or muscle gain...it's still frustrating that the scale wouldn't budge! I lost motivation then. But that's when I acknowledged why I lost motivation and tell myself to suck it up, it will work in the long run, just keep at it and the pounds will start falling off again. This morning I got on the scale and my weight finally dropped by 1.2 pounds. It's been well over a week of no change at all (if any, the scale went up!). Motivation won't always get you to your goals....you have to push through even if you don't want to.4
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What motivates me the most is seeing others achieving their goals, against all odds. That shows me that it can be done and helps me to stay on track, or quickly get back on track when I fall off the wagon. This is why I like communities such as My Fitness Pal, because people share their experiences and their goal attainment. For me, there is no greater motivation than that.5
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I wish I'd had motivation 20 years ago. Now I'm desperately trying to lose weight and reverse my high cholesterol and diabetes diagnoses. Now it's no longer a choice to eat poorly/not exercise; I want to live a long life without health complications. Upside is it seems to be working.
Secondarily, I am no longer letting my "other half" influence what I eat. He's a big time carnivore, and I've been sick of grilled meat for years. He has no issues with his cholesterol but I do. I'm advocating for myself.6 -
Motivation is the endorphins kicking in after an awesome strength workout, or even some nice and slow LISS. of course, not everyone will feel this.1
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I don't stay motivated. I build habits that carry me through when the motivation wanes. I've been really struggling lately and not wanting to go to the gym. But I've been going at least four times a week for over five years now and that habit prevails even when I don't have any motivation.
I also have minimum goals, medium goals, and lofty goals for daily success. My minimum goals are getting to the gym 4 times a week and doing my compound lifts, at least 7,000 steps per day, and logging my food. Medium goals - adding in my accessory lifts, adding in focused cardio, and keeping calories under maintenance. Lofty goals are anything bigger than medium goals. Success is hitting minimum goals.10 -
quiksylver296 wrote: »I don't stay motivated. I build habits that carry me through when the motivation wanes. I've been really struggling lately and not wanting to go to the gym. But I've been going at least four times a week for over five years now and that habit prevails even when I don't have any motivation.
I also have minimum goals, medium goals, and lofty goals for daily success. My minimum goals are getting to the gym 4 times a week and doing my compound lifts, at least 7,000 steps per day, and logging my food. Medium goals - adding in my accessory lifts, adding in focused cardio, and keeping calories under maintenance. Lofty goals are anything bigger than medium goals. Success is hitting minimum goals.
You are so inspiring. Hope I can be like you one day. How long have you been logging your food now?0 -
I'm not into 'motivation' as a primary driver in anything. I just kind of make small changes I find reasonably easy and turn them into habits. I didn't decide 'wahoo, time to get healthy' and go out and start running 5k 5 days a week. I decided that I'd get up every morning, put on shoes and go outside. Then I decided I'd walk to the end of the street. Then I decided to jog that. Then I decided to see how fast I could do that. Then I decided to see how far I could go. After about 2 years of it I don't need motivation I will autopilot myself out the door and on that 5ish K run even if I'm 2/3 asleep because it's just habit, and so is every step leading up to it.
Same thing with food choices and tracking.
There is no motivation.
There's just deeply ingrained habits. That I built ONE TINY CHANGE AT A TIME.9 -
At first I started with lots of motivation. Now I'm 6 months in and have had a few challenges. The motivation is long gone but I try to recapture it by going on MFP or thinking about the reasons I started in the first place. Yes, lots has become habit but once you eat out of routine for a few days (I had to travel) then the cravings return and honestly it is a bit like restarting. I'm sitting at that restart right now. I didn't quit though. I'm holding onto that. Yes, I went up for few days and yes I logged over my goals for a few days but I did log and continue to work on my goals. Blips happen. Blips will happen again so recovery has to be part of the process too - that's self talk here lol. Just rambling now.
Anyhow, motivation sometimes has to be recaptured. That's ok too
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This is genius. I never regret a workout AFTER I do it, so once I'm doing it I wouldn't quit. Not to mention I do group classes, so there's no way I would walk out once I'm already there.All the above is true but ultimately at the risk of sounding pompous I don't believe motivation will get you there. It's self-discipline. You need to have the mindset that you will do whatever you have planned whether you feel like it or not! One tip I've found helpful (stolen from Graeme Obree) is I never decide whether to do a session from home. I go to the gym (or get on my bike) and START. If I still don't feel like it after 5 minutes then I go home.
Not sure I can add any new insight for the original poster, but feeling motivated comes and goes, so I agree with others that it comes down to determination and creating habits. I'm finally getting myself back on the wagon after a 1.5-year rough stretch where I had absolutely no motivation and felt like giving up. My habits took a hit, but none of them went away completely. (My tracking went down to less than 50%, but I didn't ever totally stop. My gym schedule went from 5-6 days a week down to 1-3, but I never quit. I allowed more junk food in my house, but still resisted a whole lot of it.) I've regained weight and I'm not happy with myself, but I know it would have been catastrophically worse if I hadn't developed those habits beforehand.3 -
bobsburgersfan wrote: »
This is genius. I never regret a workout AFTER I do it, so once I'm doing it I wouldn't quit. Not to mention I do group classes, so there's no way I would walk out once I'm already there.All the above is true but ultimately at the risk of sounding pompous I don't believe motivation will get you there. It's self-discipline. You need to have the mindset that you will do whatever you have planned whether you feel like it or not! One tip I've found helpful (stolen from Graeme Obree) is I never decide whether to do a session from home. I go to the gym (or get on my bike) and START. If I still don't feel like it after 5 minutes then I go home.
Not sure I can add any new insight for the original poster, but feeling motivated comes and goes, so I agree with others that it comes down to determination and creating habits. I'm finally getting myself back on the wagon after a 1.5-year rough stretch where I had absolutely no motivation and felt like giving up. My habits took a hit, but none of them went away completely. (My tracking went down to less than 50%, but I didn't ever totally stop. My gym schedule went from 5-6 days a week down to 1-3, but I never quit. I allowed more junk food in my house, but still resisted a whole lot of it.) I've regained weight and I'm not happy with myself, but I know it would have been catastrophically worse if I hadn't developed those habits beforehand.
Lol, this reminds me of my "gym sitting" phase.
I was in the process of developing the habit of doing my PT exercises before work. My home gym was in the basement, so I started by getting up every morning and putting on my gym clothes and then going down to the gym and sitting on the mat while drinking my coffee.
Then I would go to work.
I didn't do any exercise, and in fact, if I got motivated to exercise, I forced myself not to so that I wouldn't associate the habit with anything hard. For a month, I just sat every morning in the gym. Then after that, I was allowed to exercise, only if I felt like it, and only for 5-10 minutes.
I did that for another month, and then was allowed to exercise as much as I wanted. By the end of 3 months, exercising every morning was so automatic, it was hard not to. But if I felt crappy, I could just gym sit any given day.
What this habit-process did was that I was never, ever sitting in my cozy bed, in my cozy pyjamas, sipping a warm cozy coffee, and dreading putting on my gym clothes, and going into the basement, and doing hard exercise.
There was never anything to dread, because I never had to exercise if I really didn't feel like it. I just had to put on comfy gym clothes and go downstairs to my cozy gym to drink my coffee. I removed all of the steps between bed and exercise, so that the decision to exercise was always easy and obvious.
That's it.12 -
So much great advice everyone, just to answer a few questions, everyone has their why and I wanted to know yours. Everyone has different life experiences rather it be, health issues dr prescribed, a feeling of overall accomplishment, etc.
Since I have posted this I have met with my doctor again for the first time in a while and he did mention to me (though I look healthier, I have gained weight). I asked him if there was anything that he could think of, immediately he told me it was a new med that he had me on for my epilepsy. I have a very small stature and prior to the meds I was a very small 85 lbs at 5'1. I am now 135 lbs in just a year.
When I was 85 lbs I could eat anything that I wanted and nothing mattered. My diet has gotten significantly better because I did want to improve my health (not just weight) and it also even has contributed to a healthier (and higher) weight for me.
My issue is that (outside of the meds), I have not seen changes even though I've consistently kept my diet healthier (and yes I'll have "blips" here and there) but I do feel better than I ever have. But my weight is higher than it ever has been. Which makes the working out and activity discouraging when I see no changes after everything that I read from dieting, working out 3-4 times a week + and even NEAT activity.
Thank you all for the inspiration and kind words
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What keeps you motivated?[/quote]
I have to consistently check in with myself. I have a planner that I open up every single day and put motivational quotes in, stickers, goals, healthy ideas, my weight, meals for the week, my workouts, etc. I put in all exercise no matter how big or small, short or long. I look back each week and month to see my accomplishments. It's my own little pat on the back. Instead of a To Do list, I have a Ta-Dah list.
My profile pic is of me at my goal weight about 7 years ago. Every time I see that pic, I know what I am working towards. I want that again, and will have it. It's impossible to stay focused every single day but limiting social media and peoples perfect lives by replacing that time with MFP posts, comments, ideas, suggestions, real peoples challenges and successes...that keeps me focused on my goals. I've been very selective of friends (only females) on MFP. I only want MFP friends that I can encourage and MFP friends that will encourage me. I'm here on this journey to become my best me and I want to help anyone that wants that for themselves as well.
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I eat healthier to be healthier.
I get activity daily so I can stay active.
~~~~~I do this for ME~~~~~
2 -
Motivation comes and goes. What matters is CONSISTENCY with whatever program you're doing and being honest about it.
I haven't really changed anything about my program in the last 20 years and have stayed within 10lbs-20lbs of my ideal weight. I'll "cut" every now and then, but relatively stayed about 185lbs the majority of my life.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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For me it was the realization that I wasn't getting any younger and wanted to slide in to old age (I was 61 at the time) healthier. It was also the decision to NOT diet. I committed to changing my life style one small step at a time. As I made small changes that became habits, I added another small change. Logging my food of course and started to move more. Finally it was the acceptance that what I did to lose weight was what I'd do for life so there was no hurry.
If I got off track for a while, like when my Dad was hospitalized and died
it was hard to manage everything. My weight loss stalled and that was OK. I basically kept at it and kept losing. When I hit my first goal I didn't do much differently and kept losing.
There was one big event that keeps me motivated to this day. After losing about 50 lbs I had a heart attack. Not serious but still. My doctor encouraged me to go to cardiac rehab and I decided to get my weight into the healthy BMI range and stay there. Took about another 6 months to get to my goal and I've been at or under that goal for over 8 years. Exercise is now a non negotiable (and enjoyable) part f every day.
Ended up losing between 85 -90 lbs...feel great and probably in best shape of my life. Never having another heart attack is very motivating!
You can do this!5 -
I've learnt that I cannot predict how consistent I will be when it comes to weight loss. I've been losing consistently for the last 12 weeks. So why where things different a year ago and I wasn't losing consistently, not much has changed in my life? Don't know. Two years ago? Don't know. The longest consistent period I had in my life was 8 months. Why was that different? Don't know. If I've lost consistently for 7 months, it's likely that I'll be consistent in the next month but it's not guaranteed.
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