How did you accept this?
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acahane
Posts: 34 Member
I have been trying to loose weight/get healthy for a while now and run into a mental barrier. I do good for a while but then I start stuggling and fall back into old habits.
How did you accept that you would have to count calories for the rest of your life? The minute I stop I gain weight
How did you accept that a single slip up will damage your progress? Every week with a couple of mistakes in it and the scale does not change or goes up.
How did you accept that certain foods you will never be able to have just because you feel like it? I have a cheat day once a week but if that craving strikes me on a non cheat day, I struggle
How did you accept that the battle to change your mind and body will be a life long process?
How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying it's not fair they get to be thin naturally?
How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying I am just not dedicated enough, strong enough, good enough to change?
How did you accept that you would have to count calories for the rest of your life? The minute I stop I gain weight
How did you accept that a single slip up will damage your progress? Every week with a couple of mistakes in it and the scale does not change or goes up.
How did you accept that certain foods you will never be able to have just because you feel like it? I have a cheat day once a week but if that craving strikes me on a non cheat day, I struggle
How did you accept that the battle to change your mind and body will be a life long process?
How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying it's not fair they get to be thin naturally?
How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying I am just not dedicated enough, strong enough, good enough to change?
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Replies
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Im just going to say one thing...Do it for yourself! and if you want to have a six pack at least once to flaunt around then you work for it.
Its YOU vs YOU.0 -
I think these are very good questions, but to be honest there's too much negativity and self-torture going on here!
First of all, the important thing is that MFP teaches people to make a lifestyle change - to love good food and exercise. So I personally feel that by the time I reach my goal, I will be well used to eating and having a fitness routine and therefore won't have to count every single calorie anymore. You learn so much about food and how your body reacts to it in just a short time on MFP and that knowledge just naturally becomes a part of your life.
So I don't even think about having to count calories for the rest of my life - I'm simply going to carry on eating well and exercising for the rest of my life.
A single slip-up doesn't damage your progress - come on... you have cheat days once a week, why not change the way you see those "slip-ups" - it's not the end of the world! You're not going to gain 10lbs overnight from one slip up!
I'll always have any food I want when I feel like it - it's what I eat for the rest of the day and the next day that will make a difference.
The battle to changed your mind and body is not a lifelong process - once you learn, you learn. You can CHOOSE not to follow what you learned, but you can't help it - what you learned about what's good for you will always stay with you.
About comparing to others - this is something that's down to the individual I believe, perhaps a question of self-esteem? I can't help you there because I genuinely believe that comparing yourself to others is really counter-productive in every way. You can just be you, occupy a space that's just yours and filled with your own talents, thoughts, goals etc, and never compare yourself to others except when you need motivation. Everything else can be, to some, a waste of time and very bad for your ego. Just don't do it!0 -
^^^^ THIS^^^^0
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Because the alternative is so unacceptable.
I never want to go back to where I was, and I just have to keep telling myself that.
Definately not easy, but every one of us is worth the effort it takes.0 -
That is a great reply! I really needed to read it. For me, MFP has been the gateway to healthy living: I have got into running, stopped drinking so much booze and stopped eating junk almost completely. I still have the occasional blowout, but the joy of the MFP approach is that it's ok, you haven't done anything bad, maybe adjust the deficit downwards for a few days and you will be back to normal.
I think it's like managing other "chronic" conditions, albeit in a much less painful way. For example, if you have a particular type of diabetes you have to inject insulin 2-3 times a day. Compared with that, jumping on a scale and taking care of what you eat seem like a pretty good bargain!0 -
I didn't, because I won't. At the moment I'm young and fitness, lifting and aesthetic goals part of my mind right now. Will I do it forever? Nope. One day I'll just say "bugger it" and just settle down.How did you accept that you would have to count calories for the rest of your life? The minute I stop I gain weight
A single slip up won't damage my progress. Currently bulking, if I undereat one day, I can overeat the next. Vice-versa occurs when (and if) cutting, or just call that day a loss and move on; not stress about things like that, when in reality, they're probably due to special occasions (ie, holidays, reunions, etc)How did you accept that a single slip up will damage your progress? Every week with a couple of mistakes in it and the scale does not change or goes up.
I'm Coeliac. I eat gluten, I can be hospitalised. Dealt with it.How did you accept that certain foods you will never be able to have just because you feel like it? I have a cheat day once a week but if that craving strikes me on a non cheat day, I struggle
Pretty much this:How did you accept that the battle to change your mind and body will be a life long process?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yEm5E6yFUG0
Before I started tracking macros I was underweight, skeletal and weak. Probably due to not eating enough. In response, I was envious of those bigger/more muscular than me, but then realised that was because they were eating more. Nothing unfair about it.How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying it's not fair they get to be thin naturally?
By being dedicated, strong and making a change.How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying I am just not dedicated enough, strong enough, good enough to change?0 -
There are people on Mfp that are recovering from cancer, car crashes, broken bones and what not! If they can count calories, you can too! It takes minutes. 10 mins every day for a healthier you and a better looking you...0
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How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying it's not fair they get to be thin naturally?
I'll take this one, as one thing i have learnt through all this is that only about 5% of thin people are 'naturally' thin... the rest work their *kitten* off and say no to cake on a regular basis - you just dont see it!
i get told i am just 'naturally thin' all the time... er no, i am on my second round of insanity actually!0 -
I don't focus on that I will have to count cals for rest of my life and if I stop I will gain weight. If I would focus on that negative side of it I would feel overwhelmed as well, I used to do that. But now counting cals for me is not something I hate to do but must do to not get fat. It's something I am fortinate to do to stay fit and healthy. And if you focus on being fit and healthy instead of boring process of counting cals you will WANT to count cals. Whatever you focus on you will feel. A little psyhological trick I use now, but it works perfectly.
Single slip up will damage your progress? I doubt that is true. It must be more than just a SINGLE slip up. I am having an unplanned cheat meals or day once in a while, just because I crave something and can't hold myself. So I pig out for whole day lol. Haven't did any harm to me. I still don't gain anything and I don't think that anybody will gain fat from one single slip up. I gaina ton of water weight tho from all those extra carbs and salt I ate when piggiong out but that's just water. Obviously skale will go up then, but it's not thats serious. Hmm... I don't know, I think you are having way more than just "couple mistakes" then, if it's fat (whitch I doubt it is, it's just water)...
How did I accept that certain foods I will never be able to have just because I feel like it? Same answer - focus! Don't think about how tasty food is and how much you want it. Think about how bad you will feel after you give up and ate it, how unhealthy it is for you and think how good and proud you will feel if you don't give in. Associate and focus having cheat meal unplanned with bad feelings and associate eating healthy foods with tons of energy and pride instead of pain of eating untasty foods. Like I said, this little psyhological trick has did wonders for me. It helps if you do this loud. If you have wrong focus next time go to mirror and tell yourself what's up. Might sound silly but it works.
How did I accept that the battle to change your mind and body will be a life long process? Again, you focus on wrong things. That it is a hard battle, that omg you will have to do this for whole life - this boring calories counting and eating untasty foods. Focus on that you will be fit and healthy for whole life. And if you focus on revard instead of how hard it is then you will want to do that not hate to do that. Again, doing it loud and talking to yourself helps.
How did I stop comparing myself to others and saying it's not fair they get to be thin naturally? Never really did, I don't think at least. All I cared was how I look and feel, never gave a crap about others. And I don't think you should either. You are not them and life is not fair lol. Sounds corny but it's true. Deal with it.
How did I stop comparing myrself to others and saying I am just not dedicated enough, strong enough, good enough to change? Tell yourself that you ARE dedicated enough, strong enough, good enough to change!!! Go to mirror and tell yourself what's up! Like if you have kids, they might go to you and tell "Dad, I'm such a loser. I failed my team at football game today. Everybody made fun of me, I will never get bettr" what would you tell him? "Yea, you are loser, you should give up on that game it is for strong kids not losers like you. These kids who made fun of you are right cos you are pathetic player."? No? Have this converstaion with yourself in a mirror every day...
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Thank you for the replies. I am reading and trying to take it on board.0
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This is a tough one but somehow I feel like I have lived this enough to know I can reply.
You need to get your head out of 'diet' mode and into lifestyle mode.
I have done every single diet going - and had great success at weight loss with no exercise! BUT I have said no to everything! EVERYTHING that is remotely bad for me! inevitibly I have been clock watching until I hit that golden weight target then gone out and gone stupid!!
Since embracing the MFP way of life this has all changed!
The calorie counting thing - is not a chore - as a previous poster said, its a couple of mins max! The 'what you eat' is the bit you need to control. Why do you call them 'cheat' days? What/who are you cheating? Noone! if you are doing exercise and staying healthy, a burger or cake now and again isnt going to hurt! I LOVE bags of crisps, I have a packet every single day! I am not cheating - I am eating! I work out, I eat healthily, and enjoy the occasional treat - hell I even make sure I have room for a glass of wine (at least) every day - and have chocolate in the fridge for when I have finished a workout! I am not cheating - I worked for it!
The scales are continuing to move in the right direction - granted - very slowly! but I am so happy that it is slow! It means the changes I am making have longer to settle in! I never feel deprived! Hell I have some little visitors this weekend and I bought a great big pizza - it will be nearly 700 cals for half of it - I am going to eat it an enjoy it! I have made allowances today to ensure I can fit it into my daily count - but if I go over I wont sweat it!
because of the changes i have made I recently went on holiday for a week to greece! I have never eaten more potato - pasta (not typically greek but was visiting parent) drank more red wine - I didnt count for that whole week - I knew i could fix any damage on my return! only on my return guess what? no damage! Every day whilst away I went for a hike - I continued to drink lots of water - I must also have been eating more healthily despite the quantity and it works! I think the lifestyle change is well and truly in!!
Comparing yourself to others! Try thinking about it differently! I always compare myself to others - with disastrous results. It just gets depressing! Then I went on a school reunion. met someone again that I knew had struggled wiht her weight! I knew she had made a change from her facebook posts about working out - when I saw her! Did I compare? yes - yes I did! did it depress me? absolutely not - it was that very moment and that very person who for once in my life I didnt do a negative comparison...... I decided I was going to be like her! She is a fantastic inspiration - I booked myself on bootcamp to give my fitness a kick start, I joined MFP to track everything - I invested in a HRM (which I love btw - but thats for another post!), and i went on another reunion 3mths later - 21lb lighter! I compared myself wiht her again.... for the good! You know what stands out about both of us now I regularly work out? Smiles! Everything gets smaller but all anyone can see is our smiles! now its my smile I compare with other people! As the weight comes off the confidence grows and the smile becomes ever wider!
Stick with it - get the word 'diet' out of your head! Get the finite approach to eating out of your head. This is it! this is your life! Eat drink and be merry - just less of the first and second! you will soon find it is second nature!
If you ever feel deprived - you are doing it wrong!! Best of luck!0 -
Some good replies here.
Believe in yourself. Not just in your ability to lose weight or reach your fitness goals, but in LIFE.
Sometimes, it might be difficult, but you are worth it.0 -
I have been trying to loose weight/get healthy for a while now and run into a mental barrier. I do good for a while but then I start stuggling and fall back into old habits.
How did you accept that you would have to count calories for the rest of your life? The minute I stop I gain weight
How did you accept that a single slip up will damage your progress? Every week with a couple of mistakes in it and the scale does not change or goes up.
How did you accept that certain foods you will never be able to have just because you feel like it? I have a cheat day once a week but if that craving strikes me on a non cheat day, I struggle
How did you accept that the battle to change your mind and body will be a life long process?
How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying it's not fair they get to be thin naturally?
How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying I am just not dedicated enough, strong enough, good enough to change?
Ooh that inner dialogue is a killer....I wouldn't talk to myself if I were you :laugh:
It gets better. You will not always feel the way you do now (presumably overweight) as you will once you reach your weight loss goals.
I'm sure you'll get a great deal of advice as to how to deal with all you've listed above, but in the end, you'll find your own way to make it work.
I know for me, I feel like a totally different person :blushing: I hadn't realized how much my diet and genetic factors came together to create the perfect storm of a metabolic disorderly mess. To this end, I was lifting weights, exercising, eating well, but nothing was happening....I did this for years....once my medical issues were clinically recognized, I was able to change a couple of things to optimize my efforts.
Now, I'm not starving all the time. I don't think about food all the time. Exercise is becoming evident as my muscles become more shapely. I sleep pretty well. I'm not fatigued all day long. In short....I just don't struggle anymore. :blushing:
I too used to wonder how & why there were thin people walking around :sick: Mainly because I was doing everything people do to lose weight....weighing my food to the gram, using a fitbit & HR monitor with a strap, weight training, gym classes, yoga classes...all at the same time....eating more, eating less....nothing worked. :grumble:
Now that my medical issues are being managed, I'm a whole new person & 23#'s lighter. I have a different set of problems now that I'm slimmer though :laugh: I'll take this set over the last set over the last, any day!:drinker: :drinker: :drinker:0 -
I purely use my fitness pal to simply log my food.
My motivation to continue is my health. We only live once and really, nobody has time to be fat or unhealthy. Once I really let that sink in losing weight can be quite a fun journey. Even when I hit my goals, look exactly how I want to look. The motivation will be how far I've come0 -
Having read the title, I thought it's a thread about, you know, how did you accept being this unhealthy and overweight and all.0
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I have been trying to loose weight/get healthy for a while now and run into a mental barrier. I do good for a while but then I start stuggling and fall back into old habits.
How did you accept that you would have to count calories for the rest of your life? The minute I stop I gain weight
That suggests you're having issues with either estimating how much food you're eating or not caring when you do overeat.How did you accept that a single slip up will damage your progress? Every week with a couple of mistakes in it and the scale does not change or goes up.
You're not a special snowflake and you WILL make mistakes, same as the rest of us. Welcome to Earth and being human. What you do with those mistakes is up to you.How did you accept that certain foods you will never be able to have just because you feel like it?
I don't get to punch stupid people in the face even though I feel like it, either. There is NO food that's "off the list" for me (other than soda, which I see as expensive fizzy water at best). I eat ice cream, cakes, bacon, eggs, tacos, and damned near everything else - in moderation.I have a cheat day once a week but if that craving strikes me on a non cheat day, I struggle
Stop having cheat days. On my 'diet' I'm allotted about 1600 calories a day. Anything more than that I have to earn through exercise - and I've put in some long hours of heavy labor to splurge.How did you accept that the battle to change your mind and body will be a life long process?
By not looking at it in that way. I work out and eat the way I do because I feel worlds better when I do. It's gotten to the point where I have to move a lot to feel right.How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying it's not fair they get to be thin naturally?
People who are 'naturally thin' eat at their maintenance level. It's not rocket surgery.How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying I am just not dedicated enough, strong enough, good enough to change?
By not having a victim mentality. The further I get from the fatass I used to be, the more my thinking has changed from "I can't do this" to "What the hell do I have to lose by giving it a shot?" and it carries across to most aspects of my life.
Seriously - and this is going to be harsh - you're whining. Stop that. There are people here with far worse problems than yours who WILL make it to their goal because they stopped complaining about 'how hard it is' and 'my genetics' and just ****ing did it.
I've been fat or obese for almost my entire adult life, and currently I'm nine pounds from being normal weight. I started this at the age of forty five.
Does it take effort? Of course. Are there days I want to throw in the towel? Damned straight there are. So what? I don't feel like going to work some days, or rolling out of bed, or doing the dishes either - but they all MUST be done if I'm to live any kind of life worth the effort.0 -
Wow, you make losing weight sound like a really dreadful burden!!! Jesus Christ, get a grip man! You've done brilliantly so far, just keep plugging away!0
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How did you accept that you would have to count calories for the rest of your life? The minute I stop I gain weight
Well, I have two chronic health conditions I have to manage for the rest of my life. One is mental illness and one is a heart condition I was born with. So I just consider my weight issues like that; a chronic condition I have. If I don't manage it, The fat will creep back on. Can't cry over it, many, many, many people have much worse conditions than a bit of the crazy, a bum heart, and periodic fat attacks :laugh:
How did you accept that a single slip up will damage your progress? Every week with a couple of mistakes in it and the scale does not change or goes up.
This used to bother me but after a while, about 6-7 months in I realized that the scale was consistently going DOWN. Slow, and sometimes blipping back up, but overall the trend was/is down.
How did you accept that certain foods you will never be able to have just because you feel like it? I have a cheat day once a week but if that craving strikes me on a non cheat day, I struggle
I don't accept this, not at all. I eat what I want, when I want. I just don't OVEREAT on treats. See my diary. See my weightloss. :drinker:
How did you accept that the battle to change your mind and body will be a life long process?
What was the alternative? Refuse to accept it and remain obese? Listen, I got SICK from obesity. Ugh. I refused to accept there was nothing I could do but remain passively stuffing my face and being inactive. :noway:
How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying it's not fair they get to be thin naturally?
I learned in Kindergarten that life is not fair, so this wasn't an issue for me :happy:
How did you stop comparing yourself to others and saying I am just not dedicated enough, strong enough, good enough to change?
By telling myself that I AM dedicated enough, strong enough, good enough to change!! :flowerforyou:0 -
It sounds like your looking at this like a deat sentance ,and thats kinda bad , your minds going to keep on bucking against you until you change your way of thinking...Be more postive 0
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Everything I could have said to fully answer your questions has been stated by the members above me. There are a lot of good answers here, and should be taken to heart. It IS all about mindset: lifestyle change vs. dieting/temporary change. You are worth the effort it will take to stick to the changes that you know you need to make for you. Stick with it, and be PROUD. You're not alone. :-D0
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