Objective way to find ideal weight range?

CeeBeeSlim

Hello. I’m probably obsessing about this too much and I’d like to stop.

Quick history - 57, 5’3 - lost 30 pounds (142-112) during last year and a half. Was eating about 1250 calories. Goal was 125 but kept going. Shrugged off the “you look sickly” comments as I felt ok, looked good, and proud of myself.

Slowly gained to 127 since Nov 2021 (vacation, family, stress) and have been here for a while. Strength training two-three times a week, some cardio - clothes are only just a tiny bit tighter than I was at 112?

Anyhow at 127 I feel a bit pudgy in the belly but generally like the way I look and clearly eating over calories because I have not gone under 126 for months - since about May when i really started trying to lose again.

Everyone now says I look like im “supposed to look” not “miss turkey neck”. 😡 Some showed me photos they took of me - not attractive - but I think that’s because I was still wearing my previous size clothing.

If I’m honest, I like the 112 (maybe just because it marked such an accomplishment and my over focus on scale weight) but I feel a bit better - lifestyle wise - glass of wine here or there, not exercising daily, etc - but pudgy around 127.

Advice? Is 112 too low?

DancingMoosie

For me, coming from a similar height and weight range, 112 was what I wanted, but not necessarily the healthiest or most attractive. 120 is easily more sustainable and I don't get the "too skinny" comments. Find a healthy balance. A lot of people find that after losing weight at low calories without strength training, and then reverse dieting with strength training, they can still be a small size at a higher weight. That's what seems like the better option.

COGypsy

I’m with @DancingMoosie and think there’s quite a bit of leeway between 112 and 127. Maybe something around 120 would keep the “pudge” at bay and still give you the leeway for a more comfortable lifestyle day to day.

sbelletti

How do YOU feel? How do YOU think you look? Did you choose to lose weight/get fit for YOUR benefit or someone else's?

Unless you have an ED or major body dysmorphia, etc, your opinion should be the only one that matters. IMO. 😁

IAmTheGlue

I would never, and I mean NEVER, take body advice from anyone who called me names or pulled out some pictures they had been saving to shame me. Absolutely not.

How do you feel? That’s the only thing that matters. It’s your body.

AnnPT77

Within a healthy range - which you are at any of the weights you mentioned, unless you have a very, very unusual body configuration - it's all about personal preference and personal choice. In my case, I figure my doctor gets an opinion, but no one else's preferences matter, and it's 100% my decision in the end.

Yeah, for a lot of us there's a difference in where we think we look best, vs. where it's most pleasant to maintain in terms of eating habits . . . but again, very personal decision. Different people will want different tradeoffs.

I can't speak for you, but part of my experience was that some of my friends/relatives/acquaintances kind of freaked out that I'd lost so much weight (at what they thought was a fast pace, but IMO really wasn't - averaged a pound a week, lost a little faster than that at the start when lots to lose, much slower at the end as goal approached). I heard the "too skinny" "skin and bones" "are you anorexic?" kind of comments. 🙄

After a while, though, they got used to the new me, eventually found that me-version unremarkable, and stopped remarking. I asked one friend - one who's usually rational and could be trusted to give me an honest answer - whether she still thought I looked too thin. She said no. I asked her if she knew why she'd thought I was too thin at first. She wavered between shock, and jealousy, as her explanations. 🤷‍♀️

It's your decision. Ignore other people (except maybe your doctor).

CeeBeeSlim

@DancingMoosie Thank you. Assuming you settled on a goal weight range was that more like 115-120, 120-125, or 117-123? Picky I know - but I need that kind of structure so I know never to let that weight creep get out of control. I got cocky and sloppy.

@COGypsy Thank you. Sounding like this makes sense.

@IAmTheGlue @AnnPT77 You’re both right. And those giving me the advice were/are overweight - so it’s interesting about the shock and jealousy reactions your friend had @AnnPT77. I felt great - just the comments and photos were getting to me.

My only concern was I was struck how much little food I really needed to feel full, and really using the tools I learned - eating when I was hungry, only until I was satiated, eating slowly, no mindless snacking so those last ten pounds that folks say was hard to lose wasn’t that hard. My goal weight was 125 - so the lack of my old appetite made me wonder. Clearly it came back!

When I next go to my doc I will ask, but shooting for 120 makes sense.

SueInAz

Having been at both ends of the weight range and about your height... Pick a goal that will be easy for you to maintain over the long haul. You can eat more calories to maintain a higher weight. Also remember that muscle weighs more than fat by volume so you could be the same size at 112 (higher body fat) or 127 (lower body fat) but how you will look could be vastly different. When I was really lifting, I weighed closer to 130 but looked and felt great and I was strong. I could eat more and maintain that weight a lot more easily than I could when I was 120 and not lifting.

katemcd495

Maybe instead of picking a number on the scale try a piece of clothing you feel beautiful in. Wear it regularly and if you notice you gain a little and it doesn't lay as nicely then adjust accordingly?

Just a thought!