How I lost weight, reached my goal, and kept it off

As I return from a 2-week vacation I am reminded that my habits are what has allowed me to maintain my weight and weather all storms. I want to share this concept with anyone who is interested on these boards because it took me a while to get it, and if this helps anyone I will be happy.

I think the biggest misconception I see out there is that people want to lose weight quickly so they can be done. The secret is - there is no finish line. I'm guessing most of us (me for sure) spend so much time being on or off "being good." If we slip up with a binge, or a big weekend, or even a high-calorie meal out, we say, well, this day is done, might as well enjoy it and start again tomorrow. Or Monday. Or the first of the month. Or the first of the year. Like it's an off and on thing. Even when we get to our goal (or close to our goal), once we get there, it's like Yay! We won! Time to get back to eating like we want.

But herein lies the rub. If you want to actually keep off the weight you lost, your eating is basically going to be the same as when you lost weight, you just get a few extra hundred calories a week. That translates to maybe now you get cheese on your sandwich, nuts on your salad, an extra tsp of olive oil when you sauté vegetables. I still weigh, I still track, I just get some extra calories to play with, but maintenance has basically been the same as losing.

What that means is, if you want to keep the weight off, you need to find a way to eat NOW (while you are losing), that you can keep up even when you make goal. I am 50 years old, 5'4" and my goal range is 120-130. I have reached that goal (SW: 183) and stayed in my range for about 8 years now. I had to change my life. I have had to figure out breakfasts, lunches, dinners, and snacks, that I love. I cannot feel deprived. My husband and I go to brunch Saturday and Sunday and I want cocktails with brunch both days. I have had to create a lifestyle that is within my calorie range, and that I LIKE and ENJOY. This generally means I do not deprive myself with huge caloric deficits. Not now, not when I was losing.

I have been there when you think you should eat 1200 calories a day to get to goal faster. Now, that seems absurd to me. I urge everyone on these message boards to think about maintenance. Think about establishing habit changes that you can do every day and will make you happy. That takes time. That means making SMALL changes over time that you can live with. Not going from indulging in everything you want to 1200 calories a day. It means thinking about small changes you can make in your diet, and honing those changes, over time. There is no rush - this is forever.

And this is key: once you do this, and slowly make the habit changes you want, there is no "off plan" and "on plan." There is no "being good," It's just your life. You teach yourself to eat like someone who can manage food. I was reminded of this as I returned from vacation (2 weeks on the back of a motorcycle so no movement and eating out every meal) and as soon as I got back it was just automatic to start eating my regular meals, doing my regular activity, living my life. I didn't even think about it.

I don't know if this makes sense to folks, but I hope it can help some people. You have to let go of wanting the weight off quickly, and change your thinking to how you can SLOWLY change your habits so you can sustain them, and they become your life. Thanks for indulging me, and I get that some will disagree, but I hope this will reach others. And for the sake of full disclosure, the podcast Half Size Me really helped me realize this.

Replies

  • propstome
    propstome Posts: 11 Member
    Wow! This makes so much sense! I completely agree! Now that I am back on MFP and have been “on” and “off” for as long as I can remember, this will be my new mindset. Thank you for the insight!
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 17,953 Member
    This really resonates and it very much a conclusion I have come to. This was the mindset I had when I lost a great deal of weight 2014-2016 and maintained it til around 2018, and it was when that slipped that I piled it all back on.
  • texasbon
    texasbon Posts: 1 Member
    How do I find out how many calories a day I should have to lose weight??
  • ChickenKillerPuppy
    ChickenKillerPuppy Posts: 297 Member
    edited October 2022
    @Ann__777 , To be fair, i got to my goal range about 12 years ago, but for several of those years I would still gain back about 10-20 of the 50 pounds I had lost every few years or so, and then get back down to goal. It was only when i truly embraced the mindset above over the past 3 years that I have not only stopped gaining back weight, but most importantly my mindset changed. And again - not to sound like a shill bc I get nothing from promoting this free podcast, but the Half Size Me podcast really helped change my mindset.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 33,905 Member
    edited October 2022
    texasbon wrote: »
    How do I find out how many calories a day I should have to lose weight??

    The setup Goals page. Here: https://www.myfitnesspal.com/account/my-goals
    Start a new thread if you need more input. This thread is about Maintaining/Losing strategies, not exact answers to calories. :)
    Here is an explanation: https://support.myfitnesspal.com/hc/en-us/articles/360032625391-How-does-MyFitnessPal-calculate-my-initial-goals-
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 33,905 Member
    @ChickenKillerPuppy

    Well said. :flowerforyou:

    Life happens. The trick is learning to make food fit into the Plan - forever.
  • ahoy_m8
    ahoy_m8 Posts: 3,048 Member
    Great post, OP.
  • hccgg
    hccgg Posts: 2 Member
    Your story is very helpful for where I am now, After years of on & off MFP, I just want to change my eating habits & stick with it. All our numbers are similar, so it’s great to hear you accomplished the very thing I’m aiming to do. Thank you!