How do you get in the right mindset?

sugarfreesquirrel

Been doing some thinking and realised, I don't like myself very much. I keep self sabotaging. I make myself go on long walks when I hate exercising and keep blowing through all my money on snack foods.

Been pondering and realised I feel different from other people, I feel like I don't deserve to be healthy or successful and maybe I'm not worth it the effort? I'm wondering if these things are keeping me overweight? like if I loved myself maybe it would be easier?

I've been seeing a dietitian for my diabetes and she says my base diet is good, it's just the snacks I insist on eating that are a problem. My blood sugars are back in the healthy range at least.

sugarfreesquirrel

Thanks y'all

sollyn23l2

If your blood sugars are back in the healthy range that's huge. And shows you're doing something right. If the snacks are your main issue the simplest answer is don't buy them, don't keep them in the house. Can't eat what you don't have.

88olds

I didn’t decide I loved my 285 lb self. But my thinking went like this. Do you believe in something like basic human respect? Just basics. Something everyone gets no matter what. You believe something like that? I do. I used to work with people who were in jail. Some for good reason. But even they got some basics. So I’ll ask you again, are people entitled to some basic respect?

Have you done anything that should make you disqualified? Now answer truthfully, whatever is going on in your head right now, do you think there is just cause for you not to get basic respect? I know, years of kicking yourself isn’t going to reverse that easy but I’m betting you have to admit you should get the basics even if it doesn’t feel like it. To the degree possible do you thing included in basic respect is your right to determine for yourself how you want to live? By degree possible I mean you don’t have a right to live in your neighbors house. Without encroaching on others, do you believe you should be able to decide how you want to live your life?

Like I said, I didn’t decide that I love my 285 lb self, but I came to respect the part of me that wanted something better. And it was all me. I guess I had to forgive myself for getting to 285 but I thought I was doing what I had to do at the time. But there was that part that was tired of it. And then there was the part that was afraid. I was on my way to 300lbs. I feared there would be a point where there would be no going back.

But you don’t need to love yourself. You need to fight for yourself. At least a little. I came to think of it as arguing with myself and winning.
If you don’t think you deserve to be heathy and successful come on and respond and I’ll argue the point with you here. But you already have the idea that there is possibly something better, you just don’t know how to get it. That part of you that wants to change is like an under used muscle. You need to work it to make it stronger. As it gets stronger, things get easier.

And this- different from other people? If you want to turn things around you had better be different because most people don’t do it. Lots of people start weight loss, most people quit. Some people lose significant amounts, lots of them gain it back. Some with extra. Be you. Become a scientist. Your area of study is you losing weight. You can do it.

empresssue

I started & did really well for 4 years. Then I fell off the rails. I spent 4 more years starting & stopping. It was not until I did the mental work around why I wanted it & why I didn’t think I deserved it, that I FINALLY got back into the right headspace. Weight loss & maintaining it is a mental game.

And if no one else tells you today: you DESERVE to feel good today & everyday🤗

MaggieGirl135

Your second paragraph says a lot. Working with a dietician is good; adding a mental health therapist may also help you. Please give it consideration. Hugs

chris_in_cal

It's opaque and difficult to lay out here in a forum, though I think you are spot on with this. Somehow, in my experience, the right "mindset" or mental health, or sense of self, is an absolute cornerstone to my weight issues and level of self-care I take. I don't have any answers, just encourage you to keep working and let us know what resonates with you and what you discover.