Just Give Me 10 Days -Round 217

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  • fmfdfa2020
    fmfdfa2020 Posts: 890 Member
    edited March 2023
    fmfdfa2020 wrote: »
    shmmm3 wrote: »
    @SheilaBoneham Yay! I'm copying your tracking method :)

    100-day Binge-free Challenge starting March 13….
    *=1 day. ⭐️=10 days
    ****

    @SheilaBoneham @shmmm3 @musicsax I like this tracking for our 100-day challenge. I'm copying it too! :)

    @mthomas0228 adding you to this post. I just saw where you said "**I'm also in for the 100-day binge free challenge! Currently 16/100 binge free**" Wow, 16 days! Fabulous!!
  • GirlOnTheRebound
    GirlOnTheRebound Posts: 258 Member
    shmmm3 wrote: »
    SW RND 217

    Goals
    #1 No added sugar or ultra processed foods and no more than one alcoholic drink per day.
    #2 No eating after 9 pm.
    #3 Walk the dog twice a day.

    3/13 👍👍This is NOT A DIET. It’s a LIFESTYLE. I'm copying this phrase to my post this round because I too need to reframe. My original "why" is the same as today. Most of my health problems were attributed to my weight, diet, and lifestyle factors that I learned how to control. So, I'm now at a healthy normal weight, but the weight itself was only one part of it. I can't throw out the diet and lifestyle that got me here and got me feeling better even if everyone around me thinks it's too restrictive and too strict. I know how I feel and how things make me feel. Eating and drinking things just to fit in makes for a great time in the short term but I pay for it for days afterward. I have to eat well for my body every day if I want to feel good every day. This round I'm going to cut back on caffeine and be very gentle with myself at maintenance calories. Eat well today and tomorrow morning I'll feel good. Okay. Let's do this again.

    3/14 Day 1 of a new experiment. I've changed my food diary settings to show 8-10am, 10-12 pm, 12-2 pm, 2-4 pm, 4-6 pm, 6-8 pm. I almost always eat more later in the day and I'm hoping this will give me a clearer picture of my habits. I'm going to aim to eat no more than 1000 calories per 2 hour window. I usually eat very light as I'm running about in the day and then I'm starving at night. With healthy foods like nuts and dried fruits I can easily surpass 1000 calories in an hour. I need to get out of that habit. If I can aim to keep my 6-8pm window to less than 1000 calories I will be more motivated to eat enough earlier in the day and have a stricter guideline for what constitutes over eating. I'm curious to see how this change plays out.

    3/15 126.8 this is a happy surprise. I was sure I'd gained more from the weekend but it seems to have evened out now that bloat is gone. Why, oh why does food have to be so hard to self-police? Maybe when it becomes more socially acceptable that sugar addiction is a real addiction I'll feel less like I'm being a baby about it. Someone else here was talking about being a food-aholic. Yep, me too, but my poison is sugar. My only way out is through fully committing to natural foods in their natural form and avoiding absolutely anything that a neuroscientist had any say in marketing and producing. Good news: I'm not scared of restaurants anymore regarding my diet goals. As long as I steer clear of cheese (I'm disheartened to have confirmed that I'm sensitive to it) and deep fried things, I can keep my diet on track without sacrificing social time :smiley:

    3/16 DNW My experience with dairy has been illuminating. I spent a lot of time researching dairy yesterday. Apparently, people can become lactose intolerant in adulthood and not even know it. That may be me. Further, symptoms of PMS and menstrual pain can be alleviated by cutting dairy altogether and keeping meat products to organic chicken or grass fed and finished beef. I'm trying to find a bright side to not enjoying cream cheese anymore. So, if I can go the rest of March with only kerrygold butter, no cream, no cheese, and only expensive and not as delicious steaks, maybe my next period won't be debilitating. I assumed that my menstrual symptoms were all due to being overweight, technically obese, but now I can't attribute my hormone problems to an excess of fat cells. Wouldn't it be great if this is the last piece of the puzzle? I'm really hopeful. Also, 3 days without binging!

    3/17 DNW Had a bad day at work today. All of my failures and personal failings were basically read back to me as a laundry list of my utter failure as a human being. I surprised myself that I kept from crying in the moment because as it went on and on I could feel every blood vessel in my face and neck. I think that what it turned into was entirely my fault because my frozen body language and trying so hard not to shake and sob and fully break down gave the impression that I didn't care or wasn't taking the conversation seriously. I have no idea how I walked out of there without shedding a tear and I still think I gave the impression that I wasn't taking it seriously. The criticism hit home. In the first 60 seconds it did. In the first 5 minutes it did. It hit home so quickly that all ability to express any emotion or movement left my body and all I could mutter out from the beginning was repetitions of "you're right, I'm sorry." Yet, it needed to go on for another 30 minutes and their voice needed to be raised louder and louder because I must have seemed like I didn't care about it because I was paralyzed trying to think of anything to keep me from sobbing. I hate that my lack of responsibility made it happen. I hate that I made a person I like and respect feel they needed to do that when I know it wasn't fun for them. I hate that I can't act like a normal human being and I cause good people to become angry. On the bright side, I have no appetite tonight.
    3/18
    3/19
    3/20
    3/21
    3/22


    I am so sorry you went through this. I can feel your pain in your post. To be able to journal your thoughts by reliving the emotion is not easy. We....i....don't take criticism well. The sense that someone feels less then satisfied with our performance is heart breaking. Whether it be work or parenting or our hobbies, we want to please. So proud of you for staying strong. Proud of you for seeing the other side. Proud of you for taking the time to absorb and process before reacting. Each moment has the ability to derail us or define us. You did the latter. I hope continued reflection gives you more clarity. Again....I am sorry. But for what it's worth, I am proud ❤️
  • SModa61
    SModa61 Posts: 2,828 Member
    clprieur wrote: »
    shmmm3 wrote: »
    SW RND 217

    3/17 DNW Had a bad day at work today. All of my failures and personal failings were basically read back to me as a laundry list of my utter failure as a human being. I surprised myself that I kept from crying in the moment because as it went on and on I could feel every blood vessel in my face and neck. I think that what it turned into was entirely my fault because my frozen body language and trying so hard not to shake and sob and fully break down gave the impression that I didn't care or wasn't taking the conversation seriously. I have no idea how I walked out of there without shedding a tear and I still think I gave the impression that I wasn't taking it seriously. The criticism hit home. In the first 60 seconds it did. In the first 5 minutes it did. It hit home so quickly that all ability to express any emotion or movement left my body and all I could mutter out from the beginning was repetitions of "you're right, I'm sorry." Yet, it needed to go on for another 30 minutes and their voice needed to be raised louder and louder because I must have seemed like I didn't care about it because I was paralyzed trying to think of anything to keep me from sobbing. I hate that my lack of responsibility made it happen. I hate that I made a person I like and respect feel they needed to do that when I know it wasn't fun for them. I hate that I can't act like a normal human being and I cause good people to become angry. On the bright side, I have no appetite tonight.

    @shmmm3 Hey, I'm so sorry that you had to go through that. It doesn't sound like it was a very fair conversation. From an outsider's perspective, it almost feels as though because you were acting passive the other person felt the could just walk all over you. Either way, you are NOT responsible for that person's behaviour - they are. It doesn't sound like they were being very respectful. :(

    Anyway, I just wanted to say that that sounds like it sucked and I am really glad you didn't "turn to food" as they say, for comfort. But remember to use some other coping skills. Take care of yourself.

    @shmmm3 So sorry for what you went through. If it were me, I'm not sure I would have been able to control my reaction, whatever that might have been. Is there outside help/support for you?
  • musicsax
    musicsax Posts: 4,228 Member
    @shmmm3 - I'm so sorry you had to go through this, they have failed in the meeting,; no positives? no plan to improve? Not a good appraisal at all! I remember your list of positives from earlier in the round, you should concentrate and reflect on those, in my opinion you are doing well. Sending you comforting and positive hugs xx
  • jspecies11
    jspecies11 Posts: 955 Member
    edited March 2023
    @GirlOnTheRebound
    Sometimes I want to wear a chat bubble over my head saying "yes I am a big girl but not as big as six months ago"

    I so appreciate this comment. When I see people out walking or jogging that are not “magazine thin” I think about how much they might have already lost, how hard it is to put those shoes on and I am cheering them on! Bravo! You got this!

    Ugh can’t quite figure out the quote function.