Lost weight and still not happy? HELP?

breanajune0525
breanajune0525 Posts: 21
in Motivation and Support
My smallest weight was 120 when I was 16.
im now 19 and weigh 160.

my smallest size was a 5 and now im a 11-13.
Even at my smallest I was unhappy and depressed and continued to treat myself the same way I did when I was bigger(degrade, talk down to, self mutilate)
. I never thought I looked good enough..
.im worried that ill lose the weight but still be unhappy and that realize that all the hard work was for nothing?

anybody feel this was at some point or another?
and if so how are they coping with it or how you got over it?

Replies

  • InForBacon
    InForBacon Posts: 1,508 Member
    Probably a good idea to get professional help.
  • tlou5
    tlou5 Posts: 497 Member
    I agree. I think it would be a good idea to seek professional help to prevent self mutilation and to begin changing your negative thought patterns.
  • JavaJuno
    JavaJuno Posts: 9 Member
    It seems like your problem is more your psychological view of yourself, because judging from you profile pic darlin', you're beautiful.
    I think it would be a good idea to talk to someone - professional or not - about your views of yourself and anything else that bothers you!
    Somehow though, you should try to work through these ideas you have of yourself, or anorexia or other problems might arise due to your feelings about your physical self.

    I personally don't have any of these views of myself. I don't particularly mind how I look now (I think I'm "cute"), so I'm pretty sure I'll be in love with myself once I get to my ultimate goal weight. :)
  • Panda_Rolls
    Panda_Rolls Posts: 101 Member
    A lot of people seem to get the idea in their head that if they lose weight they'll be happy and all their other problems will just disappear. Seeing a professional is really the best advice I think anyone can give you. The only thing I have to add is if you aren't working out regularly, then start doing that. My mood improved dramatically once I really started working out.
  • 0somuchbetter0
    0somuchbetter0 Posts: 1,335 Member
    It doesn't sound like your happiness is directly related to your weight. Listen to the others, get professional help. Start by talking to a doctor, your parents, a teacher.
  • Pixi_Rex
    Pixi_Rex Posts: 1,676 Member
    Probably a good idea to get professional help.

    This is the best advice anyone can give you.
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    i find that a lot of people feel better about themselves when they focus less on what they look like more on what they can DO.
  • breanajune0525
    breanajune0525 Posts: 21
    professional help does seem like a good idea however I had 2 therapist but I felt like I put up these walls and felt almost like I couldn't trust them and they would just tell me what they get paid to say

    I haven't self mutilated in a little over a year(with one set back but very minor)
    I have tried to find friends with not so much luck

    hopefully this time is different.

    thanks for all the advice guys
  • breanajune0525
    breanajune0525 Posts: 21
    I feel lke maybe I compare myself to much to others around me and hether im thin or happy or whatever at the moment, ill automatically feel like crap

    I have a bad habit of doing that...comparing myself to others.. probably a daily thing then I get so self conscious that it hinders me from having a good time
  • Skrib69
    Skrib69 Posts: 687 Member
    professional help does seem like a good idea however I had 2 therapist but I felt like I put up these walls and felt almost like I couldn't trust them and they would just tell me what they get paid to say

    I haven't self mutilated in a little over a year(with one set back but very minor)
    I have tried to find friends with not so much luck

    hopefully this time is different.

    thanks for all the advice guys

    If you are taking on board the advice of professional help, then also take on board finding someone that you can trust. I hope it works out better this time, but it is the best advice available here. Best wishes!
  • lisapr123
    lisapr123 Posts: 863 Member
    Find your confidence not in your weight & size but in your skills & attributes.

    The richer the rest of your life, the less your weight will matter. That's been my experience anyway..... My life is filled with a career I love, friends that rock, family that supports each other thru thick and thin, visits with my 88 yr old grandpa, hobbies that I can't get enough of. My weight is maybe 1% of who I am....so when it goes up or down, it doesn't change my outlook on myself or my life much.
  • tiggerhammon
    tiggerhammon Posts: 2,211 Member
    I can only imagine how you feel. I have never been there and am not going to pretend like I understand.
    For what it is worth, here is my advice:
    First of all, have you ever heard the saying "you can't help those that don't want help?" If you aren't willing to open up to a therapist and let them help you then save your money. It isn't worth going any other way.
    Second, exercise would be super beneficial to you right now either way. Make it a point to even just do a 15 minute speed walk each day. Release your endorphins, get your blood moving and get some fresh air.
    Third, the power of positive thinking/speaking. Look in the mirror each morning and tell yourself you are beautiful, that you are powerful, that you are wonderful just the way God made. I pray one day you believe it.
    Fourth, keep a journal. EVERY day! When you are frustrated, write it down, get it out, spell it all out and let it go. Then shut the book, go to sleep and promise yourself that tomorrow you will start anew. When you are happy, write it down and read it over and over, dog ear that page too. Go back and read the dog earred pages on your down days.
    Fifth, ever heard the "you are what you eat?" Yea, I think it's silly too. But, there is some serious truth buried in that silly saying. Watch what you are eating. Rice Krispie treats for breakfast for snacks? Pop tarts for breakfast? Hot dogs for lunch? All you can eat MSG for dinner? I would be miserable too! Eat from nature as much as possible to feel alive.
    Last, read and indulge in things uplifting. Whether it is self help books, the bible or comedy. Find what works for you. Whatever it is you decide, do this on a regular basis.
    Just my two cents.
  • Healthy1Gregg
    Healthy1Gregg Posts: 8
    I totally agree. Professional help does not have the stigma it used to. People go to personal trainers; nutritionists; doctors for their bodies - to get assistance. Why not go to someone that is trained in emotional self image and psychological issues? I have attended group sessions for my PTSD and also have attended one on one for same and depression - and it is just another tool to get balanced and healthy. A good support system is also helpful. As someone else mentioned - by your pictures you are beautiful - but you are seeing something totally different. Wish you the best

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