I'M NOT OVERWEIGHT BUT I'M STILL FAT, PLEASE ADVISE

Akimajuktuq

As mentioned, you likely would benefit from strength training. However, according to many experienced people, you will not be able to build muscles in a calorie deficit. So start strength training (I do body weight exercises at home), eat more (healthy, nutrient dense food), and be patient. BMI is really a poor indicator of health. You could actually gain weight and yet be healthier and have less fat than you do now once you get into a good strength training routine..

And, it's quite obvious that your perception of yourself is overly critical and needs to be improved. Nothing good comes from hating our bodies. You only get one so love it and treat it with respect. Stop comparing yourself to other people and stop trying to live up to a fake image of perfection. I'm in my 40s too and I'm so done with the self hate. Completely over it.

I don't want to 'live up to a fake image of perfection' I just want to be able to wear shorts in the summer! & with MY legs, I can't
Also, I mentioned, I DO do weights, isn't that 'compound/resistance exercise?

Who is stopping you from wearing shorts? Is it at gun point? You have such negative talk about your body you could never look good enough to be satisfied. No one cares about your legs and if they do then they have their own problems they need to address. You CAN wear shorts if you choose to.

My legs don't look much different than yours, likely worse. I have saggy skin on my thighs because I used to be so heavy and did lots of yo-yoing on conventional diets. I don't care. I wear shorts, skirts, bathing suits. I'll do whatever I want. I love my body. It is healthy and strong and I won't get another one. I regret treating it like crap and hating it for so long.

Really, I'm trying to give you the best advice ever. Love yourself. Respect yourself. Work on your self-dialogue. You are reducing your quality of life for nothing. Improve your health by all means, but forget the putting yourself down. Nothing is gained by self-hate. Forget wasting energy on worrying about what others might be thinking. Life is too short for that.

Get off your high horse, I bet 99% of us on here want to change SOMETHING about ourselves, that's why a lot of us are here, to lose weight, to tone up, to gain muscle etc.

I am so happy for you that you are happy with your 'saggy skin' on your thighs. Not everyone is.

It's seems so insane to me that my posts are taken to be "nasty" and that I am on a "high horse". Striving to want someone else's body, or trying to attain some kind of perfection is such a waste of time. A waste of life. There's nothing wrong with striving to be the best YOU can be, but putting oneself down does NOT help with that. Been there did it, I'm now 40 and know better. Seriously, I was trying to help. Negative talk against oneself does NOTHING to improve appearance or anything else.

And your attempted insult about my legs and my being happy with them: Let me say again: I am 40 (almost 41)!!! And I was severely obese at one time. How would I enrich my life by insulting myself and thinking that I should look like someone else..... who is probably half my age or just an image on tv or in a magazine? I eat healthy food and I strength train, but no, I am never, ever going to have perfect Barbie legs. And I should waste time feeling bad about it? (And should any woman waste their time feeling bad about their body?) Nope. There are bigger issues, such as raising a healthy child and having fun in my life. Sorry to be so shallow. :huh:

BinaryPulsar

I don't think it helps to over react and demand that the OP not feel a certain way and instead feel another way.

She has some valid concerns worth addressing on a fitness site.

But, also it does make sense at the same time to look at things realistically. The Op is not anywhere near fat, but she can still work on reducing her bodyfat percent and building muscle in order to achieve that. And it's always good to take a look and make sure we are not being too hard on ourselves, but we also don't need to accuse people of dysfunction. The Op, does not need to be so hard on herself, but she also does not have dysfunction. This is about her and not any of us.

OP, I already shared some strength training info. I forgot to mention that at your size you should do the strength training while eating at maintenance. That is what I did. I've always been fit as a dancer, but I'm 35, I've had two kids, and I needed to rev up my fitness. So, I started a serious, but completely doable, strength training program, and ate at maintenance. I weigh the same amount, but I am 3 sizes smaller in clothing. But, I will always have a figure with a curvy booty and thighs and I accept and like that. I still want to be as fit as I can be with taking into consideration what is possible and what kind of work I want to put into it. I am also close to your height. You are at an ideal weight, just need to work on body composition. If you build some muscle, your body will be able to shed some fat, be healthy, and not be underweight.

missm1969

So here's the thing. These other people may very well be the same weight as you but have more lean muscle mass whike you have more fat so you will look completely different. That and genetics may just not be on your side when it comes to legs so your going to have to work harder than others for your desired look.

Everyone is right, you need to lower your body fat and increase muscle mass with strength training. Two things caught my eye in your post:

1. You said you've been doing it for a month and don't see any progress. You are probably right. Building muscle is not like losing fat. You can lose 10 pounds a month and really see a difference. Buikding muscle takes a bit longer than that. I wouldn't expect to really visibly see that many changes until 3-6 months out. They are happening, but buikding muscle takes time. AND if your goal is to have smaller, toned legs than you need to get the fat off there. Buikding muscle while having the same amount of fat covering it up is just going to lead you to healthy strong legs but not the petite toned ones I think you are saying you want. That said, you should still do strength training bc even if you remove the fat and still have low muscle mass on your legs than your just going to end up with smaller, skinny fat legs. Which I don't think is what you are shooting for either. Best recommendation I could give you is to go hard strength training for 3-4 months than hit a caloric deficiet. Still lift heavy to preserve your muscle but you'll start losing the fat covering them and be able to show off those legs. It's not a quick process and to get what you really want you may have to go under your ideal weight. I know I know **** isn't fair sometimes with genetics. If you are not down for the long haul with this than just give up now bc there is no instantaneous fix for this.

2. You say you workout your legs 5 days a week? If you are doing your strength training properly than there is no way you'd be able to do that. Load up the weights as heavy as you can do them. Instead of 10-12 reps shoot for 6-8 with 4 to 5 sets where you are struggling to finish your last set. When you can barely walk the next 2 days than you know you've done it right. Keep those working sets while you do your deficit. Once you've happy with the amount of fat you've lost on the deficit then switch over to around 80% of what your working weight was with those 6-8 reps and start shooting for 3-4 sets with 10-12 reps. Also, the exercises you listed are good but your lacking the best 3. Squats, deadlifts, and lunges. Those 3 will do more for those legs than twice as many leg extensions.

missm1969

So here's the thing. These other people may very well be the same weight as you but have more lean muscle mass whike you have more fat so you will look completely different. That and genetics may just not be on your side when it comes to legs so your going to have to work harder than others for your desired look.

Everyone is right, you need to lower your body fat and increase muscle mass with strength training. Two things caught my eye in your post:

1. You said you've been doing it for a month and don't see any progress. You are probably right. Building muscle is not like losing fat. You can lose 10 pounds a month and really see a difference. Buikding muscle takes a bit longer than that. I wouldn't expect to really visibly see that many changes until 3-6 months out. They are happening, but buikding muscle takes time. AND if your goal is to have smaller, toned legs than you need to get the fat off there. Buikding muscle while having the same amount of fat covering it up is just going to lead you to healthy strong legs but not the petite toned ones I think you are saying you want. That said, you should still do strength training bc even if you remove the fat and still have low muscle mass on your legs than your just going to end up with smaller, skinny fat legs. Which I don't think is what you are shooting for either. Best recommendation I could give you is to go hard strength training for 3-4 months than hit a caloric deficiet. Still lift heavy to preserve your muscle but you'll start losing the fat covering them and be able to show off those legs. It's not a quick process and to get what you really want you may have to go under your ideal weight. I know I know **** isn't fair sometimes with genetics. If you are not down for the long haul with this than just give up now bc there is no instantaneous fix for this.

2. You say you workout your legs 5 days a week? If you are doing your strength training properly than there is no way you'd be able to do that. Load up the weights as heavy as you can do them. Instead of 10-12 reps shoot for 6-8 with 4 to 5 sets where you are struggling to finish your last set. When you can barely walk the next 2 days than you know you've done it right. Keep those working sets while you do your deficit. Once you've happy with the amount of fat you've lost on the deficit then switch over to around 80% of what your working weight was with those 6-8 reps and start shooting for 3-4 sets with 10-12 reps. Also, the exercises you listed are good but your lacking the best 3. Squats, deadlifts, and lunges. Those 3 will do more for those legs than twice as many leg extensions.

Thank you so, so much, You've covered everything here! You get what I mean, & now I get it, I don't have enough muscle mass in my legs & that's what I need to work on. I'm defo gonna start doing heavier weights as you suggest, everything you say makes sense. No pain - no gain, I have to work HARDER. And yeah, I get that 1 month isn't long enough. I really appreciate your advice & I'm so glad you took the time. I hope to get back to you by xmas to let you know how I'm getting on lol,
Thanks again