At a wall: Buckle down or lighten up?

duckiec

Started trying to lose weight in January. I’ve lost around 40lbs, and have 20ish to go. I’ve gone from no exercise daily, to 6+ a week- I’m probably the most active/fit I’ve ever been, though there’s still plenty of room for work there.

For most of this year, I’ve been doing okay with food- I usually try to maintain a deficit of 750 cal/day, and currently eat 1400-1500 cals, on good days. Fitbit says I burn 2200 +/- This comes out to TDEE – 70% or so. I was/am often hungry, but progress is rewarding.

Lately, though, I’m just so OVER IT. The number of "bad" food days is increasing. I don’t completely binge those days, but come in with a very slight, if any deficit, sometimes go a bit over TDEE. By the time the weekend comes, I’m so sick of “being good” that I look for any excuse not to be. This weekend I had my first “1000+ over maintenance” day, probably more because I just stopped counting at some point. I used to be able to hold out cheat days/meals for special occasions, make sure I left a little wiggle room the rest of the week if I knew days like that were coming up, etc. Now, one “bad” day becomes an excuse to have another, “I’ll get back on it tomorrow.” Out of nowhere, my resolve has disappeared, it’s like I’m a newbie all over again.

I’m keeping up with my exercise, and not letting that slip at all, this is really about the food. Going to restauarants and getting a grilled chicken salad, no cheese, no dressing, no croutons, no fun, AGAIN. I’m frustrated, I’m agitated, I’m not in any way a happy camper and my family often suffers the wrath of my bad mood. It’s constant, and overwhelming. I’m going to mental extremes, which isn’t sustainable. Scale is moving very slowly, partially, I’m sure, because I’m not maintaining a deficit daily (and when I don’t, those are pretty carb-heavy days).

So, what to do from here, because this is not working. Besides go back in time when I was rocking this....
• Eat at TDEE for awhile. A week? More? Take a break until I can recommit fully (afraid I won’t ever, though, just to avoid this cloud over my head).
• Suck it up, buttercup, nobody said it was easy.
• Chill out; back off the deficit a bit, increase calories slightly. Maybe having more wiggle room daily will help with the balance? See what that does to me, weight wise, over a period of time? How long?
• Something I’m not thinking of?

I can’t be the only one to hit this wall. What did you do? If you took a break, was it that much harder to get back in line? What's your timeframe for doing something new to see what the impact is- a month? 2? 3?

Thanks for any input, advice, kick in the pants, etc!

cwolfman13

with only 20 more pounds to go, I'd dial the deficit back...this will also lead to greater adherence. I'd recommend no more than a 20% cut at the very most with only 20 Lbs more to lose...you'd actually probably be better off at a 15% cut. You no longer have the fat stores to maintain large calorie deficits.

endoftheside

For me, it's been very helpful to determine my TDEE at my goal weight. No matter what, I need to average this amount to maintain my goal weight. This number HAS to hold through life events, holidays, emotions, stress, busy times, whatever, or I will not achieve AND maintain my goal.

The losing weight part is just a means to an end and it doesn't have to happen super quickly, so if I want to dip into my deficit a bit for a few days, no big deal. It gives me the freedom to eat a bit of whatever I want on a given day so I don't need to go on a carb bender (I can always fit protein in my day, its the carbs that get out of control). If you gave yourself back 250 a day to get your deficit down to 500, that might give you the extra freedom that you mentally need and reducing the deficit is something you will need to be stepping toward soon anyway as you get closer to goal.

Regarding restaurants and food in general, I don't like to eat food that makes me grumpy. I would rather eat lightly earlier in the day/exercise more and have a heavier restaurant meal that makes me happy, or eat only half, than eat a meal that I am only choosing because it is light. Think about how you are going to eat at restaurants for the rest of your life. I used to get a fried app, soda, steak and loaded baked potato. These days I skip the app and usually choose a sweet potato and fresh steamed veggies with my steak. Some days I might have the bread or soda or dessert, not all of them, and it works for me and doesn't feel like a punishment (dry chicken on plain lettuce would!) Wiring my brain up with the "new me" works for me and keeps me from yo-yoing between "good" and "bad" eating.

I started in January and have lost 40+ with 20+ to go as well! The over it feeling comes and goes but that's just life and I go on with the plan and it gets better. I would try to get it where you aren't hungry as much, that would have to help. :flowerforyou: