Ugh devastated and scared I let it get this far out of hand

MissRed2010

Starting weight: 363

My name is Jess. I've struggled with weight off and on usually post break ups or pregnancies etc. My last relationship ending was the worst. I was engaged to be married and while I took care of his kids and mine worked and went to college both full time he was leading a double life. I ate my feelings. It's been 7 years and I beat myself up for not being over it. I lie to myself and others about not being interested in dating cuz I think who will want me at this current weight. I go to my mom's and she asked me to sit at the table cause she doesn't want me to break her couch. I had all I could do to not cry. I know she doesn't mean to hurt me saying those things. I know too I need to stop making excuses cause now things are too much out of hand. I can't even do dishes or sweep or shower without being short of breath. My son is getting older (15) and I can't even be active with him which I very much miss. I tried ozempic and it made me not eat at all. Losing your appetite at all isn't healthy. My goal right now is to not focus on the weight but to focus instead on moving even a little and eating healthier I think the rest will come. My ultimate goal is to be 230lbs a size 18/20 and improve my breathing and overall health.

yakkystuff

Hey ~ welcome...

I hear the desire for feeling better in your voice and understand.

Focus on your choices, and start choosing things to help you emotionally and to help your body.

Don't snarl it up all together in a big tangled ball.

Don't make 1 choice good or bad and a reason to quit.

De-link everything… 1 meal or snack is just 1 meal or snack. When it is finished, it is over. Do other helpful non-food things until it is time to eat more for your body.

Choose food that nourishes your body and that you also like. Stop at enough, then go do more non-food things.

Repeat. Sleep. Do more tomorrow.

Hang in and keep walking the talk… You get there :)