Losing weight and depression

AryaSnow

Hi! Anybody having problems with depression and losing weight? I have about 10 kg I should lose, but every time I restrict my calories, I fall into a depressed state where I think about how my life sucks in so many ways and there's nothing worth living for. Then I get over it by eating junk food and I feel better for a while, until I realize I'm hurting myself and I'm just getting fatter. I've always been a sad person with many problems, but when I'm not eating enough I feel like going crazy and I'm also taking it out on the people around me. My ex, who was an athlete, was always criticising me, even when I was trying to make changes, saying it wasn't enough or I wasn't doing the right things. My current boyfriend is skinny and he hates fat people. He doesn't really enjoy food and he can't understand why I just need to eat and can't lose weight. I don't want to go to a gym, because I'm afraid of people staring at me/judging me, I can't go running because my city has too many stray dogs who would bark at me/bite me. Sometimes I'm exercising indoors, but most of the time my mood is too bad to do it. Any of you doing through something similar? How did you get over it?

allshebe

OK - your boyfriend doesn't like "fat" people, can't understand why you "need" to eat and he's still your "boyfriend" (WHY is he your boyfriend - what does he see in you and what do you see in him? not sure this sounds like a healthy relationship, though I could be reading something into the situation that's not there)? Have you tried counseling? It sounds like you might have an unhealthy relationship to food. I think you need to find ways to feel better about yourself (from within, not based on external appearance) before you'll be able to fix your eating issues. When you lose weight, you're focusing on what's wrong with your life instead of what's good about it - maybe make a list of all the things that are good in your life and focus on those - if you can't find anything "good", find something that's "bad" that you have the ability to change and make it "better" (I KNOW you can find something, even if it's as "simple" as the wall color or "decor" in your bedroom - be creative - if you can't paint, hang fabric or even sheets on the wall to make a change), then fix the next easiest thing to address, etc.

jade2112

Ya know, you are deserving of a better relationship with a loving person. There is someone out there who will love you unconditionally no matter what your weight is.

Don't have the mindset (if you do) that no one else would want you at your current weight. That simply isn't true.

All be it, you may have to be single for a bit while you find each other. This isn't any different than others, large or small, who have had a breakup. It will happen.

I'm sorry you are depressed about your life and hope you can overcome it. As stated above perhaps you need counseling and perhaps some medication. I suffer from major depression and take medication for it. The medication I take has saved my life.

I wish you the best as well as a happy life.

pennysteed

Arya, I have suffered from depression most of my life and unfortunately now have more than 10kg to lose, Here is my advice to you. Lose weight for you, not anyone else. If your BF loves you, your body will not matter, thankfully my husband does not judge me, which is a good thing since I do enough self judging for both of us. I can understand the fear of going outside to walk/jog, so if you can join a gym, do it. This is what one friend told me and I always tell myself when I am self-conscience. You might have a few kg to lose, but at least you know it and are doing something about it. Go to the gym for you, after a few weeks you will find yourself looking forward to that time. As for losing weight and limiting yourself. All you need is a 500cal per day deficient. You can either do with all exercise, all food, or a better bet split it between the two. 250 cals is not a lot, and burning 250 cals at the gym is actually easier than it sounds. By doing this, it might actually be more manageable for you. Once you start exercising, your depression should start lifting as well. Good luck and do not lose faith in yourself.