In need of some major support...

tdugger_resa
tdugger_resa Posts: 3
in Introduce Yourself
Ok I'm not sure how to begin but let's see.....I'm 26, I've been overweight as long as I can remember. I've tried every diet with some success until I either sabotage myself or stop seeing results and then I get bummed and quit. I am also a secret binge eater which is never a good thing. It's a vicious cycle that I'm finally ready to end. Today I signed up to begin this new journey and as I sit here I realize that this is really my only means of support. My family will say they are supportive but then make comments that are truly negative even when they think they are being helpful and it just makes thing worse. For example, "Hey I lost 4 lbs this week" and the response I get is "well keep going you have a lot more to lose". That is not helpful because I know what I have to lose, I don't need to be reminded of this constantly (my body does enough of that)! So I'm not even going to tell them what I am doing and just wait until they start noticing results and just say I'm eating better. I wish i could say I have some friends to include in this but due to past experiences/circumstances/choices my friend pool is severely limited. I'm basically starting over in life I believe and honestly I think it's about time to rejoin the world and have a positive outlook on life.

Because of this, I am reaching out to the online community here for support and encouragement. I have a lot of weight to lose unfortunately so I'll take all the advice, good vibes, friends, etc that I can get from this so that I have the best chance at succeeding.

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Replies

  • Kariann986
    Kariann986 Posts: 9 Member
    Try to ignore the sarcastic comments. Just repeat it to yourself! Four pounds is four pounds, after all! :)
  • blackdoggage
    blackdoggage Posts: 5 Member
    have you considered weight loss surgery?
  • earvizu92
    earvizu92 Posts: 320 Member
    Welcome and congrats on taking the first step in a healthier you!!!!!!!!!! Feel free to add me, lots of positivity here!! :flowerforyou:
  • JanLeb
    JanLeb Posts: 297 Member
    HI there!

    Remember you are doing this for you and you can do it. There will be days when you just want to give up but you need to remember you are worth it and you can do it!

    I don't have all the answers, I als have tried every 'diet' out there with some success only to fall back into old habits. This time I am making a lifestyle change and want to be healthy not just thin. I am discovering half the battle is having the right mind set and the rest is putting it all into action.

    Feel free to add me to be an online friend for support and motivation!

    I wish you the best and remember not to listen to all the negative comments!!!!
  • ShaSimone
    ShaSimone Posts: 270 Member
    sent you a friend request.
  • cl_green
    cl_green Posts: 30
    I agree - work your butt off and then SHOW them what you DID! They'll notice! :happy:
  • the1coordinator
    the1coordinator Posts: 3 Member
    Yay, you! Try concentrating on when you feel good. You can even say "Yay, me!" whenever you pass up that tempting sweet or walk those extra steps. I did this the other day and it felt much better than the little voice that was calling me "fat girl" 10 days ago. Every little thing counts. Log every day. I'm 10 days into this, and I cannot believe what a difference it makes logging things in. If I know I'm going to have to log a food (particularly a not-so-healthy one), I usually make a different choice. This is for YOU, not your family. Some people just don't know how to praise or be supportive. Let it go. Good for you that you didn't wait another day to make this happen. We'll support you. You. Can. Do. It. :happy:
  • jmp1958
    jmp1958 Posts: 24 Member
    Congratulations on taking the first steps!!

    http://strongbrees.blogspot.com/2013/09/motivation-monday.html
  • FizikallyFit
    FizikallyFit Posts: 180 Member
    Congrats on your new life. We can definitely lend support and motivation on here. But I don't think it compares to real life friends who help motivate and support you or exercise with you. In addition to this I recommend joining a group or gym that offers classes with like minded people and make "accountabilabuddies" through them! Also remember a change starts from within, so in order to succeed you try making changes there first. :heart:

    Best of Luck =D
  • dantanjah
    dantanjah Posts: 100 Member
    Welcome to MFP and congrats on getting started. Feel free to add me as a friend. I am sending you positive thoughts.
  • helena_jj
    helena_jj Posts: 200 Member
    I decided not to tell anybody I started dieting again, as I don't like all the attetion. And 4 lbs per week is a great result! You can add me if you want. :)
  • tdugger_resa
    tdugger_resa Posts: 3
    Thank you all for your support. It's going to be a long journey but I'm ready for the battle.
  • tdugger_resa
    tdugger_resa Posts: 3
    Personally to me, surgery isn't an option. I know there are pros and cons to it but it's not something I would even consider.
  • skchilders
    skchilders Posts: 20 Member
    I'm friendly and overweight :) Add away! I
  • Pangea250
    Pangea250 Posts: 965 Member
    Friend me!
  • megbee617
    megbee617 Posts: 100 Member
    Hey girlie,

    I sent you a friend request. I am 25, and like you, I have been overweight my whole life. I have also suffered a lot of the same comments you get... people criticizing your weight but at the same time not helping you or motivating you to do so.

    I think its a great thing that you're doing. Trust me, it has not been easy, and it's not going to be easy. You have to make these changes... small at first, and then bigger, in order to see results. You will have weeks where you dieted and excersized your butt off for nothing, and then you'll have weeks where you think "I gained for sure", but you actually lost! Remember, this is a lifestyle thing and regardless of what the number on the scale says, you are doing wonders for your body from within!! I've been on MFP for almost a year and only have lost about 20lbs but man, I FEEL so much better! And you will too once you start seeing results and stick with it! I wish you the best of luck!
  • Susieq_1994
    Susieq_1994 Posts: 5,361 Member
    This isn't my blog but I find his blogs extremely inspiring, so check it out!! http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/beingkevin
  • charleyreedto175
    charleyreedto175 Posts: 60 Member
    The only person that you do this for is you. The only critic you should have is you. Don't put value on what others say. You journey will have bumps, road blocks and a few hic-ups. So what. Work small goals to get to the big goal. No short cuts. Bypass, weight loss pills and everything else is just a load of garbage if you don't want to change. Find your inner you and rock on. You can add me at any time.
  • shaydon80
    shaydon80 Posts: 138 Member
    Any loss is a good loss as long as you're moving in the right direction. My best advice is eat less and move more. :)
    Good luck!!!
  • nolanerinbryon
    nolanerinbryon Posts: 80 Member
    Hey girl,
    Congrats on getting started - often times, getting to that point can be pretty tough. Be sure you're doing it for the right reasons; for yourself and not for others. The changes are often within so perhaps consider doing some soul searching and/or consulting a professional to talk through what may be causing you to binge eat. You deserve to be healthy and feel wonderful about yourself!

    Also, it sounds like you're prepared to make some big changes in the coming days/weeks/months ahead so do yourself a favor. Take a bunch of before pictures from several angles (in your clingy workout clothing) and take body measurements. Often times the pictures and the measurements are great illustration of success (because sometimes the scale isn't a good indicator). I started my journey just over 9 months ago and I had plateaued for 2-3 months over the summer but the inches were still coming off. Just a thought for you to consider so you can see your hard work pay off :)

    Feel free to add me - I am on daily (246 days & counting!) and would be happy to support you along the way. Good luck!
  • monjacq1964
    monjacq1964 Posts: 291 Member
    you are awesome!!! 4 lbs is amazing! Celebrate your successes.
  • Bownzi
    Bownzi Posts: 423 Member
    You can do this... Keep positive..you will get there..
  • monjacq1964
    monjacq1964 Posts: 291 Member
    have you considered weight loss surgery?

    This!! i had weight loss surgery 2.5 years ago, lost 130lbs. I'm trying to get that last 20 or so off, but it gave me a boost to get the first 130.
  • steve2kay
    steve2kay Posts: 194 Member
    I read this recently "what others think of me is none of my business" - while I know it isn't this straight forward I kind of liked it, it reminded me that I can't change what people think - but then I'm not doing this for those people.

    Good luck - feel free to add me.
  • krmullig
    krmullig Posts: 43 Member
    Good for you!! All that matters is your heading in the right direction and doing this to better yourself! Just remember that this is for YOU and no one else. Feel free to add, I love new friends and I'll be here to chat if you need :)
  • missnerdylady
    missnerdylady Posts: 3
    Missourian high five! Added you. I'll be your supportive friend!
  • thesophierose
    thesophierose Posts: 754 Member
    You are beautiful and strong!! You've got this girl!!
  • sheilahealth167
    sheilahealth167 Posts: 4 Member
    Great job on getting started and making up your mind! I read a lot of these posts and they are all very good and very true. My thought for you AND me is persistence. Every day, Every day. Do the best you can every day. If I can figure it out, I'll send you a friend request. What are you "plans" for eating?
  • Velum_cado
    Velum_cado Posts: 1,608 Member
    have you considered weight loss surgery?

    It sounds like it might be more helpful to the OP to make a lifestyle change before leaping into surgery, don't you think?
  • foxless10
    foxless10 Posts: 1
    Sorry for the long diatribe, but I've had some success and want to help if I can. You've already decided to listen to yourself, you just need to listen to others a little less. Some weeks you will lose 4 pounds, some only one. Some weeks I actually think I gained a pound or two. I found that it helped to visualize the weight I'd lost by picking up a 4 lb roast and the grocery store and knowing that I was no longer lugging that roast around my stomach.

    Unless they ask, don't talk to your family about the weight loss. I found that the people who were most helpful were people that were also trying to lose weight. Pick one or two people at home, at work or on this website that you can check in with that will celebrate your loses and support you if you gain

    Also, keep that diary -- it's especially helpful for binge eating! If you know you'll have to put it in writing, it will discourage you from starting. Also, stay away from food in bags and boxes that you can eat without really keeping track. To compensate for the binge eating you are not going to do, you can do something else. I always kept a hundred or so calories for the end of the day when I would treat myself to some skinny cow ice cream or other sweet (my achilles heal). Finally, set both a final goal range and some short term goals. Good luck.

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