Hard stuff - need prayers, well wishes, anything I can get!!

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MontanaGirl
MontanaGirl Posts: 1,251 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
OK guys, I'm going to take a big risk here. Need some support. My dh and I have just been through an incredibly tough year, following two really tough years before that. Last year, we had 3 deaths in our immediate family - 2 were dh's aunts, both of whom he was very close to. One was actually more of a mother to him than his own mother was - even by his own mother's admission! So, we have been stressed out to the max, plus have had a lot of financial stress. Anywho - today he is picking up the check for our portion of the sell of his aunts house - the one who basically raised him. I know this is going to pull up stuff for him. I'm already stressed and have a hard time responding to his "stuff" because of starting to get really busy at work, financial difficulty, 12 year old daughter with ADD, my own grief over the loss of my son last year (even though I had placed him for adoption - it was an open adoption. He was only 18).

So . . . long story long :laugh: After serious financial difficulty we are about to have abundance - but due to the death of his fav aunt. Hard to reconcile all that! Plus we have been fighting - very close to divorce. Need to come back together and push through this - but not sure how. So any prayers, well wished, etc., you could send my way would be appreciated. God bless you all!!
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Replies

  • MontanaGirl
    MontanaGirl Posts: 1,251 Member
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    OK guys, I'm going to take a big risk here. Need some support. My dh and I have just been through an incredibly tough year, following two really tough years before that. Last year, we had 3 deaths in our immediate family - 2 were dh's aunts, both of whom he was very close to. One was actually more of a mother to him than his own mother was - even by his own mother's admission! So, we have been stressed out to the max, plus have had a lot of financial stress. Anywho - today he is picking up the check for our portion of the sell of his aunts house - the one who basically raised him. I know this is going to pull up stuff for him. I'm already stressed and have a hard time responding to his "stuff" because of starting to get really busy at work, financial difficulty, 12 year old daughter with ADD, my own grief over the loss of my son last year (even though I had placed him for adoption - it was an open adoption. He was only 18).

    So . . . long story long :laugh: After serious financial difficulty we are about to have abundance - but due to the death of his fav aunt. Hard to reconcile all that! Plus we have been fighting - very close to divorce. Need to come back together and push through this - but not sure how. So any prayers, well wished, etc., you could send my way would be appreciated. God bless you all!!
  • memaw66
    memaw66 Posts: 2,558 Member
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    I'm sorry to hear of all the hardships. You are in my prayers.

    Memaw
  • GinaB30
    GinaB30 Posts: 725 Member
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    First off (((((((((BIG FREAKIN HUGE HUGS)))))))))))))))
    Goodness, that is a lot to deal with, no wonder you are all stressed!
    I find the best thing for me is to get alone time and pray and read some psalms to help calm the mind and just feel better.
    I'll say a prayer for you right this minute and for your husband, I really hope you two can come together and deal with things rather than turn outside of yourselves...
  • chriss1tt
    chriss1tt Posts: 365 Member
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    I wish you the best and you will be in my prayers. Hope all works out well.:heart:
  • 5KNohno
    5KNohno Posts: 503
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    Definitely will be praying for you and your family. Don't feel like you have to be strong enough to do it alone. If you need help, there's no shame in going to marriage counseling who can help view things from different perspective or a financial counselor to help you make wise decisions with the inheritance. Know it will be hard, but hang in there. Coming through the hard times together will only make your bond stronger. Wow, I'm impressed with how well you are doing with your weight loss with all that's going on in your life. Keep up the good work. We are all here for you if you ever need to vent.:flowerforyou:
  • teetsel4
    teetsel4 Posts: 288 Member
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    Two good reads.... The Seven Habbits of Highly Effective Families and The proper care and feeding of husbands.

    Going thru these hard times together is a part of life, but what you do with them and how you come out the other side is a part of mariage.

    All the best to you. :flowerforyou:
  • MontanaGirl
    MontanaGirl Posts: 1,251 Member
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    Thanks all!! - Also meant to add on (got too emotional :ohwell: ) that the exercise thing has kinda petered out and the eating thing isn't so good. I go from eating way under one day (especially if we are fighting) to going overboard the next. I still seem to be losing, but want to stay healthy anyway!! Exercise helps with the stress - when I'm not too tired to get up :smile: Anyhow - thanks all!! I really appreciate the prayers and well wishes. I feel them already :flowerforyou:
  • rayneenie
    rayneenie Posts: 177 Member
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    My Thoughts and Prayers are with you. Hope you can feel the hugs over the distance.:flowerforyou:
  • sgtinvincible
    sgtinvincible Posts: 2,559
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    MG, you are in my prayers. :heart:
  • icandoit
    icandoit Posts: 4,163 Member
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    I am so sorry :heart: You are in my thoughts and my prayers. :heart:
  • msarro
    msarro Posts: 2,748 Member
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    *big hugs*

    First, my condolances, and I really hope that things work out great for you.


    As an aside, about money...
    This is going to sound strange, but use part of that money to get a financial advisor. Being broke can put HUGE strains on relationships. If you're used to being broke, your first instinct is going to be to spend and spend and spend. That's why a lot of people who win the lottery tend to end up much worse financially than they started, and that strain on your relationship will be back in full force.
  • doglvr_75
    doglvr_75 Posts: 144
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    I will be praying for you, MG :flowerforyou:
  • Healthier_Me
    Healthier_Me Posts: 5,600 Member
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    You've been through so much MG but GOD has special plans for you & your family.
    Put everything in his hands and you'll get through it.
    I wish you the best of luck.

    ~Joanna:flowerforyou:
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
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    I will pray for God to guide you all through this difficult time!

    Hug!
    Tami
  • MontanaGirl
    MontanaGirl Posts: 1,251 Member
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    *big hugs*

    First, my condolances, and I really hope that things work out great for you.


    As an aside, about money...
    This is going to sound strange, but use part of that money to get a financial advisor. Being broke can put HUGE strains on relationships. If you're used to being broke, your first instinct is going to be to spend and spend and spend. That's why a lot of people who win the lottery tend to end up much worse financially than they started, and that strain on your relationship will be back in full force.

    I appreciate that piece of advice. We have spend several hours very carefully structuring how and what we are going to with the money just because of that!!! Fortunately, we will get the $ from the house now (today) and the rest of the estate will settle in early June. About equal amounts. We did leave play around money, just cuz we need to do that, but some will be saved for income taxes - will be a first for me!! And we are buying cows for the ranch and sheep and some equipment. Will pay off all our debt - not too much thankfully!! And play some - can't wait to go hiking and take a vacation this fall. But, we have sought advice and counsel on that part of it and feel like we are being wise with the funds - I insisted because I knew if we didn't plan in advance we would just blow it all :grumble:
  • MontanaGirl
    MontanaGirl Posts: 1,251 Member
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    You guys are so awesome!!! :heart: :heart:

    You all really don't know how much I needed this today! :flowerforyou: Thank you so much!!
  • dragonscapes24
    dragonscapes24 Posts: 114
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    Hang in there Montana Girl... If you believe in God he will answer your prayers somehow... maybe not as you expect but in the end he will lead you to your path... as for the eating and exercising... try taking a walk when you are feeling stressed... take your man with you... even if you are getting away from an argument take him along... it's amazing what a little fresh air and sunshine can do to clear your head and the air...

    Good luck
    Jenn
  • Beccilynn
    Beccilynn Posts: 177
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    Firstly, You have great courage to reach out to people that you probaly dont even know , it takes a great humbleness to reach out and ask for help , and not just hold it in , so give yourself credit for that...
    Walk slowly and breath deeply, think about your choices slowly, have the greatest compassion and forgiveness, KNOW and trust that EVERYthing you go through on your life adventure is always the right one , every choice you make is the right one , the only wrong choice is the one you DO NOT make, keep your head high,follow your heart & soul and not your mind, do not hold judgements and be patient... I sincerely send out good vibrations in this universe for you , that your path will be cleared for you and choices will be seen easiely, sometimes when we focus on all the negative , it is hard to see the answers and opportunities that lye in front of us
    ~Becci~



    Be of good cheer. Do not think of today's failures, but of the success that may come tomorrow. You have set yourselves a difficult task, but you will succeed if you persevere; and you will find joy in overcoming obstacles. Remember, no effort that we make to attain something beautiful is ever lost.

    Helen Keller





    Life is an opportunity, benefit from it.
    Life is beauty, admire it.
    Life is bliss, taste it.
    Life is a dream, realize it.
    Life is a challenge, meet it.
    Life is a duty, complete it.
    Life is a game, play it.
    Life is a promise, fulfill it.
    Life is sorrow, overcome it.
    Life is a song, sing it.
    Life is a struggle, accept it.
    Life is a tragedy, confront it.
    Life is an adventure, dare it.
    Life is luck, make it.
    Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
    Life is life, fight for it.


    Mother Teresa
  • mablesyrup
    mablesyrup Posts: 286 Member
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    You are in my prayers! Usually once a week we fast in my family for whoever needs it. TOmorrow is our 'fasting day' and I am adding you to our list of why we are fasting! Hang in there!
  • GravyGurl
    GravyGurl Posts: 1,070
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    :flowerforyou: thoughts and prayers are with you and yours. Baby steps.

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