Hello...I am so lost and scared

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  • RavenaRae
    RavenaRae Posts: 16 Member
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    Welcome to MFP! Admitting you need help and asking for it can be very difficult. Congrats on taking the first big step in your weight loss journey!!

    It sounds like you're aware of at least some of your health issues but your lack of energy and falling asleep all the time really got my attention. I have always been a high energy person but for the last year or so have been feeling the same as you. It didn't matter how much sleep I got it was never enough. And my lack of motivation was scaring me. I finally was able to see an endocrinologist and after running many tests we found that I was Vitamin D deficient. It's taken a few weeks of over the counter supplements but I'm finally starting to feel better.

    If they haven't already, have your doctor test you for Vitamin D deficiency. It's becoming very widespread since more time is spent indoors and even if outdoors Vitamin D from the sun is blocked by sunscreen. Research is finding that Vitamin D affects a lot more than just bones and energy is a big one. I've been told that most doctors do not initially test for it, that you have to ask them to test for it.

    Also, I'm assuming you are on meds for your thyroid since you know it's unresponsive but maybe they need to adjust it? It could be causing some of the symptoms your experiencing as well.

    Feel free to add me as a friend if you would like.

    Best of luck! I know you can do it!!
    Ravéna
  • AglaeaC
    AglaeaC Posts: 1,974 Member
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    Most has been said what I would say, but another welcome and you can do it won't hurt. Getting healthier begins in the kitchen like Varda said and I would check the thyroid values, too. Good luck, hang in there and keep posting!
  • doc19822
    doc19822 Posts: 83 Member
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    i have been scaring myself with some of the thought I have been having. the other night I was actually thinking about tking a knife and cutting away the fat, getting in there and tking out hand full of fat. How insane is that? I would not do it, but the thot has occured a few times.
  • doc19822
    doc19822 Posts: 83 Member
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    Oh and if anyone would like to check out my radio shows, please send me a private message, I would not want to force it on anyone. I will send you the times and the links
  • Soapstone
    Soapstone Posts: 134 Member
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    You can do it! I haven't been exactly in your shoes, but I can say that I am also a smoker struggling with the habit. I've NEVER been a gym person, until a month ago. I still smoke (sometimes on the way to the gym), but I know I'll be able to let them go as I gradually get deeper into my new lifestyle. All in good time. For YEARS I believed that I couldn't do any real exercise because I am a smoker. It isn't true., I run 6 days a week now at the gym. When I started I sweated, HARD, walking at 3 mph and running for 15 second intervals. It was hard. Sometimes I would get in my car afterward and cry. It was humiliating at first, except that I knew I could get better. Feeling like I might go just a little faster, a little longer, the next day motivated me to come back. I'm still a slow runner- but I'm running! I was NEVER athletic. Ever.
    It's changed my whole conception of myself.
    If you let the cigs go now, do it. If you can't, don't let it hold you back from making other changes in your life. Don't make the same mistake I did. I thought I had to quit BEFORE I could change anything else. It isn't true! Do what you feel you can do, right now. If the cigs go later, they go later.
    Good luck, my friend, and know that we're all sending love and positive thoughts your way! YOU GOT THIS!
  • redladywitch
    redladywitch Posts: 799 Member
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    One day at a time. One hour at a time. One minute at a time. I believe in you. You can do it!

    I remember when it took me two minutes to walk twenty feet! I was out of breath and very weak. You can add me as a friend on MFP if you want.

    You have to be patient with your body right now. Control what you can. You can control what you eat and how you eat. Eat some healthier food and control your portions. I don't care if it's an apple or a tomato. That is how I started.

    You've taken the first step. Congratulations. Keep logging. Keep coming back to MFP every day. It will get better.
  • Soapstone
    Soapstone Posts: 134 Member
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    I wanted to add- you've lost 75 pounds!?? That's wonderful, and a huge success! See your doctor and get some of your medical issues straightened out, ask the doc what sort of exercise you can do safely, and keep after it! I'm really inspired by your progress, considering the obstacles currently in your path; they're surmountable, just keep at it! :)
  • CyberEd312
    CyberEd312 Posts: 3,536 Member
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    Bump (Mike I am on the road but will reply later when I get home.... hang in there.....)
  • operator646
    operator646 Posts: 155 Member
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    doc19822 Believe me, there is always hope. I was in a similar situation not even 2 years ago. I am 56 yrs old and weighed 346 lbs and had many of the same health concerns, including sleep apnea, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes, asthma and l extreme pain in legs and feet. After 3 years of contemplating I decided to have bariatric surgery. I got the gastric sleeve last July and it is the best thing I could have done for myself.
    I never thought in a million years that I could feel this good and I still have more that 50 pounds to go. Not all of my symptoms have gone away, but no longer have apnea, good blood pressure, no pain and only 1 insulin injection instead of 4.
    You may not be a candidate for bariatric surgery or not be interested which I respect. However, the best thing that came out of this was all that I have learned and am still learning. You can certainly learn also. I decided to follow up with therapy to address the addiction I have to food, because that is an ongoing problem for me. It took awhile but it is really helping. Also, finding support from others who share similar concerns makes a world of difference in staying focused.
    Have you gotten a calorie goal from a doctor or nutritionist? Pre-surgery I was at 1500 calories a day and found so many yummy things to help me stay full and not go without. I would be happy to share what they were if interested. Since you are like me and have lots to loose, you will be amazed how cutting back on the calories even if not that many will start you losing..
    I wish you well and much success
  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
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    Tons of people on here have been in the same shoes as you. I've seen some lose hundreds of lbs so you can do this too. Feel free to send me a friends request if you want. I think the more friends you get on here to better. Good luck!
  • purple180
    purple180 Posts: 130 Member
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    Wishing you the very best. Please know that you can do it, just take it one day at a time. If you have a bad day know that tomorrow is a NEW day to start fresh. YOU CAN DO THIS. :-)
  • doc19822
    doc19822 Posts: 83 Member
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    My mother had the surgery back in the late 70's. Back then they called it stomach stapling...and she actually blew out her staples once and had to have it redone. After wards i remember her drinking Ensure. We had it by the case. The rest of her life she had problems. Lose bowls where she would eat lots of cheese to help bind things up. She died in 98, actually had a number of anyurisms in her stomach..and one blew. I could be wrong, but I believe they were caused by the stapling. Plus I am on South Carolina medicade. They would not help me take care of teeth that had broken off exposing the nerve and roots, I doubt if they would accept any type of surgery.
  • doc19822
    doc19822 Posts: 83 Member
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    the link you shared is dead
  • doc19822
    doc19822 Posts: 83 Member
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    Hi Michael!

    You can do this. Make this man your friend here on my fitness pal: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/thedean1td1. He used to weigh over 700 pounds, now he's your weight. If he can't inspire you, check your pulse. And make me your friend and soyum who also responded. Search the message boards to find friends who are or were at the same starting weight as you and are at various stages of loss, from just starting to already there. Some of my best inspirations on mfp are the ones who have been sticking to it for two years and more. Having friends on mfp has really made a difference for me.

    Make sure your diary is visible because that's one of the ways others can help keep us in line. And be ruthlessly honest with yourself in your diary because your body is being ruthlessly honest with you. You may have heard the adage, what we eat in private, we wear in public. The only person we are fooling is ourselves, and only in our head because the rest of our body is not fooled, so be honest.

    Congratulations on joining!
    Sonia

    The link you shared is dead
  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
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    You don't need surgery, too dangerous. You can do this just log all your food and try to walk a minute or two for a start.
  • NikiChicken
    NikiChicken Posts: 576 Member
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    My name is Michael, I am 48 (49 in october) and i weigh 465 pounds. I have no energy, I can abrly stand for more than 5 mintues at a time. Walking even a short distance will flare up my siactic nerve and I am all but usless for days after. I am disabled, home bound for the msot part. Can no longer drive, and the enarest town is 15 miles away. I feel like I am in prison. I get bored and I eat. i get depressed and i eat. I read a book and I eat. I do not know if there is any hope for me? I do suffer from sleep apnea. My thyroid is un responsive and I have high blood preasure. My sugar & Cholestrol are both good for now. But I have bene suffering from bouts of low blood sugar. is there hope? I do not know what to do..but I am desperate.I amhaving a hard time staying awake. I will drift off to sleep even when i really do not want to. i have no energy, feels like everything is a fight. My house is a mess..I want to clean but there is jsut no energy. Please help me

    There is always hope Michael. My heart goes out to you.

    First of all, address today for today. Just TODAY make good decisions. Then do that over tomorrow and then the next day and the next and so on. Don't look at the big picture, just focus on today. At least for me, focusing on the here and now instead of the big picture makes this so much more doable. I can get through today!

    You lose weight in the kitchen and get fit in the gym. So, if you can't walk or exercise for now, focus on what you CAN do and that's eating healthier. Log everything you want to eat BEFORE you eat it and make the conscious decision of whether or not you want to spend your calories on it. In my opinion, worry only about your total calories for now. You can focus on the other macros later after you get more comfortable with just counting calories. Then, after you have gotten used to counting calories and have lost a few pounds making mobility easier, then you can start adding in exercise.

    I'm not saying not to exercise. Exercise is great for everything from helping you lose weight to lifting your depression and the more you exercise the more you CAN exercise! I'm just saying that if you don't think you can exercise right now, it's still absolutely possible to lose weight and you should focus on the things you can do!

    Good luck to you. There are a lot of successful people on here who started in similar places to you. Read through the posts and blogs and ask questions and get inspiration. You can do this. Just one day at a time!
  • Kadoober
    Kadoober Posts: 289 Member
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    The link included the . at the end of the sentence, which killed the link.

    Try:

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/thedean1td1.com

    :)
  • Jonslife
    Jonslife Posts: 19 Member
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    I understand how you feel. Food has been part of everything I do. The good part is it is all habitual which means it is something that you can make a point to change. What I really wanted to touch on was the sleep apnea.

    If you are not on a CPAP device, get on one. It will change your life. You will regain a lot of energy, your body will start to heal, and you will be on one of the best first steps to loosing weight.

    I was diagnosed as waking up more then 120 times an hour, that is 2 times a minute. Even with my weight, the difference, on the machine, is amazing. Before the cpap I could sleep for 12 hours, wake up, and fall asleep sitting on the side of the bed. I would fall asleep sitting at my desk, I could barely watch tv or read for extended periods of time.

    I am not sure where you live, but there are many really good doctor supervised medical weight loss clinics in most major metropolitan areas. Even some that you can do remotely.

    I would also recommend looking into the HMR at home program. Feel free to add me as a friend, I would love to chat with you about some of the things I've discovered and ways in which we can help motivate each other.
  • michellechawner
    michellechawner Posts: 892
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    Hi Michael!

    I do understand where you are coming from, but on a different aspect... the scared and lost aspect!

    When I was heavier, starting was scary. But you eventually either try and change, or start prepping for your funeral. It becomes a will to live, or taking the easy way out and just letting it spiral out of control. There is hope for everyone, no matter what their walk of life.

    Most days, with my own health issues, I have to take it hour by hour. Start out slow. Even if you aren't walking, you say you can barely stand for 5 minutes. So tomorrow aim for 6 minutes! and once 6 feels fine, try for 7! Little by little...

    The big picture is scary for any of us, but taking it one day at a time, or even hour by hour, minute by minute, is much easier and makes it seem more doable.

    Drink plenty of water. Listen to your body.
  • doc19822
    doc19822 Posts: 83 Member
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    I wanted to add- you've lost 75 pounds!?? That's wonderful, and a huge success! See your doctor and get some of your medical issues straightened out, ask the doc what sort of exercise you can do safely, and keep after it! I'm really inspired by your progress, considering the obstacles currently in your path; they're surmountable, just keep at it! :)
    No i have not lost 75 pounds. Not sure what I did wrong, but that's not true

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