People who request "motivated" friend.

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13

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  • professorRAT
    professorRAT Posts: 690 Member
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    I get zero inspiration or motivation from people saying "wtg", "nice work", "good job" every time I log my food. I really don't understand how anyone is truly motivated by this behavior and I never will. What helps me is to have people around that can exchange information from time to time regarding diet/fitness. So, what motivates some people may be different than others, but that doesn't mean they can't be helpful to you on your "journey :sick: ". I guess I hope the people on my FL understand this and allow me to be me. Anyone who asks me a question or asks for my opinion on something gets very thoughtful feedback. To me, that is how to best help "motivate" others (true motivation comes from within).
  • GlassslippersAndFairyDust
    GlassslippersAndFairyDust Posts: 518 Member
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    I would love to have a few new friends........cheer leading is not necessary but a conversation every once in a while is appreciated. :flowerforyou:
  • JDavid007
    JDavid007 Posts: 331 Member
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    Heck yes. I do my very best to leave feedback to all of my friends that are active. I have some that never give any back but I know sometimes life gets us down. I usually drop those who are inactive and never support. I give them plenty of time because we all want to succeed.
  • TheEffort
    TheEffort Posts: 1,028 Member
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    Nice post OP.
  • love9705
    love9705 Posts: 478 Member
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    I totally agree and that is why I try and be as motivating as I can because it feels good when you see a W2G!!!! or a Nice burn. We are all on this journey together!!
  • TheBitSlinger
    TheBitSlinger Posts: 621 Member
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    I expect my friends to send me cash. So far, I'm disappointed with everyone of them.
  • Steph_in_Mississippi
    Steph_in_Mississippi Posts: 70 Member
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    I'm rather new the the message boards here but I've seen several threads asking people to friend them because they need inspirational or motivated friends or they need people to help them stay on track. I have added several people because I feel like I am a very motivated person or we have soem of the same interests and I was hoping that if I would be motivating these "new" friends, they'd do the same in return. That is not the case.

    I guess what I'm getting at is if you are asking for motivation and friends to cheer you on and tell you how great and awesome you are, expect your friends would like the same in return. Just saying....



    Totally agree!
  • claire3083
    claire3083 Posts: 14
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    my names claire. i too like being friends with people who are motivational and i try my best to be motivational back... (: itll show im new to mfp but i had to make a new account because my old one got deactivated for some reason... feel free to add me as a friend and we can motivate eachother... (:

    something a little about me i have lost 30 lbs exactly in 4 months! its amazing what u can do whenever you put your heart into it
  • osothefinn
    osothefinn Posts: 163 Member
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    I equate the plea for 'motivated friends' to my 15 year old daughter and her 'quest' for friends on Facebook........

    She has almost 2000 'Friends'.........

    But she doesn't even really KNOW half of these people..........!

    It's a 'status' thing - the more 'friends' you have, the 'cooler' you are...........

    I prefer to do my 'thing' - watch what i eat, exercise.........

    This is no 'friend-quest' for me.....

    Sigh - I'm SO un-cool.............!

    I must be uncool too. I've added a couple people, but when I actually tried to suggest maybe a sack of candy as a bedtime snack is counterproductive they got all butthurt and unfriended me, so I gave up.
  • osothefinn
    osothefinn Posts: 163 Member
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    I found that once I stopped relying on other people to help me, and just made myself do it on my own, it worked a lot better.

    This. So much this.
  • debilang
    debilang Posts: 874 Member
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    I'm kind of curious what it is people consider "motivational."

    What do you expect your friends to do, exactly?

    **RML*...for me motivation means to encourage a person's efforts to stay on track, and when they fall off to keep sending notes depending on your "developed relationship". If I've never gotten support or had a personal connection, I almost end up removing that Pal...cause, as was said before, there wasn't the interaction I gave or expected :ohwell: I was active for 600 plus days, and had a bad patch, and lost my standing...PLUS I gained some weight because I was off track. I made some great friends who sent ME notes of encouragement or just to say *hi*...That is MUTUAL motivation for sure!! Good Luck with your Pals...:drinker: Deb
  • LumpySpacePrincess1
    LumpySpacePrincess1 Posts: 388 Member
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    All I require is intelligence and a sense of humor. I motivate myself.
    Aye aye. I honestly came here because I suck at math and wanted the fancy diary.
    I like looking at a bunch of fit people in underwear, and other than that I just want a laugh.
  • debilang
    debilang Posts: 874 Member
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    Aye aye. I honestly came here because I suck at math and wanted the fancy diary.
    I like looking at a bunch of fit people in underwear, and other than that I just want a laugh.

    Lumpy...HUMOROUS...and you are still here...glad it is working:drinker:
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I must be uncool too. I've added a couple people, but when I actually tried to suggest maybe a sack of candy as a bedtime snack is counterproductive they got all butthurt and unfriended me, so I gave up.

    Was the person in question complaining about his or her progress or asking for advice?

    Unsolicited advice is never welcome. Even here.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I'm kind of curious what it is people consider "motivational."

    What do you expect your friends to do, exactly?

    **RML*...for me motivation means to encourage a person's efforts to stay on track, and when they fall off to keep sending notes depending on your "developed relationship". If I've never gotten support or had a personal connection, I almost end up removing that Pal...cause, as was said before, there wasn't the interaction I gave or expected :ohwell: I was active for 600 plus days, and had a bad patch, and lost my standing...PLUS I gained some weight because I was off track. I made some great friends who sent ME notes of encouragement or just to say *hi*...That is MUTUAL motivation for sure!! Good Luck with your Pals...:drinker: Deb
    But, see, that is not what it means to everyone. So people come here expecting something very specific, then get angry and delete a bunch of people who don't live up to their expectations.

    I try to be supportive as much as I can, but I'm not here for anyone but myself. I enjoy my FL. I have a few people I've met in person -- including a couple who live in town and we exercise together and things like that -- and others I've developed non-MFP relationships with, but I have a life outside of my computer and I can't spend all my time leaving everyone special messages.

    I have someone on my FL who used to go through every one of her friends' walls and comment on everything. She got super burned out by doing that. And even though it affected her real-world life, she actually felt terribly guilty when she decided to cut back on her time here. That shouldn't happen.

    Like I said, I like intelligence and a sense of humor. I only cut people who say very offensive things and that's only happened maybe twice.
  • LumpySpacePrincess1
    LumpySpacePrincess1 Posts: 388 Member
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    Aye aye. I honestly came here because I suck at math and wanted the fancy diary.
    I like looking at a bunch of fit people in underwear, and other than that I just want a laugh.

    Lumpy...HUMOROUS...and you are still here...glad it is working:drinker:
    *Fist bump* Wasting my life away in here in between diet and exercise is actually helping tremendously. It helps me stay on track just so I can come here, laugh and not be fat at the same time.
    It's all very productive stuff.
  • socioseguro
    socioseguro Posts: 1,679 Member
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    When I say I'm looking for motivated friends I mean that I am looking for people who actually exercise and log their food in their diaries. I don't really need to hear "good job" and what not on my posts. It's nice but I know when I lose I've done well, you know? Seeing others diaries helps motivate me to exercise when I'm feeling lazy and give me food inspirations.

    I learned about MFP successes here at the MFP boards.

    I checked the open diaries of the successful MFPers ( if they are kind enough to leave it open, thank you all). I have learned a lot and try to apply those lessons to my personal journey.

    I do not understand the quest for "friends" but to each its own. If that makes people happy, all the power to them.

    Good luck in your journey
  • KeepCalmNGetyaSweatOn
    KeepCalmNGetyaSweatOn Posts: 361 Member
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    I'm rather new the the message boards here but I've seen several threads asking people to friend them because they need inspirational or motivated friends or they need people to help them stay on track. I have added several people because I feel like I am a very motivated person or we have soem of the same interests and I was hoping that if I would be motivating these "new" friends, they'd do the same in return. That is not the case.

    I guess what I'm getting at is if you are asking for motivation and friends to cheer you on and tell you how great and awesome you are, expect your friends would like the same in return. Just saying....

    CAN I GET AN AMEN!!!!!
    I give people so many days to say something. Anything. Some people I make allowances for, but most people don't make the cut. I'm always supportive and encouraging. I try to also always be original and show that I truly care. If someone is going to take the time to respond to your posts and say something nice the least you can do is return the favor. You get what you give...
  • sullus
    sullus Posts: 2,839 Member
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    I would be a highly motivated friend.

    I would not be a highly motivational friend.

    People who request "motivated" friends may be asking the wrong question ...
  • mhoeff1
    mhoeff1 Posts: 163 Member
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    I have been thinking the same thing I have alot of friends but only a few i can count on good luck you can add me I will cheer ya on :)

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