How can i change the way i feel about myself...? :(

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  • kandalure
    kandalure Posts: 28 Member
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    I'm glad that everyone has been so nice and helpful for you. All I can do is let you know something that helps me out, which is exercise. Have you considered increasing/starting to exercise? It always makes me feel better (yay endorphins!) when I'm upset or feeling down. Also, making it through a tough workout makes me feel powerful and like I can do anything.

    Not sure if this will help you at all, but it is something that works for me. Good luck with everything!
  • yksdoris
    yksdoris Posts: 327 Member
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    I love that Dove ad!

    my advice for you would be: don't push it too much, take baby steps. Of course things can always be better, and in our minds we have this perfect image of absolute happiness for ourselves, but the fact of the matter is, most of the time when people get exactly what they've always dreamed about, it doesn't make them happy. There's always something that's not *quite* right. The trick is to categorize, same as with homework:

    1) things that are perfect
    2) things that are good enough
    3) things that aren't good enough

    For each of those, ask yourself: is it something I can change? If yes, excellent - all you need is a little bit of time and you can do it! But if you can't change it, then you have to leave it be.

    So, is there anything you love about yourself - more specifically about the way you look? For me, even at my darkest times it's been my hair. I like my hair. Even when I'm having a bad hair day, it still looks great. Better than most people, even if I say so myself. How about you? Your eyes maybe? What colour are they? No eye is exactly the same, and usually they have interesting patterns in the irises...
  • rieann84
    rieann84 Posts: 511 Member
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    I used to be like you. I guess that's what happens when you have school mates calling you ugly and making fun of you for years. I used to cry and ask "why me??" as it always seemed that people just always wanted to mess with me. I've been choked as people stood by and laughed. I've had a bottle chucked at my head in the hallway.

    I still have a lot of insecurities, but I think as you grow up, you get over it. For me, I just developed a "F*** it" attitude. You know? You get one life, this is it and this is what you look like. Now that i'm older I don't care as much that my nose isn't as cute as i'd like it to be, or that my skin is deathly pale. "It is what it is". I was tired of being miserable all the time. Also, I don't know if I grew into my features, or if I just matured..but just, over time it didn't matter anymore.

    It's good that you recognize the possible reasons for feeling the way you do. You think your mom is beautiful? Guess what, you are your mothers daughter and so are you


    FWIW - your avatar picture reminds me of Mila Kunis and she is gorgeous!
  • Nix143
    Nix143 Posts: 522 Member
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    Thank you. I needed to see both your very honest first post and then everyone else's supportive and helpful responses.

    I struggle with a lot of the same issues - I had a ridiculous reaction to something this weekend.

    Wishing you strength and peace in your journey XXX
  • shellma00
    shellma00 Posts: 1,684 Member
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    bob-harper-are-you-ready.jpg

    Read this book. The first section talks about how to get past looking at yourself in a negative way. Also, how the negative thinking can really affect your weight loss. He has you do a few exercises to help. Its worth a read if you want... Hope you can get past this and see yourself in a more positive way. :flowerforyou:
  • MFPRat
    MFPRat Posts: 201 Member
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    Someday you may look back on this as the day you changed your life.

    No one here will be able to accurately put a label on you and it's not very productive anyway. It's the last thing you should be worried about.

    I HIGHLY recommend that you seek some professional counseling. You're so young and you have so much time to be the person you can be. Please don't hesitate to take this next step. It can change your life.

    ^^^This
    You deserve peace and happiness.
  • brianafaye2
    brianafaye2 Posts: 166 Member
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    I wish I had the time to reply to everyone of you. I'm so happy I opened up, instead of holding onto all of this stress. I never really thought about things positively until now. I've read all of your posts, and I am so thankful to have all of your inputs. Thank you to everyone who has given me great advice. To everyone who has overcome their insecurities, I am so happy for you! You should be proud of how strong you are, and how far you've come! Also, to everyone who is fighting the battle i am; We can get through this! I hope that this post can help others, just like me. Again, thank you all so much for taking the time to help me. You are all amazing people <3.

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