Is it time to stop - what next?

TwelveSticks

I've lost 115 lbs and I am now 6 lbs off my goal weight. That being said, my goal weight (180 lbs) is actually still in the "overweight" BMI range for my height, albeit only by about half a pound. I have been happily trucking along, with the assumption that when I reach my goal weight, I will re-assess, given how I look and feel at that time, but I fully expect to have to lose a few more pounds.

Okay, so here's the thing... in the last 2-3 weeks, several of my friends have started telling me that I shouldn't lose any more weight, and nobody tells me "wow, you look great" anymore. Looking in the mirror, I can see what they mean - my face and neck are getting pretty scrawny. But the thing that they can't really see is the hefty amount of fat that I'm still carrying under my clothes - particularly out front, in my lower abdomen and chest. My waist measurement is still way above the "half your height", healthy size.

I figure that I am probably still about 10-14 lbs too heavy, but that all that excess weight (and possibly more) is hanging off the front of me, while much of the rest of me is starting to look gaunt.

I've read about how it isn't really possible to target specific areas of the body for fat loss through exercise, so I'm really not sure what to do now. Do I keep on losing until my unsightly fatty areas are gone, all the while looking more and more gaunt? Or do I stop losing and try to maintain where I am now? If I maintain, is there any chance that my body redistribute its fat deposits over time so there'll be less out front and more on my face etc?

Any advice from people who've been there would be appreciated...

cardinalsfootball

Yes, keep loosing it. Once you are really at your goal weight, your body will readjust loose skin, etc.

Then go back to maintenance and see if you can add some muscle to fill in some of the gaps.

After 90 days of being really at goal, if you still feel like you are gaunt, then I guess you'll have to decide whether moobs and flappy tummies are worth having a slightly fuller face.

I think at your point, focus on body fat %. Maybe 18% should be your goal?

schondell

Are you sure you look gaunt at 180 lbs?

Francl27

Lose the weight. It's for you, not for them. Why stop half way?

gigglesinthesun

One of the issues with western society being mostly overweight, is that we forget what 'normal' looks like. I started here, because my BMI moved into the overweight territory (again after a 9 year break) and when I explained that to my friends they all said that 'I couldn't trust the BMI'. The problem was that I am not fit and actually it was pretty accurate for me. I had been gaining weight and I could see my waistline expanding.

I would continue for the time being. If you are concerned you could check with your doctor. You could set your loss really low, so you might just lose a pound a month or something, but it is still going into the right direction. At that rate your friends might not even notice.

healthygreek

Especially for those who carry the weight in the stomach/chest area, it is so important to get down to your goal weight. That's the dangerous to your heart area. You and everyone else will become accustomed to your new look. You look pretty good to me.

FoxyLifter

Women tend to lose weight from top to middle/bottom. Face and boobs are usually the first to lose weight. I noticed that my arms had been getting a lot more defined even though my pants size remained the same (I've always been small chested so not much happened there thank God!).

Are you lifting? maybe building a little muscle while you lose fat would help... or at least retain the muscle you have now. Perhaps concentrating on your body fat % should be your new focus.

Either way, do the research for yourself and don't let others try to derail you. I've noticed a few friends and family members try to say that they're really worried about me (I weight 140-145, no where near underweight and I still have a nice booty ) and that I shouldn't lift so much because I'll get so bulky (which is funny because now that I'm lifting, I'm toning).

Best of luck! :flowerforyou:

walleymama

I was going to suggest that perhaps strength training with weights could help sculpt your body to something more like what you are looking for. It's hard to imagine someone looking "gaunt" at 180 lbs (unless you are like over 6 feet tall perhaps?).

I_Will_End_You

I would say lose the weight with a small deficit and strength training.

wonderiss

I have a similar dilemma. I am within my healthy BMI but I can still see rolls of fat (shudder) on my stomach. I have been told I am "too skinny" and that I "need to stop losing." I've also been asked if I am getting anorexic. I am not happy with what I still see, so I have decided to continue to try to lose. I decided that it's my body and my opinion is more important than what others think.

kirkor

Are you lifting weights?

PippiNe

Don't stop now, you're on a roll! I agree with other posters here, you will lose your fat in areas like your face and boobs first, areas you may not necessarily want to see it gone. But you don't get to choose where the fat is disappearing from. Your body is burning fat from all areas of your body simultaneously, it's just that the stubborn areas have lots more of it. The closer you get to your goal (and maybe a new goal after that) you will see your body start to even out and be more balanced.

If you really are not looking "well", could it partly be from lack of water or sleep? Those things can cause you to look pale, your skin to appear dull, dark circles under the eyes, etc. If your diet lacks hydration, try to give your body more. If you aren't getting enough sleep, try to rearrange your schedule to allow for more zzzzzzzzzzz's

thistimewillbedifferent

Congratulations on everything you have accomplished so far! That's amazing! Tagging because I want to be able to follow the responses -- I'm not there yet, but have been wondering how/when to know whether to stop. Best of luck for continued success!

chad_phillips1123

I've got a long ways to go to get to where you are (and will probably have to reassess a time or two before getting there), but agree with basically what everyone's said. The progress you've made is for yourself and you've come a long way. It'll take people that have known you awhile to get used to the new you; it'll also take your body some time to get used to it as well and sort itself out some. Personally, I know I'm going to have extensive loose skin (hoping it tightens some), because I'll never be able to get any sort of tighten surgery, but I'm doing this to feel better, live longer, and generally take up less volume in the world.

I'd suggest recompositioning; continuing to lose some more weight (specifically fat), but to focus now on building muscle. By adding muscle, you can tone some of those areas (target them) and be fitter and healthier.

Regardless of what you decide, you've done a terrific job getting to where you are! Hope to see you there someday!

oxlisaxo91

I’m in a similar boat, I literally only have a 1-2kgs to go, I’m super happy with my progress only have a bit more fat to lose around my hips & lower stomach and that’s it!
Over the last two weeks I have lost 1 and a half kg and guess where it came from… My chest and I don’t even mean my boobs, I mean my collarbone and just below there, in certain lights you can see the outline of my ribcage in that area.

Seriously? WTF Body.
You’ve got atleast 1-2kgs of fat sitting around the hips and you think the place I needed to lose fat was my collarbone & chest, were there was little to no fat there anyway!!!

Just gotta keep trucking on and hope that my hips & stomach will start shrinking soon!

SLLRunner

Twelve,

You pay no attention to them and continue to your goal. At that time you can reassess to see if you want to lose more or maintain.

Sometime people cannot get used to our new look of being healthier.

I love your before and after pictures too. You've come a long way, sir!

jenilla1

People don't tolerate change well. It's YOUR BODY and YOUR GOAL, not theirs. Plus, your body may be in that awkward transition stage. Get to goal, work on body composition and then give it time to adjust. :flowerforyou:

ETA: Just saw your photos. You look great! Either people just haven't gotten used to you looking different, they don't know what healthy looks like on you, or they are starting to feel threatened by your awesomeness, since you now look better than any of them. I would think any stranger would look at you and assume you were quite healthy. :drinker:

flumi_f

Don't let others get in your head ;-) Keep going.

When I look at your photo - I would concentrate on core and shoulders. If you get more muscles there, no one will say your scrawny anymore ;-)

You do alot of cardio. Maybe reduce that a bit and do some strength Training instead. I prefer to do my exercise outside, but since 1.5 yrs I go to the gym twice a week for strength training on maschines to strengthen core and back as I was having back problems. Maybe get a few personal training sessions in from a good trainer to see what you can do on your own.

Since the Aikido course two weeks ago I've been doing push ups, hollow rock sit ups (you tube) and squats all without weight every morning. The course was for riders, but after feeling those lower stomach muscles, I decided, they would help tone up my middle during weightloss too. I have alot of flab and skin there too.

I do 3 sets and am up to 3x10 man-pushups. When I started I could barely do 3 in a row. All of these exercises are especially for the core and will help tone up the middle section. I'm sure there are lots of other exercises you could do. I'm sure weightlifting is good, but I don't have access to any, so I'm doing these exercises.


The extra skin needs alot of time and patience to go away.

reddaddie

Congratulations!

You have lost a lot of weight in a short time. Some of what you are carrying may be loose skin if so it will take time to readjust it's self. I'd suggest switching to 1 lb per week and keeping up your exercise and watch your body shape up.

TwelveSticks

Thanks for the replies and great advice, everyone! You all say pretty much the same thing, which reinforces my own opinion too - keep losing until I'm happy with myself, and start doing some weight training to work on the areas I still have concerns about. I had intended all along to try P90X once I'd got to my goal, so that's what I'll do - there's plenty of core and upper body work in there to challenge and reshape me. I've been concentrating on lots of cardio up until now, and that's been working well for me, but I guess that the time is now right to change things around a little.

Thanks again everyone. Gotta love MFP...

LadyPakal

I lost half the weight I've now lost and people were telling me I didn't need to lose any more - they didn't believe me when I said I was only halfway and thought my goal too drastic . Now I'm here (BMI 23 so not too low by any stretch), they admit I was right to carry on. I still have some bits I need to work on but I'm taking an assessment break just now.

Only you can decide the right course. People get used to seeing you a certain way and people in general don't like things to change too much - however health is more important than anything at this point.

CherylP67

If the before and after in your pics is accurate and up to date, you look good, not gaunt. Is the stuff in your middle loose skin or actual fat?

TwelveSticks

If the before and after in your pics is accurate and up to date, you look good, not gaunt. Is the stuff in your middle loose skin or actual fat?

It's both, I think. I've been prepared all along to put up with some 'baggyness' - you can't lose 120+ lbs at my age and expect your skin to snap tight like it may have 20-odd years ago. To be honest, I've been pleasantly surprised at how well I've done in that respect. But It's certainly not just skin - there's a naughty collection of fat under there still as well!

As for the "gaunt" thing - I'm happy enough with the way I look right now, but I am starting to see lines in my face where I'd rather not have them. It was more the fact that, if I lose another 9-10lbs, which I expect I will, then I know that I'm only going to look even thinner in the face. But it doesn't bother me greatly...

Stage14

I second incorporating strength training. It will help preserve your muscle and esure that what you're brining off is fat. But I agree, you look great, so ignore the comments.

3foldchord

Are you lifting weights?

Ditto.
Double ditto.
However many ditto a the "lift weights" comment is at.

When I got close to by weight goal. I revised my goals to lifting weights and losing bodybfat ( as opposed to pounds on the scale)

PS congrats on the 115# loss

randomtai

Are you lifting weights?

Ditto.
Double ditto.
However many ditto a the "lift weights" comment is at.

When I got close to by weight goal. I revised my goals to lifting weights and losing bodybfat ( as opposed to pounds on the scale)

PS congrats on the 115# loss

Triple ditto... or quad... not sure

april1445

I've been in your situation, and here's my advice. You have to lift weights. There is no getting around it. Or buy p90x if that's more your thing, but you have to build your body back up. I've lost weight before, and looking back on pictures, I was very weird looking because I lost muscle tone as well as fat. Remember when Oprah lost weight on the liquid fast, compared to when she lost weight eating and working out? Totally different result. I think you look great in your pictures for what it's worth.

silken555

Twelve, I highly recommend the book New Rules of Lifting for Women. It's perfect for weight lifting beginners and has a very specific workout plan. It even shows you how to properly perform the movements. It's really well written too...:)

There are other books that people on MFP really like but I can't recall their names off the top of my head. Perhaps do a forum search for weight lifting books?

iechick

I've lost 115 lbs and I am now 6 lbs off my goal weight. That being said, my goal weight (180 lbs) is actually still in the "overweight" BMI range for my height, albeit only by about half a pound. I have been happily trucking along, with the assumption that when I reach my goal weight, I will re-assess, given how I look and feel at that time, but I fully expect to have to lose a few more pounds.

Okay, so here's the thing... in the last 2-3 weeks, several of my friends have started telling me that I shouldn't lose any more weight, and nobody tells me "wow, you look great" anymore. Looking in the mirror, I can see what they mean - my face and neck are getting pretty scrawny. But the thing that they can't really see is the hefty amount of fat that I'm still carrying under my clothes - particularly out front, in my lower abdomen and chest. My waist measurement is still way above the "half your height", healthy size.

I figure that I am probably still about 10-14 lbs too heavy, but that all that excess weight (and possibly more) is hanging off the front of me, while much of the rest of me is starting to look gaunt.

I've read about how it isn't really possible to target specific areas of the body for fat loss through exercise, so I'm really not sure what to do now. Do I keep on losing until my unsightly fatty areas are gone, all the while looking more and more gaunt? Or do I stop losing and try to maintain where I am now? If I maintain, is there any chance that my body redistribute its fat deposits over time so there'll be less out front and more on my face etc?

Any advice from people who've been there would be appreciated...

I had to lose 15lbs more then my original goal weight, before my 'oomph' on my bottom half (pear shaped here) finally went away. I lost top to bottom and while my face/neck/top half really slimmed down, I had to keep going to get the rest of me to match up. I also got the comments, but first of all like you said-people aren't seeing the whole picture because they're not seeing what's under your clothes. And secondly, people are used to seeing you/us overweight and it's a bit of a shock to them, to see us actually in a healthy range now. Their perceptions are off but they will get used to the new look after a while.

3foldchord

Twelve, I highly recommend the book New Rules of Lifting for Women.

To this and the many other posts about where women lose weight, 180# not being nearly light enough to look gaunt, and women lifting ideas....TwelveSticks is a guy.

cingle87

If you are at a happy weight then its time to look are your body composition, what this basically means adding muscle to your frame and bringing your BF% down. You can stay at the same way by adding LBM i.e muscle to your body and bring your overall body fat % down, this can done mainly by lifting and lifting heavy.

You are suffering whats known on here as "skinny fat", being at a "normal" weight but still have fatty areas. What happens when you diet, your body will use fat stores as well as lbm as fuel to make up for the deficit, this is unadvoidable, the only way to avoid excessive loss of lbm is by lifting during your diet, this will tell your body to keep hold of as much lbm as it can.

So if you are happy with your weight, don't go lower just add some muscle to your frame and decrease your bf%