Feeling pretty helpless

rieann84

Don't be afraid to skirt around the issue for fear of stirring up his feelings. Sounds like he might need you to be his rock right now. Be up front. Talk about it your finances. Discuss what you can tighten up to get by in the meanwhile until he finds something else. You will be okay. Ignoring it will only make those feelings of uneasiness, sadness, etc linger. You gotta nip it in the bud.

There are always part time jobs out there. They probably suck, and they probably don't pay much..but if its all you can get for now, I say go for it.

If what you're saying is true, and they let him go just for inquiring about more working hours, then it sounds like a place he probably wouldn't want to work at anyway.. Talk about over reacting.

nomeejerome

There is not enough information provided by the OP to make such strong claims about this guy. Unless I missed it, nobody knows if this is situational depression, major depression or another diagnosis where depression is one of the symptoms. We also do not know if the guy is even diagnosed with anything or it is just a down in the dumps kind of feeling. What we do know is the major changes happening in their lives, such as moving, getting married, loss and gain of jobs.

Mental health is a serious thing that many do not understand and those that experience situational (temporary due to major life events) depression have the expectations that others will heal in a similar timeframe. That is far from the truth. People suffering in the grips of a mental health diagnosis (especially if it is severe and chronic) are going through something that can be hard to understand to outsiders. Instead of continuing the stigma of mental health, learn more about it.

OP: I hope that you are able to speak to your fiancée and address your concerns. Hopefully, you will be able to find some services in your area that can help be a buffer during this time.

jofjltncb6

When did overcoming true clinical depression become a matter of willpower/manning up?

MFP, you never cease to amaze me.


OP, I hope you find a solution to your problem. (If you find it in this thread, however, I'll be astounded.)

Sorry! Didnt see the update that it was clinical depression. My suggestion probably sounds stupid now.

Not your fault. Admittedly, I included a diagnosis in my response that we didn't actually know for certain. That said, we also didn't know for certain that it *wasn't* that either. (All of this does a great job to illustrate how the facts are essential for meaningful responses.)

So, OP, in bifurcating the replies, 1) if it isn't actual depression but is just moping, follow the advice of those suggesting he "man up", whatever that thing was you were supposed to do with his balls, or the other "snap out of it"-type responses, and 2) if it's depression, then seek professional help from whatever resources are available to him.