The Real Paelo Diet

Lichent

Buddy and I have been considering a paleo diet much to the dismay of our trainer and doctor.

In all likkihood the diet of the big apes , would be a good starting point.

Our evolutionary forefathers would have foraged 70 percent of the time in search of foodstuff.much like the gorillas, chimps and bonabos.

This tells me in order to follow a true paleo diet my Buddy and I are going to have give up our day jobs.

To get a better picture of this diet , see BBC the truth about Food put some humans in a zoo and fed them a diet consistent with what the other primates were eating. The upside of this was their blood sugars and cholestral levels came out ever so good.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mue6z0igQIU

Talk about back to the future!

The new shopping list:

1.Small game — really small game — like rats, mice and squirrels. {whole foods is going to have to expand their meat dept}

2. plants, pre-selective breeding. Sour and bitter tastes existed in many plant foods before human interference. Although paleolithic man probably would avoid downright foul-tasting (and likely poisonous) food, the plants that they ate were hardly nice, friendly spinach or carrots. Many modern vegetables are more pleasant mutations and hybridizations of less pleasant or even poisonous plants such as the genuses solanum (tomatoes, potatoes, peppers) and prunus (almonds, peaches, apricots, plums, cherries).

Safe varieties were likely discovered by just eating them and hoping it didn't kill anybody. {guinea pigs needed for testing}

3. another item for the grocery basket paleolithic people are known to have eaten woody stems, stripped bark, and pith: things suspiciously absent from the modern paleo diet that probably contributed to the extreme wear and tear on their teeth observed in fossil individuals. {we are going to need a dental plan}



4. Organ meat — a critical part of paleolithic man's diet. Does the average paleo dieter eat brains, tongues, stomach, eyes, liver, or kidneys? All of these brought important nutrition to our "healthy" ancestors that doesn't exist in white meat and cuts of grazing beef.


5. Insects, especially grubs and large beetles, including roaches.


6. Lizards, newts, frogs, turtles and anything else that had meat on its bones {sadly lacking in most grocery stores}

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7. Grains and other starches such as sorghum, wild corn (in both North and South American), potatoes (South America), and a large variety of seeds. Evidence for consumption of legumes such as wild lentils has also been found, along with stone tools associated with processing them. Note we need more stonewear in our kitchen drawers.

Fruits and nuts.


Paleolithic man had eating habits and requirements that were dramatically different. Modern man exists with lots leisure time, to much time in the office , on the computer, in front of the tv and has central heating to keep himself warm., as well as doctors, surgeons, hospitals, antibotics, and winter wear Modern man has by far to many calorie options and way to many varies of foodstiff to choose from and sugar. Paleo man got his sweets thru fruit and honey. {if he was lucky}

Weight loss is best acheived on this diet by Buddy and me copying the Paleo man's activity.

That is hours of treking and pursuing our wild game, and not withguns, thats cheating, but with real home made spears with hand carved flint points and homemade bows and arrows,{a real evolutionary jump , maybe a form of cheating as this item appears to have come only in the last 40.000 years}.
as well as energy expended on the gathering up wood for heat. Of coarse the ogathering of roots ,tubers , and nuts for the winter.{ paleo gardening}

Wetcoaster

Glad I have already had a couple beers after reading that.

Mcgrawhaha

this made my day

SLLRunner

Is this humor? If not, it comes across that way.

Mokey41

Picturing buddy sneaking through the dumpsters hunting rats while the mrs crawls around looking for roaches. And what is a bonabos???

ZombieEarhart

Thank god, you are a troll after all. I was pretty legit worried.

Mr_Knight

I don't know if it's intentional humour or not, but the author has pretty much nailed down what a Paleo diet actually looks like. If you want a visual representation, go watch "Quest for Fire" on Netflix or catch a few episodes of "Naked & Afraid".

Those ancestors of ours had it *hard*, and the food (what little there was of it) absolutely sucked. The notion they were running around eating butchered slices of "pasture fed" cows is a delusion.

Alluminati

Picturing buddy sneaking through the dumpsters hunting rats while the mrs crawls around looking for roaches. And what is a bonabos???

Bonabos

RhonndaJ

Hmmm.... if you really want roaches I can arrange a steady supply, and not those tiny little things either. The kittens are quite certain they are the best toys on the planet and are determined to bring them inside.

Rurouni_Kou

Appropriate video to go with this post: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BMOjVYgYaG8 (Debunking Paleo TEDx talk.)

bethannien

And this is why I lol every time someone tells me the "paleo" diet is the way man was meant to eat. Thanks for the laugh :bigsmile:

Lichent

Edible Insects{we can special order these}
Cockroaches Ideally fed on a diet of fresh fruits and vegetables. They can be eaten toasted, fried, sauteed, or boiled. Madagascar Hissing Cockroaches have a taste and texture like greasy chicken.

Bamboo worm: Often eaten fried in Thailand, they are the larvae of the Grass Moth

Cicadas: just after they molt they have juicy juicy bodies

Dung Beatles tasty when fried

Earth Worm High in Protein

Louse: "I have seen Cheyenes and Utes eat them off each other by the fistful"

http://edibug.wordpress.com/list-of-edible-insects/

QuietBloom

The pictures from that website will haunt me in my dreams tonight. :frown:

Lichent

After a few hours of stumbling around in the damp and cold in pursuit of living protein Buddy and I decided to give up our pursuit of the Paleo Diet, given the that there were so many Paleo diets back in the good old days and most Paelos ate lots and lots of plants
we realized we are modern humans , that our store bought meat is farm raised these meats which are a far cry from the parastie infested wild animals of the good old days and along with that would be our farm raised plant products that have been genetically altered the last few thousand years by selective breedin and we are not yet ready to engage in bug eating our Paelo ancestors did a lot of as well as the chimps and bonabos and the gorillas our gentic coursins.

What was even worse was those paelo cultures studied in the Amazon are not that healthy and worse yet the Paleos carried all sorts of parasties , life expectancy was 15 to 20 years of age. Back to the future we don't want to go.


Nope no siree , back to our urban garden we go, if we become protein deficient I am sure we can dig up a few earthworms for fryin.
http://nutritionfacts.org/2013/02/21/the-real-paleo-diet/