Any advice for my hubby a Big Guy?

stumblinthrulife

First - baby steps. For God's sake don't let him think he has to eat nothing but lettuce leafs and carrots to lose weight. And he needs realistic goals. He will not be Brad Pitt in a month. Losing at about a pound a week is manageable, and not too taxing. If he throws exercise into the mix, he'll be amazed how much he can eat while still losing weight.

I lost 60 pounds eating whatever the heck I wanted to - I just learned portion control.

To start with, he needs to learn to love the scale - the kitchen scale. Everything dry must be weighed, everything liquid either weighed or measured in a measuring cup. Then log it all. Everything. No matter what. Doesn't matter if he's proud of his food diary or not - it's for him only, and cheating is only cheating himself.

Once he knows how to measure, he'll know what he's consuming. If it's hugely over maintenance levels, he may want to reduce slowly over time. Once he gets his calories consistently under maintenance, he'll start losing weight. If he's not losing weight, he's not under maintenance, period.

Once he's got the hang of that, he'll want to learn about macro-nutrients. Macronutrients are protein, fat and carbohydrates, and they are all sources of calories. By upping his protein and fat he'll feel less hungry and lose more fat v. muscle while he's dieting. Most people use the rules of thumb of - 1g of protein per pound of lean body mass, 0.35g of fat per pound of total body mass.

Now you can make sure he's getting enough vegetables, fruit, etc... That'll check the micronutrients box.

If at this point you want to go the 'lifestyle diet' route, of veganism, eating clean, paleo, etc... then have at it. But know that it's not necessary for weight loss.

Exercise is not necessary for weight loss, but has massive other benefits. Personally I recommend at least regular walking, and/or taking up a sport like tennis, basketball, etc that keeps him moving. Running not required unless he wants to. Lifting heavy weights will allow him to further improve the ratio of fat/muscle that he loses while dieting, and he will look much better at any given goal weight. I suggest StrongLifts, but that's just because that's what I do. There are loads of good beginner barbell programs out there.

I think that about covers it.

I forgot something, dangit. Constantly compare actual with predicted results, and correlate with behavior. This will help him find if he's doing something wrong, and fix it.

Example - over the summer my weight loss stalled. Because I track consistently, and compare actual/predicted results, I could spot this easily. I then compared to my food and exercise diary and found that it coincided with swim season. Conclusion - I was overlogging calorie burns from swimming, resulting in me eating too much. As soon as I reined in the cal burns on swimming, my loss started again.

Nikoruo

I was 340 lbs.... and female... but the advice i'd give is just take it easy at first. Switch out the bad with the good over time. make kind of time periods in the day in which you eat said amount of foods. And just really test the grounds. Don't force yourself to do it all at once, thats why a lot of people fail. Just make sure to push yourself a little bit each day to do better, to be healthier. Hold your girl and know its for you both

MyChocolateDiet

if he's on MFP he will find the answers that suit his particular personality and set of challenges on his own. you just do you. it's enough to keep you busy. just be patient, smile, and support whatever his choices may be, even if they differ from yours and his progress does as well. good luck to both of you. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

Railr0aderTony

if he's on MFP he will find the answers that suit his particular personality and set of challenges on his own. you just do you. it's enough to keep you busy. just be patient, smile, and support whatever his choices may be, even if they differ from yours and his progress does as well. good luck to both of you. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

I was wrong there is a much nicer way to say it. This is great advice.

MyChocolateDiet

Im a big guy. Not that big....but still a big guy. Have your husband join up and friend me. Id be glad to help him out.

me too...giggity.

JUDDDing

First - baby steps. For God's sake don't let him think he has to eat nothing but lettuce leafs and carrots to lose weight. And he needs realistic goals. He will not be Brad Pitt in a month. Losing at about a pound a week is manageable, and not too taxing. If he throws exercise into the mix, he'll be amazed how much he can eat while still losing weight.

I lost 60 pounds eating whatever the heck I wanted to - I just learned portion control.

To start with, he needs to learn to love the scale - the kitchen scale. Everything dry must be weighed, everything liquid either weighed or measured in a measuring cup. Then log it all. Everything. No matter what. Doesn't matter if he's proud of his food diary or not - it's for him only, and cheating is only cheating himself.

Once he knows how to measure, he'll know what he's consuming. If it's hugely over maintenance levels, he may want to reduce slowly over time. Once he gets his calories consistently under maintenance, he'll start losing weight. If he's not losing weight, he's not under maintenance, period.

Once he's got the hang of that, he'll want to learn about macro-nutrients. Macronutrients are protein, fat and carbohydrates, and they are all sources of calories. By upping his protein and fat he'll feel less hungry and lose more fat v. muscle while he's dieting. Most people use the rules of thumb of - 1g of protein per pound of lean body mass, 0.35g of fat per pound of total body mass.

Now you can make sure he's getting enough vegetables, fruit, etc... That'll check the micronutrients box.

If at this point you want to go the 'lifestyle diet' route, of veganism, eating clean, paleo, etc... then have at it. But know that it's not necessary for weight loss.

Exercise is not necessary for weight loss, but has massive other benefits. Personally I recommend at least regular walking, and/or taking up a sport like tennis, basketball, etc that keeps him moving. Running not required unless he wants to. Lifting heavy weights will allow him to further improve the ratio of fat/muscle that he loses while dieting, and he will look much better at any given goal weight. I suggest StrongLifts, but that's just because that's what I do. There are loads of good beginner barbell programs out there.

I think that about covers it.

I forgot something, dangit. Constantly compare actual with predicted results, and correlate with behavior. This will help him find if he's doing something wrong, and fix it.

Example - over the summer my weight loss stalled. Because I track consistently, and compare actual/predicted results, I could spot this easily. I then compared to my food and exercise diary and found that it coincided with swim season. Conclusion - I was overlogging calorie burns from swimming, resulting in me eating too much. As soon as I reined in the cal burns on swimming, my loss started again.
[/quote

I was going to reply, but... I agree completely.

Nice post.

jeffd247

Reward him...


*wink wink, nudge nudge*

wolverine66

Personally, I honestly didn't want my wife to cheer me on. I didn't want her to think i needed it micromanaged. She has enough on her plate, and while an acknowledgement from time to time is nice, I wanted to change my lifestyle and eating habits in a way that she didn't have to change hers, or make concessions for me. I don't think she even knows how i am doing it, because I am super quiet about it. but that is my personal preference. i didn't want to make a production out of it.

so, that's just one perspective.

wolverine66

Reward him...


*wink wink, nudge nudge*

this works too

Alisontheice

Sounds like my husband. He still wont' really exercise but he is finally watching what he eats since going to the doctor and having her tell him he needs to lose weight to help his blood pressure among other things. I think the fact I have lost about 20 lb recently helps but the doctor seems to be what was his turning point.

YogaJim108

My advice for him would be to not try to change everything at once. Have him try to incorporate something new each week instead of trying to deprive him of something. If he is not drinking any water, have him start by drinking a glass of water each day instead of trying for eight glasses right away. If he doesn't exercise, have him do something for 5 minutes to start and then build up. I look at weight loss as a journey not a destination. Good luck to him and you.

zeebruhgirl

My hubby is 6'4" and 340's, he's eating 2700 to lose. IIFYM.com will give you a TDEE calculator and a lot of great information!

maryann9wood

My husband started when I did. He's a big guy and he's lost 40 pounds. He does much better when he logs his own food. He will ask me to do it, but it's not effective. He goes to the gym and does treadmill and bike. He likes sugar-free jello in the evening instead of ice cream. Portion control is the most important thing. We don't weigh and measure everything like some people here do, but we got out the measuring cups and spoons and learned what those sizes look like. One tablespoon of butter is NOT as much as will stay on top of mashed potatoes!

SmileCozYouCan

i have nothing to contribute here. i wish him luck tho. i JUST LOVE YOUR PROFILE PICTURE!!!!

This!!

zilfig64

A lot of great advice so far! I am 6'5 - was 349, took me about a year to lose 20 pounds, then joined MFP and lost 52lbs in 6 months (and 9" around my stomach).
Three pieces of advice:
1 - LOG - it is amazing the information he can get from that - totally eye opening. I thought I was eating well, and reasonable calories - was eating much more than I thought!!
2 - DON"T make major changes in diet right away. Make small ones and build up - that way your mind will go along with your body, and it wont be quite so hard. Amazing once you start switching out that peanut butter sandwich at 3pm for an apple how much difference those little steps can make - especially in a big guy. Keep at the small changes - they will all add up! Don't deprive yourself of what you like - I still have a beer or wine almost every day - but 1, occasionally 2, but not 4-5-6.
3 - EXERCISE - Can be hard at first - I could only do 5 pushups, 15 sit-ups, and 15min on the eliptical was killer. But keep at it - do what you can and add alittle - I added 1 pushup and 2 sit-ups every week. Then as I got stronger added more, but not so much it hurt.

Another thing - tell him don't get discouraged if his weight does not drop every week (I weigh weekly - too much variation daily). I have had weeks with no loss, and weeks with 6 lbs lost - your body adjusts all the time -just keep at it.

As an added bonus - tell him losing wieght and inches around his stomach/waist makes other things bigger!

Good luck to him (and you). Lots of great people here for support.

trogalicious

So here. I put this together a while back. It seems to have helped some folks. It worked for me and tons of others.

1. don't trust the initial setup that MFP provides. If you put in the wrong/inaccurate information, it'll tell you to eat an amount that may not be applicable.
2. Make sure you eat enough.
3. Figure out what works for you and is sustainable/healthy/long term.
4. avoid fads. don't buy in to any "Hey, try the twinkie and vodka diet"
5. Don't cut out anything now that you don't plan on literally giving up forever.
6. GET A FOOD SCALE. Weigh everything. No, seriously.
7. Get an HRM with a chest strap. You'll at least have a better idea of what you're burning. It'll be more accurate than the generic info in the exercise database.. and even more than the cardio machines. This is great for steady state cardio (run/walk/etc)
8. Don't go balls out. You'll burn out. I see 300 lb people show up here, instantly start working out and cutting their intake SEVERELY... trying to cut out all of their carbs at once.. whatever. Take it slow. Figure out how much you need to eat FIRST in order to lose.. then incorporate exercise.
9. Don't cardio yourself to death.
10. Take the information on the forums with a grain of salt. A lot of people that have been here for a while.. and have been successful, may seem jaded. They give out GREAT advice day after day, only to be met with people that refuse to listen.
11. Eat real food. Not diet food. Not "low fat, sugar free, now without X." It's easier to get/find/count.
12. don't set time restrictions.
13. measure yourself weekly. Don't just weigh. Measure and take pictures.
14 BE PATIENT.
15. Avoid forum topics that have "1200" in the title. It's just full of butthurt. Lots of it.
16. This isn't a game, it's about changing your lifestyle. Do that.

pretty much that.

AquabearGO

bump

michelegurr

Thanks!LOL I work in a vet clinic so the profile pic was ever so perfect for me!

soltris

This advice is all spot on, but most importantly: baby steps to start with. I'd say start with the calorie counter and don't try to make huge changes to diet immediately, just get him counting calories and logging everything (everything!) and he should be able to work out pretty quickly how much of whatever he can eat. Changing everything at once is very difficult and, while possible, is much more likely to cause a breakdown and regression later.

I'm 339 now, was 391 at my worst and started MFP at 366. The app said I could eat 2550 calories daily... so I did! You can see my diary, I eat pretty atrociously and will admit to it. It works as advertised though and if he sticks to the amount of calories given he will see a gradual loss over time.

My other bit of advice is, if possible, not to fixate on the number on the scale at all. I weigh every day and log it but it's not for everybody; upward spikes have been as big as ten (!) pounds in the past. As long as the line trends downward over time it's going well, and don't sweat the day-to-day fluctuation. If it's too hard to separate that though, take it back to once every week or two.

michelegurr

Dixieneedles that is great! That is how I came into this, I had that problem of apparently being in starvation mode! I did the same thing, gained more the less I ate...I have spent the last 30 years or so trying so hard to stay BELOW a target calorie count that trying to get as close to it as possible makes all the difference! As a matter of fact if I don't slow down with how fast it's coming off (8 lbs my first 6 days! ) I'm gonna up the caloric requirement manually so I don't get sick. As a result of my years of misguided diet training, I just can't fathom eating that many calories and losing weight! Appreciate everyone's comments and tips for success!