I am now in maintenance and have been for several weeks - it absolutely terrifies me, with good grounds. I have been here before about 4 or 5 times. I lose weight brilliantly, it becomes my life's work, I become close on obsessed with it, I become almost a scientific genius on everything from glycogen to the latest low calorie foods - recently I have been digesting videos on Youtube like there is no tomorrow on the obesity epidemic and every weight loss programme that is out there.
Something happens to me during maintenance - I take my eye off the ball (I quit logging, stop working out) and BOOM! there I am 50 or 60lbs heavier again. I cannot "relax" and no matter how many times I think I can "eat intuitively" or "know what a proper portion looks like" I can't - I know if I want to remain slim I will need to log until the day I die or someone else makes my food choices for me. At the moment adding extra calories to maintain is really hard, I am trying but I panic about it - logic escapes my mind and this idea that this body I have will slip through my fingers again and I will be obese and hating my body and only able to wear nasty clothes rather than all the lovely ones I have now.
Has anyone found a way to get this fear, obsession or whatever you want to call it out of my head? I want to enjoy my new body and be able to enjoy things like going out without the panic of eating a slice of birthday cake and not logging it right taking over.