Is accepting fatness a good thing?

cwrldpc

I don't want anyone to think I am being mean. This is an honest question. I understand as a population we are getting fatter all the time. I know I am guilty of it, that's why I am here trying to lose weight. But it seems like there is this big push to just accept fatness and leave it at that. My problem with that is that we know it isn't healthy. We idolize super skinny people, but commercials promote crappy food and drinks. I accept that I am fat now, and I don't believe in shaming people for their weight, but I also know that I would be much healthier if I lost some of the excess.

Is it really a good thing to just accept that people are getting heavier?

GnosisGnosis

It's really a good thing to love yourself, and other people, no matter what. We are all constant works' in progress. You should never judge somebody at face value because you have no idea what they've been through or are currently going through.

sjanejack

Not exactly, but accepting eating disorders wouldn't be a good thing either. Its one extreme or another, or so it seems.

peachcats

no

I will never accept "healthy at any size"
I will never accept that "some people are predisposed to be obese"
I will never accept "thin privilege".

cwrldpc

I worry that my son (who is starting to get a bit pudgy) will see this as normal and never be motivated to be more active. If all his friends are heavy than the kid who is in shape is the odd man out. What kind of legacy are we leaving our kids? I would never judge people for being fat (hell, I am pretty hefty right now) but it just seems there is the push to accept that we are fat. Don't push for people to get healthy because that might make them feel bad.

javajinny

It seems to me like the acceptence move that's out there is about loving yourself no matter what. Fat, skinny, dull, smart, polite, mean....we all need that message. We all have things we'd like the change about ourselves but we still have to love ourselves. Real change only starts when you love yourself enough. The message I've taken from the acceptence media out there isn't that it's "ok" or "healthy" to be fat, it's that you should still love yourself because no one's perfect and to stop comparing because that skinny lady next you is going through something, too, and you might would rather be fat than deal with what she's going through.

teamAmelia

If you are healthy, then I wouldn't say that it's necessarily a good thing. It's just not a bad thing.

I worry that my son (who is starting to get a bit pudgy) will see this as normal and never be motivated to be more active. If all his friends are heavy than the kid who is in shape is the odd man out.

I'm confused. Are you saying that they give thinner ppl a hard time or are you just saying that if everyone else is fat and you're the only one skinny, you will naturally be the odd man out simply bc you're the only one who's skinny? If it's the latter, I don't think that you have a reason for concern. What kind of person gets fat just bc everyone else is fat? That person would have much deeper issues.

rickyd88

We shouldn't accept fat as healthy, but we should accept that we are all different. Some of us want to lose weight whilst others are content being bigger and it doesn't bother them. Some of us are tall and disguise the fact they are overweight.

We shouldn't be encouraging weight loss or gain. We should be encouraging a healthy lifestyle even when it does mean that a difference to our weight is needed.

keeptehpeace

Shaming people for being fat just makes them more fat, it's been proven (http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2013/07/26/205766456/hating-on-fat-people-just-makes-them-fatter)
and I think acceptance of yourself is important for a healthy balanced mind; however if it is negatively affecting your health or your ability to function as a human being I don't personally think so. It gets to a point with some people where I think they just stop caring, and I find that sad.

Also I believe that some people are naturally heavier than others - there is a healthy weight range for each height/gender/age (which I'm personally in), and within that most people are fine.

arrexu

I also have mixed feelings about this movement of "fat acceptance" that I see on the internet these days. I think it's great that fat women are running their own "fatshion" blogs and showing that fat people can be fashionable and ANYONE can look good and fashionable regardless of body size and shape type if they find the right kind of clothes. But at the same time, I'm not sure about the prevalence of health issues in that community and population, as most posts I've seen focus primarily on outfits and how they sourced the clothes. I don't really see anyone talking about their health but I do see a lot of posts where it's like "eat what you want and DGAF!" I think that kind of mindset is potentially dangerous, because for some people, if they did that, they'd be up to 500+ pounds (I know I would fall in that group).

Now, I haven't researched this too deeply myself, but I read somewhere that it's possible that up to 25% of people can carry excess fat without serious health issues, and it may actually be better for them to do so. Again, this is something I'd need to verify with several more sources. I am definitely against body-shaming of ANY kind and that people should make an effort to go beyond whatever snap judgements they make when they first see a person based on their body size and shape type.

However, it's not really any of my business what people choose to do. I'm just going to focus on what I'm doing and why I'm doing it. I do think that there should be more education in the schools about nutrition and exercise, and how to maintain your health provided the focus is just on that and not "you will DIE if you're 30 lbs overweight ya fatass!!" which is kind of the vibe I got from my health class when I was in high school. -_-; I also wish that my school's health classes focused more on the different body types and how people can be different shapes and still healthy and how the media portrayal of "fit and healthy" is pretty skewed.

GingerLolita

This whole "fat pride" movement or whatever you want to call is just as harmful as our idealization of underweight bodies.

bluefox9er

I don't want anyone to think I am being mean. This is an honest question. I understand as a population we are getting fatter all the time. I know I am guilty of it, that's why I am here trying to lose weight. But it seems like there is this big push to just accept fatness and leave it at that. My problem with that is that we know it isn't healthy. We idolize super skinny people, but commercials promote crappy food and drinks. I accept that I am fat now, and I don't believe in shaming people for their weight, but I also know that I would be much healthier if I lost some of the excess.

Is it really a good thing to just accept that people are getting heavier?

if being ' fat' was still considered unhealthy AND , say hypothetically you were one of a 90% of a population that was ' fat', would you still accept being 'fat' just because most people are?

I think it starts from accepting who you are, and then accepting or rejecting the choice to do what is socially unremarkable or do what is right for you as an individual.

cactusyogi

Loving your body and being comfortable in your own skin is the biggest thing. ♥

NickHall1988

I think weight should be entirely a non-issue. I don't think people should be encouraged to gain or loose weight. I think if people are encouraged to eat properly and be active regularly then weight wouldn't be something that had to be worried about.

Obesity isn't the problem, it's a symptom. Fix the root cause.

bethannien

It's not up to me to approve of anyone's lifestyle or choices. Being overweight or obese is certainly not optimal for health reasons, obviously. But it isn't my place to judge. I do me and treat the people around me with respect. :flowerforyou:

ETA: When it comes to caring for my children, my focus will always be on being active and having a healthy relationship with food, never size.

donthesitate

If you love yourself and your body you should want whats best for it by being healthy

awise19

People need to love themselves no matter what size, that is true. To be truly motivated I have seen that you have to be able to look at yourself in a healthy way before you can strive to be better. But no, as a whole we should NEVER be okay with people being unhealthy and obese, because it is dangerous. It is unhealthy, but I don't think that as many people are just okay with it as you think. Now there is a huge difference also between shaming people for being obese, which doesn't help them at all and motivating them and helping them see the benefit of eating healthy and portion control and working out. Sometimes A LOT of people forget this. We are a population of bashing and judgement instead of promoting what you love and not bashing what you hate. This causes a lot of turn off to the fitness world and the eating healthy crowd.

When it comes to your Son, you need to show him the benefits of being healthy and active and show him how to promote that in a fun healthy way so that his friends maybe will follow his lead. You don't want to worry about him following his friends when he could follow his strong and healthy mother and I don't think he will ever get made fun of for being active or healthy. In school it was very much the other way around, even by other obese kids they would make fun of other obese kids. Actually you just need to help your child realize that NO MATTER WHAT someone is going to make fun of something. Those people just are there, you can be the most perfect person, the nicest person ever and someone is going to be a bully. Sadly that is what we have to prepare our children for and just teach them the right things to do in life no matter the judgement that happens. Just like teaching them not to do drugs even if it is the "cool thing to do"....


So yeah. Just my thoughts.

MsKeelah919

I think that self acceptance is important. W

msf74

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

Is accepting people for the content of their character rather than their physical appearance a good thing?

Well, yeah.

ldrosophila

yes

TMLPatrick

Not discriminating against obese people should be second nature. That being said, rather than shaming obese people into exercising, we should praise people who are willing to keep themselves in shape and eat well.

Contrarian

I don't judge others for being overweight, but it isn't something I accept for myself. I like being healthy and strong.

elkahallick

With everything said above I want you to look at it this way... If fat people do think its appropriate for anyone to talk about their weight and not to be judged then I would hope they could keep their judgments about my lifestyle today... Thirst week I had an over weight nurse say "just how long do actually think you can go loggin everything to eat?", then I had the clerck at the grocery store say "you never buy anything fun" and then today a out of shape gas station attendant said "you've lost too much weight"... So lets all be accepting of others, but I wish they'd return the favor... Here's my saying "don't comment on my eating, weight or lifestyle and I won't on yours"

SusanMcAvoy

bump

Sovictorrious

I think people need to love who they are.

I don't judge people because I do not know their story.

Someone may see me on a random Tuesday and assume that all I do is sit on my *kitten* and eat.

They see me as overweight and unhealthy. They do not know my story or what I do on a daily basis.

Basically, stop worrying abut the next person. Take care of your body and do what you can to make it stronger and healthier.

If we all did this then maybe the weight issue would die down.

Meanwhile right now I am the healthiest i have ever been in my life, but to a stranger I am just obese.

I cannot change what anyone think and I don't want to walk around wearing a sign with my diet and exercise routine outlined.

So while I wait for my body to change, I love the fucck out of this body I have right now.

And if anyone hates me for it....I don't CARE!

PunkyRachel

I was a happy fat person, I accepted my fatness and I didn't care that I was unhealthy. I'd still be over 200 lbs if my dad didn't have his heart attack. I had to see him in the hospital bed, connected up to who knows what, and seeing him in pain and he was just so weak. I remember not knowing if he would survive having quadruple bypass surgery. After he survived everything, I took a hard look at myself. This made me want to get healthy, this scare and fear of being in the hospital myself is my motivation. My only goal is to be healthy. I don't care what size I wear as long as its a healthy size and weight I have achieved.

marketdimlylit

N.o.

fannyfrost

I didn't read the replies, but while it is not a good thing to accept being heavy, it is also not a good thing to think Skinny means healthy.

I am considered Obese based on my BMI. My husband weighs what he should. I exercise 4 to 6 times a week and eat lots of veggies. He never exercises, eats like no veggies and drinks at least once a week. My cholesterol and BP is perfect, sugars, triglycerides all good. His Cholesterol is high, triglycerides are high too. BP is fine. We both went for Life Insurance, his was on target with the estimate for his age, my price went down because I am so healthy He likes to pretend its his family history, but I know its his cholesterol and the meds.

So being thin doesn't mean as much overall.

littleburgy

People should always be treated with respect no matter what size they are.

That said, no, I am not comfortable with the idea of "fat acceptance" in the sense I don't think poor health is something that should be accepted. Obesity not only affects a person's own quality of life, but it affects the people around them, including their loved ones, and society in general, like the costs of health care as well.

Of course the answer isn't just shaming people about their weight. I think so many factors can come into play about why people struggle with this, like economics, available support systems, education, work, stress, emotional wellbeing.

People that are fat or obese just want to be treated and loved like human beings, but I am doubtful that most are really comfortable with being so heavy when confronted with it as a serious health issue.

Mongognom

Not discriminating against obese people should be second nature. That being said, rather than shaming obese people into exercising, we should praise people who are willing to keep themselves in shape and eat well.

We should give people the option to be healthy. By making sure that children learn nutrition at school, by making sure that there are stores in all neighborhoods that sell healthy food, and that companies don't dump the prizes of unhealthy food in poor neighborhoods. And then there is a whole different conversation about food security, but that is a much bigger picture debate.

cogsblogs23

Personally, no - I'm the heaviest I've ever been in my life, and along with my self-esteem being significantly lower than any other time in my life, I am experiencing ailments I've never felt before which I know to be weight related, and I am holding myself back from doing things I probably would feel either physically or mentally equipped to do if I were thinner. Accepting fatness for me would mean that I should accept a lower quality of life and I won't.

I was in a relationship with someone who was genuinely NOT affected by my weight, and embraced my size. As nice as it was to know he didn't care what size I was, I ballooned during that relationship. His acceptance of my fatness spilled over to me accepting it for a period of time, and living a really indulgent lifestyle. I take full responsibility for MY size, nobody is shoving food down my throat, but looking back, I definitely think having a support network which positively encourages healthy habits as opposed to embracing fatness is definitely better.