I've never known thin

Curvalicious_Cat
Curvalicious_Cat Posts: 19
in Introduce Yourself
Hi all! Wanted to introduce myself. I'm 33 and happily married but miserable in my body and clothes. I have dealt with weight almost my entire life (since about age 8). I've never been smaller than a size 16 as a teen and from there have graduated to a size 26/28 now. Currently 357 and growing, at least I feel like it everyday.
I swear I'm not that big, in my head, then I see a pic, reflection, try on clothes or look in a mirror and fall into depression which makes me want to eat. I constantly crave junk food and have the hardest time going a day without it or without giving into my cravings but I don't want to give up.
This is my 5 time using MFP but the only honest time. I've never been so open about my weight till this week. I'm taking a new leaf, reaching out for others who know and understand and I'm being honest with myself. This is an extremely hard battle and I can't do it alone. I'm praying for help and hoping for the best but if I'm being honest right now, I'm afraid I'll fail like I normally have. I hope I prove myself wrong.

xoxo

Replies

  • eugenedhampton89
    eugenedhampton89 Posts: 1 Member
    Thx for sharing I believe in you!!! This is will the hardest thing you ever done in your life....how rewarding is it just knowing that if you accomplish your goal....if you can do this then u can do anything!
  • kimlynn919
    kimlynn919 Posts: 316 Member
    Hey hun, I can relate... I'm also 33, but I'm a single mom. The smallest I've been in the past 20 years, was 20 years ago in 7th grade...I was 4'11" (still am that) and 137lbs. Still got made fun of for being fat, even though I wore a size 7/8. I was that size for only a month or two before I gained all the weight back that I had lost over the summer (in 6th grade i was 185 and size 18, during the summer my stepmother put me on atkins diet and i lost the weight), I gained it back and let my self esteem suffer because my stepmother told me i would never be beautiful as her 6 yr old daughter and how id always struggle anyway. I was the chubby nerd no one would want and my step sister was going to grow up and get married and be taken care of.

    Anyway, last month is when I turned 33. 4 days later I was put on blood pressure meds. Although, it probably shouldve been done years before (i got denied birth control like 4-5 years ago because of b.p.)
    ...but i digress, I've finally decided enough is enough and i need to get healthier for my daughter. So i'm taking it slow, but i'm working at it, and I think this time around when i get it off, i will keep it off.


    So, thats my story, well, some of it....Please feel free to add me! :smile:
  • joyfuljoy65
    joyfuljoy65 Posts: 317 Member
    Hi - I have sent you a friend request cos I so know how you feel. I was put on a diet at age 1!! I have struggled with weight all my life and it has taken me to age 48 to finally feel as if I have conquered it (even though a little voice still sits in my head saying 'Ha you can put it all back on you know'). And MFP has been the tool to help me - who would have thought that just counting calories, being honest about my daily intake, and finding good friends to support me and who I support in return, would have such a dramatic effect.

    the weight I have lost has taken a year and 3 months...... we didnt put our weight on in 5 mins, it aint going to come off in even 10...... but if you can stick it, commit to the change, it will work. Don't listen too much to all the people who will tell you to eat this and eat that, drink 20 pints of water a day etc.... each person has to find out what works for them..... read the posts yes, but take the advise there with a pinch of salt. We are all enthusiastic amateurs after all ;)

    All the best in your journey to the weight you want to be - there will be mountains to climb but as the cliches say - the view from the top is fantastic :D

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