Im scared to death to have a cheat meal/day!!! HELP.

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Okay so first of all I eat super healthy and clean everyday. Tons of protein and all that good stuff. I usually have soccer 2-3 times a week and go the gym once a week. I never eat more than 1200 calories a day, I havent had more than 1200 calories in 8 mionths actually! I do have a cheat meal though once a week but I always make sure it stays under the 1200 calorie range. The thing is, today is my birthday! And all my friends want to go out and eat and stuff. IM TERRIFIED. I always have to skip out on eating and going out with them cause they eat SOO much.. and they would get sassy with me if I didnt eat or if I ate smaller/healthier. But they are all saying "Its your birthday!! COME ON!! HAVE FUN!!" And I really want to.. but im so scared Ill gain weight:( I just want to go out and not even count calories.. not even care if its super unhealthy.. I want to have fun for once and not skip out on life and go out and have fin with my friends! Im 18 Female 5'9 and 137 lbs. I am so so scared. What do I do?! They want to go to U-Swirl, Starbucks, and IHOP! Its kinda a tradition we all do on our birthdays but I always skip out on it cause im scared to eat unhealthy and gain weight. I just want to be normal and not count the calories and not worry about the calories. Oh please please help me.. Im terrified. Do you think ill gain weight?? Should I just go for it? Help me! Please! Thanks soo much!
11 minutes ago - 4 days left to answer.
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Replies

  • helenrosemay
    helenrosemay Posts: 375 Member
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    You'll only gain actual weight if you eat over 3500 calories, which equals 1lb in weight.
    You may gain water weight, but that will soon go down once you go back to eating healthily.
    If you want to have fun on your Birthday then do so. Looking at your stats it's not like you're far away from your goal weight so it won't harm you.
  • diannethegeek
    diannethegeek Posts: 14,776 Member
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    You will probably gain weight after a cheat day. It will be water weight, not fat. http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/993576-why-you-gain-weight-if-you-eat-more-than-your-cut

    At your age and activity level, you should probably be eating more than 1200 calories a day anyway. A refeed day would probably be good for you! I would really recommend that you find out your TDEE (total daily energy expenditure). This will tell you how many calories you'd have to eat before you start gaining fat. It might help to put 1200 calories into perspective: http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/

    Additionally, I think you might want to reconsider the unhealthy relationship with food that you're developing. If your diet is ruining your birthday or time out with friends then it doesn't sound very healthy or sustainable to me. I've been there. I've been the one who cries in a restaurant because they didn't have the burger substitute I ordered. I told everyone I was fine. I really thought that I was. But I wasn't and I needed some help to see it. Take a hard look at your diet and see if you're fine or not.
  • janer4jc
    janer4jc Posts: 238 Member
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    It's YOUR birthday. It seems like it should be YOUR choice where to go. I get that it's a tradition but it seems like you should be able to pick somewhere that you're able to eat what you want.

    Go ahead and have a cheat meal/day - just plan for it in your calories prior to the day (and maybe a little after too).
  • geekyjock76
    geekyjock76 Posts: 2,720 Member
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    You mention you play soccer: Are you an athlete? If so, why are you eating only 1200 calories at your weight and activity level? No offense, but it seems every time I read these threads where people are quoted as being "scared to death" to increase calories, it's always from someone with an unreasonably low caloric intake when all things considered. Having such fears is not healthy at all and is an example of the negative mental adaptations that occur from chronically assuming larger than necessary deficits and can manifest into a serious issue.

    If you are a very active 17 yr old, and haven't fully matured yet, you also run the risk of not reaching peak bone mass by restricting so much.
  • Confuzzled4ever
    Confuzzled4ever Posts: 2,860 Member
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    wowza... just go.. you wont' gain any real weight from it.. Hell I ate pop tarts and over 2000 calories 3 days this week and i lost pound. (go figure!) I havent' really been exercising either..

    It's a new concept for me honestly too.. but just do it.

    I mean seriously.. i want someone to take me to uswirl (assuming ice cream??) starbucks and Ihop!! mmmm get the ligonberries on your pancakes!!! So good!!!
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
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    Just do it. Geez, don't beat yourself up. Life happens!
  • CoffeeNBooze
    CoffeeNBooze Posts: 966 Member
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    Girl, your post honestly makes me a little sad. Don't be so afraid of food!!! Food is not the enemy, stop letting it control your life. Have fun on your birthday. It's ok to enjoy food....it really truly is. Food is meant to be fuel and to be enjoyed. So have what you want to have, especially on your birthday. Here's my best advice; Eat what you want, but don't eat to the point of being bloated or nauseous. You will feel much better if you can enjoy yourself without getting to that point.
    This is no way to live. Let me know if I can help more.
  • krystina_letitia9
    krystina_letitia9 Posts: 697 Member
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    You'll only gain actual weight if you eat over 3500 calories, which equals 1lb in weight.
    You may gain water weight, but that will soon go down once you go back to eating healthily.
    If you want to have fun on your Birthday then do so. Looking at your stats it's not like you're far away from your goal weight so it won't harm you.

    Clarification: You'll only gain weight if you eat an EXCESS of 3500 calories.

    Go enjoy yourself, then return to normal tomorrow.
  • bagge72
    bagge72 Posts: 1,377 Member
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    Don't call it a cheat meal, and just eat a meal with your friends.

    Also if you are eating a cheat meal every week, and are still under your calorie goal, then you really aren't eating a cheat meal.
  • j6o4
    j6o4 Posts: 871 Member
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    You're fairly active, which means you calorie needs are probably much higher than 1200 even if you are trying to lose weight. 1200 net is the minimum more a female and is more directed to short females who lives sedentary life style. In your case you are not even netting 1200 calories because the amount of physical activivties you are doing and the fact that you dont go over 1200 calories. 1200 net means that if you burn 300 calories from exercise, you need to eat 1500 calories to net 1200.
  • SoLongAndThanksForAllTheFish
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    If you dont go and eat at least 3-4000+ calories to celebrate your birthday and average out your past months a little more, you've failed your birthday indulgence break! (you need a trip to Round Table for dinner in there -- whats a birthday without pizza?). :)

    Its almost impossible for ONE day to really matter, if you eat under 1200 cals even on "cheat days" then you DONT have "cheat days" (this implies over calories, I guess you are using it for "outside food intake type goals"). If you want to do some math on it to prove whats "OK" and show how silly it is to worry about one day theoretically ruining the last 8months, just don't eat over (8mo x 30days x +200/day calories for you for a good active diet =) 48,000 calories and you'll still probably average out great. :P Pretty impossible to do unless you are entering into an eating competition championship and manage not having your stomach pumped.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
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    I ate almost 1000 over my calories on Wed.

    Seriously- I had had 1700 by the time I was done with lunch and I hadn't even had anything crazy. Yogurt/fruit/protein + bruschetta/chicken salad.. had a big ole pile of steak and grilled zucchini when I got home- and then ice cream. Darn bread sent me right over.

    Guess what. I still went home and had my ice cream.

    I did the math for the week- I'm still UNDER my maintenance average. Weekly averages are way more important than day to day numbers.

    and as a 17 year old athlete? You should be eating WAY more than 1200 and be more concerned with building strength and being better- harder stronger faster- and less about losing weight- unless you're seriously over weight as it is.

    I'd stop worrying about the weight and start training to be faster- let that drive you. No way you should be paralyzed with fear at going to hang out with your friends.
  • amduran07
    amduran07 Posts: 1 Member
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    I know how you feel don't over indulge yourself your body will let you know when its full enjoy your birthday
  • Mokey41
    Mokey41 Posts: 5,769 Member
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    Wow, you are so setting yourself up for an eating disorder. You are already severely undereating and now obsessing about not eating with friends. I'd tell you to just go have a good time but I think what you really need to do is get some professional help to find out where you're getting these feelings from and get it sorted out.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
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    1200 is probably way too low for you, so enjoy it, I'm sure your body will thank you for it...
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
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    Wow, you are so setting yourself up for an eating disorder. You are already severely undereating and now obsessing about not eating with friends. I'd tell you to just go have a good time but I think what you really need to do is get some professional help to find out where you're getting these feelings from and get it sorted out.

    ^Agreed with this
  • rileyhunter169
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    Girl, If you don't go and eat at least 10,987.4453 calories and partially replenish yourself from dieting like a retard (I did the exact same thing believe it or not); and hold it in like a woman then.... Then you will disappoint me. You should be eating 3,000 a day to be healthy; enjoy yourself today, have an eating contest. Half way kidding.... Then increase your calories 200 a week; until you are eating 2500-3000. Plus; see a psychologist; from a guy who learned the very hard way; you will probably start in on some eating disorder if you don't get your mind in the right order; so see counselor (which might help with apparent low self esteem); maybe even a registered dietitian. Because being afraid of a little weight gain eating calories at a level of quarter your age is not a game. I apologize if I got the gender wrong. But girl; your right on the line, so go get some help; cuz crash dieting, low self esteem and over fixation on weight when your already in a high risk group is bad business. I've seen and had it happen in my own life; it can really spiral downhill with a tiny touch, and that hole goes deep and the sides a filled with mud. Also don't be too embarrassed to speak up about problems, it takes a lot of courage to come clean with your issues; male or female; dog, cat, blue, green, I don't care. If it makes you feel any better; handsome sensitive muscular guys like me like some more meat on da bones so we don't accidentally snap things up. I'm kind of joking around; but you got the point.
  • da_bears10089
    da_bears10089 Posts: 1,791 Member
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    solid first post.