You know whats hard....

GemFB
GemFB Posts: 104 Member
edited September 18 in Motivation and Support
All of my friends are skinny or have the mindset that it's better to be overweight and/or obese than to loose anything. A few of them are morbidly over weight...It makes it hard to lose weight when you are craving Cold Stone and your friend decided it's a great idea and buys it in front of you....Even my b/f has this mentality....

I just don't know what to do...I can't lose weight when it feels like my world is against me....

Replies

  • GemFB
    GemFB Posts: 104 Member
    All of my friends are skinny or have the mindset that it's better to be overweight and/or obese than to loose anything. A few of them are morbidly over weight...It makes it hard to lose weight when you are craving Cold Stone and your friend decided it's a great idea and buys it in front of you....Even my b/f has this mentality....

    I just don't know what to do...I can't lose weight when it feels like my world is against me....
  • abbychelle07
    abbychelle07 Posts: 656 Member
    We are with you! I know what you mean though, my husband actually gave me a huge hunk of bread with tons of butter on it at 8pm last night. I gave it back to him, and he kept asking me why I wasn't eating it. Hello? Because I am fat! He knows I am logging my calories, but just doesn't get it sometimes...
  • LaVida_1
    LaVida_1 Posts: 1 Member
    So have the child sized portion! You can't lose weight and keep it off if you think "diet". You have to think "Lifestyle". You can make adjustments. I find keeping the journal helps because you can pretty much eat what you want - just smaller servings. The more veggies and fruits, whole grains you include in your daily diet, the better you will feel and the more satisfied. Also only keep healthy foods at home. And drink LOTS of water. Thirst can masquerade as hunger and you eat when you're really thirsty. Good luck!!:wink:
  • GemFB
    GemFB Posts: 104 Member
    My b/f is 360 lbs...He just thinks it's funny being that big...I keep telling him it's scary. I'm only 186...but I want to be back to 150...He just doesn't understand why I want to go for walks all the time...or go to the gym. I wish he did.
  • GemFB
    GemFB Posts: 104 Member
    Thanks for the water tip...I am very guilty of drinking like 5 diet cokes a day.
  • Mary24
    Mary24 Posts: 398
    My husband offers me food all the time and I just keep telling him that I'm trying to lose weight not gain.
    I think men have a verry small brain, at least my man does. I have to keep repeating myself over and over again, and 5 min latter he's forgotten and offers me food or alchol, somtimes he has the stupides eexcuse and says" thers no cals in alchol" It can be really hard somtimes but since I joined this site I dont feel so alone.:flowerforyou:

    Were all here for each other:flowerforyou: we all know what we want and its the same thing for every one, to lose weight!:flowerforyou:

    Mary:smile:
  • sindyb9
    sindyb9 Posts: 1,248 Member
    I know it is hard. My son and his father are the same way. I now kick them out of the room when I want to exercise and just let them hold it when they try to hand me food I know I can not have. It is very tempting but I am learning to say no. except for last night we had breakfast for supper and they left me alone with bacon and sausage, I had egg beaters instead of eggs but I ended up having both bacon and sausage too I had enough calories for but still now that I have been eating healthy I feel like crap today. I wont beat myself up today I just went back and started all over again eating the right foods and turned down the ones I can not have. Dont worry about them and trust me your doing the right thing take care of YOU is my point. :flowerforyou:
  • GemFB
    GemFB Posts: 104 Member
    See I don't know how much this site has helped me. I mean, I know there are a lot of ppl trying to lose weight like I am...I just think most have more motivation...My job means I have no choice but to be thin...And sometimes I think that's the only thing motivating me...Oh and swimsuit season lol...I don't have any friends on here...I don't have many at home that have the motivation....It just feels lonely trying to do this.
  • buckeyebabe
    buckeyebabe Posts: 235
    I think the problem is, for me anyway, is that I looked at food as the evil enemy. It's not, it's my mind set that is vile. I still eat a cookie, daily if I want to. I will eat a piece of bacon, or even have...oh my goodness....my absolute favorite splurge...a glass of nice red wine. All I do before I have it is say how many calories the item is (outloud-just to make it real) and think about how many minutes of running it is too burn that, or what % of my net calories it will be if I do eat the item. Often times I find myself putting the food down, some times I don't. I just know that eating is a compromise between the calories I can have and how few of items I may want to eat for the day! :tongue: I have to admit, there are those days where I'd rather drink a % of my calories and consider 1 of my 5 servings of fruit a glass of really nice wine!:drinker:
  • buckeyebabe
    buckeyebabe Posts: 235
    Hang in there GemFB. After a few weeks it really does get easier and you get more empowered the more weight you lose. You will see. Give yourself some time and some encouragement. We can all be our own worst enemy and who needs that when we are struggling with one of the hardest challenges that has ever been put in front of someone..."dieting"!
  • buckeyebabe
    buckeyebabe Posts: 235
    Hang in there GemFB. After a few weeks it really does get easier and you get more empowered the more weight you lose. You will see. Give yourself some time and some encouragement. We can all be our own worst enemy and who needs that when we are struggling with one of the hardest challenges that has ever been put in front of someone..."dieting"!
  • buckeyebabe
    buckeyebabe Posts: 235
    Hang in there GemFB. After a few weeks it really does get easier and you get more empowered the more weight you lose. You will see. Give yourself some time and some encouragement. We can all be our own worst enemy and who needs that when we are struggling with one of the hardest challenges that has ever been put in front of someone..."dieting"!
  • banks1850
    banks1850 Posts: 3,475 Member
    Well, I'll say 2 things here. 1st, don't lump all the guys together, I and my wife are both eating and exercising healthily and I have always tried to respect her habits even when I wasn't with her in the process, sometimes I was misguided, but never trying to cause her problems. Now that I am with her in it, it's nice because we eat the same stuff, discuss nutrition and exercise, and can eat out together without feeling guilty. But not all guys are at this point. 2nd I feel that if guys are doing this stuff either 1 of 2 things are happening, 1st is that they were never properly instructed on the "rules". I.E. you don't offer horrible, tempting food, you don't laugh, degrade, or make fun of someone trying to eat healthy, and you never EVER interrupt someone or try to stop them from exercising. Or second they are inconsiderate.

    Best idea that I can think of is confront them, ask them if they care that you are trying, if they do, then please ask them to listen to you and help you instead of being horrible about it. If they don't care and they admit it, drop em because they aren't the person for you!
  • GemFB
    GemFB Posts: 104 Member
    Ty...I'm happy to get a guys side on it!

    I have discussed this with him...He says he wants to...But then doesn't...He also tells me he likes me the way I am and not to worry about my weight so much. I just wish he'd make a commitment...I told him if he lost 100lbs in the next year I'd buy him a motercycle...That seems to have perked his interest...lol
  • ali106
    ali106 Posts: 3,754 Member
    oh you are so not alone !!

    I loved your little bug in his ear about the motorcycle....lol....shhh don't tell my hubby he wants one sooo badly...and ya know w/ gas prices I'm almost tempted to say yes....lol

    I think you just have to stand your ground....tell him why you are doing it, why you need to do it...tell him that you feel better when you're eating healthy, exercising, losing weight and geting stronger...a happier you means a happier him LOL...he'll get the picture I'm sure!

    wishing you luck!
    hugs,
    Ali
  • abbychelle07
    abbychelle07 Posts: 656 Member
    I hope people are more supportive of you soon. I told my family that I am trying to be healthy, and also am avoiding dairy (mostly because it is a weakness!) They took awhile, but now expect that I am not going to eat all the food they make, and they stopped bringing me treats!

    Eating out is the hardest! I actually went to KFC yesterday, but ordered a Twister meal...no sauce on the Twister, corn on the side instead of fries, and water with a splash of lemonade instead of soda. I was so proud, but a little jealous of the mac and cheese that others were eating. Yummm...

    Go, me!
  • fitladyfawkes
    fitladyfawkes Posts: 138 Member
    Cold Stone = My Mortal Enemy. Ha ha i have come to see that there seems to be two kinds of people: people who just need a little taste to satisfy their cravings, and people who cant stop at one little taste and have to eat the whole waffle bowl full. Figure out which kind you are, and if you are the kind that cant stop with a taste, then dont put yourself in the situation. Even if it means going next door to the health foods store, while your friends who dont need to lose weight shove their faces with ice cream that is not going hurt them in the least. :noway: But if you are one of those blessed people who can stop after one spoonfull, well then good on ya and just stop at one spoonfull, dont buy one for yourself, just mooch off of someone else for a taste. This works with anywhere or anything you eat. ( well at least for me)
  • DianneLynn
    DianneLynn Posts: 156 Member
    I don't what COLD STONE is exactly so I can't relate but I do love Pizza and I do love Lays Potato Chips.
    If my family were to bring that into the house and eat it...I wouldn't be in the same room and I would insist they eat it all; but my svelte daughter and hubby just wouldn't do that to me.

    You really gotta wonder about those you call friend and those you love if they know something means alot to you and they do that to you ESPECIALLY when you are trying so hard.

    All I can say to you is:

    GEM....YOU decide what's right for YOU and YOU JUST DO IT! and YOU do it any which way you can.

    Fact:
    Feeling good about yourself is a great way to be...you can dare to dream and make those dreams come true because you have SELF ESTEEM and CONFIDENCE.
    People die of obesity related complications on a daily basis.
    FAT people are discriminated on a daily basis. When I was at my heaviest it always seemed that people were interested in what "the fat lady" was going to order. Some pity you. Some are disgusted by you. And some just laugh. If you are lucky, you get to be invisible (sighs)
    Clothes are sooo much fun!
    Life is wonderful when you feel good about yourself.

    Smiles...Banks you are "one in a million"..laughs

    Some people are just mean. When I last worked, I worked with 3 Betty Crocker types who were alot older than i was. I was never a sweet eater so when they brought in Christmas goodies I would have a nibble and compliment their baking skills. I brought in goodies which they wouldnt touch because they said I didnt eat enough of what they brought....isnt that borderline mental????
  • briblue72
    briblue72 Posts: 672 Member
    I don't what COLD STONE is exactly so I can't relate but I do love Pizza and I do love Lays Potato Chips.

    Cold Stone is just about the best ice cream ever. You start with a base flavor - vanilla, chocolate, birthday cake, etc. - and then choose toppings that they mash into the the ice cream on a cold stone. So you can create your own yumminess - vanilla with gummy bears and reese's pieces? chocolate with brownie bits and sprinkles?

    Be glad you don't have one nearby...
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