Lost in a sea of self doubt.

GemFB

I'm a bit discouraged lately....I lack the motivation around me to actually eat better. I tried today by eating soup salad and breadsticks at olive garden...that was 800cal! Crap....So now for dinner I only get something small or blow the whole day...I have a gym membership...But my b/f won't go with me and I lack the motivation to go on my own...I just need some damned support...but I don't have anyone to get it with.....

:::sigh:::

GemFB

I'm a bit discouraged lately....I lack the motivation around me to actually eat better. I tried today by eating soup salad and breadsticks at olive garden...that was 800cal! Crap....So now for dinner I only get something small or blow the whole day...I have a gym membership...But my b/f won't go with me and I lack the motivation to go on my own...I just need some damned support...but I don't have anyone to get it with.....

:::sigh:::

Mary24

No one can do this for you, your the only one who can dont wiat around for your bf once he starts to see you getting up befor up befor he does to go to the gym he's gonna wanna tag along, it may also be that he's scared of loseing you if you lose the weight,

Dont do it for him do it for your self, it tock me a long time to figure out!:flowerforyou:

jill5677

Losing weight takes work. If it doesn't, you're not doing it right. It's a HARD lesson to learn, but until you're ready to WORK, you'll never be able to do it.

If you're going out to eat, go online and check calories before you go. There are things you can do at restaurants to make things healthier (i.e. order dressing on the side, breadsticks w/o butter, etc). In general, going out to eat is hard, so if you can't plan, I would suggest not going.

As for the gym, you can't rely on someone else to motivate you. You will need to find that motivation yourself. If going to the gym is awful, go for a walk. If you can't do that, go swimming. If not, rake your yard. If not clean your house. if not do a work-out tape. If not go rollerblading, ride a bike, go for a hike, hell! you can go DANCING and burn calories. Just be active.

You can do it! You're on this site, which means you have the desire to do it, but know that while this site is a good tool.... that's all it is. A tool. If you don't follow the plan, you won't lose weight. it's that simple.

Good luck, I hope you can find your motiviation!!!!!
We're all rooting for you!

FitKitty

I agree with Mary24. Nobody IS going to DO THIS FOR YOU. If you lack the motivation to work out think of it like this...
The gym is your place to be alone, chill out, have peace of mind, and look / feel great when you leave (it work for me). You may be shocked by how fast the days problems just seem to go away!

Yesterday I ordered an audio book from itunes and listened to it while working out. a 25 min. cardio is hard for me but today I did 45 min. I just couldn't put the book down (or in this case I couldn't hit the mute button).

I like to work out in the morning, and it helps me eat better all day. I was 206 lbs just a few years ago, and got down to 164 lbs. I gained it all back when I had a boyfriend who didn't want to work out with me, and I felt too shy to go alone (I had just moved to a new town). I gained it almost all back, and one day I said... "WAIT... I am better than this!!" I ditched the couch potato at home and i started working out again. That was a few months ago. I went from 203 to 186!

delanahub

If you have an unsupportive boyfriend my advice, get a new boyfriend. My husband and I choose a healthy lifestyle together and I would have never married anyone who did not share my values. Life is too short and you are too young to be fat and miserable...the gym is a great place to meet freinds, especailly when you are there everyday, people notice, you look familiar, and they will talk to you. Be a strong woman and use your power!!!

banks1850

Gem,
Getting started can be hard. It was hard for all of us on here. People have made some good and correct suggestions to you. If you really want to do this, the first thing you need to do is commit. Commitment doesn't come from outside, it comes from within. If you commit, the rest becomes a lot easier. Don't just want to go to the gym, go. Forget your BF, if he comes, fine, but right now, he's a crutch, forget about him, just go. And if you go out to eat, do what people have suggested on here, also, ahead of time, find places that have good menu's and suggest them for places to go.

We can't make others do for us what we aren't willing to do for ourselves.

Like the nike commercial said: "Just DO it!"

GemFB

I am trying....I did notice that Noodles and company's food isn't too bad...Same with panera....Olive garden is really bad... I don't eat mcdonalds, arbys, burger king, taco smell, wendys....I know chinese isn't horrible...and I try to steer us away from buffets...

GemFB

I agree with Mary24. Nobody IS going to DO THIS FOR YOU. If you lack the motivation to work out think of it like this...
The gym is your place to be alone, chill out, have peace of mind, and look / feel great when you leave (it work for me). You may be shocked by how fast the days problems just seem to go away!

Yesterday I ordered an audio book from itunes and listened to it while working out. a 25 min. cardio is hard for me but today I did 45 min. I just couldn't put the book down (or in this case I couldn't hit the mute button).

I like to work out in the morning, and it helps me eat better all day. I was 206 lbs just a few years ago, and got down to 164 lbs. I gained it all back when I had a boyfriend who didn't want to work out with me, and I felt too shy to go alone (I had just moved to a new town). I gained it almost all back, and one day I said... "WAIT... I am better than this!!" I ditched the couch potato at home and i started working out again. That was a few months ago. I went from 203 to 186!

I think if I found a night time gym I would go more...I am a night person...It's hard enough trying to get up for school in the morning and get my kiddo to school...

ali106

hmmm do you work too? if not go after you take your child to school....if you do work, then you need to schedule sometime for you hon...plenty of gyms are open until 9 and even 10pm around here, I'm in Mass....I'd call around or look online for the hours....just make one step towards doing it a day...you'll get there!!!
hugs!
Ali

arejay

Like everyone said, getting started is the hardest part. If you're b/f doesn't want to go to the gym then see if you can find another friend that will go with you, or maybe find a partner at the gym. Partners are a great source of motivation, they'll make sure you stay on track and vice versa. Another motivation for you might be the n shape guys there, no I know you have a bf, but a little eye candy to get you motivated to go to the gym probably won't hurt.

FitKitty

I agree with Mary24. Nobody IS going to DO THIS FOR YOU. If you lack the motivation to work out think of it like this...
The gym is your place to be alone, chill out, have peace of mind, and look / feel great when you leave (it work for me). You may be shocked by how fast the days problems just seem to go away!

Yesterday I ordered an audio book from itunes and listened to it while working out. a 25 min. cardio is hard for me but today I did 45 min. I just couldn't put the book down (or in this case I couldn't hit the mute button).

I like to work out in the morning, and it helps me eat better all day. I was 206 lbs just a few years ago, and got down to 164 lbs. I gained it all back when I had a boyfriend who didn't want to work out with me, and I felt too shy to go alone (I had just moved to a new town). I gained it almost all back, and one day I said... "WAIT... I am better than this!!" I ditched the couch potato at home and i started working out again. That was a few months ago. I went from 203 to 186!

I think if I found a night time gym I would go more...I am a night person...It's hard enough trying to get up for school in the morning and get my kiddo to school...

Here in TX we have 24hr fitness, but if you cant go to the gym, than bring the gym to you. Start with a DVD or 2 or 3. Point is to put down the chips and get your butt in gear.

GemFB

hmmm do you work too? if not go after you take your child to school....if you do work, then you need to schedule sometime for you hon...plenty of gyms are open until 9 and even 10pm around here, I'm in Mass....I'd call around or look online for the hours....just make one step towards doing it a day...you'll get there!!!
hugs!
Ali

I start school at 8am on tue thu and go until 9pm....I start at 9 on wed and Fri and go till 9...I work on tuesdays in between classes and on weds inbetween class... Monday is my studying day...Kids in daycare and I do all my work.....

I'm not making excuses...It's just on sat and sun all I wanna do is catch up on the sleep.

GemFB

Like everyone said, getting started is the hardest part. If you're b/f doesn't want to go to the gym then see if you can find another friend that will go with you, or maybe find a partner at the gym. Partners are a great source of motivation, they'll make sure you stay on track and vice versa. Another motivation for you might be the n shape guys there, no I know you have a bf, but a little eye candy to get you motivated to go to the gym probably won't hurt.

Lol....True enough...There are some major hotties at that gym too...All the non college guys my age use that gym...

TY for the advice...Unconventional but good!

eperkins

Tough schedule . . . ever thought of doing small time slots. 10 minutes here, 20 minutes there. There are some great exercises you can do for minute increments throughout your day. Even if you just walk for 20 minutes in between classes will help get you going. I once had a doctor say to me that I was worth at least 10 minutes a day. That got me started, not quite at the weight I want to be but I have lost 10 lbs and working on the next 10 and am up to 20 min a day, 3 x's a week . . . baby steps. Don't make your routine daunting. Do what you can, you results will come slower but you will weigh less in two weeks than you do today. :happy: :happy:

cmriverside

~ Move and your heart will follow~

Helawat

Like everyone said, getting started is the hardest part. If you're b/f doesn't want to go to the gym then see if you can find another friend that will go with you, or maybe find a partner at the gym. Partners are a great source of motivation, they'll make sure you stay on track and vice versa. Another motivation for you might be the n shape guys there, no I know you have a bf, but a little eye candy to get you motivated to go to the gym probably won't hurt.

Lol....True enough...There are some major hotties at that gym too...All the non college guys my age use that gym...

TY for the advice...Unconventional but good!

I was going to the gym by myself for a long while but started to make friends through the group fitness classes. Now I can't find time to go to the gym alone!

If you need someone to go with you, you need to meet other like minded individuals and a great place to do that is the gym.

If motivation is a problem, I highly suggest using the exercise classes if your gym provides them. The instructors at the UNLV gym do a great job motivating us and keep us going.

Only you can do this for you. Keep that in mind.

GemFB

Like everyone said, getting started is the hardest part. If you're b/f doesn't want to go to the gym then see if you can find another friend that will go with you, or maybe find a partner at the gym. Partners are a great source of motivation, they'll make sure you stay on track and vice versa. Another motivation for you might be the n shape guys there, no I know you have a bf, but a little eye candy to get you motivated to go to the gym probably won't hurt.

Lol....True enough...There are some major hotties at that gym too...All the non college guys my age use that gym...

TY for the advice...Unconventional but good!

I was going to the gym by myself for a long while but started to make friends through the group fitness classes. Now I can't find time to go to the gym alone!

If you need someone to go with you, you need to meet other like minded individuals and a great place to do that is the gym.

If motivation is a problem, I highly suggest using the exercise classes if your gym provides them. The instructors at the UNLV gym do a great job motivating us and keep us going.

Only you can do this for you. Keep that in mind.

They are about 45 bucks a class...I have a hard enough time affording the membership...I am afterall a mom with a 200 bi weekly pay check...I know at my college I can use the pool...I thought about dropping my membership...but the free daycare while I work out was too enticing...It doesn't help that the gym is 25 min away either.

fitladyfawkes

Hey girl, i know where you are coming from, been there done that. There are still weeks that i feel the same way. I think what actually gets me through is noticing the huge difference that i feel in my body everyday when i am eating in my calorie intake and exersizing. You know that amazing feeling you get when you have just had a hard core workout at the gym and you walk out those doors feeling ten feet tall? Yeah i LOVE that. Also try to recognize how you feel after you eat something really high in calories. My body starts to feel like it wants to go into hybernation mode, and that i just want to sit down and veg. But when i eat something good for me, i feel wonderful, and even if i may not be a size 4, i feel alot less heavy. Anyway, i hope this helps even the tiniest bit.
Keep Truckin!