Would you chop off your own foot so you could run again?

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Seems a bit counter-intuitive, right?

So, 3 years ago I was in an accident that rearranged the bones in my foot and ensures that I am in pain any time I am standing or walking, that I can only walk short distances, and will never ever run again. Even if I could tolerate the pain, my toes will not bend so I literally just fall over when I try.

A few months ago I went to an event that I had been excited about going to ALL YEAR. It was a 4 day thing. Halfway through the first day I was in so much pain, even with my doctor prescribed percs, that I was completely incapacitated. By the time I got home I was literally crawling everywhere because I couldn't stand up.

The next day i broke out the MUCH LOATHED wheelchair in an attempt to salvage the event. It sucked. Much of where we were going was NOT wheelchair accessible or required going up enormous hills that were IMPOSSIBLE for me to get up.

I can walk. I have my foot, but I have lost a part of myself. The part of me that was active, adventurous, and did fun and exciting things. Now I measure EVERYTHING by how much pain it will cause.

Lately I have been looking at amputee athletes and I find myself feeling JEALOUS as absurd as that sounds. They can walk, they can run, they can even JUMP.

I want to do those things again!

There aren't a lot of other options for me medically. Three surgeons have already told me that what little they could do for me would only marginally help the pain.

So I'm considering amputation because I want my LIFE back.

Would you do it? Would you cut off your own foot so you could run again??
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Replies

  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
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    no question: yes.

    good luck getting a surgeon to agree though. :/
  • unhgoose
    unhgoose Posts: 122 Member
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    I would.
  • pittbullgirl
    pittbullgirl Posts: 341 Member
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    I would, if it were an option. Take one part of my body away to make the rest of my body healthier- YUP!

    Have you talked to your Drs about this even being an option?
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,871 Member
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    what about cycling or something that is less impact. I don't have anything nearly as severe as you do I suppose..but I have some messed up feet and can't run anymore without having to spend the next week or two on crutches or with my cane...but I've found a love of cycling and actually enjoy it far more than I enjoyed running I think. I can certainly cover a lot more ground and have been exploring some really wonderful trails lately.
  • WalkingAlong
    WalkingAlong Posts: 4,926 Member
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    No, I would take up swimming or something not painful.

    Is there any guarantee an amputation will even mean pain-free running? I would be worried that running on a prosthesis would be just as painful. And that I'd have 'ghost pain' from the foot still.

    I had a relative with terrible foot pain whom they did some sort of nerve-deadening shots on.
  • thickerella
    thickerella Posts: 154 Member
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    what about cycling or something that is less impact. I don't have anything nearly as severe as you do I suppose..but I have some messed up feet and can't run anymore without having to spend the next week or two on crutches or with my cane...but I've found a love of cycling and actually enjoy it far more than I enjoyed running I think. I can certainly cover a lot more ground and have been exploring some really wonderful trails lately.

    I actually HAVE taken up cycling. I love cycling. It is absolutely the best thing that I have done since the accident. If I could take my bike everywhere, I would. Unfortunately, that is not an option.
  • traceybarkworth73
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    no- i work for a disability benefit, the amount of amputees we have who suffer from phantom pain and recurrent abcesses-not an easy option x
  • AntiSocialyte
    AntiSocialyte Posts: 28 Member
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    I would.
  • jwdieter
    jwdieter Posts: 2,582 Member
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    Nope. I've considered this as well, but the aesthetic and everyday consequences are highly negative. Embrace what you can do.
  • RoyBeck
    RoyBeck Posts: 947 Member
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    Oh poor you what a horrible thing to be in so much pain :(

    You should do whatever you feel is best. If you could live as an amputee for the rest of your life then I'd say yes. Good luck.
  • FrnkLft
    FrnkLft Posts: 1,821 Member
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    Actually yeah, I mean if there aren't any other real options, I would totally cut the foot off.

    Also, amputated limbs freak me out honestly, but just thinking about it now, having just a foot missing is not a big deal for me at all. Just in case you wanted that kind of perspective too.
  • ghiagirl893
    ghiagirl893 Posts: 69 Member
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    It sounds like it really affects your life. I would remove it. After talking to my doctors and finding out the potential problems, and how long it would take to heal, and chances of pain remaining. I would hate having to give up hiking and such
  • thickerella
    thickerella Posts: 154 Member
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    no- i work for a disability benefit, the amount of amputees we have who suffer from phantom pain and recurrent abcesses-not an easy option x

    I would love to know more. Can I PM you? I really have trouble imagining that the pain I would feel as an amputee is worse than the pain I feel now, but I have a lot of questions. If there are downsides, I want to know.

    My SO and I were researching ways I could do next year's event without the wheelchair.

    http://www.especialneeds.com/images/D/meywalk-2000-gait-trainer-12.jpg

    THIS "dignified" thing was the best we could come up with.

    Am I really wrong for thinking THIS would be better?

    http://dogbytesonline.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/11489004-945x735.jpg?f7148e

    Also, check out THIS awesomeness!

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/rf/image_404h/2010-2019/Wires/Online/2013-11-08/AP/Images/Marathon High Heels.JPEG-0d4bb.jpg

    PROSTHETIC HEELS! I could wear pretty shoes again!
  • thickerella
    thickerella Posts: 154 Member
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    Oh poor you what a horrible thing to be in so much pain :(

    You should do whatever you feel is best. If you could live as an amputee for the rest of your life then I'd say yes. Good luck.

    Aww! What a sweetie you are! I'm really touched by your compassion and sincerity.
  • thickerella
    thickerella Posts: 154 Member
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    Nope. I've considered this as well, but the aesthetic and everyday consequences are highly negative. Embrace what you can do.

    Would you mind elaborating? At the moment I only see positives, but I imagine that my perspective is somewhat skewed. I would love to hear some rebuttal.
  • allaboutthecake
    allaboutthecake Posts: 1,531 Member
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    Similar instance....medicine has evolved...am sending you a PM....:flowerforyou:
  • thickerella
    thickerella Posts: 154 Member
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    Similar instance....medicine has evolved...am sending you a PM....:flowerforyou:

    Thanks!!
  • thickerella
    thickerella Posts: 154 Member
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    I would, if it were an option. Take one part of my body away to make the rest of my body healthier- YUP!

    Have you talked to your Drs about this even being an option?

    The arch of my foot inverted and the bones are slowly crushing each other with every step. If I don't get a bone-fusion surgery, turning my foot into a solid slab of bone, I will eventually have to have it amputated anyway.
  • jwdieter
    jwdieter Posts: 2,582 Member
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    Nope. I've considered this as well, but the aesthetic and everyday consequences are highly negative. Embrace what you can do.

    Would you mind elaborating? At the moment I only see positives, but I imagine that my perspective is somewhat skewed. I would love to hear some rebuttal.

    Well, I can't run due to a chronic calf condition. Can walk, can bike, can lift, can do everything except run. After years of physical therapy. Since I spent the first 30 years of my life running and engaging in running sports, this situation led to some depression (as in, years of). The frustrating part, of course, is I could run if I cut my leg off below the knee. But what I'd gain (the ability to run), is for me not worth the every single day dealing with missing part of my leg, and needing a prosthetic for every activity I can currently do without a prosthetic. So I swept up the ashes of my former activities, and refocused on enjoying what I can still do. So I'm the strongest I've ever been, and happy when I look in the mirror. Good enough.

    However, your situation is described as a bit more severe. If you're unable to even walk around or balance without severe pain, you're not talking about just wanting to run again, you're just going for basic functionality. You need equipment (?) to move around anyway. It's not that huge of a stretch concept. Still, don't think you'll be able to find anyone to cut your foot off, so you'll need to find a different solution. I'd still recommend figuring out what you can do physically, and trying to think positively toward those things. You can still be strong and beautiful, and that ain't bad. Best of luck.
  • castlerobber
    castlerobber Posts: 528 Member
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    Lately I have been looking at amputee athletes and I find myself feeling JEALOUS as absurd as that sounds. They can walk, they can run, they can even JUMP.

    I want to do those things again!

    There aren't a lot of other options for me medically. Three surgeons have already told me that what little they could do for me would only marginally help the pain.

    So I'm considering amputation because I want my LIFE back.

    I have read of someone who had an elective amputation like this. I think he's a doctor himself. He had been badly injured in an accident as a young man; they patched his foot and leg back together, but the foot was weak, and eventually could no longer handle his activity level--plus, like you, he was in a lot of pain.

    His surgeon was able to choose where to make the cut for the best result, and grafted a piece of bone in such a way as to strengthen the leg to handle the impact of running with a prosthesis. It took something like a year of healing before he could start running, and it was awkward for a long time after. But he finally was fitted for a prosthesis that worked well for him, and ended up being glad he'd done it.

    What a decision to have to make...good luck to you, whatever you choose.

    ETA: Googled a bit and found the story in an old Runner's World: http://www.runnersworld.com/runners-stories/life-and-limb?page=single