Who do you tell?

fotofreak01

So, I've been back to MFP, for what seems the thousandth time, for a little over 2 weeks. I have found that I'm crazy motivated to eating better this time and I think it's because I haven't told a lot of people about it this go around. I'm a card carrying Facebook addict. I attend weekly meetings...via facebook I only have close friends and family on there, I don't add a bunch of random people or people I barely know. I'm an open book when it comes to FB. I say what I think, when I think it. All my other attempts to lose the weight came with my friends/family on FB and my co workers knowing. I was always told, when it came to getting healthy, "tell people. It makes you be held accountable." So I did. Apparently, I didn't care whether or not they approved because I always quit..lol. So this time, the only people that know about my changes are me and my MFP friends. My husband doesn't even realize I'm doing it. I don't talk about how many calories I have left to eat at the end of the night and he doesn't see me weighing/measuring food when I cook. This has worked wonderfully for me. I eat all that I'm supposed to and I look forward to cooking my meals. So my question is.....who do you tell? Do you keep it to yourself or do you sing it from the rooftops? And how has it worked for you? What has been the general reaction?

Unknown

This content has been removed.

Keiras_Mom

I lost my weight with alternate day fasting, so there was no hiding it. I told my family and my coworkers, and friends, but only if they were interested and asked. I did not post anything on FB or any other "public" venue. Once the people who had to witness my eating schedule were informed, I rarely mentioned it again. It worked great. I never had anybody question my choices or my dedication. Everyone was very supportive.

ThePlight

Love the dress, too.

AZ_Gato

OMG, your stool is to die for.

Unknown

This content has been removed.

Unknown

This content has been removed.

Unknown

This content has been removed.

fotofreak01

I love your shoes.

Thank you! Who doesn't love a nice 3 inch hot pink open toed heel.

fotofreak01

I lost my weight with alternate day fasting, so there was no hiding it. I told my family and my coworkers, and friends, but only if they were interested and asked. I did not post anything on FB or any other "public" venue. Once the people who had to witness my eating schedule were informed, I rarely mentioned it again. It worked great. I never had anybody question my choices or my dedication. Everyone was very supportive.

First of all, congrats on such an amazing loss!! Second, I found that most of the people that knew prior would respond with, "but you're so (insert insincere adjective here) and you aren't really sick any, why would you want to lose weight"? Trying to explain that I am trying to get to a point where I don't feel like poo sometimes just goes over their heads. I don't want to be skinny. I want to feel good daily.

fotofreak01

Love the dress, too.

Thank you! I pinupgirlclothing.com

fotofreak01

OMG, your stool is to die for.

Yes, it was quite an amazing stool. You should have seen the contract and scumbag agent I had to deal with in order to get it to work with us. I'm happy to have this picture with it though. I read a report in the news that it had been thrown/pushed/jumped into a fire and is no longer with us.

fotofreak01

Going for the minimalist approach with the decor there. I would've gone a different way myself..

Your opinion has been noted, I'll be sure to pass it on to my photographer. Thank you.
:drinker:

MysteriousMerlin

I've told just a handful of people: mom, husband, 1 friend and 1 co-worker. The friend and co-worker are also both working on bettering themselves, so it's easy to talk with them about it.

brisingr86

On a serious note, do it for yourself.
Good luck.

I agree here. Maybe with the telling everyone you were expecting the external validation/encouragement where as keeping it to yourself, you know the motivation has to come from within. Most of my friends and my immediate family know that I'm working at losing weight, but I don't give them a lot of progress reports or anything. What's worked best for me is having an MFP friend that I exchange regular (at least weekly if not daily) messages with, but it's always still on me. But that's ok, because that's who I'm doing this for; I want to be healthier. I want to feel comfortable in my own skin and like how I look in pictures. Sounds like you're in a similar place. Good luck. Especially through this holiday season.

wolverine66

OMG, your stool is to die for.

that's just gross.


ooooh...i see... never mind

sabified

I love your shoes.

I too, am in love with your shoes.

As for your question- I don't *not* tell people, but I don't tell them either... does that make sense?

If people ask me how I'm losing weight, I tell them- because I don't want them thinking I'm doing some fad and it's working so they should do it too.

But I don't go out of my way to tell people- the only ones I really talk to are my SO, because he's in it with me and sometimes my family but that's usually to avoid eating whatever oil drenched thing they're having (and they usually disagree with me and say that "I'm obsessed"... but eh, whatever).

and LOL abt your stool comment. Seriously, great pic though!

k2charmed4u

My husband knows how determined I am this time round and it's great because he's doing it with me. I don't believe in telling people so you're held accountable etc as I usually make myself accountable. At the end of the day if you're determined it's only yourself you're cheating if you don't count the cals and watch what you're eating. I've been a type 2 diabetic for 6 years and my last blood test was 8 so they wanted to throw medication at me and I refused. So my husband and I are signed on to an NHS weightloss program which is free and starts in january for 12 weeks. I'm looking forward to it.

seltzermint555

I am NOT a public weight loss/diet person at all!!

In the past I worked in an office that wanted to do a "biggest loser" competition within the office and I flipped the eff out, even writing a huge essay-type letter to upper management about how inappropriate that would be, and how it would make people feel singled out and uncomfortable (especially ME)!

Now, I see the appeal for *some people* of being very public with their efforts, and finding a support system among others. But I still prefer that to come only from MFP friends who are in the same boat, and my very nearest and dearest (husband, mom, best friend).

Only recently have I alluded to any weight loss efforts on facebook, on a friend's page. He's gone from 316 to 265 this year so I wanted to show some support letting him know I am doing something similar (he uses another app). We only have about 8 mutual friends who could see the post, but I even mentioned my weight (current and highest) and that was hugely unusual for me!

seltzermint555

As for your question- I don't *not* tell people, but I don't tell them either... does that make sense?

If people ask me how I'm losing weight, I tell them- because I don't want them thinking I'm doing some fad and it's working so they should do it too.

But I don't go out of my way to tell people

Yes! This exactly.

Although...I find that most people do NOT believe it's just calorie counting on a website, and push to ask about the fad diets anyway :-/

Timshel_

So, I've been back to MFP, for what seems the thousandth time, for a little over 2 weeks. I have found that I'm crazy motivated to eating better this time and I think it's because I haven't told a lot of people about it this go around. I'm a card carrying Facebook addict. I attend weekly meetings...via facebook I only have close friends and family on there, I don't add a bunch of random people or people I barely know. I'm an open book when it comes to FB. I say what I think, when I think it.

Kinda out of a general observation, which may be way off, so take it for the price you paid, but you sound a bit compulsive with your mindset. Maybe it is just your phrasing and wording, I dunno. But I might make some suggestions that can help.

First, I would suggest not worrying about who knows or such. That is of no consequence at this point and people *will* know your hard work as it happens, which is good feedback to know you are doing things right. You can grab a few friends who might be on the same journey and 'talk shop' with them, but generally trying to include a bunch of people in that journey just adds too many people telling you what you need to be doing, which can be counterproductive. And honestly, personally two kinds of people I immediate remove from my newsfeed on FB are those overly-motivated fitness people, and those who get out of relationships and just post-happy about being single or posting those graphics about trust, love, etc.

Next thing is to NOT be "crazy" motivated. It is great to be excited to getting on to a healthy lifestyle, but when people go too crazy or try to make too many huge changes quickly, they tend to lose quick, but fall off and gain back even quicker. Take time to make small changes, celebrate those small successes, and then build on those to make even bigger changes. I only say that because you mention having tried many times before and there is a saying that the definition of insanity is continually trying the same process over and over and expecting different results. Do it smart, do it easy, and do it right.

Anyway, probably more that you asked for, but hope something in there helps.

Best of luck! Plan the work then work the plan.

Cheers.

fannyfrost

I don't necessarily tell people.

I do however, often post my workouts on Facebook. I did it a couple times for accountability, tell a friend, now I do it as a bit of a joke.

I did post when I lost a bunch, I wanted a little acknowledgement. However, I find that if you tell too many people about what you are doing they work hard to sabotage you. Or they want to know what you are doing and why it doesn't work for them. On the other hand, a heavy co-worker started exercising and changing her bad habits (fried food all the time) after seeing what it did for me. Working with other people going to the gym, etc. So there is inspiration in sharing, but you don't need to always be public, sometimes public makes it worse.

FYI, my mom and my husband are the worst for sabotage. Mom will say things "like you shouldn't eat that" when it is perfectly within my choices for the day or hubby buys candy:(

fotofreak01

So, I've been back to MFP, for what seems the thousandth time, for a little over 2 weeks. I have found that I'm crazy motivated to eating better this time and I think it's because I haven't told a lot of people about it this go around. I'm a card carrying Facebook addict. I attend weekly meetings...via facebook I only have close friends and family on there, I don't add a bunch of random people or people I barely know. I'm an open book when it comes to FB. I say what I think, when I think it.

Kinda out of a general observation, which may be way off, so take it for the price you paid, but you sound a bit compulsive with your mindset. Maybe it is just your phrasing and wording, I dunno. But I might make some suggestions that can help.

First, I would suggest not worrying about who knows or such. That is of no consequence at this point and people *will* know your hard work as it happens, which is good feedback to know you are doing things right. You can grab a few friends who might be on the same journey and 'talk shop' with them, but generally trying to include a bunch of people in that journey just adds too many people telling you what you need to be doing, which can be counterproductive. And honestly, personally two kinds of people I immediate remove from my newsfeed on FB are those overly-motivated fitness people, and those who get out of relationships and just post-happy about being single or posting those graphics about trust, love, etc.

Next thing is to NOT be "crazy" motivated. It is great to be excited to getting on to a healthy lifestyle, but when people go too crazy or try to make too many huge changes quickly, they tend to lose quick, but fall off and gain back even quicker. Take time to make small changes, celebrate those small successes, and then build on those to make even bigger changes. I only say that because you mention having tried many times before and there is a saying that the definition of insanity is continually trying the same process over and over and expecting different results. Do it smart, do it easy, and do it right.

Anyway, probably more that you asked for, but hope something in there helps.

Best of luck! Plan the work then work the plan.

Cheers.

There is a lot here that is spot on. I would tell people because for some reason, I thought they might be able to shame me into sticking to it?? Typically before, I was doing this because someone would ask me to do it with them, they needed a "diet buddy". This time I just decided a few things. 1. I miss hiking so I've got to get to a place where it's fun and not a possible death sentence for me. 2. I really REALLY hate spending a lot of money on food that does nothing but make me more sick. and 3. I always tried too much at one time. I would stop eating out, hit the gym for an hour at a time and stop smoking, all in the same week. Overkill? I think so...lol. I am going to get the eating healthy under control first. When I feel like it's not such a struggle, I'll attempt to stop smoking and move on to daily exercise. Thanks for the tips!

fotofreak01

FYI, my mom and my husband are the worst for sabotage. Mom will say things "like you shouldn't eat that" when it is perfectly within my choices for the day or hubby buys candy:(

My husband is the worst!! His diet consists of coke, candy and cake. And never gains an ounce. Almost everyday, he brings me a candy bar when he gets home from work. My freezer has about 6 in it right now. I started taking them to work and giving them away. It would hurt his feelings if he knew I wasn't eating them...lol.