The myth of willpower?

lisa0527

Reading through this community's "willpower" threads I've felt the need to comment. The topic has definitely been on my mind recently, and these are just my thoughts.

I don't think there's an overweight person who doesn't wake up most days and say "today's the day I start losing weight". They grit their teeth and prepare to use their "willpower" to resist "bad" food, and "eat less", or as my mother used to say "diet like mad". It works...for a few days, maybe a week, maybe two. And then they slip...and the guilt and negative self talk starts. You know how it goes..."you're a loser", "you have no willpower", "how could you be so 'bad'". And then the diet disappears in a sea of guilt, shame and frustration...because "I don't have willpower" and "diets never work."

I was a card carrying member of that club and my success with myfitnesspal has caused me to seriously re-evaluate that thinking. I've come to the conclusion that success has more to do with having a "reason" to lose weight (not based in shame or guilt!, or the need to please others), clearly defined, reasonable and achievable goals, and the right tools and information. For me myfitnesspal was the right "tool" and this forum has provided me with the right "information" and after years and years of trying...finally success that seems sustainable(35 pounds and many inches in 9 months).

I work in health care and I have applied this approach with patients dealing with weight concerns, and with mental health concerns such as anxiety and depression. It has been amazingly successful and empowering for people. And no shame or guilt or "willpower" involved whatsoever.

So thank you to this community for all the support, info and encouragement. Thanks for the reminders to be kind to myself, to set reasonable goals, to not lose hope during plateaus and to use the right tools and trust they'll work in the long run. It's changed my life.

trudijoy

I think people confuse willpower with forcing themselves to do the 'right' thing. For me, willpower is deciding what I want, and taking steps to make it happen. I don't need to force myself then, because I'm doing what I want. People admire my willpower and drive to succeed, but really, it's just how I do stuff.

Dream it, believe it, approach it, achieve it.

likearadiowave

Reading through this community's "willpower" threads I've felt the need to comment. The topic has definitely been on my mind recently, and these are just my thoughts.

I don't think there's an overweight person who doesn't wake up most days and say "today's the day I start losing weight". They grit their teeth and prepare to use their "willpower" to resist "bad" food, and "eat less", or as my mother used to say "diet like mad". It works...for a few days, maybe a week, maybe two. And then they slip...and the guilt and negative self talk starts. You know how it goes..."you're a loser", "you have no willpower", "how could you be so 'bad'". And then the diet disappears in a sea of guilt, shame and frustration...because "I don't have willpower" and "diets never work."

I was a card carrying member of that club and my success with myfitnesspal has caused me to seriously re-evaluate that thinking. I've come to the conclusion that success has more to do with having a "reason" to lose weight (not based in shame or guilt!, or the need to please others), clearly defined, reasonable and achievable goals, and the right tools and information. For me myfitnesspal was the right "tool" and this forum has provided me with the right "information" and after years and years of trying...finally success that seems sustainable(35 pounds and many inches in 9 months).

I work in health care and I have applied this approach with patients dealing with weight concerns, and with mental health concerns such as anxiety and depression. It has been amazingly successful and empowering for people. And no shame or guilt or "willpower" involved whatsoever.

So thank you to this community for all the support, info and encouragement. Thanks for the reminders to be kind to myself, to set reasonable goals, to not lose hope during plateaus and to use the right tools and trust they'll work in the long run. It's changed my life.

Will power doesn't exist. Self control does.