3 kids, no sleep, no motivation, no willpower, HELP

ntftnm

Anyone else out there w 3 kids under the age of 6? Baby still doesnt sleep through the night...up 2x at least. I'm so tired and discouraged. The few days i do good I'm so proud, then I lose any sort of self control and just eat and eat and eat. (ps i'm nursing) And I'm ashamed of my lack of will power...what do u busy moms do to stay on track or reward yourself for doing well? How many cal are u eating? What keeps u motivated? How on earth do u find time to exercise? Man i sound so pathetic....poor me....lol (I do know I did this to myself and I need to fix it). Any friends for an overeating, overtired, overweight, over it and trying to gain control mom?

eaglemom24

How are you doing? I have a similar life in time management and lack of time, although with 2 kids under the age of 3. I was also diagnosed with breast cancer this past May and have undergone a double masectomy, 4 months of chemo and currently doing radiation. Additionally, I have added taking classes this fall to my list of things going on. So this fall has been nuts! I've had to try to manage all of this and keep up with my sleep in order to manage my health. Have had no time for nutrition, working out, and managing my healthy should be top priority right now. Got about a week and a half of classes left, get through the holidays and then starting an exercise and nutrition program after Christmas. Health and wellness will be top priority for me! It has to be....to recover from the effects of cancer treatment. Just need to rebuild my body and wellness...I keep telling myself that I need to do this for my girls...to make myself strong for them, teach them how to live a healthy lifestyle, and be around for a long time for them. My kids are all the motivation that I need! Best of luck to you...do it for your kids! We can follow each other and motivate each other, if you want....Mom to Mom...doing it for our kids!

Iron_Lotus

I have 6 kids 2 of which are 21 month old twins. I am tried and have almost no time to do anything but I make a point to carve out some time to workout, because I deserve it. It's important to me and I want it, badly! Workout when the baby naps, put in a video for the other kids or an activity they don't get to do very often to keep them occupied while you workout.

DoingitWell

At one point in my life, I had 4 kids ages 4 and under (a set of twins included). And I worked full time and was in graduate school with a dumb husband. Take solace in knowing that even 15 minutes of exercise makes a difference, making one healthy choice a day makes a difference, and that they will not be babies forever. Do what you can right now and stop putting so much pressure on yourself. My oldest are 9 (twins) now and I still struggle, but it will get easier. One of the things you NEED to do, is understand that taking time for yourself does not make you selfish, or a bad mom. You have to do it for your sanity. So as soon as your SO comes home, walk out the door and take a brisk walk.

alyssa92982

Once I got into the habit if exercising it kinda just clicked that it was a daily thing, I'd actually feel guilty for not working out- no matter how tired I was. Once u push yourself it will get that way for you to be a part of your day, for half hr or an hr, you'll feel so much better:) good luck

Mia_RagazzaTosta

I have three kids but they're older (13,9,6). I want to be fit and healthy more than I want to continue being fat so I make it a priority to work out. I usually do it in the evening at home. As for calories, I aim for 1600 daily.

I've been at this for almost a year. It hasn't been easy but it's always been worth it.

minimalistmom

First things first. Breathe. You are trying which is the first step. I am getting ready to be in a similar boat. I have 2 (under the age of 6) with one on the way (due in 11 weeks). I homeschool, I help my husband with work for his business, I manage the house, so I'm just as tired. My philosphy is, if I exercise, I exercise. Yoga has been my thing lately. If I'm hungry, I eat. Mainly when the stomach grumbles and I try to think healthy. If I'm tired, I let myself close my eyes for a few minutes. It stops me from grazing the refridgerator. MFP has me set at 1880 calories. Some days I eat just that, some days I go over. Every day is different. When it comes to motivation, I think of how good I feel, how the little bit of movement I do makes the body feel good and rejuvinated.

It's going to be different when I have 3 kids myself, but I plan on still keep up with I do or trying at least. For a good start, focus on how you eat. Exercise can come later. Do it for your kids, because they are watching you. That's what I tell myself every day.

LosingItForGood13

I have 3 kids but only one under 6 and what motivates me is each day that I have to take a BP pill is another day I hate it. Once my 4 yr old is on the bus I run to the Y usually or I turn on the WII or pop in a exercise dvd u have to sneak in workouts when they are taking a nap or whatever eating lunch u could do stand up squats. My calorie intake is 1375 Ive tried 1200 calories that wasn't for me yet I guess as I lose more weight then can drop it to that level again.

kgeyser

I have two kids, a 6 year old and an 18 month old, and the baby is up at least 2 times a night if not more. I hear you on being tired. Lack of sleep really screws me up as far as eating, I start eating anything I can get my hands on because my body needs the energy so badly. I've started letting some things go and heading to bed early. I also drink a bottle of water whenever I feel hungry, and if I'm still hungry after 20 oz of water, I eat a little something. Nap time is my only workout time - I've been doing T25 because it's only 25 min and that allows me to get in a workout and a shower. I know you know how precious a shower can be.

My only advice for getting on track is to worry about one thing at a time. If you decide to exercise, just focus on getting in your workout and don't worry about the rest, even the eating. Once you've made that change and it has become part of your routine and your family's routine, then tackle the eating. Or vice versa. I would be rocking in a corner in a fetal position if I tried to make drastic changes to both diet and exercise at the same time. I'm on Week 8 of my fitness program and I am just now starting to work on serious changes to my diet. I definitely feel better from exercising, and adding in that time has helped me keep everyone on a schedule, because I really don't like to miss my workout. Or my shower.

ETA: I'm nursing as well, which is why I'm so tired. My toddler has no interest in giving up nursing and when she wakes up at night that's all she wants to do, meaning that no one else can get her back to sleep. I kinda wanted to kick my husband last night on my second trip to her room in an hour as he was happily snoring away.

ntftnm

Thank you guys, some very good points here, i really have not been taking time for me. As said I AM lucky when i get to shower all alone, with the bathroom door closed the WHOLE time...so exercise seems like a far off dream. Especially now that its freezing cold, too cold and slippery to try get out with baby. I'm going to try going by myself right when he comes home though, it would be nice to have a bit of exercise while I put my brain back in...

I must admit, Nights I'm home and have to get up and nurse baby repeatedly sometimes I 'trip' and kick the bed really hard just so his sleep gets interupted too. Lol. Usually it doesnt even affect him, but i feel better. Sad......such small thrills....

I feel for those of u with health issues, how scary, but more power to u! Changing your life to improve the body you were given strong brave women we are. I too am in this from a bit of a health scare, i was having chest pains w high blood pressure. Plus the overall feeling of being stuffed into a body with skin a size too small....and of course i dont want my kids to be like me, overweight and afraid to join in...i want to be physically able to play volley ball and catch with them, without passing out from exhaustion.

I forgot to tell you guys i also work 3rd shift 3 nights a week. (but i am tired all the time and i get larger chunks of sleep when i work nights.).

I'm curious what types of meals u eat? Do u cook seperate for yourself or just do portion control? What healthy meals do u make that the kids love too? For us i'm trying to use a lot of vegatables with anything else I make so i can load my plate heavy on the veggies, light on the meat.

ArtemisRuns

I have been where you are, but my 3 kids are older now (9, 11, 16). Those years are such a blur. The more you can do for yourself now, the sooner you will recover (your body is still recovering from birthing 3 times in 6 years) and the better you will feel. I don't have any magic words for you, but I know how tough it is and you need to ask your dear husband to take a night shift a couple of times a week to give you some uninterrupted sleep.

ntftnm

Lol. Im not laughing at u, but my husband (a good man who i love) is more of a monster than a man when he doesnt get his sleep. I would love to sleep a bit more but yikes, to suffer through his grumpies......its a toss up....

eathealthyandrun

My gym has a childcare room. It makes it a lot easier to fit in exercise, and I actually look forward to going to the gym to have some "me" time. Is that an option for you?

metaphoria

May I ask your height, weight and calorie allotment? With breastfeeding, you should have a couple hundred extra calories more than a non-breastfeeding woman with your build. If you give me some info I could run a few numbers for you. It could be that you're just not getting enough calories to support your body's basic functions, plus activity, plus breastfeeding. Babies tend to literally suck the energy right out of you.

100toloose

My kids a little older now,but I used to take them for a walk... looong walks ,sometimes for hours. And the older one was riding a bike..You might have to get the oldest one involved! The 2 little ones can watch you dancing or do Zumba with you.. I hope it helps.. Even if you break it down to couple of shorter workout per day,you will still feel fantastic! And enjoy the time with the babies now becasue they grow up waay to fast!

ntftnm

5 ft 2 in
192 lbs
1580 calories and I've been adding my nursing calories in as -26 x oz pumped which when I pump is 4 oz. So I figure a -104 cal in when I nurse but i think nursing shes getting more than i do pumping. I read some site that said nursing uses 20 to 26 cal per oz. But i could be doing this wrong? So far when i hit the calorie target i lose weight but i tend to go over:(

Childcare room....i will def look into this.....i had no idea....exercise, gyms, calories all strange new ideas to me....obviously....

I asked for zumba for christmas:)

MrsKMaree

I have found that since I've been working out consistently this past month, I have more energy and I can deal with the sleep depravation ALOT better!

Plus I LOVE the alone time if I can wrangle babysitting with Hubby/ Grandma!

Otherwise in the pram we go ...

Something I found helpful in the first few days was exercising as early in the day as possible, I didn't give myself time to make any excuses or get hi-jacked by the kids!

metaphoria

Ok, I ran some numbers and your BMR (basal metabolic rate) is 1626. This number is how much your body needs just for living if you did nothing but sit or lay down all day. It does not factor in breastfeeding or cooking or changing diapers or any other regular activity. Your TDEE is 2200 (total daily energy expenditure) if set at light activity. A couple hundred more if you really are up on your feet for the day. So your goal is to aim for a number between these two calculations, which will give you a healthy deficit in order to lose weight. Remember, these haven't even factored in breastfeeding or exercise, yet.

I suggest aiming for 1800 per day, and when you exercise, eat about 75% of it back. Most people tend to overestimate their workouts and MFP is notorious for too-high burned calories for each workout on top of that. Also, measure or weigh as much of your food as you can so youre not accidentally going over your allotment for the day.

Hopefully the couple hundred extra calories from these calculations help you out.

I used the calculators on a site called fitnessfrog.

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ntftnm

Thanks for figuring out my calories, i will try bump it up a bit. Ive been having to calculate my cal by hand instead of logging when im home seems easier to have a running tab instead of tryn to make my phone work in my house....#$@%&%$ cellphones. Sooooo tired. how much sleep does a person really need..... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz