Motivation! Work out buddies?

ashleyliebenthal

ive always been a yoyo with my weight. about 6 years ago i was weighing in at 120kgs. i hadnt realised how big i was, or was still getting.

I moved in with my best friend and his flat mate, but was boarding free as i didnt have a job which meant my friend was paying for everything. I felt bad if i ate any of their food as i hadnt paid for any of it. My meal sizes started getting smaller and smaller. I was trying to not touch their food as much as possible or eating things i wouldnt think they would notice was gone e.g. one egg with a crust peice of toast for lunch, one apple for breakfast.

My friend was in the fashion industry and said he needed a model. He said i would be perfect but i dont have the right body. I was devastated. I had never considered myself large (even though i clearly was) and this comment hurt me more than anything else. I think this was around the time i stopped eating. It wasnt hard because i was hardly eating anyway (at this pinot i had already lost 10kg from cutting down my food intake). No one noticed at first that had stopped eating, and i sure wasnt going to point it out to anyone. I was tired, grumpy, pale, lightheaded, bruised easily. But i was losing weight which made me feel amazing.

My friends who i spent every day with didnt notice my weight loss at all because he seen me every day, i neither did i at first. It wasnt until i would go see other friends or go back and visit my family and they would mention how much weight i was losing. i had cut down to eating an apple every two to three days. If i had dinner with someone i would hardly eat then throw what i did eat up later on.

After 3 months i had lost 45 kgs. i was unhealthy but i felt on top of the world because i knew i had ost serious weight. i started working and thats when i started eating again because i needed the energy and i was around food a lot. i was always self conscious of eating infront of people after this though.

That was 6 years ago and my weight has always moved up and down but averages on 75kgs. I think its been harder to keep my weight constant after what i did to my body back then.

I am now on a dietary plan at my gym and am currently in my 6th week of "construction". When i started i was 78.2kgs and i weighed in today at 73.1kgs. Im slowly on my way to sliming down in a heathy way so it will stay off for good! With the right motivation and the right mindset i can hopefully conquer my body battles once and for all!