Can I start over AGAIN?

LisaC1026

I've been a member of MFP for just over a year now...and I'm finding that I weigh pretty much the same 1 yr later. I've had a lot of personal circumstances that consumed my life over the past year (found out our dog has cancer, lost my job, almost got a divorce, dealing with the overwhelming losses we've had over the last few years) Simply put, I've struggled this last year. I don't know if there's any other way to explain it. Maybe it was a necessary year, there was so much grieving to be done. I've devoted so much time to sorting things out. Owning my feelings and trying to figure out where do we go next. In the midst of trying to emotionally figure myself out, I wasn't able to work on the physical or health aspect. I tried...on many occasions. I'd usually lose about 15-20 pounds and then turn around and gain 1/2-all of it back.

What can I say one year later? I've brought myself in touch and in the moment with a lot of feelings that have been needing to be dealt with for years. I've cried....a LOT. I've thoroughly enjoyed being laid off from a HORRIBLE job and I've enjoyed letting myself just have me time this past summer. I loved every minute of being home with my daughter and working on getting our home life to a stable, NORMAL place. This summer has been about my family and I've loved every bit of it. I enjoyed going to Zumba and eating whatever I wanted (of course, based on tasting good...not healthy) - and as a result I've physically felt like crap for the past 2 months. I've had headache after headache. Bloating, tummy aches, tired, irritable, back aches, the list goes on and on. I realize that I miss FEELING GOOD, healthy good. Despite how much I try and deny it....the food I eat has an enormous impact on the way that I feel. Eat crap = feel crappy. Eat good = feel GREAT, healthy, vibrant and full of life!!!

My PCOS and endometriosis appear to both be in full swing and I'm not laying my fate in the doctor's hands ANY MORE!!!!! I've had every bit of 9+ surgeries (seriously...I lost count a long time ago), countless hormone treatments, shots, pills, meds, the list goes on and on and nothing is any better yet. If anything, I'm worse off than I used to be. I have a follow-up appointment in a little over 2 weeks to have an ultrasound and biopsy done due to the findings of my appointment last week. It is my personal promise to myself that I am NOT going to walk into that office feeling the same way I did last week. Enough is enough. Time to start over taking it one day at a time. I'm done making unrealistic expectations and then beating myself up every time that I fail, which I always eventually do. I'm not going to deprive myself of the things I really like, but I am going to consume things in moderation. Depriving has only led to binges for me, so it's time to break that ugly habit. Today I will push play (it's a Beachbody slogan) and get back to what encouraged me to join MFP one year ago....feeling great! :drinker:

knittygirl52

Welcome back! Sometimes we need several "false starts" to really get into the race.

For what it is worth, I've been working through a book called the "Beck Diet Solution." It isn't a diet, but is a book on how to change your thinking about food and exercise. Some of the lessons feel a little silly at first, but I've made myself do them anyway, and I can honestly say that I am mentally more prepared to lose weight than ever before. Which is making the actually process of losing weight easier than it has ever been before.

Best of luck to you, and of course, you can start over again! That's the good news!

Nina74

You can start over again.

Like you, I was a complete mess a year ago (not the divorce stuff, but some unhappy stuff). I'm finally in a good place, including a job I generally life (vs. a job that was eating me alive). I tried to diet then, but was never successful. I'm finally successful because I am happy, in general, with my life.

You might be interested in "Perfect Health" by Deepak Chopra - explores the mind/body connection of Ayurveda. I saw a holistic nutritionist last year and through her, this book and many other things, I feel like I am evolving. Our emotions have a great deal to do with our bodies, disease and health than we realize.

Zita_Jenn

You are on the right track... good for you!!! Here is to starting a new healthy start.:drinker:

fitterpam

Been there done it. Every time I start it is a new beginning. You have to let the past pains and hurts go in order to get better for you.

Dealing with PCOS and endo is a tough thing and absolutely negates your efforts so please keep working with your doctors otherwise, I've found, no matter how hard you try, you can't seem to get ahead. I've read a lot over the last couple of weeks and everything seems to point that for PCOS you need to eat a diabetic diet (50% carbs, 30% fats, 20% protein) in order for your body chemistry to respond and continue responding. Make sure your carbs are whole grains and your fats are good fats. Also, you need to cut sugar intake.

I'm on the same road - this is my 4th real attempt in as many years because things just get too hard to focus on everything at once. My PCOS is under control medically right now - well sort of, but I'm consistently seeing 2.2 lbs a week for the most part. Your medical issues will get better with proper diet and exercise so that should be a good motivator at the beginning. The more you can do with diet and exercise, the less you'll have to do with medical treatments.

Good luck!

RMX82

Good luck with your fresh start!

bevkaysmith

We all need a fresh start from time to time. Just take a deep breath every morning
and realize it is a new day .... everyday is a new start..... I pray God will help you with
your troubles...God Bless

nbingham

You can absolutely start over again! Like you, I was in a really bad place for quite a while. (Death of both my parents, losing my house to foreclosure, my young son contracting leukemia, the death of my Akita dog Hachiko who was like my baby, Divorce, etc.)
I wasn't at a place in my life where I could concentrate on ANYTHING except all the loss.

But now that I'm past all that, I know I'm going to get this weight off and so can you! Welcome back to MFP! We'll all get through this together! :bigsmile:

BarbKern

I call it Practice! The more you practice the better you get! Each day is a new day, time for more practice. Good luck!
BK

themommie

Of course you can start over AGAIN. I think most of us have started over at least once when it comes to weight loss. Hope you get your medical problems under control. Not being healthy can really wreck havoc on your life.Make time for you and get healthy so you can feel better and you will loose weight in the process. You can do this. Sorry to hear it has been such a rough year.

MissKim

Welcome back Lisa! You are a wonderful and strong person who has been through soooo much!!! and you just keep getting stronger everyday! and ofcourse you can start over again! everybody trips up and lets life get in the way. honestly it's hard to take care of yourself when you have so much going on!!! but at least you recognize what makes you feel better and can do it! and you can! and you know I'm by your side! I love you girl!

nalia08

Sometimes we all need to start over again. It's a trial and error process until you finally figure out what works for you. Good luck on your new start and know that you have many others on MFP supporting you!

lutzsher

I "restarted" every Monday morning from November 2009 to early May 2010. I got serious at that point and haven't needed a "restart" since.
Hey, the beauty of life is that we can "start again" any day, every day is an oportunity to hit that "reset" switch!

stormieweather

Welcome back, Lisa! I was part of your "A New Me" group last year too. :flowerforyou:

I'm not progressing on the scale much, but hey...I am amazingly healthy! I am off all stimulants (energy drinks, herbs like ma huang and ginseng, ephedrine, etc.) and have babied my adrenal glands to a healthier state. My strength in the gym has doubled. Yesterday, I did 3 sets of 12 reps of leg presses at #270 pounds! Last summer, I thought #150 was good...haha! I am having a great time experimenting in the kitchen with natural foods. I am not worried about what my pounds are doing, but instead, how I feel. And it feels good to take care of myself.

You can start over any time you want. And feeling great over the long run beats instant gratification...almost all of the time.

hooghie

You've already made a HUGE 1st big step- you came on here and you poured your heart out. You've recognized that you FEEL better when you're healthy and you crave that feeling. You've already restarted! Congrats!!

I know how hard it is to get through the initial food and exercise hurdles but I also know that once you start feeling and seeing the results, it gets so much better. With exercise, I'm finally at a point where even if I REALLY don't want to go, I force myself because I know how great I will feel afterwards no matter what tricks my mind plays with me beforehand. With food, just take baby steps- small changes. You know what works for you and do not deprive yourself. I try not to go overboard too often but I still eat things that I really love that are bad for me sometimes- just in moderation. I had an ice cream cone outside in the sun yesterday (I ice cream) and it was awesome but I only got a single scoop and I ate a smaller portion lunch so I could have it and I don't indulge like that every day. That's just one example.

Once you see the difference in your body and in your clothes, you will be even MORE motivated. Try to focus on that and get through the first few weeks knowing that it only gets easier.

You've been through A LOT worse things than this and you've come out ahead. YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!!! :flowerforyou:

kiffypooh

Welcome back!! I've missed you!!!!