Lapse in motivation-please remind me what I'm doing here

april1445

I'm having a lapse in motivation. I am realizing that I really don't know why I'm trying to do this. I'm fairly content at size 16--most of the time. I love my husband and he loves me. I'm average fitness. I don't look better as I lose weight due to genetically bad skin (thanks mom and dad). I was a size 22 in high school, and my skin's never recovered from that. As a result of that, I tend to look worse as I lose weight, and I have a jiggle when I move(what plastic surgeons call a delay) that no amount of exercise is ever going to fix. It's tough to keep working at it. I need some reminders of what I'm trying to do here please? :ohwell:

eugovogue

Forget that you're doing it for looks, and maybe keep in mind you're also doing it for internal health! Be motivated that every inch, pound of fat you lose, the more happy your insides are, the better your organs will function, and the longer you'll live! Often people seek to weigh less for vanity reasons (like me--I'm not even going to lie), but when you keep in mind how glorious exercise and eating right is for your health and longevity, you can't help but smile and keep on keeping on!

Good luck

piratebear1

I know where youre coming from as Hubby and I are both 'Loveable n large' and both like each other on the larger side - fairly active and happy being slightly bigger.

But my main reason was my constant migraines - and now I begin to recognise how awful the fatty foods actually make me feel and effect my body.

Its hard to say what your motivation is - but mine is just to feel better in my own skin.
Keep at it xxxx

bekahlou75

I can't remind you of why you're here without knowing why you're here. If you're happy at your size then stay there. Are you exercising? Are you healthy in regards to blood sugar, cholesterol, and blood pressure? If you want to stay where you are then use this site to log your food so that you can stay happy with where you are.

sarahi2009

I would say you are the only one that can answer that question. No matter how much I encourage or try to motivate you, it must come from you. If you are happy where you are and feel content there is not amount of words I can say to make you want to do something.

I feel that way sometimes too, I don't want to get up an exercise especially after I see the work out I am about to do, but then I remind myself what I want to be in a year. We are taking a trip to Disney and I want to be able to wear a bikini with out being unconscious of how I look. I want to be toned and well defined in my arms and legs and eventually get to my abs. I guess what I am saying is, get some goals and write them down, little ones and you will get there!

happysherri

Your Health!

-your organs thank you
-your heart thanks you
-your loved ones thank you -for having you around longer
and....
YOU ARE WORTH IT!

Sounds like you may need to just shake things up a bit. - Put yourself in so many new things that you find something you enjoy!

cwolfman13

physical appearance and fitting into some arbitrary size, etc are all pretty piss poor motivators in the end. Ultimately, you need to have reasons beyond the superficial for being healthy and getting your fitness and nutrition on. For me, it is my health and well being and wanting to live past 60 and wanting to be around for my kids and watching them grow up, etc.

Two years ago I was heading down a path to disaster from a health perspective. I had some really bad blood work and was quickly making my way to full on metabolic syndrome just like my dad. I didn't want that and knew that I presumed I would be cutting my life pretty short if I didn't pull it together...I was right...my awesome dad just passed away Wednesday night at the ripe old age of 61 because he never bothered to really take care of himself or even try until it was too late and all of the damage was done. I'm just trying to outrun that ****....I could give a **** what arbitrary number shows up on the scale or what size pants I wear...I want to be healthy and fit and alive...

MsDaraElaina

Thanks I also needed a reminder and this helps!

ikeepstriving

Like many of our peers here said, none of us can "remind" you why you're here without knowing you and your initial reasons for starting this journey. However, what we can tell you is that losing weight--or striving to be more healthy and conscious of how you treat your body--is ALWAYS a positive thing. And doing something that is great for your temple HAS to resonate deep down inside you. Knowing you are improving your health should be motivation enough for anyone. Our health is our most precious physical gift...perhaps you should meditate to capture your most precious emotional/spiritual gifts--self-love, high self-esteem, and thankfulness. Perhaps then...you will re-discover why you are really here. Head up, eyes forward!

TavistockToad

I'm having a lapse in motivation. I am realizing that I really don't know why I'm trying to do this. I'm fairly content at size 16--most of the time. I love my husband and he loves me. I'm average fitness. I don't look better as I lose weight due to genetically bad skin (thanks mom and dad). I was a size 22 in high school, and my skin's never recovered from that. As a result of that, I tend to look worse as I lose weight, and I have a jiggle when I move(what plastic surgeons call a delay) that no amount of exercise is ever going to fix. It's tough to keep working at it. I need some reminders of what I'm trying to do here please? :ohwell:

you tell us... what are you doing here?

MamaDubbs65

I lost my dad last month. He was obese, morbidly obese and had many medical issues as a result. I do this because he was concerned about my health. I want to honor my dad by honoring his last wish for me. That's what motivates me. Be healthy my friend and keep at it.

LuLuChick78

I agree with all of the above.

I would also like to ask what exactly you do for exercise that causes you to think you look worse as you lose weight? If you are only doing cardio then I can see that potentially happening to some people. However, some resistance or weight training helps firm things up as you lose. That's just what I was thinking when I read your post.

You sound pretty unmotivated if you are content where you are at. I like to push myself and see how far I can go. If someone lacks that drive then it seems pretty difficult. You need to set some goals and light that fire in yourself. No it isn't easy but it WILL be worth it.

april1445

physical appearance and fitting into some arbitrary size, etc are all pretty piss poor motivators in the end. Ultimately, you need to have reasons beyond the superficial for being healthy and getting your fitness and nutrition on. For me, it is my health and well being and wanting to live past 60 and wanting to be around for my kids and watching them grow up, etc.

Two years ago I was heading down a path to disaster from a health perspective. I had some really bad blood work and was quickly making my way to full on metabolic syndrome just like my dad. I didn't want that and knew that I presumed I would be cutting my life pretty short if I didn't pull it together...I was right...my awesome dad just passed away Wednesday night at the ripe old age of 61 because he never bothered to really take care of himself or even try until it was too late and all of the damage was done. I'm just trying to outrun that ****....I could give a **** what arbitrary number shows up on the scale or what size pants I wear...I want to be healthy and fit and alive...

My condolences about your Dad. Good for you for breaking that cycle, and thanks for the reminder.

april1445

I lost my dad last month. He was obese, morbidly obese and had many medical issues as a result. I do this because he was concerned about my health. I want to honor my dad by honoring his last wish for me. That's what motivates me. Be healthy my friend and keep at it.

My condolences to you on your dad too. You are the second respondee with this motivation--very good reminder.

april1445

Thank you all for your wisdom and support. Of course you're all right. I LOVE my workouts--they are my favorite time of day. Better fitness has kept me motivated thus far--I just want to keep improving, and ultimately shrink just a bit. That's what has been hard for me--just that next step.

Lizzy622

I can only tell you why I am here and although I do like to fit in smaller clothes my main reasons are health. By watching my diet and exercise, I have been taken off some drugs and avoided taking others. I can keep up with the kids a bit better although my son can't wait for me to be able to go on an 8 mile run with him. (maybe next year) I also have a bit more spring in my step and my back doesn't hurt anymore.

elyelyse

I'm having a lapse in motivation. I am realizing that I really don't know why I'm trying to do this. I'm fairly content at size 16--most of the time. I love my husband and he loves me. I'm average fitness. I don't look better as I lose weight due to genetically bad skin (thanks mom and dad). I was a size 22 in high school, and my skin's never recovered from that. As a result of that, I tend to look worse as I lose weight, and I have a jiggle when I move(what plastic surgeons call a delay) that no amount of exercise is ever going to fix. It's tough to keep working at it. I need some reminders of what I'm trying to do here please? :ohwell:

Maybe your health and mobility don't suffer at your current weight, so those don't feel like motivators to you now, but as the years go by, it will get harder to maintain your health at that size. In fact, it will likely be harder to maintain that size as well, as our metabolism does slow with age. Your best defense against having weight related issues later is to deal with it now. Two years ago, I had difficulty putting on and tying my shoes if I wasn't sitting down. Walking even a quarter mile was a struggle. I would get out of breath just bringing in the groceries from the car. I refused to live like that any more, or subject future-me to that kind of life.

as for loose skin and vanity...i have VERY loose skin and a hanging belly (and thighs) that will jiggle until the time comes when/if I can have surgery, and I've still got at least 30-40 pounds to go and no plans on giving up. I don't have a husband/boyfriend who already loves me for who I am, and sometimes I get self-conscious getting naked in front of someone new...but in my most recent naked adventure...the guy had his hand on my belly and said "it's obvious you've been working hard, I'm proud of you." He actually grabbed my belly when he said it, and I didn't feel the least bit unattractive. He was proud of my loose belly because it was a sign of my strength and dedication to myself...a different kind of beauty. A tall, attractive, funny, strong, smart guy, who runs his own business, owns his own home, a "good catch" you could say...found beauty in that jiggly belly. and that's what I am going to remind myself when i see myself naked in the mirror.

Don't let your jiggle stop you from seeing the whole picture.

SisterhoodoftheShrinkingPants

Wow, I SO relate to this post. My skin is a nightmare thanks to two very large pregnancies and letting myself hit almost 300lbs. Yea, its pretty ugly! I feel like as long as Im fully clothed it will all be ok, lol. But here's the thing. I still have 20-40 lbs to lose, (Ive lost 80 since Fall 2012) So I keep going to finish what I started. I keep going because excess fat weighs me down not just phsyically but EMOTIONALLY. I keep going because dammit, I want to look fabulous, even if it IS only IN clothes lol. And you know what else Ive realized???How can I judge an unfinished product??? Ive seen women get trim and STRONG and they might have some stretchmarks or even some sagging skin but you kinda dont care cause they have muscles and you can SEE them. Ive never had muscles, Ive never even been able to do a pull up. THATS what Im after now. Strength. Overcoming my fears. My Doubts. You should keep going because you WANT TO!!! You know you do, thats why you said something. Youre just scared it wont look the way you secretly hope it does when you get to your goal. Maybe it wont...but you will have done so much more than gotten into a dress size..if you can master your fears! xo

SisterhoodoftheShrinkingPants

I'm having a lapse in motivation. I am realizing that I really don't know why I'm trying to do this. I'm fairly content at size 16--most of the time. I love my husband and he loves me. I'm average fitness. I don't look better as I lose weight due to genetically bad skin (thanks mom and dad). I was a size 22 in high school, and my skin's never recovered from that. As a result of that, I tend to look worse as I lose weight, and I have a jiggle when I move(what plastic surgeons call a delay) that no amount of exercise is ever going to fix. It's tough to keep working at it. I need some reminders of what I'm trying to do here please? :ohwell:

Maybe your health and mobility don't suffer at your current weight, so those don't feel like motivators to you now, but as the years go by, it will get harder to maintain your health at that size. In fact, it will likely be harder to maintain that size as well, as our metabolism does slow with age. Your best defense against having weight related issues later is to deal with it now. Two years ago, I had difficulty putting on and tying my shoes if I wasn't sitting down. Walking even a quarter mile was a struggle. I would get out of breath just bringing in the groceries from the car. I refused to live like that any more, or subject future-me to that kind of life.

as for loose skin and vanity...i have VERY loose skin and a hanging belly (and thighs) that will jiggle until the time comes when/if I can have surgery, and I've still got at least 30-40 pounds to go and no plans on giving up. I don't have a husband/boyfriend who already loves me for who I am, and sometimes I get self-conscious getting naked in front of someone new...but in my most recent naked adventure...the guy had his hand on my belly and said "it's obvious you've been working hard, I'm proud of you." He actually grabbed my belly when he said it, and I didn't feel the least bit unattractive. He was proud of my loose belly because it was a sign of my strength and dedication to myself...a different kind of beauty. A tall, attractive, funny, strong, smart guy, who runs his own business, owns his own home, a "good catch" you could say...found beauty in that jiggly belly. and that's what I am going to remind myself when i see myself naked in the mirror.

Don't let your jiggle stop you from seeing the whole picture.

Can I just say I love you???

acogg

Because when you are overweight, fat runs out of new places to store on your skin layer and starts to build on your heart, kidney, liver, etc. Your joints are under more stress, making it likely that you will need a walker earlier than a thinner person. And pain and weakness from all these areas will set in sooner, making your life a painful, never-ending circus with doctor appointments. The first thing each appointment will tell you is to lose weight. If you quit now and accept fatness, you will likely accept a lower standard of fitness for the rest of your life. Sorry to be so blunt, but I have thought about this at length. Your post is like my bad demon talking. Oh, and that's another thing, as you get stronger and fitter, your bad demon will get smaller, your good angel will get bigger.

april1445

I want to print this whole answer off (all of you) and pin it to my fridge--over the Christmas sweets! Thank you all.

LiveLoveLift67

What you are trying to do here is be healthy! What you are trying to do here is be in better shape! It is not about being a size 16. I dont know your height or weight . It is about feeling better inside and out every day. Being able to have the mobility that you may lack at a bigger size. It is about the endorphins that you release when you are motivated to take care of yourself.

I dont think you should ever let yourself be content....that is a way to get right back to a size 22 again. Challenge yourself to be better even in some small way every day.

Ask yourself if you are doing this to feel better or look better. yes that jiggly skin may never go away . But, let me tell you from experience that when i started i was a tight size 20. I still have jiggle in places ( belly especially) but i am now a fit and healthy size 6. Working out will help you tone those areas up somewhat so that the jiggle is less noticable.

Dont give up or settle for where you are. Strive to be better and push yourself every day. Anyone can lose weight.... not every one can do it and be fit and healthy as well. There is a difference.