How Many of You Have Been Told You Were Obsessive?

sassyjae21

:explode: So I'm soooooo crabby right now. Talking on the phone with my sister this morning and I was griping about how hard I had been working all week and that I had actually put on two pounds. At which point she responds "You are starting to get obsessed, and honestly, it's a little scary".

OK so here's what I have a problem with. I don't go around yakking to people (besides my friends here) about weight loss. I talk to her about it every so often because she is my sister, and she struggles with weight.

At 5'4 and 134lbs (i've lost 4lbs so far), I get that people don't think I need to lose weight, but I would like to firm and tone and drop about 5lbs. What's wrong with that? The only thing I have done differently is change my diet and I have been working out.I still go out and have a good time, I go out to eat when i'm asked, I don't talk to people about what they're eating because I know this is MY journey, not theirs. I keep most of this to myself. I say something to her about it because I figured she wouldn't get all "your behavior is scary" on me.

I had to ask her, what if I were in school trying to make straight A's and I studied SO hard and worked my butt off, and I didn't. If that made me upset, would that still make me obsessive? If I was obsessive, I would be doing this the wrong way and probably develop an eating disorder. But i'm doing this the right way- watching what goes in my mouth and working out to get toned and strong.

I am so cranky. Has anyone ever been told this? Am I totally and completely wrong? It makes me scared to open up to even family members on the rare occasions that I do..:grumble:

grimendale

I think a lot of us have heard some variation on that at some point, and it often comes from someone who is also struggling with their weight. It could be a defense mechanism to help her justify to herself why she doesn't want to put in the work you are to lose weight. If you're "obsessive", then she's actually the smart one and not doing anything is the safer choice. Try not to let it get to you. If she's not going to be realistic, then maybe find someone else to vent to when you're struggling.

melissaka7

People don't say it directly to my face, but I know my coworkers don't understand, think it's stupid. They no longer ask if I want to order food with them, etc.

My family is proud of me, but it's my coworkers and friends that don't understand.

ZealousMissJJ

*Raises hand*

Yep, the first few months my friends really discouraged me. Called me obsessed, told me I should spend less time in the gym, have a waffle with whipped cream and told me I didn't look good when I started losing weight.

1,5 year later (with ups and downs) they ask me for advice.

Just keep going. Watch that you don't overdo talking about it with others, because no one likes to be reminded that they might be making bad choices and will (maybe subconsciously) discourage you. Keep going strong but keep it to yourself a bit. Once the results come (and they will) they'll start asking you how you do it.

Aparz1

Obsessed is the work the lazy use to describe the dedicated lamo.... I'm told I'm obssessed all the time but usually from girls that like to workout 2 days a week or less and eat whatever so I try not to worry about their thoughts on food and fitness.

dsimmons107

I have heard this several times. I just say it is not obsessed, it is called dedicated and focused. That's why I am successful.

emilyisbonkers

i get this all the time.. so what i wanna weigh my cheese? its not a crime

bcf7683

Many people don't understand what it takes if they've never made the same change in their life. I gave up on trying to explain my eating habits to co-workers, that's a hopeless battle. My boyfriend used to think I was nutty, but after 2 and 1/2 years, he's used to it. He's actually cleaned up his eating habits a little along the way. My mom... well, she KIND of gets it. She asks a lot of questions about my eating habits and workout routines, so I can tell she's trying to learn a little for herself.

But to the people who think I'm nuts or obsessive, let 'em think that- a lot of times it's masking jealousy/envy anyways.

minimalistmom

My husband will tell you I am obsessive. When it comes to my sister, she asks me how I do it, and when I explain to her what I have been doing, she turn off their ears and doesn't listen. So I quit talking to her about it. And when I am cranky, I make sure I eat so I'm not, even if it means going over, because when I'm cranky, watch out!

karllundy

Yes! Sometimes directly, sometimes not. Even my wife has said it a few times when I record everything I eat. I think she is just jealous of my success!

firstsip

Wrong? About what, that it's okay to be obsessive, or that you are obsessive?

Anyone who "freaks out" about minor slip-ups is probably obsessive. Getting one A- and crying about it? Yeah... that'd be obsessive, too.

To err is human. To be unwilling to err even slightly, be it intentional or not, sounds...

toscarthearmada

My family is the same way. My entire family struggles with weight too and this is how I think about it:

Weight loss and exercise is a foreign concept to them. They have never been around someone who values their health. So when they hear someone talk about it, just in regular conversation, it's an obsession. ALSO I realize that a lot of people that want to rain on my parade have never had anything they've been proud of, like losing 100 pounds.

I wouldn't read anything into it. Continue doing what you're doing because you are the only one that knows your body/health/mind.

Congrats on your weight loss!

andreapoole

I've found that when people say things like that, it is usually more about them than it is about you. The changes you are making might feel scary to her because they cause her to think about things that maybe she needs to change. She also might be worried that you are changing into a different person, and she is losing her sister. Try to be patient with her. She probably does respect you and even look up to you. In time she will see that you are still you and may even join you in your journey.

Holly_Roman_Empire

I used to, so now I just don't talk about it that much, except on here with my friends. Most of the time now people think I'm a freak of nature since they see me eating fast food and LOSING weight. Usually I get remarks like, "I wish I had good genes like you..." Well, they don't know what I eat throughout the whole day, and they don't know about the exercise I do at home. Just stop talking about it to people that don't get it.

Fern890

I have gone from a UK size 14 to a UK size 10 since last January, have a healthy BMI and feel better than I have in a long time yet all my family say they are concerned etc, and the one that annoys me the most and comes from my mum is that I should just accept my 'real body shape' that I am a curvy girl and that 'it isn't natural' for me to be slim and that I won't be able to stay like this.

I used to think that was right now I see it is these people that are miseducated about nutrition and fitness and that they have no clue what they're talking about. I hate that they feel they can comment on my weight loss and eating right, my enjoyment of the gym but did they comment when I would sit and eat a whole packet of biscuits?, or second helpings of a roast dinner? It's normally other people's issues. As long as you know you're being healthy, I think you need to accept that it's other people's issues and the way that they cope with the negative feelings your motivation and successes can cause them to have about themselves rather than take it personally

Davila14

It depends on the people in question. For some they don't know food and socializing have blurred their boundaries. For those enjoying people's company, it becomes more about the gathering than the food. It sounds a bit like a fortune cookie, but it may help dealing with all the friends and co-workers wanting to go out to eat and socialize.

sassyjae21

Wrong? About what, that it's okay to be obsessive, or that you are obsessive?

Anyone who "freaks out" about minor slip-ups is probably obsessive. Getting one A- and crying about it? Yeah... that'd be obsessive, too.

To err is human. To be unwilling to err even slightly, be it intentional or not, sounds...

At what point did I say I freaked out about it? I grumbled about it. TBH, I did not have any slip ups. My weight is probably due to water and whatever else; I just hate the stupid fluctuations. I appreciate your comments but no.

To everyone else, yea, I understand what you all are saying. I haven't changed, I'm my same goofy self. But I guess that I'm just going to have to shut up about it completely if that makes her feel better about herself and keeps her mind at ease. And I'm ok with that. I have a whole community hear that is willing to listen :flowerforyou:

firstsip

Wrong? About what, that it's okay to be obsessive, or that you are obsessive?

Anyone who "freaks out" about minor slip-ups is probably obsessive. Getting one A- and crying about it? Yeah... that'd be obsessive, too.

To err is human. To be unwilling to err even slightly, be it intentional or not, sounds...

At what point did I say I freaked out about it? I grumbled about it. TBH, I did not have any slip ups. My weight is probably due to water and whatever else.

To everyone else, yea, I understand what you all are saying. I haven't changed, I'm my same goofy self. But I guess that I'm just going to have to shut up about it completely if that makes her feel better about herself and keeps her mind at ease. And I'm ok with that. I have a whole community hear that is willing to listen :flowerforyou:

Are general questions posted to the forum meant to be taken personally? I didn't say "you" did any of that?

A bit... obsessive in analyzing my response, are we? (I'M KIDDING).

sassyjae21

Wrong? About what, that it's okay to be obsessive, or that you are obsessive?

Anyone who "freaks out" about minor slip-ups is probably obsessive. Getting one A- and crying about it? Yeah... that'd be obsessive, too.

To err is human. To be unwilling to err even slightly, be it intentional or not, sounds...

At what point did I say I freaked out about it? I grumbled about it. TBH, I did not have any slip ups. My weight is probably due to water and whatever else.

To everyone else, yea, I understand what you all are saying. I haven't changed, I'm my same goofy self. But I guess that I'm just going to have to shut up about it completely if that makes her feel better about herself and keeps her mind at ease. And I'm ok with that. I have a whole community hear that is willing to listen :flowerforyou:

Are general questions posted to the forum meant to be taken personally? I didn't say "you" did any of that?

A bit... obsessive in analyzing my response, are we? (I'M KIDDING).

You're playing words games. I would assume that since you were responding to a post I created talking about ME, that you were talking to/about me. But that's cute though :flowerforyou:

firstsip

Wrong? About what, that it's okay to be obsessive, or that you are obsessive?

Anyone who "freaks out" about minor slip-ups is probably obsessive. Getting one A- and crying about it? Yeah... that'd be obsessive, too.

To err is human. To be unwilling to err even slightly, be it intentional or not, sounds...

At what point did I say I freaked out about it? I grumbled about it. TBH, I did not have any slip ups. My weight is probably due to water and whatever else.

To everyone else, yea, I understand what you all are saying. I haven't changed, I'm my same goofy self. But I guess that I'm just going to have to shut up about it completely if that makes her feel better about herself and keeps her mind at ease. And I'm ok with that. I have a whole community hear that is willing to listen :flowerforyou:

Are general questions posted to the forum meant to be taken personally? I didn't say "you" did any of that?

A bit... obsessive in analyzing my response, are we? (I'M KIDDING).

You're playing words games. I would assume that since you were responding to a post I created talking about ME, that you were talking to/about me. But that's cute though :flowerforyou:

I'm sorry Ms. Jackson. I didn't mean to to make your daughter cry.

BlueBombers

My husband tells me sometimes that I'm obsessed when it comes to not missing my workouts especially now since I'm almost at my goal weight. He says it as a joke but I tell him would you rather me be heavier again?

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chelsiem87

It's always discouraging and irritating when someone makes defensive comments like that, especially when it's family. I have no problem with "thin" people Loosing/toning their weight. I actually work with a woman that is VERY healthy, overall. But she KEEPS her body looking good and is concientous about living a healthy lifestyle. That's what this is all about leading and living a healthy lifestyle, right? You're doing good, girl! Just come here to vent and you can FR me if you want. I'm always looking for new friends to motivate and encourage :bigsmile:

Rachlovesfitness

well since I clinically have OCD all the time lol

sassyjae21

Wrong? About what, that it's okay to be obsessive, or that you are obsessive?

Anyone who "freaks out" about minor slip-ups is probably obsessive. Getting one A- and crying about it? Yeah... that'd be obsessive, too.

To err is human. To be unwilling to err even slightly, be it intentional or not, sounds...

At what point did I say I freaked out about it? I grumbled about it. TBH, I did not have any slip ups. My weight is probably due to water and whatever else.

To everyone else, yea, I understand what you all are saying. I haven't changed, I'm my same goofy self. But I guess that I'm just going to have to shut up about it completely if that makes her feel better about herself and keeps her mind at ease. And I'm ok with that. I have a whole community hear that is willing to listen :flowerforyou:

Are general questions posted to the forum meant to be taken personally? I didn't say "you" did any of that?

A bit... obsessive in analyzing my response, are we? (I'M KIDDING).

You're playing words games. I would assume that since you were responding to a post I created talking about ME, that you were talking to/about me. But that's cute though :flowerforyou:

I'm sorry Ms. Jackson. I didn't mean to to make your daughter cry.

I apologize a trillion times.:drinker:

And yea seriously, that is annoying. Trying to do this the right way! But I agree, I had to dive head first into this, otherwise, I just wouldn't do it at all. And i've had enough of that lol

98777

Ask them why they are so obsessive about ruining their health and being overweight.

tristaj90

I lost about 96 pounds in a year and now that i'm 5'4" and 138 pounds, my mom keeps telling me that my goal to lose another about 10 pounds is crazy and I should just be happy where I am. She's also 5'4" and she's been plateau'd at a 156-158 weight for years.. I was at 234 pounds at my heaviest.. I know for my height I should be a little less than where I am. Right now I'm mostly trying to build some muscle and tone/definition... She just scoffs and rolls her eyes. Its discouraging most of the time..

emilyisbonkers

Ask them why they are so obsessive about ruining their health and being overweight.

BOOM

april1445

I get this, it feels like from everyone. My husband is very cerebral, and I think he finds this shallow. My older sister is 150 lbs overweight and gives me tons of grief (I guess everyone needs a hobby...). I want to tell them all to f off if you want the truth. Tired of trying to explain it...

fat2strongbeth

Yes, I have been told that I'm being obsessive. It's often from the same people who ask me my secret and then don't like the answer when I say hard work.

1PatientBear

:explode: So I'm soooooo crabby right now. Talking on the phone with my sister this morning and I was griping about how hard I had been working all week and that I had actually put on two pounds. At which point she responds "You are starting to get obsessed, and honestly, it's a little scary".

OK so here's what I have a problem with. I don't go around yakking to people (besides my friends here) about weight loss. I talk to her about it every so often because she is my sister, and she struggles with weight.

At 5'4 and 134lbs (i've lost 4lbs so far), I get that people don't think I need to lose weight, but I would like to firm and tone and drop about 5lbs. What's wrong with that? The only thing I have done differently is change my diet and I have been working out.I still go out and have a good time, I go out to eat when i'm asked, I don't talk to people about what they're eating because I know this is MY journey, not theirs. I keep most of this to myself. I say something to her about it because I figured she wouldn't get all "your behavior is scary" on me.

I had to ask her, what if I were in school trying to make straight A's and I studied SO hard and worked my butt off, and I didn't. If that made me upset, would that still make me obsessive? If I was obsessive, I would be doing this the wrong way and probably develop an eating disorder. But i'm doing this the right way- watching what goes in my mouth and working out to get toned and strong.

I am so cranky. Has anyone ever been told this? Am I totally and completely wrong? It makes me scared to open up to even family members on the rare occasions that I do..:grumble:

TL; DR.

Who cares? It's your body and health. Do what makes you happy.