Dating during weight loss?

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marilougaron
marilougaron Posts: 2
in Getting Started
Hello, friends. I'm a 40-year old newcomer from Montreal. I'm aiming for a 40 pound weight loss. Although I started exercising regularly in September and also weighed myslef then for the first time in 5 years (!), my weight loss over the last 4 months have been very slow (10 pounds in all). I saw today a picture of myself taken Wednesday evening, and I sadly found it quite depressing... Which brings me to the topic of dating!

I've been single for 5 years and I'm hoping to enter a long-term relationship but I'm not sure if I should postpone dating... I really don't find the woman I saw in my pictures attractive... At the same time, dating and being around men can be positive and stimulating and I'm afraid that isolating mhyself during my weight loss journey will do more harm than good.

I wonder if it's possible at all to meet someone when you really aren't happy with yourself.... Any thoughts?

Many thanks in advance!
Marilou

Replies

  • alisonlynn1976
    alisonlynn1976 Posts: 929 Member
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    I think that you should wait until you like yourself, but I don't think that necessarily has to do with weight. Some people have improved self-esteem after they lose weight, and others have the same emotional issues at any weight. The key is addressing the emotional issues directly.
  • vbriaz
    vbriaz Posts: 1 Member
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    You have done very well considering that I have only lost 2 kg in 2 months. There is a reason for this in my opinion. Watch this video from Fitness Blender
    http://youtu.be/1RL5xHVMYoE
    I am not advicing on dating. Not an expert. Just came across you having similar problem to mine in the posts.
  • pyrowill
    pyrowill Posts: 1,163 Member
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    Someone finding you attractive when you don't is certainly possible. Otherwise I'd have probably never had any previous girlfriends. Although being with someone who wholly is unhappy with them self is not an attractive quality.

    You could wait until you are happy before being with someone, but you might find being with the right person might make you even happier and see yourself in a new light. The added support could bring out a new you.
  • amcsouth
    amcsouth Posts: 283 Member
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    I've been single my entire life because I didn't like what I saw in the mirror. I think it's a good idea to surround yourself with men but I personally won't enter into a relationship until I like what I see. I feel it's not fair on him having to make me feel good about myself all the time. This is just my opinion though :smile:

    10 pounds in 4 months is great! Slow and steady is the best way :)
  • Dgydad
    Dgydad Posts: 104 Member
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    Please, please don't go down this road! Don't take the vision or opinion you have formed of yourself and project it onto someone else. If you desire to ultimately settle into a long-term relationship, you have to have relationships, no? So just take it as it comes, luv. Your physique is a only part of the total package that is you. Consider the possibility of counselling on this issue; it may help. Just don't put the rest of your life and identity on hold; the time lost can't be recovered. You see enough value in yourself that you continue to strive to achieve positive change; is it really that hard to believe someone else can see that same value? I don't think so....

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