Thinking about just giving up

2

Replies

  • Mother_Superior
    Mother_Superior Posts: 1,624 Member
    Respectfully, despite everything that may or may not have hindered your success, nothing will stop it more quickly than giving up. Time, education, persistence...those three things are how we get where we're going.

    h92678C98
  • eldamiano
    eldamiano Posts: 2,667 Member
    It is not demeaning. So many people who are overweight spend most of their time 'trying so hard without results'. So unfair!

    This concept doesnt exist. It is up to the person to be tough with their own selves without bemoaning so-called external factors which prevent them from losing weight. No excuses.

    Really? So what would you say to me? I've lost 116 pounds so far and am stuck with my weight loss. I've posted to ask for suggestions also. I work out regularly, I strength train, I count every calorie I eat yet, like the OP, the weight loss has stalled for a while.

    Would you be demeaning and tell me I'm not doing enough or haven't done enough?

    My point is that you don't inhabit our bodies nor do you have the same genetic make up. What worked for you may not work for the OP. So, instead of being critical and hasty in that criticism, try and actually understand what's going on from THE INDIVIDUAL'S perspective, not yours.

    Oh yes. Metabolism. Genetics. The classic excuses. 'My friend eats rubbish all day and is still slim but here is poor old me'.

    If you had stopped before your last paragraph, then you would have hit the nail on the head. You lost all that weight through doing the maths, exercising, etc, while the OP hasnt. Or does his/her genetics vary to the extent that one person can lose 116lb whereas somebody else cant by playing the same game?

    Heard it all before.
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    It is not demeaning. So many people who are overweight spend most of their time 'trying so hard without results'. So unfair!

    This concept doesnt exist. It is up to the person to be tough with their own selves without bemoaning so-called external factors which prevent them from losing weight. No excuses.

    Really? So what would you say to me? I've lost 116 pounds so far and am stuck with my weight loss. I've posted to ask for suggestions also. I work out regularly, I strength train, I count every calorie I eat yet, like the OP, the weight loss has stalled for a while.

    Would you be demeaning and tell me I'm not doing enough or haven't done enough?

    My point is that you don't inhabit our bodies nor do you have the same genetic make up. What worked for you may not work for the OP. So, instead of being critical and hasty in that criticism, try and actually understand what's going on from THE INDIVIDUAL'S perspective, not yours.

    Did THE INDIVIDUAL that created this thread ask you to hijack it with this unnecessary white knighting?
  • focuseddiva
    focuseddiva Posts: 174 Member
    Ok, ok -- I'm NOT giving up. :-) Thank you for the kick in the butt about that, even to the one poster who was fairly harsh. Am I drinking water? Yes. I do cop to using crystal light sometimes. Does my JC food have sodium? YES. But, from 2007-2008, when I was on JC food exclusively and following their meal plan, I lost weight. And the food had sodium then, too. So, I don't know how to reconcile that one. Am I adding quick add calories? Yes. I actually usually overestimate those. Example: I might have a bite of my kid's mac-n-cheese, along with a bite of something else. I'm talking bites. So I'll throw in a quick add 100 cals to cover it. Have I had days where I overate? Yes. Should it have negated the prior 5 days of sticking to a calorie budget? I don't think so. But maybe, for me, it will.

    All I can tell you is that being female, being up and down in weight your whole life, being thin, being obese and all shades in between, and being int hat lovely perimenopausal stage throws science out the window. I mean it. Unless you are male or genetically blessed, you understand what I mean.

    Here's to a new week (again). Here's to getting my period and hoping the bloat/water weight resolves. And here's to posters on here who are kind, supportive, and understanding. :-)
  • Ok, ok -- I'm NOT giving up. :-) Thank you for the kick in the butt about that, even to the one poster who was fairly harsh. Am I drinking water? Yes. I do cop to using crystal light sometimes. Does my JC food have sodium? YES. But, from 2007-2008, when I was on JC food exclusively and following their meal plan, I lost weight. And the food had sodium then, too. So, I don't know how to reconcile that one. Am I adding quick add calories? Yes. I actually usually overestimate those. Example: I might have a bite of my kid's mac-n-cheese, along with a bite of something else. I'm talking bites. So I'll throw in a quick add 100 cals to cover it. Have I had days where I overate? Yes. Should it have negated the prior 5 days of sticking to a calorie budget? I don't think so. But maybe, for me, it will.

    All I can tell you is that being female, being up and down in weight your whole life, being thin, being obese and all shades in between, and being int hat lovely perimenopausal stage throws science out the window. I mean it. Unless you are male or genetically blessed, you understand what I mean.

    Here's to a new week (again). Here's to getting my period and hoping the bloat/water weight resolves. And here's to posters on here who are kind, supportive, and understanding. :-)

    You haven't mentioned anything about your exercise routine.
  • velrist
    velrist Posts: 6 Member
    It sounds like your pre-menstrual time is kicking your behind this month. Hang in there. I don't know anything about Jenny Craig but if you eat less calories than you burn you will lose weight. My weight fluctuates by as much as 5 lbs over the course of a week but I only have it count on 1 day a week and those TOM days are going to be screwy including how you feel about everything.

    Good luck!
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    Ok, ok -- I'm NOT giving up. :-) Thank you for the kick in the butt about that, even to the one poster who was fairly harsh. Am I drinking water? Yes. I do cop to using crystal light sometimes. Does my JC food have sodium? YES. But, from 2007-2008, when I was on JC food exclusively and following their meal plan, I lost weight. And the food had sodium then, too. So, I don't know how to reconcile that one. Am I adding quick add calories? Yes. I actually usually overestimate those. Example: I might have a bite of my kid's mac-n-cheese, along with a bite of something else. I'm talking bites. So I'll throw in a quick add 100 cals to cover it. Have I had days where I overate? Yes. Should it have negated the prior 5 days of sticking to a calorie budget? I don't think so. But maybe, for me, it will.

    All I can tell you is that being female, being up and down in weight your whole life, being thin, being obese and all shades in between, and being int hat lovely perimenopausal stage throws science out the window. I mean it. Unless you are male or genetically blessed, you understand what I mean.

    Here's to a new week (again). Here's to getting my period and hoping the bloat/water weight resolves. And here's to posters on here who are kind, supportive, and understanding. :-)

    Generally speaking, when someone says that something used to work for them in the past but doesn't anymore, NEAT is the variable, not "metabolism slowing down with age". Increase your activity
  • djxil
    djxil Posts: 357
    I started on November 24th and have seen positive results, here's what I did and continue to do. Not saying it will work for you but please hang in there.

    Stopped eating Fast Food
    Stopped Drinking Soda and Energy Drinks
    Stopped eating processed foods
    Stopped eating Candy

    Had a headache for about 10 days as a result...

    Started drinking lots of water
    Starting eating fruits and veges
    Started taking One-a-Day's, Potassium and Iron
    Logged Diary everyday
    Weigh-in and measurements once a week, only once a week, same day, same time
    Started making foods from scratch
    Started exercising more each week

    Again, hang in there.
  • laserturkey
    laserturkey Posts: 1,680 Member
    Here are my suggestions:

    You should really nail down accurate logging for a few weeks. Absolutely buy a food scale and use it on EVERYTHING. If you have a "bite" of something, weigh it before you eat it and figure out calories based on the weight of the whole dish. If that's too much bother, then don't eat it! Have something else that you can weigh and log accurately. You deserve good health and you deserve the peace of mind that comes from knowing you are on top of things and doing your best. Once you have done this for a few weeks, you may be able to "estimate" things here and there and still come out alright. But for now, clean up the accuracy of your logs as much as possible.

    Log sodium, if you aren't already. Try to keep your sodium under 2500 generally, and if you've gone over, then don't weigh the next day, or expect to see water weight and don't let it bother you.

    Make sure you are getting adequate protein and fats.

    Don't undereat. Eat to your goal every day.

    After several weeks of this, you *should* be on track. If not, you'll have more solid data from which to make adjustments.
  • servilia
    servilia Posts: 3,452 Member
    What kind of veggies are you eating in unlimited amounts? Are they greens, or are they starchy like potatoes, squash, etc. I would suggest you measure them too.
  • gsc560
    gsc560 Posts: 11
    Don't give up dear. You should be giving yourself credit for paying attention to your health and the dedicated effort you put in so far. Be confident that in the long run, you will be successful. You may have to change some strategies and techniques (and I've read some good suggestions from other replies here), but its ok to make changes and adjustments - that's not failure.
  • MelissaPhippsFeagins
    MelissaPhippsFeagins Posts: 8,063 Member
    Don't give up. Thomas Edison failed at the incandescent light bulb the first 1000 ideas. He died rich because he didn't stop trying. He also didn't try the first 1000 ideas again. Therefore, if what you have done for a month isn't working, try something else. You've gotten lots of good ideas from other posters. I wouldn't throw away JC meals you've already paid for, but I would eat at least one fresh meal a day until they are gone and I would drink one 8oz glass of water for every 800mg of sodium in the JC meals. You have to wash that salt away or your body will retain it and you won't lose the weight.

    I also have a goal of 1500 calories/day and I practice what I am preaching. I've already had 2 15oz glasses of water today. That's what my travel cup holds. I have had egg whites w/cheese on toast for breakfast and two cups of coffee w/half and half for 420 mg of sodium. I upped my calories to 1500 a couple of weeks ago because I am close to my goal and will be upping it a few calories every couple of weeks to have a soft landing at maintenance. I lost a pound at 1500 two weeks ago and a half pound so far this week (way more sodium and processed sugar in my diet at Christmas time.) I measure my food with measuring cups; I would obsess if I had a food scale. You can do this; I know you can because I know I am. Good luck!
  • focuseddiva
    focuseddiva Posts: 174 Member
    Thanks.

    What is NEAT?

    As for veggies -- yes only non-starchy veggies: lettuce, raw spinach, steamed broccoli, tomatoes.

    As for exercise -- I'm at the gym 5 times a week. Usually no less than 30 minutes. More like 45-60 minutes. My go-to is a combo of running/walking, where I run @ 6.3 mph for 3 min, walk @ 4.3 mph for 2 min -- and do this for 45 min. Or, I might do brisk walking for a full hour. Or I'll do the elliptical or the Arc Trainer. In all cases, my heart rate is at least int he 130s, if not the 140s/150s for most of the time. I also see a personal trainer twice a week for an hour for strength.

    So -- I think I have the exercise thing down, although I'm going to add more lifting/strength and decrease cardio. I think after 15 years of cardio, my body is just used to it (when I was in the 140s, I ran 5ks and 10ks a lot).

    Diet: Yes, JC food is prepackaged and has sodium. But my body is used to the sodium. I didn't just start on JC food and retain a bunch of water. THe JC plan also factors in the macro aspect of things. It's not a bad meal plan, despite being prepackaged. I don't plan on being on it forever, but it is very convenient to just take it and go and know my calories are accounted for.

    I DO drink diet soda. I should start just doing water. I know this will help.
    I DO log things every day.
    I DO NOT have a food scale and don't need one now, b/c, as stated, I eat JC food. It's already in MFP's database.
    I'm getting adequate protein, and I'm not getting tons of carbs. It's fairly balanced.

    So, I'm going to do the following for the next week:
    • No eating after 7 pm
    • No 'nibbles' and no quick add cals
    • One less day of cardio and one extra day of lifting
    • More water
    • Weigh every day for now
    • Cross my fingers that menstrual stuff will subside, along with about 8 pounds of water

    Does this sound reasonable? It seems like it should help.
  • skinnyinnotime
    skinnyinnotime Posts: 4,078 Member
    A whole month eh?

    When you give up, what then...you'll be happy with your weight and body?

    Exactly.

    Stop being dramatic and instead focus on what you're doing.

    If you really were in a calorie deficit you would have lost some weight. You need to track your calorie intake properly!!

    "Just Do It" :flowerforyou:
  • amunro
    amunro Posts: 16 Member
    I know it's so hard when you don't see any progress! :( I haven't lost a pound in the past six months, and I've been so frustrated and so upset, so I know exactly how you feel.

    I'm hearing a lot of people say that the prepackaged foods you're eating are high in sodium. That may be one of the reasons your weight is fluctuating so much. Depending on how much sodium you're eating and how much water you're drinking, your weight will fluctuate a lot. Having a lot of sodium will cause the number on the scale to go up. So don't be discouraged!

    Also, you are weighing yourself too much! If you weigh yourself daily, your weight is going to fluctuate based on what you ate the day before, how much water you had, whether you took a poo before you weighed yourself, whether you ate, etc. I'd say try weighing yourself only once a week to track your progress, the same day each week, before you eat or drink anything in the morning.

    Don't give up! <3
  • cafeaulait7
    cafeaulait7 Posts: 2,459 Member
    I've never seen good results in the first month of trying to lose weight, not even as a teen. Dunno why, but it never ends up mattering because I do start to lose well in more weeks. I read once that you have to wait 8 weeks to see results from exercise, so I just figured the whole thing might take 8 weeks to get going. That ended up working really well for me (true or not), because my early results on the scale always suck.

    Consistency is key, as in many weeks. Do track your calories carefully and take a weekly average (I take a net and gross) to know what you are actually doing and how any overages affect the math, but you might be doing fine now and just need patience.
  • gabrielleelliott90
    gabrielleelliott90 Posts: 854 Member
    Don't give up, if anything is going to work it will be MFP. You have only been doing it a month. Your body is still adjusting to it. Did you weigh on an empty stomach and bladder with light clothing? This is the best way to weigh so keep trying that and only try to weigh a couple times a week at the most at the same time. Weight can fluctuate.

    Your time of the month is near, and it is easy to gain water weight from it. This will soon go. I can tell you that the weight you have gained can only be water weight. You haven't gone over your calories so there is no fat gain. It's just water which will go. Eat the amount of calories you are meant to each day do not restrict them, it is really dangerous to go under 1200, ideally have more than that a day. You don't need to exercise all the time either, it is the diet that gives you a weight loss and exercise doesn't really contribute to it- only with toning up, making your insides healthier and making you lose inches. Measure your body as well- you have probably lost inches.

    Keep going, something will give! You have our support!
  • gabrielleelliott90
    gabrielleelliott90 Posts: 854 Member
  • Sreneesa
    Sreneesa Posts: 1,170 Member
    I know I shouldn't. Everything in me says not to. But I am so frustrated and disappointed with my lack of progress. I started with MFP a month ago. I was about 175-180 lbs. I have been averaging a calorie deficit every week. I thought if I saw even a 2 pound drop in the first few weeks, it would motivate me even more. Instead, I saw not much of anything. Two weeks ago, I weighed in at 175. Yesterday, I was 179, despite this entire past week of eating an average of 1500 cals/day and lots of exercise. How can you possbly gain on that? Well, time of month is right about here, so I chalked it up to that. I ate 1300 cals yesterday. Exercised for 45 minutes. And weighed this morning, desperate to see any sort of drop or movement or anything. Instead, the scaled showed 185. How do I gain 6 pounds overnight???? It has to be water-related/time of month. I understand that. Still, it's so so hard to see the scale climb while you do what you perceive as everything right. And even if my diet isn't "clean" and "perfect" -- I should still be in a calorie deficit every week enough to produce a loss. And it's not happening. In my head, I have two routes I can go right now: 1) Restirct further to about 1000 cals/day to see if that works, and don't deviate -- and keep exercising moderately/add in more strenght and 2)Just give up. This is like smashing my head against the wall. I feel like throwing myself off a bridge, I am so frustrated.

    6lb difference overnight... Are you sure its not the scale? Are you weighing it in the same place?
  • tatiianag13
    tatiianag13 Posts: 76 Member
    Don't give up. Because what's the alternative? The alternative is way worse. I've given up before. We all have. And we just end up fatter!

    I personally wouldn't do Jenny Craig. But I accept that this is something you've chosen. And we've all got to start someplace. And Jenny craig is based on calorie counting. Its perfectly compatible with the logic of MFP. So there is nothing wrong with the plan. The sodium may make you retain water and it may F up your scales readings, but *sodium doesn't keep you from burning fat.* When I gain 4 lbs the day after high sodium chinese takeout, I am retaining water, not gaining fat.

    Honestly, if I were you, I'd go talk to the JC people. Some of us on here may poo poo JC, but you are paying them good money. And if I'm not mistaken, part of the money gives you access to a personal consultant. Talking to a human being might be really helpful.
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
    In my head, I have two routes I can go right now: 1) Restirct further to about 1000 cals/day to see if that works, and don't deviate -- and keep exercising moderately/add in more strenght and 2)Just give up.

    There is a third option - fix your logging.

    Because there is no way you are gaining weight if you are eating as little as you say.

    Find the problem, and correct it.

    EDIT: Walked through your diary. Lots of 2200+ days. Lots of what look like incomplete days. Lots of quick adds. This is all consistent with eaten more than claimed.
  • S0nsh1ne
    S0nsh1ne Posts: 218 Member
    Hi, I have not looked at your diary but are you logging your exercise? Are you then eating those calories back? Is sodium one of items you log and view every day? I found I began sustaining loses once I began paying attention to my sodium intake. Also eating fresher options rather then prepackaged really does make a big difference. Not saying you haven't done it before and can't do it again but what's the healthier alternative? Good luck.
  • 1exercisefreak
    1exercisefreak Posts: 75 Member
    Please don't give up! There is alot of people cheering for you.....I don't really concentrate on how far I go when I exercise but how many calories I burn....I burned 4,076 calories this week....with healthy eating and exercise you can lose this weight...I have been seeing alot of results from my workouts.You can friend me if you would like.:happy:
  • CynthiaT60
    CynthiaT60 Posts: 1,280 Member
    Adding to the cheers! I also agree with logging everything as precisely as possible (using a food scale etc.). It can give you clues about what you can do better.
    And remember: lots of people gain before they lose!
  • Ang108
    Ang108 Posts: 1,706 Member
    I am surprised at how little food you get for your calories on Jenny Craig. I eat 1200 calories of a wide variety of fairly natural , home cooked meals and get oodles more than you. That keeps me satiated and from needing cheat meals or days. Feel free to check my food diary...it's open.
  • gophertracts
    gophertracts Posts: 7 Member
    saw your diary. you need to start eating real food instead . I have a hard time also,but I think you would do better if you cooked for yourself and ate healthy food.
  • Mr_Starr
    Mr_Starr Posts: 139 Member
    "Adding to the cheers! I also agree with logging everything as precisely as possible (using a food scale etc.). It can give you clues about what you can do better."


    From personal experience.... don't cut out so many calories at once. For the first few months I started tracking, I didn't even start to purposely restrict my calories. I started exercising a little and started tracking my food as precisely as possible ( see what others have said about this).

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  • focuseddiva
    focuseddiva Posts: 174 Member
    Thank u for all the cheers and support. Truly. Yes I had a number of 2200 cal days, but net wise per week, I should have hada deficit. Ideally need to cut out the higher cal days and be consistent. I think this more than sodium or prepackaged meals will make a difference. I just met with my trainer. And she recommended no more than 100 carbs pet day. If being consistent at 1200 cals a day doesn't get things moving, I'm going to try the low carb. Can't hurt. Thanks again to all for the advice.
  • Just_Scott
    Just_Scott Posts: 1,766 Member
    You have only been logging for a month and have a ton of quick adds and some days that look incomplete.

    Weigh your food, log accurately and log everything. Wait a few weeks and see where you are - then reassess.

    ^^this^^ Just listen to her...it is pretty darn good advice.
  • nursy14
    nursy14 Posts: 32 Member
    don't give up im going through the same thing I cut down to 1100 a day and usually walk 3-7 miles a day but seldom lose it is so frustrating im depressed about it but cant give up it will only get worse so I will keep going I cut out bread and very limited sugar I east fast food maybe every 2-3 months I seldom fry anything so I know how you feel but plz don't give up patty