Am I headed towards Anorexia/Bulimia
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Budget wise and time wise, I can't go to a psychologist. I have a lot of work to do in university and my parents would be extremely upset to have to send me to some clinic. I thought I was fine, now everyone is making me believe that I'm sick (mentally). I asked this question because I was hoping someone would say that I'm not sick.
but if you're worried enough to ask...it could be that you are. Your university will probably offer psych support, at the very least. They won't send you to 'some clinic', inpatient is usually reserved for those who are physically ill from their disorder. Best of luck to you.
^ this. All tiers of treatment from inpatient to one every few weeks outpatient. Most large colleges and universities have accredited counseling center. Depending on you country/university, its sometimes even free because its rolled into student dues. Also many clinics and providers offer sliding scales. They just don't advertise. It's kind of n the doing good and giving back that is in the ethics of the profession. Call some places, you may be surprised. Or attending on of the eating community based groups. Those are usually free since you sound like your still hedging your bets. Your parents might be upset to send you to a clinic but I'd bet they would be more upset if you do serious damage to your body. Just a thought.0 -
You are actually feeling terrified and will not leave the house because you THINK you are fat over one pound????????????????
i am not being smart towards you or I do not mean to be disrespectful to you in any way,but you seriously need to see a professional counselor that deals with food disorders if you feel like this,because if you don't in 6 months you are going to be so so much in a very dark place that will take a long time to get out of. That is not healthy what so ever for you to think this way.
take care
Judy0 -
I have the same exact problem.
Yup, we're bulimic without the mess. It's been two years of me stressing and it hasn't stopped yet. I just try to cut the binging and keep my exercise up and I have less to worry about. 0 -
laadddiiieessss!! I was facing the same thing after having lost a good amount of weight. I got really good at losing weight and it felt really good to finally be skinny. I lost my period but had no idea because my birth control was "faking" me out and forcing a period. As soon as I got off my birth control, my period stopped and hasn't returned since, that was 13 months ago. I have since gotten back to a "normal" weight but went through all the fears you talk about.
Please listen when I say, the physical consequences are not worth it. I know the little voice in the back of your head is telling you you shouldn't eat too much, or that you HAVE to work out. But take steps everyday to love yourself as you are and be proud of having a HEALTHY body that is functioning the way a woman's body should function. I don't know if I'll be able to have children and that is terrifying.
I am in school becoming a therapist to help as many people become confident and repair themselves as well as their relationships with others.
PM me if you have any questions or want to talk in private
) Hugs to you beauties. 0 -
An example of the exercise it off mentality, and how he turned it around. Basically, educate yourself massively, so you really know what you are doing to yourself.
Might be a good example, as well as a great site for info.
http://evidencemag.com/why-i-created-impruvism/
I hope more people take time to read this post and read the link attached. Lots of good information here....0 -
I agree with so many others who recommend talking to a health professional. I have had suffered from similar issues since I was 13, Im now 49, and still trying to deal. I am finally getting help.0
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I thought I was fine, now everyone is making me believe that I'm sick (mentally). I asked this question because I was hoping someone would say that I'm not sick.
But be careful not to hear something we're not saying, k? No one is judging you, believe me! Most of us here have been through something like this at one time or another. Heck, as I read this thread I'm realizing I had this exact problem in highschool (punishing myself with exercise) and I didn't even know it was a *thing*! We are standing beside and behind you here, trying to help. Are you willing to hear our genuine concern? Are you willing to at least *consider* that you may have some things going on in your head that might need to be straightened out a bit? Are you willing to find a cure for what ails you? You have lots and lots of great advice on this thread - and guess what? There's a common message coming through from a lot of smart and experienced people here. Are you brave enough to face it and listen? I believe that you won't be sorry, if you do.
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Is it possible to rid yourself of bulimic thoughts/tendencies without a "therapist" or "professional help"? I don't believe in western medicine. I want to cure myself on my own. I've been to a therapist before (for my anxiety) and they did nothing but prescribe medication.
There is absolutely things you can do on your own! Most of treatment is doing it on your own, though please be real with yourself and know when you need to see a professional. Give it a go - I promote self-help books all the time to clients.
Just use google, or go to your local library or a book store and start reading as much as possible.
ETA - Perhaps do some research into anxiety as well, this may benefit when it comes to understanding your fears to gaining weight and coming to terms with that fact that you will gain a lb or two through out your life.0 -
I used to be like that. I was bulimic when i was around your age. I used to eat dinner and then go take a shower and puke everything up. It worked for a whle until one night after eating pizza I went in the shower to purge and got the dough lodged in my esophagus and almost killed myself. After that I was too scared to purge again. Not only does it burn your esophagus, it also ruins your teeth and your metabolism as you get older. I still suffer from self hatred. i think its something inside of you, like your little dark skinny friend in the shadows that only you can see/hear. She will always be with you in a way but you can use it in a healthy way. You probably will never be completely happy with the way you look but you can use it to your advantage.0
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[/quote] I don't want to become too skinny, but I am TERRIFIED of gaining more weight. Is this bad? I tend to worry A LOT about gaining weight and if I do gain a pound, I start to think I look fat and refuse to leave the house.
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Try only weighing in once a week. To limit how often you look at the scale. Then amend your exercise regime the next week accordingly. But everyone that I know that diet is up and down and my doctor told me that once you get in your target range it's normal to be five pounds over one week then the next your on target, or weight less than your target weight. I also have an aunt that is thin.but she sees life kind of like you. If she gains even a few ounces more than what she sees as a good weight she beginning dieting and exercising like her life depends on it. She says she is "fat" but I am fat and know the difference between healthy, pudgy, and obese. So try that option or if you must weight in daily, have a friend do it for you while you stand on the scale backwards. Record the weight and tell you if your doing "fine" or if you need to "step up your workout game". I hope that you can get this under control, I'm positive you can you have already identified what is going on, now to correct it! You will do it, you can do it! Also as a method of research, one of my favorite lifetime movies is about this exact thing. Look it up on youtube and watch it may give you insight on how to deal with this problem, it's called: "A Secret Between Friends" it's a moment of truth movie and it's available to watch as a full movie. Good luck and take care.0 -
[/quote] She will always be with you in a way but you can use it in a healthy way. You probably will never be completely happy with the way you look but you can use it to your advantage.
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I agree, knowing is half the fight! It will definitely work out. I can see her mentoring others on the site about this once she overcomes. People like honesty and transparency when dealing with touchy subjects lime weight. It helps to connect with the if you can do it I can get over it too.0 -
I'm currently trying to maintain my weight by eating 1500-1600 calories a day and exercising 30 min daily. Sometimes I binge, but I never purge afterwards. I only punish myself by doing a lot of exercise afterwards. I don't want to become too skinny, but I am TERRIFIED of gaining more weight. Is this bad? I tend to worry A LOT about gaining weight and if I do gain a pound, I start to think I look fat and refuse to leave the house. I think about food a lot throughout the day and it's really starting to get on my nerves. How do I stop these tendencies or enjoy life but maintain my current weight?
I feel the same way sometimes. I'm really scared to gain weight, too. And when I eat too much or some junk food I feel really guilty and it really bothers me. Just try to eat healthy as possible and you won't have to punish yourself. Workout to feel better, that's what works for me.0 -
I have never been in your situation, but I just wanted to say I hope you reach out for help from a professional. There is no shame in admitting you need help. If you are truly against therapy, have you tried yoga or meditation? I have friends who say both really help relieve their anxiety and stress. ((Hugs))0
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But your original question asks if you are heading towards an eating disorder? The responses you have received are based on your direct question.
It is well worth speaking to your usual family doctor about this. If you have difficulties with self esteem, then talking therapy and self-help can be very helpful and the the suggestion of approaching student welfare is sound. However, if you do have an eating disorder, it is important that you are treated properly, by therapists/nutritionists/psychiatrists/nurses. There are lots of helpful books and mind exercises to help with eating problems, but they should be used as well as, not instead of, proper treatment.0 -
How do I stop these tendencies or enjoy life but maintain my current weight?
I wouldn't say you were showing specific signs of an extreme ED, but you do seem very obsessive and a bit mental. Welcome to the club 0 -
Compulsive exersice is a form of purging. If you feel out of control with eating or with compensating for what you ate, please reconsider. Research this opic because once you start down that road to E.D., it is HARD to turn around. Love your body and do not resort to obbession about it.0
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it can be helpful to challenge urself by eating a food u think is "bad" in moderation and then realizing it was not so bad and u did not gain 5 pounds from a couple of nibbles. It can help to take a rest day rather than obsessively exercising through your tired days and thdn realizing that a day of rest did not result it obesity. Get outside your comfort zone within moderate boundaries and realize it is okay.Is it possible to rid yourself of bulimic thoughts/tendencies without a "therapist" or "professional help"? I don't believe in western medicine. I want to cure myself on my own. I've been to a therapist before (for my anxiety) and they did nothing but prescribe medication.0 -
I posted a post here very similar to yours when I first started losing weight- I very quickly became completely obsessed and wondered if I was heading in a bad direction. All I can say is PLEASE get help now. PLEASE. I've been hospitalised numerous times and my head is completely ruled by all the thoughts and behaviours. Don't let this be your life- don't try to get through it alone. I is a VERY slippery slope. My heart has almost stopped a few times and it just isn't worth it- I WISH I had gotten help sooner but like you I was too worried that if I got help they'd want to interfere with my weightloss. It is hard but try to love yourself for who you are and not as a number (I haven't learned how to do this yet but I want to). I know you don't like western medicine but it is better than ending up with a life totally dominated by an eating disorder. Feel free to add me here if you want to chat. I'm no professional but I do understand and I am very pro-recovery.0
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Budget wise and time wise, I can't go to a psychologist. I have a lot of work to do in university and my parents would be extremely upset to have to send me to some clinic. I thought I was fine, now everyone is making me believe that I'm sick (mentally). I asked this question because I was hoping someone would say that I'm not sick.
If you can't make time for your own health, mentally and physically, than no one else can help you.
Most universities offer free or highly discounted student counseling.
Best of luck to you, OP, but speaking from experience, look for help sooner rather than later, it is a HUGE thing to take on on your own and most people have better success with assistance from a counselor as most EDs are about control, not food.0 -
Budget wise and time wise, I can't go to a psychologist. I have a lot of work to do in university and my parents would be extremely upset to have to send me to some clinic. I thought I was fine, now everyone is making me believe that I'm sick (mentally). I asked this question because I was hoping someone would say that I'm not sick.
Getting help or people suggesting that you do so doesn't necessarily mean that you're sick. Sometimes it's just a matter of learning to nip thinking patterns and habits in the bud so it doesn't snowball.
I think what raised a red flag to me was that you said you were "terrified" of gaining weight and leaving the house, and that is not a fun way to feel. A pound isn't a big deal but our mind tries to trick us into thinking otherwise. Been there. People are just showing concern because of what some of us have been through. It doesn't mean it's the same for you, it's impossible to really diagnose these things over the internets.
I still would suggest some consultation if nobody on here has been able to help and things don't improve for you. Take care!0 -
Is it possible to rid yourself of bulimic thoughts/tendencies without a "therapist" or "professional help"? I don't believe in western medicine. I want to cure myself on my own. I've been to a therapist before (for my anxiety) and they did nothing but prescribe medication.
You saw a psychiatrist... a psychologist (aka therapist) cannot legally perscribe medicine as they are not medical professionals. They do not have their MD's.0 -
Well I can officially report that you are not alone. I am going through the same thing and I know of a few other people who have. It's a cycle: diet - binge - purge, repeat. For me purging is either in the form of fasting or exercise. Though I do really enjoy exercise and would go alot either way, I do do it sometimes to burn calories from a binge. I'm not sure if this makes me bulimic, anarexic, do I have binge eating disorder or all three? In any cause, i've come to terms with the fact that it is a PROBLEM. I'm too embarassed to go to my doctor about it in fear he won't believe me (I am pretty average looking, neither over weight nor under weight), and also I suck at talking about myself and putting myself in the spotlight. My confidence and self worth as plumetted and I'm ruining my 5 year relationship with my BF, I've got anxiety, symptoms of depression and OCD and i've become anti-social in an effort to hide all of this.... I recently got a self-help book and readign through that...and the fatc that i'm aware of all this I hope I can just recover on my own....0
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Well I can officially report that you are not alone. I am going through the same thing and I know of a few other people who have. It's a cycle: diet - binge - purge, repeat. For me purging is either in the form of fasting or exercise. Though I do really enjoy exercise and would go alot either way, I do do it sometimes to burn calories from a binge. I'm not sure if this makes me bulimic, anarexic, do I have binge eating disorder or all three? In any cause, i've come to terms with the fact that it is a PROBLEM. I'm too embarassed to go to my doctor about it in fear he won't believe me (I am pretty average looking, neither over weight nor under weight), and also I suck at talking about myself and putting myself in the spotlight. My confidence and self worth as plumetted and I'm ruining my 5 year relationship with my BF, I've got anxiety, symptoms of depression and OCD and i've become anti-social in an effort to hide all of this.... I recently got a self-help book and readign through that...and the fatc that i'm aware of all this I hope I can just recover on my own....
Being afraid that your doctor won't believe you is a really common problem among people with eating disorders. You don't necessarily need to fit one set of criteria specifically to be diagnosed, either. They may choose the one that fits the most, or just say you're ED-NOS (not otherwise specified) which can be a combo like you said. At my lowest, I didn't think I was skinny enough to be diagnosed and that they'd laugh, but after a few health-related scares I went anyway and was diagnosed with anorexia. I thought the therapist was full of **** and still kinda do, although logically I know that's stupid. I hated going to that therapist and talking about it, and unfortunately I didn't stick with it because there was no one to really hold me accountable. The fact that you're aware you might have a problem is really good, but I think you should try and seek out some professional help because it really is pretty much impossible to fix on your own. I thought I had, and I'm starting to realize that I was wrong (which feels really weird to admit).
Also, if you do go to a doctor, you might feel like they're judging you even if they're not. I know I felt that way when I went. I had stopped having a period, and the psychiatrist asked if I was sure it was because of the disordered eating, and maybe I was just stressed. An off-hand comment like that can be pretty devastating, and doctors are people too and make mistakes in what they say. The important thing is that this is negatively affecting your life, which means it's a real problem and you deserve to be helped.0 -
I posted a post here very similar to yours when I first started losing weight- I very quickly became completely obsessed and wondered if I was heading in a bad direction. All I can say is PLEASE get help now. PLEASE. I've been hospitalised numerous times and my head is completely ruled by all the thoughts and behaviours. Don't let this be your life- don't try to get through it alone. I is a VERY slippery slope. My heart has almost stopped a few times and it just isn't worth it- I WISH I had gotten help sooner but like you I was too worried that if I got help they'd want to interfere with my weightloss. It is hard but try to love yourself for who you are and not as a number (I haven't learned how to do this yet but I want to). I know you don't like western medicine but it is better than ending up with a life totally dominated by an eating disorder. Feel free to add me here if you want to chat. I'm no professional but I do understand and I am very pro-recovery.
i just wanted to say your story is inspiring and I'm so glad to hear you went to get help and are recovering. That's AWESOME, congratulations!!!0 -
Any type of self-induced punishment after eating is not a good thing. Not going to pretend like I know everything, but I've struggled with anorexia and multiple forms of bulimia since I was 13 (22 now). It's a horrible life to live. Don't let your the voice in your head that's causing your worry take control and if continues to do so, talk to someone after you've "binged" and are feeling bad about it. Therapy is always a good option too because they're able to weed things out of you and make sense when you're not able to. Find a healthy hobby to do after you eat, yoga/meditation is great. Anything to get your mind onto a different subject.
Just don't let your worrisome thoughts take over, it's the worse thing you could do.0 -
I don't over exercise though even when I do over-eat/binge. I exercise 30 min-1 hour maximum daily (excludes walking around campus). The only problem that I have is going over my maintenance calories by about 200 and compensating for this by burning 200 doing cardio just to make sure I don't gain weight. I'm not terrified if I gain a pound (I admit, I exaggerated a little bit there), but I am when I realize my clothing gets tighter and the scale shows a number about 3 lbs higher than before. I also tend to have a huge problem with comparing myself to other girls who I feel are thinner. Comparing and realizing I'm the "fatter girl" really brings me down and makes me self conscious. Being called "thunder thighs" and "chunky ( even at the healthy weight I'm at right now) not too long ago is what triggered most of these thoughts. I used to be quite confident with my weight otherwise. I don't know whether this is a form of body dysmorphia or a sign I'm heading towards bulimia. I think this stems from not being satisfied with myself and having low self esteem. I'll try to talk to someone about it. I've already spoken to my family and they've been the biggest support so far. Thanks for the advice you all have given me. It was definitely helpful.0
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I posted a post here very similar to yours when I first started losing weight- I very quickly became completely obsessed and wondered if I was heading in a bad direction. All I can say is PLEASE get help now. PLEASE. I've been hospitalised numerous times and my head is completely ruled by all the thoughts and behaviours. Don't let this be your life- don't try to get through it alone. I is a VERY slippery slope. My heart has almost stopped a few times and it just isn't worth it- I WISH I had gotten help sooner but like you I was too worried that if I got help they'd want to interfere with my weightloss. It is hard but try to love yourself for who you are and not as a number (I haven't learned how to do this yet but I want to). I know you don't like western medicine but it is better than ending up with a life totally dominated by an eating disorder. Feel free to add me here if you want to chat. I'm no professional but I do understand and I am very pro-recovery.
i just wanted to say your story is inspiring and I'm so glad to hear you went to get help and are recovering. That's AWESOME, congratulations!!!
I had no choice to get help or not, i'd had a blood test that showed a rock bottom potassium level from the eating disorder- without going to the hospital my heart would have stopped. Recovering is a strange word- a scary one really because a lot of people associate it with gaining weight...a concept that can be rather terrifying. I've got the right help now to at least try and work in the right directions. I just can stress how important it is to get help early on and not let is spiral completely out of control- because the longer you let it go the harder it is to fix.
But thankyou for your kind words 0 -
In my opinion, no. You need professional help if you believe you have ED tendencies.Is it possible to rid yourself of bulimic thoughts/tendencies without a "therapist" or "professional help"? I don't believe in western medicine. I want to cure myself on my own. I've been to a therapist before (for my anxiety) and they did nothing but prescribe medication.0 -
OP, even if it doesn't totally apply, here is why some of your wording and such is catching one's attention.
This is same site I referenced because the author had a similar problem with undereating and over-exercising and body image.
Now a timely main article, with study references as to what are good signs of heading down a bad road.
http://impruvism.com/body-image-disorder-signs/0 -
Is it possible to rid yourself of bulimic thoughts/tendencies without a "therapist" or "professional help"? I don't believe in western medicine. I want to cure myself on my own. I've been to a therapist before (for my anxiety) and they did nothing but prescribe medication.
Didn't read the rest of the thread so I don't know if someone mentioned this , but have you ever considered DBT? It's a type of therapy to retrain behaviours... it doesn't include the prescription or use of any kind of medication. It's literally a cognitive behaviour therapy.0
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