Responses

nmiller0813

I was having a conversation with someone that was well over 300lbs. We were talking about losing weight and they stated that they don't have a problem with food, it is just that they don't eat often enough.

Now I know that this can not be true, but I did not know how to respond without offending. Suggestions?

This has happened to me more than once.

chickenz

The person is not ready to lose weight. I would not respond to that comment, change the subject.

seltzermint555

While I would agree that the person is not ready to lose weight or hasn't yet discovered how to lose weight...I also think it may kind of be true.

A lot of the time I hear stories about binging here on MFP, people eating crazy amounts of calories and stuff. That is a very real problem for many people. But not every "fat person" is a binge eater! Some are quite the opposite!

I used to weigh 307. I ate when I felt hungry. That meant some days I ate 700-800 cal and other days, 3,000 and higher. I'm not lying or deluding myself. That's how it was for me, for years and years. I thought something was wrong with my metabolism because I was not secretly eating on those low calorie days...yet I didn't lose weight. On a regular basis, my fast food order was a small burger no cheese and a diet soda. My friends who were 100 lb lighter than me usually got a cheeseburger, fries, and a regular Coke.

Now I'm not saying I didn't eat too much. I did sometimes. I ignorantly sucked down lattes with 400 cal thinking they were only slightly 'worse' than regular coffee with creamer. But I was NEVER in my house secretly snarfing Oreos and whole chickens. I think a lot of people, especially thinner people with binge eating disorders, think that's what everyone over 200 lb does in private. No.

My ex husband was in the range of 280-350 lb for most the decade I was with him. He usually ate 1-2 times per day. He woke up in the morning and smoked a cigarette and maybe had some coffee. Then he didn't usually eat until he got home from work in the afternoon/early evening. He may have eaten a lot - a whole pizza sometimes, or a footlong sub, followed up with dessert. But I GUARANTEE that most days he was not even eating 2,000 calories.

A lot of people are very quick to say "it's so simple, calories in/calories out". I don't believe that entirely. Mainly because I know in years past when I would make an effort to eat healthier (with no clue of what appropriate calories were for me) I would not lose any weight or inches, and I believe in that starvation mode stuff that other people here often say is 100% untrue. For example I know for SURE that in 2008-2009 when I was first starting to exercise more and eat healthier, I was barely losing. I was not aware about eating exercise calories and I walked 2-3 miles every night. I ate less than I eat right now (1,350 daily) and it took me 4 years to lose 45 lb.

I don't claim to have the answers to all of this mysterious stuff but I believe there are people out there who are very overweight/obese and not eating enough and/or often enough and not losing weight because of it.

qtgonewild

i thought the same thing before i figured this whole thing out. I thought i was fat because i only ate once a day. and my body was holding on to what i ate. because truly i only ate once a day. but what I ATE was at least 2000 + calories from a fast food restaurant. Notice I said ate once a day.. that statement is accurate, however it doesnt include the proabably 2 liters of coke i would drink a day as well. so slowly but surely the weight creeped up. i never even paid attention as in my brain i thought i was skinnier then i was, until my eyes opened i saw myself clearly and something clicked. i signed up on here the next day and havent looked back. i had to train myself to eat properly. and so far so good. this is something i will be able to sustain for life and I am so happy now that I have been educated on healthier living and eating.

wheird

Many people who are overweight do not realize they are eating more than they think. Oftentimes they believe they are eating 45% less than they actually are. They might graze while preparing food, adding hundreds of calories per day. Or simply forget that they had a snack. Those people who actually log what they are eating are usually very surprised.

Contrary to what someone said above, it IS all about calories in versus calories out.

arghbowl

But I was NEVER in my house secretly snarfing Oreos and whole chickens.

What's wrong with whole chickens? IIFYM...

seltzermint555

Many people who are overweight do not realize they are eating more than they think. Oftentimes they believe they are eating 45% less than they actually are. They might graze while preparing food, adding hundreds of calories per day. Or simply forget that they had a snack. Those people who actually log what they are eating are usually very surprised.

Contrary to what someone said above, it IS all about calories in versus calories out.

I think there's a lot of truth in this I just don't believe it's the last word or complete explanation.

I started MFP with about 1600 calories per day and for awhile I was eating around 1200 and didn't lose weight for a month. Went back to 1500-1600 and lost 11 lb the following month.

nmiller0813

i thought the same thing before i figured this whole thing out. I thought i was fat because i only ate once a day. and my body was holding on to what i ate. because truly i only ate once a day. but what I ATE was at least 2000 + calories from a fast food restaurant. Notice I said ate once a day.. that statement is accurate, however it doesnt include the proabably 2 liters of coke i would drink a day as well. so slowly but surely the weight creeped up. i never even paid attention as in my brain i thought i was skinnier then i was, until my eyes opened i saw myself clearly and something clicked. i signed up on here the next day and havent looked back. i had to train myself to eat properly. and so far so good. this is something i will be able to sustain for life and I am so happy now that I have been educated on healthier living and eating.

In my past, I felt that I did not eat alot, but I failed to realize that I ate FAST FOOD most days of the week and I grazed all day long. I ate something sweet every single day, so I see where they may think that they don't eat alot. But, my question was more geared to how do I respond when I am told this.

More often than not, we are having a conversation about my weight loss and that is when I hear that... untruth!!! :-)

wheird

Many people who are overweight do not realize they are eating more than they think. Oftentimes they believe they are eating 45% less than they actually are. They might graze while preparing food, adding hundreds of calories per day. Or simply forget that they had a snack. Those people who actually log what they are eating are usually very surprised.

Contrary to what someone said above, it IS all about calories in versus calories out.

I think there's a lot of truth in this I just don't believe it's the last word or complete explanation.

I started MFP with about 1600 calories per day and for awhile I was eating around 1200 and didn't lose weight for a month. Went back to 1500-1600 and lost 11 lb the following month.

And why do you think that is?

skullshank

Many people who are overweight do not realize they are eating more than they think. Oftentimes they believe they are eating 45% less than they actually are. They might graze while preparing food, adding hundreds of calories per day. Or simply forget that they had a snack. Those people who actually log what they are eating are usually very surprised.

Contrary to what someone said above, it IS all about calories in versus calories out.

I think there's a lot of truth in this I just don't believe it's the last word or complete explanation.

I started MFP with about 1600 calories per day and for awhile I was eating around 1200 and didn't lose weight for a month. Went back to 1500-1600 and lost 11 lb the following month.

And why do you think that is?

RIP Uncle Phil

seltzermint555

I honestly do not know. It was a huge mystery and surprise to me. I don't think it's seriously "starvation mode" when a person is clearly healthy and overweight, but I think there's something along those lines at play. You can disagree, or refute that...doesn't really make a difference to me. I'm not claiming to know the answers. Just my experience and observations!