Tossing out my scale and gaining back my sanity

ouiouilezizi

Hi Everyone,

I have made the New Year's Resolution to cast aside goal-oriented "dieting" this year, which always leaves me mentally and physically exhausted and often, fails to encourage lasting change. Over the holidays I watched my father begin yet another fad diet, this time choosing a 60 day juice fast. Watching him "passionately" drink nothing but green juice on Christmas and raving about how amazing he feels, made me realize something: I do not want to be him in 20 years. I am exhausted from seeing friends, family and myself, postpone happiness until some meaningless quantitative goal is achieved, whether it is a weight loss target or a goal to "eat nothing but kale for a month."

Coming from a family that is entrenched in a vicious cycle of binging and then yo-yo dieting, this is no easy task. Tossing my scale into the garage is a huge step for someone who has, since 4th grade, based my level of self-confidence and happiness on my body size and weight. This decision to end goal-oriented dieting has thus far, made me extremely happy! I am focusing on the process, instead of the results, and am hoping to forge lasting habits this year, instead of my normal goal to "lose X number of pounds."

I am hoping to add one new, easily-attainable habit each month in 2014. I would LOVE advice on some processes that would make good habits towards a life of healthy living (and eventually, weight loss if it is meant to be!) Here's what I am thinking so far:

January: Focus on walking or doing cardio for 10-minutes a day (although, I usually have found myself going over).
February: Begin the habit of tracking my dinners each night-- no calorie goal yet though.
March: Use my foam roller + stretch for 10 minutes every night.
April: Add a piece of fruit to every breakfast and a vegetable to every lunch and dinner

As you can see, these are SUPER easy habits... so easy, that the old me is cringing. But, I think that's a good thing.

Please send suggestions for habits my way!

Happy New Year!

GiGiBeans

I think your plan is very doable. Small changes are easier to make and stick with. Happy new year :drinker:

mintymyn4

I'm tossing out my scale too because it makes me nuts! So I am with you on this and wish you much luck and happiness!

BeccaBollons

Beautifully written. And I can relate. My father has tried all sorts too, and yet is now bigger than ever!

I'm not ready to get rid of the scale yet, but I have set myself some fitness goals.

1) Drink more water
2) For January I am challenging myself to do one extra push-up per day. I am ahead of schedule though, I can do 11 and its only 8th Jan.
3) In Feb I want to be able to do pull-ups- that is going to be a real challenge.
That's as far ahead as I'm thinking right now. I really hope you reach your goals. Like you say, they seem easy, but they will make a huge difference!
All the best

Dewymorning

Small but realistic goals are great.

Better to do something small and actually stick to it then to have an ambitious goal and give up.

callyart

I agree it can be stressful losing weight and can take over your life. I think it is a great idea what you are doing. Maintaining those goals with certainly make you healthier, and if you're happier not counting and stepping on the scales - perfect!

Good luck

SezxyStef

Yah the only scale I own is my food scale.

I did what you are doing last year at this time.

Starting January 7th I changed my eating habits and did 20mins of light cardio everyday, and guess what lost 30lbs by late april...I knew this because I had to be cloths that were 3-4 sizes smaller then what I had...it felt good.

Then between may and june I kept up the exercise and added in body weight stuff like squats...

June 17th I join MFP started tracking and started 30day shred.....it kicked my butt. In one month I had lost another 3lbs but lost 9inches. That is when I discovered a group here Eat Train Progress...and read this post.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/872212-you-re-probably-eating-more-than-you-think

I took 2 weeks of from 30day shred Lost another pound, bought a food scale...lost 1lb the first week I used my food scale (from 1/2lb a week)

I started my 2nd round of 30ds, lost 4.25lbs...yup that's right...1.25lbs more then the first time (food scales did it) and lost another 4 inches...

Moved to TDEE-20% and started lifting in September.

I love it...I am down another 6.25lbs, another 3.5 inches and in a size 8....started at a 16/18, down from 205 to 165 (gained a bit over the holidays)...

All small changes...and again this year small changes

Added in HIIT training on my off days from lifting...20mins last night (kicked my butt) still lifting and I am going to start working on chinups/pull ups.....

Still no scale in my house except my food scale.

These small changes helped me get rid of "weight" goals and focus on clothing size, strenght gains, bf%...why because I weight 165 and am almost as small as someone who weighs 125lbs...I look at pics of woman who are not light weights who lift all the time and show my friends to help them get over this "weight" goal...and it's working slowly but surely.

They too are seeing that weight is not the end all to be all...that you can be 5 ft 4 weigh 128lbs and still be tiny...muscle is dense and takes up less space then fat...hence you look small but still weigh what you do...my sister being the main one.

good luck to you in your journey, keep up with the small changes and watch them all come together as one big change.

twixlepennie

Have you read the book Intuitive Eating, by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch? It's geared towards people who have been yo yo dieters in the past and how to move past that, heal mentally and then learn how to listen to your body and start there for better health and happiness. They also have a website/forum. It's a great book and is not a dieting plan per se. I learned a few things from it that I've now incorporated into my maintenance plan.

Nascha333

Me too, just yesterday. It's been bringing me down because i fluctuate so much (water retention after workouts and that time of month for us girlies) so it was a constant up and down and in the end was killing my motivation. What hasn't killed my motivation is the 10 inches i've lost in the past 5 weeks from working out and eating healthy, i look in the mirror and find i look slimmer, looking back, the scale hasn't done me any good... now the measuring tape on the other hand...

Good for you, positive thinking will get you where you want to go.

Francl27

I can't imagine tossing my scale. How do you know how many calories you're supposed to eat if you don't have one? How do you know that your plan is actually working and you're not actually eating more than you should? Without saying, the bad surprise at the doctor when you have to weigh there (I weighed myself here this morning even though I know I've been retaining water like crazy just so I don't want to cry when I go to the doctor later).

The scale makes you accountable, even if you rarely use it. And it doesn't mean you can't measure yourself too...

morty1966

I have been working through 'Beck: diet solution' which helps you to tackle poor eating habits and gives you the tools to eat normally. I particularly like the following:

1. No eating standing up. Think about that for a minute. how many times to you eat a bit of this, a bit of that whilst standing in the kitchen? How often are you taking a bite out of that sandwich before you have sat down? Eating should be slow and meaningful, and enjoyed. I really enjoy my food and take the time to sit and eat it.

2. Hunger is not an emergency. I do not have to eat the moment I get hungry, I can actually wait until my next meal unless I have planned to eat something. My only exceptions are if I am going to exercise and I am hungry, I will eat something small. How many times do you say to your kids 'I know you are hungry but you will have your dinner in a bit, just wait' and then stuffed something in your mouth because ... well just because.

There are more but those are the two that really made me think and change my eating. I've lost 24 lb now.

fruttibiscotti

Hmmmm...tossing the scale out? How can you improve what you don't measure? I don't get it.

SezxyStef

I can't imagine tossing my scale. How do you know how many calories you're supposed to eat if you don't have one? How do you know that your plan is actually working and you're not actually eating more than you should? Without saying, the bad surprise at the doctor when you have to weigh there (I weighed myself here this morning even though I know I've been retaining water like crazy just so I don't want to cry when I go to the doctor later).

The scale makes you accountable, even if you rarely use it. And it doesn't mean you can't measure yourself too...

If you are using a food scale and counting calories you wont get a nasty surprise.

As for how many calories to eat.....ah...easy based on your last weight, and tossing out the scale doesn't mean you don't weigh yourself it means you don't weigh yourself everyday 3-10x a day and obsess over that number.

How do you know the plan is working...tape measure, cloths etc.

The scale doesn't make you accountable...you make yourself accountable.

Hmmmm...tossing the scale out? How can you improve what you don't measure? I don't get it.

easy...you take different measurments....tape measure, clothing, strenght, bf%...

Weight is not the end all to be all...for example ...I weigh 165 and am 5 ft 7 and wear a size 8....my friend is 5 ft 4 and weighs 125 and wears a size 6...40lbs difference, that is not totally accounted for in our height...3inches does not weight 40lbs...

I will be in a smaller size then woman who are my stats and weigh less because I understand that muscle takes up less space then fat therefore I can weigh 150 and still wear a size 4-6.

morty1966

Before losing this weight I spent a year not trying to lose weight but learning how to eat normally and not put weight on. It made all the difference. I didn't weigh myself much and stopped stressing so much about it all. I wasn't happy with my size, but I still had lots of fun and enjoyed life.

It showed me that my problem wasn't what I ate, but my obsession with what I ate. Once I stopped obsessing, it all got so much easier. Now I have some really good eating habits and it shows. I've lost over 20lbs, I look and feel better physically, but it hasn't changed my life. Not really. I'm still the same person, just a thinner and healthier version. I eat better now than I have done for years. I eat foods that were on my 'forbidden' list for years; cheese, chocolate, cake. All done in moderation and if I don't have them its not the end of the world.

I believe that changing how you think is more important than changing what you eat. Until you change how you think and feel about food you will forever be struggling to diet and lose those elusive pounds. Beck's book did it for me, it made all the difference. It might not work for everyone, but I found it life changing.

Unknown

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SezxyStef

I generally disagree with "throwing out the scale" as MFP people like to say. Data is data. And, your weight is a data point of others. Your have measurements such as waist size, hip and leg and arm measurements. You have body fat which can be done a bunch of different ways, and I think all these are useful. One measure I love is when scale weight increase, but waist goes down, and BF also goes down. It's usually an epiphany for people to understand how all this stuff works together.

I think you should keep the scale and weigh in monthly, as a check point. It's fun to think you're just eliminating the scale and forget about body weight, but body weight is a factor, scale or no scale.

This is fine if you don't step on the scale...most people that own one use it to much.

Just because you don't own a scale doesn't mean you don't weigh yourself. I don't own one and wont...but I weigh myself at work once a week, but it's not what is the end all to be all but yes it is one measurment and can be useful as long as you don't obsess over it and I think the OP was based on what I read.

Unknown

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twixlepennie

I generally disagree with "throwing out the scale" as MFP people like to say. Data is data. And, your weight is a data point of others. Your have measurements such as waist size, hip and leg and arm measurements. You have body fat which can be done a bunch of different ways, and I think all these are useful. One measure I love is when scale weight increase, but waist goes down, and BF also goes down. It's usually an epiphany for people to understand how all this stuff works together.

I think you should keep the scale and weigh in monthly, as a check point. It's fun to think you're just eliminating the scale and forget about body weight, but body weight is a factor, scale or no scale.

This is fine if you don't step on the scale...most people that own one use it to much.

Just because you don't own a scale doesn't mean you don't weigh yourself. I don't own one and wont...but I weigh myself at work once a week, but it's not what is the end all to be all but yes it is one measurment and can be useful as long as you don't obsess over it and I think the OP was based on what I read.

So, you've surveyed everyone in the world?

:laugh:

I weigh daily as part of my maintenance plan. But, I have absolutely no emotion attached to the scale/numbers. I wake up, weigh, record it in my graph and then move on with my day. It's like brushing my teeth or combing my hair. Weighing in on a scale is a great tool to use for weight loss/maintenance, but you have to learn how to have a healthy relationship with it/remove emotions from it.

Holly_Roman_Empire

I can't imagine tossing my scale. How do you know how many calories you're supposed to eat if you don't have one? How do you know that your plan is actually working and you're not actually eating more than you should? Without saying, the bad surprise at the doctor when you have to weigh there (I weighed myself here this morning even though I know I've been retaining water like crazy just so I don't want to cry when I go to the doctor later).

The scale makes you accountable, even if you rarely use it. And it doesn't mean you can't measure yourself too...

This is how I know how many calories I need to eat: Takes off clothes, looks in mirror. Satisfied? Okay, maintenance calories time! Not satisfied? Keep eating calorie deficit and exercising. Not seeing any changes? Lower calories and/or change workouts. Easy peasy, and it's so liberating.

mccindy72

I generally disagree with "throwing out the scale" as MFP people like to say. Data is data. And, your weight is a data point of others. Your have measurements such as waist size, hip and leg and arm measurements. You have body fat which can be done a bunch of different ways, and I think all these are useful. One measure I love is when scale weight increase, but waist goes down, and BF also goes down. It's usually an epiphany for people to understand how all this stuff works together.

I think you should keep the scale and weigh in monthly, as a check point. It's fun to think you're just eliminating the scale and forget about body weight, but body weight is a factor, scale or no scale.

This is fine if you don't step on the scale...most people that own one use it to much.

Just because you don't own a scale doesn't mean you don't weigh yourself. I don't own one and wont...but I weigh myself at work once a week, but it's not what is the end all to be all but yes it is one measurment and can be useful as long as you don't obsess over it and I think the OP was based on what I read.

So, you've surveyed everyone in the world?

:laugh:

I weigh daily as part of my maintenance plan. But, I have absolutely no emotion attached to the scale/numbers. I wake up, weigh, record it in my graph and then move on with my day. It's like brushing my teeth or combing my hair. Weighing in on a scale is a great tool to use for weight loss/maintenance, but you have to learn how to have a healthy relationship with it/remove emotions from it.

Yes. I weigh myself daily, in the morning, but I don't see it as an emotional experience. It's just one more piece of data to use. And you have to realize that weight changes and fluctuates based on water retention. If you look at it as just one piece of information in your list (weight, measurements, calories in /calories out, clothing sizes, and how you feel), it won't be so large in your mind.

Darrelkun

Great idea, and I'm glad you're feeling happier because of it!

Weight is just a number. What matters is how you feel. How you feel in your clothes, how you feel in your activities, and how you feel in your skin.