Stressed out by eating with others

gimedatnow

Has anyone else struggled with eating around other people? Usually a very social person, I love seeing my friends and spending time with my family, but since early last year, whenever it comes to eating food or sitting down for a meal, I get so anxious that I almost feel sick. I take almost all of my meals alone, and when sitting with a group of people eating, I save my food and eat by myself later, even at restaurants. Over the past few months, I've avoided going to reunions or holiday parties or having dinner with friends just to avoid these situations.

I'm not sure why I'm so nervous. I've never like eating food prepared by others, but now I don't even like eating my own food with other people. Logically, I know that nobody cares how much or what I'm eating, so I don't think that I feel judged or feel guilty for eating. I just hate this feeling. Has anyone else felt the same? How did you deal with it?

*editted out typo*

ndj1979

never had this issue…

do you suffer from similar anxiety issue in other areas of your life?

gimedatnow

No, I'm usually a very stable person. It's really just anxiety about eating and food

ndj1979

IDK …

but you only get anxious about food when eating with people?

gimedatnow

Usually... It's especially bad if we're eating out or eating something that isn't particularly good for you, like ice cream or dessert. Like, I feel fine eating cake occasionally by myself, but I would never eat it in public.

ndj1979

sounds like you have some kind of weird relationships with food as it relates to public places..you might want to talk to a professional about it...

SimoneBee12

Do you eat dinner with your family often?
Maybe you should start with something like that, eating with one person, and gradually increasing.
You're right, no one actually cares about how much, or what, you eat.
If it's stopping you from being social, or from getting the right amount of calories and nutrients on days that you go out, I'd suggest seeing a professional about it, they'll give you some good tactics to help get past this anxiety.

Yabiwaz

I feel like this a lot too! Don't worry about it, maybe suggest inviting friends and family to yours instead so you can control the portion size and remember that it is okay to say "no" to any desserts or starters when out.

kimosabe1

I am the same way. I don't even eat with my hubby usually but I am comfortable eating around other people because i'm smaller than them.

ALNoog

I do.... But only because my husband told me that my trying to eat healthy was making everyone else's life a living hell......

fificrazy

This definitely sounds like disordered eating. And ED behaviors are actually all considered an ill-coping mechanism for what's really an anxiety disorder. Definitely should talk to a professional about how to address this problem.

aliceinweightlossland

This definitely sounds like disordered eating. And ED behaviors are actually all considered an ill-coping mechanism for what's really an anxiety disorder. Definitely should talk to a professional about how to address this problem.

I'm not sure you need to seek therapy, but this definitely spot-on. If you can recognize that you're practicing avoidance, then you've taken the first step. This is not a diet, this is your life. You cannot avoid eating socially or with family forever, and it would be nonsensical to try. Be confident in your choices for a healthy lifestyle. If you are concerned that friends or family will ask questions, then be prepared for them. People are naturally curious, but it will wane as they see you're serious and it becomes more of who you are and less of a novelty you're immersing yourself in temporarily.

If you are practicing a safe, healthy lifestyle, then no one should be concerned. In fact, they will probably be proud or inspired.