I JUST WANT TO BE NORMAL

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  • 2Dozen
    2Dozen Posts: 66 Member
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    You dont have to be miserable to be healthy, everything in moderation. Im 30 yrs old 68 in 170lbs 6.4% bodyfat, and i eat what i want. When i do go overboard (Sundays all the time) I have the motivation to get out and run 5 miles.
  • fishnbrah
    fishnbrah Posts: 550
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    I love to eat healthy, don't get me wrong. i enjoy the feeling of being healthy, and more importantly, I am much more confident in the way that I look now. But, I also feel SO ANGRY when I eat everything in plain sight simply because I am letting "loose" one day. My friends/family are SO supportive, but I hate not being able to just go out for dinner with them and have a good time because there is no way that I could fit the food that they eat without eating NOTHING but that the entire day! I guess my point is, I just want to go out, eat what I want and when I want, not feel like a monster when I let loose, and still feel satisfied.

    It just sucks because id love to order pizza, bake cookies and brownies, and slop around the entire day once in a while.

    Just needed to vent. Thanks for reading.

    try intermittent fasting, thats what i do. i eat whatever i want pretty much. ate a whole pizza the other day for dinner and still had cals to spare
  • Kenazwa
    Kenazwa Posts: 278 Member
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    From where I'm sitting, having food issues IS normal. This one is on paleo and that one is gluten free and this other one is vegan ... on and on it goes. I know very few people who get hungry and eat what they want without drama.
  • bridall
    bridall Posts: 45 Member
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    My calories are at the number they are because I don't exercise! I am a student and also have a job so i find it difficult to find time to exercise. I also never exercised while I was losing weight. I just really focused on the numbers. I do understand that exercising will allow me to eat more, but its not something that I have ever really done for a long period of time, and also isnt something that I have time for. I do have access to my school gym for free and I am at school five times a week, but after a LONG day of being at school from 9-6 and working on weekends, I have ZERO motivation/time/energy to go to the gym.

    My calories for the day are similar to yours because I'm not interested in doing formal gym style exercise. Instead I got a Fitbit to help me. All the movement you do walking around campus and at your job add up.
    A Fitbit or something similar might help you release that you burn more calories in a day than you realise. My Fitbit recorded movement often bumps me up close to 2000 calories.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
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    I love to eat healthy, don't get me wrong. i enjoy the feeling of being healthy, and more importantly, I am much more confident in the way that I look now. But, I also feel SO ANGRY when I eat everything in plain sight simply because I am letting "loose" one day. My friends/family are SO supportive, but I hate not being able to just go out for dinner with them and have a good time because there is no way that I could fit the food that they eat without eating NOTHING but that the entire day! I guess my point is, I just want to go out, eat what I want and when I want, not feel like a monster when I let loose, and still feel satisfied.

    It just sucks because id love to order pizza, bake cookies and brownies, and slop around the entire day once in a while.

    Just needed to vent. Thanks for reading.

    I dont understand…

    why can't you go out to dinner with your friends and family? Why can't you eat some pizza, cookies, etc?

    This is what happens when you restrict foods and say that is "bad" so i am not going to eat it. Do you really think it is sustainable to say I am never going to go out to dinner with my friends, or to say I am never going to have cookies or pizza, ever again?

    Here is a more sensible approach…eat some of the foods that you want about 20% of the time, the other 80% eat healthy and maintain your calorie deficit. On some days you might even eat up to maintenance but that is no big deal either…and on other days - Thanksgiving, Christmas, Birthday - you might even have a blow out…the important part is that the majority of the time lets say 85% you maintain your healthy eating habits and stay in a deficit…

    The approach that you are following is going to lead to frustration - as you already see - eventual failure/binging, and then remorse...
  • Confuzzled4ever
    Confuzzled4ever Posts: 2,860 Member
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    Normal?? Who's normal?? *hides in corner* that's an insult in my world :bigsmile:

    hmmm..

    if you're too busy to exercise the traditional way, what about a 10 minute run after dinner? Or do a 20 minute workout video at home? or a 20 minute fast walk? Anything helps and will give you a little wiggle room.

    Also.. I firmly believe that not worrying about what you eat once in a while is important for mental health. I also think that the bet way to kick a plateau's butt is by allowing yourself to gain a pound or two.

    I get into food/exercise ruts too.. I eat the same thing over and over and over and find not only am I sick of it.. but i'm starting to look at the M&Ms more closely. I have to change it up, try new different recipes to keep myself in it.
    Same with exercise.. I do the same things over and over and over and get bored of going. I just signed up for kickboxing, gloves and all.. I can't wait to try it! And i'm playing kickball tomorrow.. just for something different! LOL
  • katznkt
    katznkt Posts: 320 Member
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    Hmmm.

    Eat out but just make better choices. You should never be starving on 1700 calories unless you prioritize cal dense food. If you eat a few days to satiety with just lean protein and veggies, you will then know how many calories you have for treats. Like quest bars. Or dessert. I can eat at just about any place and find a chicken and veggie dish that fit into my goals. Then when I want the occasional special Meal, I have whatever I want and enjoy it. But I make sure I go back to making better choices the next meal. And that is still on losing. Maintenance should be the same, but just more flexible and relaxed.

    The only time I was hungry was when I wasn't getting enough protein veggies and fiber. I could eat 1000 cal of healthy protein and veggies and have 700 of yummy treats and be full and satisfied. Or I could do 17 100 cal packs and be starving.

    But really... I don't want to be "normal" again. That is how I got 100lbs overweight. I'll settle for healthy and fit but food choice aware.

    Also, I work full time and go to classes at night. I also commute 3 hours a day and run my kids to activities on weekends. I still manage to exercise 30 minutes 4 or 5 times a week. Between classes I run up and down the stairs in my building. I add in wall pushups while waiting for my professor. I fidget and move my legs chronically. Any chance I have to increase my movement I take so I can have more calories. It took a while, but now it is habit and not a problem. But to get there, I had to realize that not all physical activity has to involve an hour at the gym to be helpful. And I found that moving more helped me focus more in class. Bonus!
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
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    Yes im in maintenance and my calories are set to 1740. It's just so hard for me to fit in restaurant food and still feel satisfied at the end of the day so I try not to do it. Is that my problem? I am hungrier at night so I try to save most (1300) of my calories for then BUT I STILL feel hungry while eating things like fruit, dark chocolate, a quest bar, almond milk, etc ALL after dinner

    1740 for maintenance seems kind of low to me. I eat 1,700 to lose a pound a week.

    I can cut as low as 1800 during a cut and I'm a guy. This is going to depend on a variety of factors.

    an aggressive cut for me is about 1700 to 1800 …but my gym performance starts to go down the crapper when I do that...
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
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    Yes im in maintenance and my calories are set to 1740. It's just so hard for me to fit in restaurant food and still feel satisfied at the end of the day so I try not to do it. Is that my problem? I am hungrier at night so I try to save most (1300) of my calories for then BUT I STILL feel hungry while eating things like fruit, dark chocolate, a quest bar, almond milk, etc ALL after dinner

    1740 for maintenance seems kind of low to me. I eat 1,700 to lose a pound a week.

    I can cut as low as 1800 during a cut and I'm a guy. This is going to depend on a variety of factors.

    an aggressive cut for me is about 1700 to 1800 …but my gym performance starts to go down the crapper when I do that...

    Now, that is absolutely true.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
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    Yes im in maintenance and my calories are set to 1740. It's just so hard for me to fit in restaurant food and still feel satisfied at the end of the day so I try not to do it. Is that my problem? I am hungrier at night so I try to save most (1300) of my calories for then BUT I STILL feel hungry while eating things like fruit, dark chocolate, a quest bar, almond milk, etc ALL after dinner

    1740 for maintenance seems kind of low to me. I eat 1,700 to lose a pound a week.

    I can cut as low as 1800 during a cut and I'm a guy. This is going to depend on a variety of factors.

    an aggressive cut for me is about 1700 to 1800 …but my gym performance starts to go down the crapper when I do that...

    Now, that is absolutely true.

    I think I questioned it being low because I have a maintain range. I don't see losses at 1950 (which is my MFP maintain) unless I go for several weeks (at least 6 -- being very precise) and then I will see very small ones, .2, .4. Which are EASILY masked by water gain, TOM etc. I don't actually gain until I start going over 2,300. But it can look like gain sooner because water, TOM.

    I think I just wanted to make sure OP knew 1740 was her magic number and wasn't blindly relying on MFP. Like, so worried about re-gaining she wasn't toying around with her calories/macros to see what's actually going to be sustrainable for her. It seem reasonable to me that if she usually eats 1,740 but has a sepecial occasion and eats and extra 300-500, it's not really going to cause her to gain unless it's happening a lot. Basically, the rope probably isn't as tight as she thinks.

    I just can't imagine not being about to work out having pizza or going out.

    That said, I second the Fitbit idea, OP.


    ETA: I was also totally assuming OP worked out cause of her user name -- that is another reason I was thinking her maintain should be higher than 1740. I hated worked out too OP, then I started lifting and just walking. Turns out I just hate lots of high intensity cardio.
  • fitnotskinnyxo
    fitnotskinnyxo Posts: 38 Member
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    I totally wish it was just a 300-500 calorie surplus once in a while.. more like 4000 calorie surplus once a month. That cant be good for me..
  • Strongandhealthy1234
    Strongandhealthy1234 Posts: 52
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    Sometimes I feel this way, too. What helps me feel really good most of the time about eating healthy is my routines. I literally look forward to the foods that I am eating. And that takes my mind off the "other" foods that other people might be ordering. So my daily choices are not only wholesome but really appealing to me. So when I think of restaurant food etc, I don't think it's such a treat because I already eat my treats. I hope that makes sense somewhat.
  • tashamoulds
    tashamoulds Posts: 13
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    I feel that way sometimes. My roommates can eat all the bad food they want and not do any exercise (maybe a tiny bit of yoga once in a while) and they still don't gain weight. However what I found works for me (before the holiday season punched me) is to have not one, but several cheat days.
    I chose 1 day of the week to get a burger or a slice of pizza (I usually don't go and eat a whole pizza though), instead of 1 healthy meal, then one day of the week ( a different day though) to have a good old fashioned, huge breakfast (a waffle or bagle, hash browns, fruit, and sausage or bacon, but do what you like). Then I chose one day of the month to have a dessert day instead of a burger or large breakfast. That seems to keep me on track as far as healthy eating goes.
    Another note, don't beat yourself up if you cheat more than once a week, that sounds counter intuitive but it's a better way of dealing with cheating more than you should. When you fall down just brush the dirt off (figuratively) and continue with you good eating habits and exercise, beating yourself up over it is just going to make you more depressed, making it harder to stay motivated.
    Note: For the average weekday I allow myself 2,000 calories because i sprint for long periods of time (I can't jog, it's boring), weight lift, I walk up hills all day and stairs, and I do heavy lifting at work. But I usually only get about 1400-1600. I don't know why, it just works out that way.
  • robynrae_1
    robynrae_1 Posts: 712 Member
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    I totally wish it was just a 300-500 calorie surplus once in a while.. more like 4000 calorie surplus once a month. That cant be good for me..

    even if you splurge once a month at 4000 calories thats only a difference of 133 calories a day for a month. (this is assuming that you ate your normal 1740 plus the extra 4000.) That just means that you make the adjustments.
    I would also sugest trying to eat more fats or protiens to help with the always hungry feeling.
  • Miffylou
    Miffylou Posts: 307 Member
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    Life is here to be enjoyed, just because you're being healthy doesn't mean you can't go out and enjoy herself. For me this is a lifestyle change and there us no way I'm not going out for the rest of my life.

    My co-workers tell me I'm not normal all the time, my response is always the same. "and I'm ok with that". Because if not being normal has made me lose 22kgs than that's fine with me.

    I still go out and enjoy all the food I like. Yesterday I had pizza but only had one slice. Today I went out for lunch and had salt and pepper squid with salad and shared some wedges with my daughter. Tomorrow I'm going out for lunch again, not sure what I'll have yet, but have looked at the menu so I know in advance there will be something that I like.

    It's all about moderation. I'd rather eat in moderation and know that in the morning I'm still going to have the energy to wake up and go for a run or go to the gym and feel good about myself, than wake up and feel like crap.

    ????????
  • Iwishyouwell
    Iwishyouwell Posts: 1,888 Member
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    Ah, the incredible joys of adding one or two fasting days a week. I too eat "healthy" the majority of times, but the way I finally learned to let go of all this drama surrounding food, and to feel "normal", was to IF; I've come light years away from my former dysfunctions with dieting and food, but this was the final click for me. With my fasting days I enjoy a nice reprieve from eating that builds in a natural calorie deficit week after week. Allowing me to lose or maintain without counting a single calorie, weighing any food, and having the freedom, in the words of the OP, " to go out, eat what I want and when I want, not feel like a monster when I let loose, and still feel satisfied."

    If you've got the willpower to live a lifestyle like this, I'd give it a whirl. It alleviates a lot of the pressures that come from day to day calorie counting, measuring, and working constantly to calculate what you can "fit" in.
  • _Terrapin_
    _Terrapin_ Posts: 4,301 Member
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    Yes im in maintenance and my calories are set to 1740. It's just so hard for me to fit in restaurant food and still feel satisfied at the end of the day so I try not to do it. Is that my problem? I am hungrier at night so I try to save most (1300) of my calories for then BUT I STILL feel hungry while eating things like fruit, dark chocolate, a quest bar, almond milk, etc ALL after dinner

    1740 for maintenance seems kind of low to me. I eat 1,700 to lose a pound a week.

    Funny, since the OP's profile is private, I thought the OP must be working out, enjoying foods they want to eat. Since we do not know their intake, workouts, current BW, and other factors it makes it difficult to gauge if their maintenance intake is too high, too low, or just right. Fortunately, they've indicated their content at this level.
  • Orvillitron
    Orvillitron Posts: 4 Member
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    I recommend weighing yourself less often, say 1x a week? Choose a day that tends to reflect your average for the week accurately (Thursdays work for me). Your diary and nutrition logs should help you choose which day is good for you.

    This way you are tracking your maintenance average, rather than every single day. If you are following your plan most days, and planning for your going out days, you won't see those little blips that cause so much anxiety. If you are up a bit one week, be a bit more careful the next week.

    Weight does fluctuate...during the day, during the week, and if you are a woman, with your hormonal cycles. I give myself plus or minus 2 or 3 pounds per weigh-in unless I start trending up or down.
  • CMENOW30
    CMENOW30 Posts: 3 Member
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    I totally know how you feel...I fight with my urge to over eat and just relax and enjoy my food all the time....I have lost over 60pounds and I still have days where I just eat uncontrollably..sometimes I resent food but I also love it...Glad you posted your comment because it gave me a chance to vent too...
  • TheMaryAnn
    TheMaryAnn Posts: 6
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    I'm exactly in the same boat. I *know* what I should be eating but I just love Pizza, chocolate and all these delicious foods.

    I'm trying to do one cheat day per week - and if I have something social I'm trying to use that day as cheat day.

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